Octovaitor's Story Time (Explicit)

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Shail
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Re: Octovaitor's Story Time (Explicit)

Post by Shail »

I can't help but wonder what Rin would do if she walked into the student council sex room <_< .. Rin, Kenji, and Akira have some interesting reactions to situations xD Rin would sit there and stare or make a completely unrelated comment(While they are having sex, Rin says "Are you aware the freckles on your back look like a butterfly?" Kenji jumps in and yells something about feminazis and world domination by exploiting mens sexual preferences, and Akira would probably join in <_< ... Rin would be best *nods*
~I hate endings~ Fan fiction is the only way to keep KS alive!
~The only good ending is a sequel~
~Want to know why I REALLY fucking hate endings? Mirai Nikki Want to know why I love epilogues? Watch the Mirai Nikki OVA
~Mirai Nikki: A perfect example of endings I hate~
Hanako -> Rin -> Shizune -> ? -> ?
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octovaitor
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Re: Octovaitor's Story Time (Explicit)

Post by octovaitor »

Steinherz wrote: Yay for Anachronism Screw.
Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull was released a year after KS takes place.

Also: I can't seem to read this fic without breaking out into laughter. Probably because it's so out there :lol:
Thanks for reading. As for the anachronism, I apologize, but I thought it was a funny joke, as at my local board game store, literally everyone has an opinion on that movie, mostly divided into the camps of: "It's an abomination; worst movie ever; they raped the franchise" and "It was fun; pretty decent; it wasn't a complete betrayal". And I'm glad I was able to make you laugh, if nothing else.
Well, you can take me for a little while
You can take me, you can make me smile in the end.
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Shail
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Re: Octovaitor's Story Time (Explicit)

Post by Shail »

By the way Octoman, is this the end of the fanfic or will there be more chapters? It looks equally suitable to ending as it is now(a three part one shot, a three shot, a short story?) or continuing o-o I can't quite tell DX
~I hate endings~ Fan fiction is the only way to keep KS alive!
~The only good ending is a sequel~
~Want to know why I REALLY fucking hate endings? Mirai Nikki Want to know why I love epilogues? Watch the Mirai Nikki OVA
~Mirai Nikki: A perfect example of endings I hate~
Hanako -> Rin -> Shizune -> ? -> ?
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octovaitor
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Re: Octovaitor's Story Time (Explicit)

Post by octovaitor »

Shail wrote:I can't help but wonder what Rin would do if she walked into the student council sex room <_< .. Rin, Kenji, and Akira have some interesting reactions to situations xD Rin would sit there and stare or make a completely unrelated comment(While they are having sex, Rin says "Are you aware the freckles on your back look like a butterfly?" Kenji jumps in and yells something about feminazis and world domination by exploiting mens sexual preferences, and Akira would probably join in <_< ... Rin would be best *nods*
Sounds funny to me.
Well, you can take me for a little while
You can take me, you can make me smile in the end.
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octovaitor
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Re: Octovaitor's Story Time (Explicit)

Post by octovaitor »

Hello, Readers! I know it got weird, and decidedly unsexy for about 99% of you, and any enjoyment you got out of it probably came from riffing at it. But thanks for reading, all of you. I want to get better at this whole fanfiction game, so I appreciate your criticism as much as I do any praise. Please don't hold back.
Well, you can take me for a little while
You can take me, you can make me smile in the end.
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Shail
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Re: Octovaitor's Story Time (Explicit)

Post by Shail »

Doesn't it? Imagine having a secret sex dungeon IN THE DAMN SCHOOL, and you're in it, DURING SCHOOL, having freaky bondage sex with your same-sex friend and translator IN SCHOOL, and suddenly you hear someone say "Your freckles look like a butterfly", I would personally lay a brick on the spot and jump a foot or two in the air, at least as Misha I would, I get the feeling Shizune wouldn't noticed(Not so wahaha...)

