Nomad: A Hanako Tale (12/19)

[atw_ah]

So I couldn't really sleep and I had an idea in my head that I wanted to get out so yeah... This happened. I like it though and I'll follow through with it. It's just a short series about Hanako following Lilly's good end.
Enjoy!

Nomad: A Hanako Tale

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Part 1: First Steps

I take a deep breath as I pick up my pen. In front of me is a blank sheet of paper that will hopefully be filled by the time I'm finished. I close my eyes to try to find the confidence to continue. The house is quiet, the only other person here right now is asleep so she shouldn't bother me. I open my eyes again and stare at this blank sheet that has been laying there for the past 10 minutes.

Come on Hanako, you can do this. You have to do this. If you don't, then what has all this been worth? You're no longer the scared child you were so long ago. You don't need someone to hold your hand whenever you walk out. You're strong, you can do this.

Another deep breath as the pen makes contact with the paper and writes out the first of what I hope will be many lines.

Dear Hisao and Lilly Nakai,

Okay that's one line down. Now I just need to continue. I can't slow down, I have to keep going with this momentum.

We've been together for so many years now. You both have such a great source of support and inspiration in my life that I have no idea how to thank you.

I wish that was just a figure of speech but it's the honest-to-goodness truth. Without Lilly, without Hisao, I wouldn't be here. My life would have been on hold until God knows when. I would have missed out on so much. I sometimes wonder if I would have kept going if not for those two.

I know that you two have sometimes worried about me. I know that you sometimes sacrifice so much of your free time to help me when that specific date comes around. I know that you care and I love you both so very much because of that.

Lilly, I'm a little ashamed to admit this but when we first met, I was glad that you were blind. It made you more approachable because you didn't see my scars. As far as you knew, I was just a overly shy girl. It was because of all the lunches we shared and the many tea parties we had that I had a reason to reach out to strangers again. You're kind, beautiful and more than anyone can ask for as a best friend.

Hisao, I was scared of you when we first met. I didn't expect anyone to come to the library that day, let alone try to talk to me. At first, I didn't want anything to do with you but you were so gentle and so helpful that I came to trust you. We became friends because you saw what I was and still wanted to be near me. Through all these years, your mere presence was enough to get me through many hardships.

My hand starts shaking a bit with anticipation of what's to follow. What I've written so far is just basic honorifics, what's to come is what I need to say, what I'm too scared to say in person.

If it weren't for the two of you, I wouldn't be where I am today.

My hand continues to shake and it's noticeable that my penmanship is slightly off. I put the pen down and take a series of deep breaths to calm myself down.

As I look around the room, I see memories of the life I lived. Pictures hang on the walls of my room that capture many moments in my life that I'll treasure forever. There's a picture of me, Lilly and Hisao after our graduation from Yamaku. Lilly and I opted for a more formal picture but Hisao decided to make a silly face at the last minute. There's a picture of Hisao's parents welcoming Lilly and myself into their home. I was so nervous then that I cried the first night because it had been so long since been in such an atmosphere of a loving family. There's another picture of the three of us standing in front of this house where we've lived for the past six years.

As my eyes trail along the walls, they stop at a pair of pictures that are joined in the same frame. I get out of my seat and take the frame off of the shelf. On one side of the frame is a picture of Hisao and Lilly on their wedding day. Both of their cheeks are bright red because the photo was taken moment after their first kiss as a married couple. On the other side of the frame is a picture from two years after their wedding. It's a picture of Lilly in a hospital bed with Hisao beside her holding their daughter, Midori. I've never seen Lilly more exhausted nor have I seen Hisao cry so much as I did on that day.

I put the picture back on its shelf and turn back to my desk. There is nothing really special about it. It's a plain and simple desk that I use to do my work. The only thing that holds any real significance is the one picture that is positioned perfectly on top of it so that it can easily seen from anywhere in my room. It's one of the few remaining pictures of my parents.

I don't remember them like I used to when I was a child. I can barely remember their voices, I not sure how tall they were, and I can hardly recall their antics, if any. It's sad that their just a distant memory now but I know they loved me, that they still do even in the afterlife and that's enough for me.

Mom, Dad, you've always been watching out for me, haven't you? Please keep doing so and please give me the strength I need to do what I must.

With my resolve reassured, I return to my desk and take up my pen once again. The shaking in my hand has stopped for now so I write quickly before I get to nervous again.

