There were Five (One-Shot)

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Megumeru
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There were Five (One-Shot)

Post by Megumeru » Fri Oct 31, 2014 6:20 am

This is a one-shot for Halloween that I've come up with while I'm working on 'The Haunting'. It follows after Misha's episode and reconciliation and happened before Shizune's good ending. Aside from the characters featured, it has no direct connection to 'The Haunting'. I hope you enjoy it as much as I am writing it :D


There were Five

I once walked down a street late at night, during the afterhours in Tokyo. Back then, I was just a snot-nosed brat who knew nothing but what I’ll be having for dinner that night; twelve years old, to be exact. It was after an unfortunate entanglement that I had with the school concerning an upcoming sports festival that led me to this…predicament, but nonetheless it was the start that sparked my fascination towards the subject which I am about to discuss. Up to this day, I can still vaguely reminisce the day; the scent of bark and leaves, the faint patter of footsteps that stalked in the middle of the night, the woman in old 19th century European dress…



Did I say that right?

Yes, I believe I did. A woman wearing a 19th century European dress; might I add that she’s carrying a parasol in the middle of the night?

It was surreal…mysterious, if there is a better way to describe it as she suddenly appear just meters away from me under a street light. She took a few steps forward, twirling her parasol and grins eerily that immediately send chills down my shoulders and spine. I had little to no choice; it was late, and this particular route is one of the shortest to reach the haven I call ‘home’. At most hour, this route is particularly safe to travel and it wasn’t the least bit eerie when it was under sufficient lighting; after dark however, it became an entirely different world—especially for a youngling back in those days. The flickering street-lights, the darkened alleyways, as well as the absence of a single living soul—bar the woman who was before me—made it into a throve of nightmares and horrors that one could thought of. If I were to turn around and took the other way around— which was a lot more well-lit, mind you — I might’ve felt less neither frightened; of course, doing so would meant doubling the distance and time it would take for me to return—and my parents aren’t the type to appreciate late-night excursions. So, I reluctantly trudge forward. Not wanting any trouble—and as dumb as I was back in the day—I keep my head down and rushed pass her as fast as I could, hoping not to be noticed. The closer I was to her, the louder my heartbeat grew and I swore I could hear it as if it was the only sound in an entirely blank room. Things got a bit creepier when I was only a few meters from her, to which she let out an eerie laughter that gave me a sudden burst of speed to move forward and quickly be done with this encounter. When the moment was passed, I turn around to check if she was still there and; just like what these entities do in normal circumstances, vanished into thin air without a trace. Looking back, it may have only been just a cosplayer or a pervert with a strange fetish, but it was at that very moment that my interest towards the supernatural and the paranormal took its roots.

Oh, I’m sorry, I believe I haven’t introduced myself, have I?

I’m Ryou Miyazaki, a student of Yamaku High in class 3-2 and the vice-president of the Paranormal Research Club. What I’m about to tell you is an extract from one of the files we’ve documented over the past year—this one in particular is one of our most recent, and was recorded during October just before we—in regards to the president of the Student Council and her vice which allowed us to perform such activity, bless their soul—hit for the weekends. Yamaku High—like any other school—has its mysteries and lore that surrounds it, often than not it involves the supernatural. The way how Yamaku was setup as a school for the disabled and prides itself with an active 24-hour nursing staff meant that it is relatively comparable to a hospital—to a degree. Now, I am not too keen on digging through Yamaku’s history and its student portfolios, but from what has been gathered, there are and there has been a number of incidents involving student death in and around the campus. Most of it relates to sickness and misfortune of the student, but there those who fall in an entirely different kind of category.

Either due to stress or the discovery of their bleak future, there are students that took this particular ‘route’ as a quick-fix; suicide. Tragic, yes, but these lost souls often end up as one of the haunters of Yamaku High that roam the halls at night and kept some students awake until dawn; and that, my good audience, is where the Paranormal Research Club takes its interest in.

This is one of our recorded encounters from one of our files, one that took place recently in late-October.

------------

“You’re requesting for…what?” retorts the vice-president, raising his eyebrow in near disbelief. “I’m sorry, but I really have to confirm this once again.