Only criticism I really have is the remaining question: Is this an ongoing or finished project? I can't quite tell, generally with one shots they are finished in a single post, and this was spread across three, however from the looks of the end of chapter 3, it could easily be over or keep going. Overall though I'd say you did a decent job especially if this is your first work, I'm trying my hand at my first fanfic atm and JEEZE it's harder than it looks.
~I hate endings~ Fan fiction is the only way to keep KS alive!
~The only good ending is a sequel~
~Want to know why I REALLY fucking hate endings? Mirai Nikki Want to know why I love epilogues? Watch the Mirai Nikki OVA
~Mirai Nikki: A perfect example of endings I hate~
Hanako -> Rin -> Shizune -> ? -> ?
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octovaitor
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Re: Octovaitor's Story Time (Explicit)

Post by octovaitor »

Shail wrote:Doesn't it? Imagine having a secret sex dungeon IN THE DAMN SCHOOL, and you're in it, DURING SCHOOL, having freaky bondage sex with your same-sex friend and translator IN SCHOOL, and suddenly you hear someone say "Your freckles look like a butterfly", I would personally lay a brick on the spot and jump a foot or two in the air, at least as Misha I would, I get the feeling Shizune wouldn't noticed(Not so wahaha...)

Only criticism I really have is the remaining question: Is this an ongoing or finished project? I can't quite tell, generally with one shots they are finished in a single post, and this was spread across three, however from the looks of the end of chapter 3, it could easily be over or keep going. Overall though I'd say you did a decent job especially if this is your first work, I'm trying my hand at my first fanfic atm and JEEZE it's harder than it looks.
This is an ongoing work. I haven't written anything else for this story yet due to two factors: 1) I really wanted to see how people reacted to chapter 3 before I continued and 2) I'm trying to get settled at my university. That being said, I had a blast writing this, even if the end product was neither good nor erotic to most people, so I plan to write more, even if people enjoy it only on a "crack fic/what the hell is this guy writing" level.
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Shail
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Re: Octovaitor's Story Time (Explicit)

Post by Shail »

I found it to be fairly decent, not "amazing" but it's definitely not bad, as far as the erotic content goes it needs some work, it may just be me but from my perspective it takes a bit of warm up and a nice long path for erotic content to qualify as erotic to me, when there's breaks, jumps, and/or comedy in the middle of it, the path tends to reset. Doing so repetitively keeps the story from reaching that point, if the pure goal of the story is to incite erotic feelings I would suggest putting all of the wtf/shits n giggles in the chapter BEFORE they start spanking and whatnot. Just my personal opinion, others may feel differently but the few erotic stories that I actually enjoyed followed a path similar to it. Comedic relief in the middle of blindfolded chick masturbating tends to change the mood of the story instantly and it's hard to get that mood back with this kind of subject
~I hate endings~ Fan fiction is the only way to keep KS alive!
~The only good ending is a sequel~
~Want to know why I REALLY fucking hate endings? Mirai Nikki Want to know why I love epilogues? Watch the Mirai Nikki OVA
~Mirai Nikki: A perfect example of endings I hate~
Hanako -> Rin -> Shizune -> ? -> ?
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octovaitor
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Re: Octovaitor's Story Time (Explicit)

Post by octovaitor »

Whilst the lovely tunes of Crush 40 play, let's actually get some new content in here! I am your (hardly) humble storyteller, Octovaitor (or Octoman to Shail). No (poorly written} porn today, but some plot. As per usual, I'm happy to take comments and criticism, and I encourage any feedback you wish to give. I can give no guarantee for quality, but I hope to get better. Thanks for reading, and apologies in advance.

Chapter 4: Good Times to Come

I awoke to the ringing of my phone's alarm. I blinked my eyes a few times and sat myself up. Shizune was sitting on the bed in front of me, fully clothed, and I could see Misha over on the other side packing up the room, with an uncharacteristic air of subtlety.