I love both of you some much that it hurts me to say this, but I have to leave. You have done nothing wrong and I could stay in this house if I wanted to, but I don't. I hope you can understand that this is something I must do. If I stayed with you two for the rest of my life, I would happy but unfulfilled.

Hisao, you found you happiness because you went out and chased it. Lilly, your happiness came to you and you accepted it regardless of what everyone else said. Both of you actively went out of your way to find where you belong and it's time for me to do the same.

It's time for me to find my own paradise with my own strength.

"Auntie," a small, soft voice says. "What are you writing? Is it another one of your stories?"

I quickly cover up my letter with another sheet of paper before turning to the source of the voice. A little girl holding a familiar auburn-haired doll in a little blue stands at my doorway. Her light brown hair sways side to side as she rubs the sleep out of her eyes.

Midori is may only be the four-year old daughter of my best friends but I don't think I'll find anyone who I'll love more. She's so playful and curious like her father but also well mannered and respectful like her mother. I'm always glad whenever her parents ask me to baby sit for them because it means that I get to spend more time with this little bundle of joy.

I get out of my seat and wrap her is in a hug. "Don't worry about it, my little flower. It was just something I needed to get done."

Her eyes, the left a light blue and the right a dark brown, suddenly light up and she's full of energy. "If it wasn't too important then can we play before Mommy comes home?" She hops up and down fully expecting my answer to be in the affirmative.

She's wanted me to teach her how to play the piano for as long as she could walk and talk. She's obviously a quick learner considering both her parents are successful teachers. Whenever we're alone, she wants me to teach her a new song so that she can play for her mother. It's because of Lilly that she wants to learn how to play. She wants to show her mother something she has worked hard towards.

I laugh as I ruffle her hair. "Of course we can. Let me just grab the sheet music so we can play together."

She flashes a toothy grin before she rushes down the hall and into the living room where she takes a seat in front of our piano.

I return to my letter and read it over one more time. I not sure if this is exactly what I want to say to them but it's a start.

We'll meet again once I've found the place I truly belong.

Love,

Hanako Ikezawa

I fold my letter and hide it amongst my things. There's no sense in giving it to them now before I have my things organized. When I'm fully prepared to look for my place in the world, I'll give them the letter. Until then it's my little secret.

I look through my collection of sheet music to find something that Midori would like. Ah, this one is perfect. She did say that she wanted to try her hand out on more complicated compositions. She'll love this one for sure.

Debussy's First Arabesque. It has always been one of my personal favorites.

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So as I said, this is just going to be a short series about Hanako trying to find her place in the world. This all came up because for the longest time I had a problem about where I was going to put her in my other series. After a long list of possible ideas, I said screw it and decided to give her a short series to figure out where I'm going to place her.
So yes, this falls within the timeline of my other series Bloodline and for those of you who care, the year in this story is 2017.

Criticism is welcome and encouraged because I'm now very sleepy and have probably made some mistakes here and there, so you guys pointing it out would be helpful.

[Comrade]

so this is a prequel to your other series, nice.
anyway, this is an intresting concept, and i will definetly follow to see how it comes out.

2017 is a special year

[Mirage_GSM]

The first few lines of the letter read a bit like a suicide note.
Aside from that it's a nice story.

[atw_ah]

so this is a prequel to your other series, nice.

I don't know if I would as far as to call it a prequel. While it does occur before Bloodline, it is more of it's own story. The things that will occur in this series won't have a profound effect on the other. It will focus more on Hanako coming to terms with her own life than anything else.

The first few lines of the letter read a bit like a suicide note.

That was unintentional, though I guess it does make some sense as to why it came out that way. When one writes a suicide note, it's to leave behind something for others to read and understand why said person did what she/he did. It's a way to say goodbye while they leave their life behind.
In a way, Hanako is doing the same thing here. She has spent the last ten years with Hisao and Lilly and relied on them to help her through her life. She has yet to truly stand on her own two feet. So in order to force herself to try, she has to leave behind her old life. She's going to say goodbye through her letter because if she were to do it in person, she'll fall back to old habits and never find her answer.

I forgot to mention this when I first posted the story: Nomad is not going to be written in the traditional sense. It's not going to be a fully realized narrative but rather snapshots of Hanako's life which will be shown through her letters. Hanako will be narrating her life as she writes her letters, in the same fashion that the first part was presented(She's writing her letter line-for-line while she takes the time in between to reflect on her experiences or interact with other characters.)
I'm saying this now because I want to get your guys' opinion about it and how it can be better presented. Plus, I think it's a fun little literary experiment.