“Like I said,” I reply; “the Paranormal Research Club would like the permission to remain outside student curfew for tonight. We’re planning to do a thorough investigation.”

“And that investigation is…?”

A grin creeps upon me as I enthusiastically flip my notes, eager to introduce our current investigation. “Kawano’s wandering spirit.”

‘Kawano’s Wandering Spirit’ is an old ghost story that has been going around in Yamaku High since its first establishment—at least that is what we heard. The story revolves around Momoka Kawano, a prodigious female third-year student of Yamaku High a few years back who, to her misfortune, was diagnosed with Huntington’s disease. She was an astounding student, a prodigy among prodigy that was recognized widely across the entire campus as the ‘ill-fated genius’—a nod to how she live, technically, with borrowed time. The entire school board and the Yamaku Trust Foundation recognized her not only for her intelligence, but also her talent in the department of music and the arts. Her juniors and fellow schoolmates admired her and idolized her as Yamaku’s true princess—her title as the Student Council President adds to her charm.

That, however, was short-lived.

Around the time before the finals, Kawano’s symptoms acted and terrified her; it was like an alarm clock that echo in the middle of the night and awakened her to a cruel reality—that she was living on borrowed time. The stress from the coming exams, the revelation, along with the expectations from those around her terrified her and pressured her so much that she broke; it was all too late when they realized how severe it has been. One afternoon, Kawano went into an episode where she nearly murdered a student with a mop before bursting into laughter. The Nurse and his assistants came, took the student, and quickly sedated Kawano. When questioned, the wounded student recounted the events from how it started as a playful tease up to its bloody end. It was then that they realized that Kawano also suffered bipolar disorder.

Sadly, her episodes didn’t end there.

A few days after the incident, Kawano was spotted roaming around at night through the halls in a set-route, dragging a mop. A week later, she committed suicide in a classroom by hanging.

Tragic...but oddly enough, the pattern of her strange behavior continues even after the graduation of her year group. Night guards and shift-nurses occasionally reported the sound of a mop being dragged through the empty halls of Yamaku; it became even more sensational when one of the night-shift nurse fainted when she heard a knock on the infirmary to find it was the late-‘Kawano’, armed with a steel mop and a pale smile that stretches across her face. Ever since then, this story has been passed on from mouth to mouth until eventually; it reached into the ears of the Paranormal Research Club.

We were determined to investigate and see this through—finding ‘Kawano’ or not.

“So, would you allow it?” I said. “You would, won’t you, VP?”

The vice-president sighs, scratching his head. “I’ll have to ask the president for this…you can come along.”

The vice-president quickly gestures me to follow and immediately, I am escorted to the Student Council office to meet the infamous Student Council president. When we enter the room, the strong smell of paper and ink wafts the air as we proceed to enter into the lair; which quickly garnered the attention of the secretary who is busy sorting out the stamped and approved documents of the president. She laughs extravagantly, waving her hand in enthusiasm as if to match her short-pink hair; soon after, the president took notice of our presence and immediately, the vice-president raises both of his hands to communicate.

Although I am incapable of understanding what is going on (aside from admiring the dexterity of the hands of the VP and the president), but I assume it is a simple introduction concerning me. When the VP has finished, the bespectacled female president rises from her seat and proceeds towards us in an calm and professional manner, quickly fixing her glasses as it droop down by an inch before she keenly observe me with utmost interest; either it was a rarity for me to be here or simple curiosity is up in the air.



I’m familiar with the Student Council President. Shizune Hakamichi is infamous throughout Yamaku High as a relentless task master that runs the understaffed Student Council as if her life depends on it—she does a good job of it as well. I’ve worked with her before during our second year in high school—I was a part of the Student Council back then—and I can still vaguely recall how precise and dedicated she was to her job; too dedicated for the taste of most of its members. I admire her dedication towards her task and wished to assist her as much as I could, but alas circumstances involving Lilly (who’s in Scotland by now) and her drove most of us away from the Student Council. Lilly’s leadership tends to lean more towards the ‘softer’ side, often producing good results albeit doubling the time with tardiness; Shizune on the other hand, accomplished what was to be precisely on time and in good quality—albeit causing a lot of distress amongst the members.