Shizune clearly had something on her mind, with a rare expression of guilt etched on. She took my hands in hers, and I just sat there dumbly. She played with my fingers for a minute, but then I turned my head over to my phone to look at the time. I jumped out of bed and looked around for my clothes. I had to haul ass back to my room, take a shower, and finish the homework that I had begun yesterday. Although my alarm had been generous compared to my normal wakeup call, I had underestimated what needed to be done last night, and I couldn't waste much time.

I felt a tap on my shoulders and turned to see Misha with a pile of my clothes from last night in her hands. I jerked them away and tried to throw them on as quickly as possible. Misha lacked her trademark grin and also looked expectantly at me.

With clothes on, i bid them a quick goodbye and headed out of the basement. I grabbed my books and school stuff that was sitting in the room whilst I had been exploring. I figured Misha and Shizune would be able to clean up without me just fine, but at the same time, their behavior was troubling.

I decided to confront them after class about it, and instead focus in the meantime on getting back to my dorm and then getting to class. I was almost to my room when another thought seized my brain, and then the reality of last night hit me like a meteor.

I actually had sex last night. Not the kind I had anticipated for my first time, and certainly not whom I imagined with, to be sure, but still, it was sex. But beyond any pride I felt just for having it was dwarfed by the sheer thrill of what they did to me. Getting tied up and pulled and pinched and controlled was fun, in a weird sort of way. I could definitely take another a go at this. Maybe they had more tricks up their sleeves? Shizune had to be holding back something mighty and cruel, and I wanted another taste. Maybe next time they could tie me up again and force me to get them off or maybe...

"HISAO! WHAT DID THEY DO TO YOU MAN???"

Oh lord help me. Kenji was awake.

"Did they torture you? Tie you up and beat you? Were you gagged? You didn't talk did you?"

"Kenji, what're you babbling on..."

"YOU TALKED, DIDN'T YOU! i knew it, you spineless cur! NO ONE, and I mean NO ONE, was supposed to know about my precious supply of jelly beans, but now the feminists know! They'll be on the offensive now! I can't withstand such an attack! Hisao, you must answer for your crimes against all of MANkind, you fiend! You Judas, you traitorous swine! I knew I couldn't trust anyone with my jelly bean whereabouts! I'll punch you in the fucking soul, you piece of..."

"Enough. I wasn't kidnapped by anyone. I was doing work for the student council. And what the hell are you talking about with jelly beans?

Kenji stopped and stared at me for a moment. His demeanor relaxed slightly, but I wasn't out of the woods.

"Never mind, crisis averted. Why didn't you tell me, man? I was monitoring our hallway all night waiting for you to get back!"

I narrowed my gaze and stared at him. Was he that lonely that he'd sit there for hours just to see me?

"Uh, why did you spend all night waiting for me to get back?"

"Because, man! We're soldiers in a war on feminism! The last sane men in an insane world! The protectorate of the sacred jelly beans, who's taste is renowned in the realms of man!" he ranted, more defensively than usual.

Definitely lonely, but still a crazy prick.

"Look, I'm going to take a shower and get ready for school. Catch you later." I said as I unlocked my door and scooted myself in.

"Yeah, later," Kenji sighed.



I made it to class with time to spare and my homework completed. I fidgeted around and attempted to reach the sweet spot in one's desk and chair where you were comfortable but had enough range of motion to still take notes. As I was doing so, more students were funneling in. Following the isolated Hanako, Shizune and Misha were the last into the room.

Misha looked bubbly, but she wasn't smiling as vibrantly as she would normally, and Shizune still had a sad, resigned look in her eye, but it wouldn't attract any real suspicion by any of the other students. It bothered me though.

I beckoned them, and the two stopped dead in their tracks and turned to me. Misha's grin slipped off of her face but Shizune's expression didn't change.

"Alright guys, can we have a word about-"

"Good morning class! Science waits for no man, so we need to get started early. Lots of ground to cover, so let's dive right into it." said Mutou as he walked into class, with more vigor than usual.