But I won’t bore you with the details on how it all turned out.

After a quick introduction from Vice-President Nakai, I quickly explain my proposal towards her and; although she lacks the ability to converse verbally and is deaf by birth, the VP is kind enough to translate what I wanted to convey quickly and efficiently. It’s amusing watching both of them interact in such a fashion, lightly chuckling, grinning, taunting (maybe), and other shenanigans—it’s almost as if they’re in sync with one another. After a short mime from the two of them, the VP turns to my attention and nods in approval, but quickly stopping me from continuing any further.

“On one condition,” he adds. “Shi—I mean, the President and I would like to be there to supervise.”



Well, we could use the hand so I guess why not?

------------

“Oh? Are they coming along as well?” Yuuko remarks softly, to which the VP and the president returns with a short ‘good evening’ bow.

“We’re here to supervise your club activity since it is pass the allotted curfew,” said the VP, before he jokingly chuckles. “Although to be honest, I think the President would like to participate herself.”

The night before we set-up for the investigation, I explain the circumstances to the president of the Paranormal Research Club, Yuuko, about the predicament and the requirement in order for us to be able to perform this activity. She didn’t mind—barely cared, even—and was glad to accept the extra hand. When it comes to the paranormal, nothing surpasses the creepy enthusiasm of Yuuko Hanekawa, the president of the Paranormal Research Club. A quiet girl, one who doesn’t speak unless it is of importance; however, she’d gladly open up to those she’s familiar with—her sudden change of character from timid to enthusiastic mischief is often attributed with her encounter of the paranormal. After the bicker in the Student Council back in my second year, I left the council and was considering of joining a new club. In what I believe to be a fortunate encounter, I met Yuuko in one of the halls of Yamaku who happened to be working hard on recruiting members for a fledging Paranormal Research Club. Her rather ‘odd’ presentation reminded me of that strange encounter back when I was just a child, thus I ‘somehow’ convinced myself to join.



Maybe it’s just me, but there’s something about Yuuko that I can’t pin-point exactly that compelled me to help her. She was enrolled in Yamaku after a car accident that left a piece of metal lodged into her head, thus occasionally she would have one of those amnesiac episodes where she would forgot what she was doing and who she is. That’s why in most cases, I volunteered myself to act as an ‘external hard-drive’ to ‘save’ her memory by recording it in a secondary notebook I carry along.

But oh, here I go again, trailing myself in nonsense…

Where were we?



Right!

The investigation for ‘Kawano’s Wandering Spirit’ is simple. As laid out by Yuuko herself, we would investigate the classroom where she committed suicide with a camera ready at hand. As direct interaction with a wandering spirit—as she is classified—can be dangerous, we plan to relegate to photographs to capture and record her existence within our album; for keepsake and collection, at the behest of the occult maniac president. Further, Yuuko has drawn herself a route around the school’s hall where reportedly—according to the night guards and night-shift nurses—‘Kawano’ haunts. I admit, it is a simple pattern that traces the outline of the building where the classes were; to our fortune (or misfortune), it is also one of the least lit halls and things are expected to be particularly dark. Furthermore,

“No flashlights…!” Yuuko remarks, “We need the perfect condition for ‘Kawano’ to show herself!”

…is what she said.

And thus, our investigation begins.

------------

The human mind is a powerful adversary when treading in the dark. When treading in total darkness, it may sometime cause certain images to suddenly project before you as if it was there in the first place—either this is due to certain range of emotions or imagination is up to your speculation. With this in mind, sometimes these ‘projections’ may fool you into believing that there is ‘something’ over the veil of darkness that envelopes the scene when in reality, there was nothing but the wind; a construction of your imagination, if I do say so myself. Spirits are supernatural entities, one that often eludes the naked eye and is often invisible under the light; that, of course, doesn’t stop us from actually trying to ‘capture’ these entities, either by sight, sound, or through low-light exposures—such as a camera. Of course, ‘physical’ evidence is nothing compared to personal experience.

“We’ll start with a group photo to document our investigation,” I said as I flip the switch of the camera to ‘ON’. I set the camera on timer and set it on the edge of a window; the classroom we are to investigate serves as a background. “Ok, get ready!”

“Cheese…!”

*SNAP*

Hastily, I retrieve the camera and sling it on my neck and secure it. Yuuko quickly gestures me to be prepared before she slowly, cautiously opens the door; the wheels that slides the door open creaks and reveals a dark and empty classroom that is void of life—an almost perfect condition for an apparition to stage its appearance. The president and the vice-president are the first to step in, excited, eager, and also afraid of what might be lurking in the darkness—the former, in particular, seems interested in the entire ordeal more than the latter that joined out of obligation. Then, Yuuko moves in before I follow inside, into the darkness. As our objective is to document the existence of ‘Kawano’; or debunk it if no proof are documented—Yuuko immediately draws a recorder from the pocket of her vest and starts recording. For a few minute, we tread the room with utmost care as our eyes slowly adjust itself to the darkness and we begin to see things clearly. We stayed in the classroom for neither about five minutes without incident nor any signs of apparition — much to the disappointment of both female presidents. My wristwatch tells me that it is pass one—around 2AM, deep within the Hour of the Ox. Then, there is a sound…

*CLANG*

*CLANG*

*CLANG*

It came from the halls. Judging from it, it is the echo of an object—either a steel rod or wood—that is being dragged across the empty halls. Yuuko slowly reaches for the door and slides it open, revealing nothing but eerie silence; both ends of the halls are shrouded in a veil of darkness, seemingly leading to nowhere. In a very ‘Yuuko’ fashion, the occult maniac immediately smiles with glee before she turns to me, eager to express what she has in mind.

“I’m guessing she’s on her route!” Yuuko whispers with a slight bit of enthusiasm. “We should start checking her route and see if we can document her.”

“What are you suggesting?” I reply, worried. Honestly, not all ideas Yuuko brought forward can be considered ‘bright’ on occasion.

“’Kawano’ is reported to have travel within the halls of this building in a determined ‘square’ pattern,” she starts. “If we are to trace the route, there’s a good chance we might encounter her.”

“What if she’s on the other end of the building when we are tracing the route?”

“That is why we’ll split up and hold four ‘corners’ of the route.”

It was a simple plan. In order for us to initiate an encounter, we are supposed to wait on the corners of each corners of her route. We are to communicate by cell-phone message if we are to encounter her, so as not to disturb her and cause further problem for us; Yuuko doesn’t forget to encourage us to use the cellphone camera to document whenever possible. We are to move and trace her route one by one, reaching to the next corner and proceed to ‘tap’ the shoulder of the next person, where he/she then would trace the hall while the former would stand guard on the corner. With four of us in this little ‘hunting party’, it is relatively easy and simple for us to cover all four corners and trace them until the end of the ‘Hour of the Ox’; hopefully by then, we have finished documenting her existence.

“Are there no objection to this plan?” I ask one last time, confirming any last worries. VP Nakai quickly translates what I said for the deaf-mute President who—judging by her reaction—is equally enthusiastic to see this through.

“Then let’s get to it.”

------------

We decide to make our own way to the corners, slowly treading the halls to find any clues or hints that might lead us to our discovery. After a few minutes of walking, I reach my corner—empty, as to be expected—and proceed to stand on guard, awaiting further instruction from the master planner. As the clock ticks further, the halls are becoming darker and darker; the fact that there is almost no lighting nor windows in this area gave off an almost eerie, abandoned hall coated with a fresh paint of uncertainty and fear. I tune in to the sounds around me, eyes squinting to adjust to the darkness as I wait and hopefully catch the wandering spirit and document it. Closing my eyes, I try to tune in deeper into my surroundings…



*CLANG*

*CLANG*

*CLANG*

There it is!

My phone buzzes to life and with it, comes a message from Yuuko asking whether or not everyone is ready; a unified consensus follows after. It has begun.