I turned back to Misha and Shizune, but they had dashed over to their seats. I gave a pleading look to Misha, and she mouthed "after school" to me. At least I had something to look forward to whilst Mutou was lecturing.



When all of the day's classes were over, I joined Misha and Shizune as they got up to leave. The three of us walked in silence to the Student Council room, and Misha and Shizune's expressions were as dour as they were in the morning. When we reached the Student Council Room, i immediately put my school stuff aside and pulled out a few chairs. Misha sat in one of them, and Shizune locked the door behind us and then took the other. Misha decided to start.

"Hiichan, me and Shiichan are really sorry for, uh, going a little bit crazy last night." Misha began.

[We understand if you feel violated or that you felt we were too rough or too weird.]

I looked at them in confusion. "Guys, what're you talking about? I had a fun time last night."

The two blinked and looked at each other in bewilderment.

"Wait, so...you're not mad?"

[Even at the stuff like Misha licking your...precious bodily fluids...out of me? Or you getting a taste of your own...precious bodily fluids? Or...]

[Shiichan, why can't you just call it semen or cum?] Misha interrupted.

[It sounds really nasty outside of the bedroom. But we thought you didn't have a good time. You didn't say too much while we were doing it, and you weren't super enthusiastic at some of the stuff. I thought you were doing it just to get out of the situation without offending us.]

[Well actually, Hiichan played along with me when I was teasing him] Misha recalled.

Shizune shot a look at me, but then continued. [Still, when it was all over, I thought you didn't have much fun.]

"Then in the morning, you didn't say much and left kinda in a hurry. We thought you were angry or freaked out," Misha said, whilst still dictating it in sign to Shizune.

They thought they had messed up? That I didn't have fun or that they might have abused me? Far from it. I had to put an end to that notion right away.

"Look. I had a great time last night. I didn't have to agree. I let you guys tie me up. It was consensual. You guys made it clear that I could stop it if I wanted, even if you were both very eager. It was odd, it was different, but it wasn't really unpleasant. I thought maybe the whole cum licking out of Shizune might have been a little much, but otherwise I was fine. You guys eased me into it and weren't super hard on me, considering my heart." I paused, then added, "I'd even be willing to try some more of it, if you want, as long as you guys take it slow."

Shizune and Misha's face both immediately brightened at my statement.

"So that means we get to have more crazy sex! Hooray! Isn't that great Shii-chan?"

Shizune gave Misha a look of indignation at her choice of words, but then smiled and signed a response.

[Alright, we can definitely arrange more intimate encounters. But] and she pointed at me and flashed the same cocky grin she would use to decimate some poor schmuck at risk or insult Lilly and continued with [you better be ready to give it your A-game. If you want my love, you gotta earn it!]

Misha then decided to throw her hat into the ring. "Yeah! And she's not the only one. We both like to get naughty and be in charge!"

I chuckled at their showboating. "Yeah, i can be submissive, but I'm a man of variety. One day, you'll be the ones at my beck and call! I said with gusto.

We all laughed at that one. And then all we turned our eyes over to the rug in the corner.

"I'm game if you are." I said to the two of them as Misha signed it.

[I'm always game for it] Shizune signed back.

"Ooooooooo! Me three!" Misha interjected.



________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Alright, The next chapter is already in the works. There will be porn. Please pass me some feedback. Thanks for reading. If you find spelling/grammar mistakes, Point 'em out. Thanks for reading. Good night.
Last edited by octovaitor on Thu Sep 05, 2013 11:56 pm, edited 2 times in total.
Well, you can take me for a little while
You can take me, you can make me smile in the end.
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Steinherz
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Re: Octovaitor's Story Time (Explicit)

Post by Steinherz »

All I can say to this chapter:
Image

I like it. Nice change of pace. And of course Hisao is fine with it :lol:
I mean who wouldn't (people who don't like bondage don't count)? Two attractive girls and some bondage? Why not?
I write take a look, would you kindly?
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