[Ryou, you may start now.]

There’s something about walking at school in the middle of the night that gives off an entirely different vibe than what it was in the morning. As I cautiously trudge along the poorly lit hall, I can’t help but feel alien in a world that man aren’t supposed to be; the invention of fire and light is meant to stave off the darkness and create a whole different world. Humans are naturally creatures of light; those who walk under the bright rays of the sun and the illumination of a torch. No matter how brave you are or how skeptical one is towards the existence of the supernatural, the lingering feeling of ‘fear’ when treading in the dark will always be present.

After a few minutes, I finally reach the next corner where I am supposed to rendezvous with another participant. The entire hall is near-total darkness, and it is difficult to see who it is aside from the uniform that differentiates whether it is a boy or a girl. I squint my eyes as I come up upon the corner; the figure, which I assume to be a female student judging from her uniform, silently waves at me and gestures me to move closer.

“Took you awhile,” said the figure; undeniably, it is the voice of Yuuko Hanekawa. “Find anything interesting along the way?”

I tap her shoulder, sighs. “Not much…for now.”

“Then, I’ll be going. Take it easy.”

It is around at this point of time that fatigue starts to encroach upon me as I watch her waddle away into the darkness. I rest myself on the corner of the wall and check my illuminated wristwatch for a split second; the arms of the watch points that it is two-fifteen, which tells me that it takes about five minutes to walk—at a brisk pace—from one corner to the next. Within that time, I have the leisure to wait and stave off the tiredness with a little shut-eye until the last person arrives from where I started and taps me; that, I estimate would take about twenty minutes.

And so I waited. For how long, I am uncertain exactly as—even with my estimated allotted time—others might take a bit longer or slower, depending on how well they can cope with the darkness. After a while, it is inevitable for me to keep myself awake any longer and unfortunately, I fall into slumber; for how long, I am uncertain, but it isn’t until the last person whom I am expecting arrive and awaken me did I realize that I have involuntarily dozed off.

“Oh! I-I’m sorry!” I quickly reply. “Must have dozed off…”

The last person—a female student—draws back silently from my reaction; surprised, probably, considering how I may look like something else rather than a student she’s expecting to meet. She remains silent, retreating towards the corner where I accidentally dozed off and watches me from the darkness silently, as if telling me ‘it’s your turn now’; judging from how she didn’t mutter a single word, I’m assuming it is the President of the Student Council, Hakamichi. Quickly, I dust myself and straighten my vest before giving a ‘salute’ to the President and am well on my way to tread into the darkness. As the cycle has been restarted, at the end of the this corner I am expecting to meet Yuuko; according to the order, she will meet the vice-president Nakai, where in turn he will be tagging president Hakamichi which in turn will restart the cycle back to me; seems logical.

…strangely, I can’t help but shake the feeling that there’s something odd with that logic.

------------

The entire investigation comes to a close at three-thirty five, after twenty or thirty laps around the building. Each one of us has stood on each four corners of the route twice, maybe three times—I don’t know. During each trip, there’s about one or two occasions where the previous echo—the sound of what seems to be a steel rod being dragged and tapped rhythmically across the floor—plays itself somewhere in the dark before it vanish just as mysteriously as it began. With the investigation coming to a close, Yuuko immediately urge me to pen the investigation and file the report to the club’s ‘guidebook’; the photos we took will be printed tomorrow, fingers crossed for good result. Immediately, I start asking the two ‘volunteer’ members if they happened to notice something peculiar that we did not.

“There’s nothing much to say,” remarks the VP. “It is a creepy experience—I for one am not too keen on visiting the school so late at night anymore.”

I then proceed to ask President Hakamichi, to which the VP gladly translates for me. “It was a change a good change of pace. I don’t see why you can’t do this again in the future,” the VP translates. “…that’s what she said.”

“It’s too bad we didn’t get to see ‘Kawano’s appirition,” I said in return. “I ended up falling asleep at one point.”

“You did?”

“Yeah; thankfully, President Hakamichi arrived and woke me up—can you give her my thanks?”

“…President Hakamichi…? You mean Shizune woke you up?”

I stop and lower my pen and note for a moment. “…yes…?”

“That’s odd…” replies VP-Nakai. “Because the President’s the one who relieve me from my spot—are you sure it’s Shiz—I mean, Hakamichi?”

“I am certain…” I reply. “She’s wearing Yamaku’s girl’s uniform, I can’t mistake that.”

“Could it be Hanekawa instead?”

“I was the one who replaces Yuuko from her position, so it’s very unlikely that it’s her that—”

And almost immediately, Yuuko bursts into laughter and shakes her head muttering the word ‘not bad, not bad at all’. She clears her throat and—with a smile and an index finger raised to proof a point, she starts. “Did you realize that there are only four of us?”

Both the VP and I nod in unison. She smiles cunningly and continues. “And did you know that there was a fifth person amongst us during the investigation?”

It is in that moment that everything hits me.

The route that ‘Kawano’ patrols has a total of four corners—like a rectangle—that spans an entire floor of one of Yamaku’s buildings; all four of us occupied one end of the corner each. The way how it works in the investigation, one of us will start to trace the hall that leads to the next corner where a second participant will take over, thus repeating the cycle. The thing is, the moment the first person left his corner—which is I—the last person will have to trace double of that of the rest, bypassing one empty corner in order to reach the first; but when the last person ‘tags’ someone else in that supposedly empty spot…

“Then who’s the fifth,” ask the VP. “Who did I replace? I swear it was a female student!”

*CLANG*

*CLANG*

*CLANG*

The echo of a steel mop being dragged across the floor resounded once more across the building. We look at one another and in what I call as a silent consensus, we agreed that maybe this is a good time to finish the investigation; thus, we part ways and return to our dorms. The next day, the photos we took during the investigation were printed; the ones that were taken within the classroom held no significant evidence, nor was there anything of interest— until my eye caught something peculiar; the initial group photo before we start the night. It took me a moment, but upon realizing it a smile creeps up upon me and I quickly write my report and file them together into the ‘guidebook’.

From right to left, there was myself, Yuuko Hanekawa, President Shizune Hakamichi, and Vice-President Hisao Nakai—all present in the shot. Just to the left of Nakai, there was another female student—one that is carrying a steel mop with a haunting smile and a pale complexion.


In total, there were five.

-終わり-

Author's Note:
This is just a short one-shot story I come up for Halloween. I hope you enjoy :)

For those of you who are familiar with my on-going work, the character featured here are original characters part of the 'Paranormal Research Club'. For those of you who aren't familiar with it, might I recommend reading "The Haunting: A Love Story" after? You won't regret it :D
Last edited by Megumeru on Tue Nov 18, 2014 3:19 pm, edited 4 times in total.
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They say they hate Shizune? What is this? BLASPHEMY!

SHII-HAEL!
Shizune>Rin>Emi>Hanako>Lilly
"A writer is a light that reveals the world of his story from darkness. Shapes it from nothingness. If the writer stops, the world dies with it." - Alan Wake
Yes, I write stories. Currently working on: The Haunting: A Love Story

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brythain
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Re: From the Files of the Paranormal Research Club

Post by brythain » Fri Oct 31, 2014 6:42 am

An excellent read! I enjoyed myself very much.

Then I told myself a creepy little joke… Yes, you have four corners, but there are FIVE sets of routes in KS. Haha!

Also, clearly a pseudo-route:
“I’m guessing she’s on her route!” Yuuko whispers with a slight bit of enthusiasm. “We should start checking her route and see if we can document her.”
Thanks for that cheerfully ghostly piece of writing! :)
Post-Yamaku, what happens? After The Dream is a mosaic that follows everyone to the (sometimes) bitter end.
Main Index (Complete)Shizune/Lilly/Emi/Hanako/Rin/Misha + Miki + Natsume
Secondary Arcs: Rika/Mutou/AkiraHideaki | Others (WIP): Straw—A Dream of SuzuSakura—The Kenji Saga.
"Much has been lost, and there is much left to lose." — Tim Powers, The Drawing of the Dark (1979)

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Megumeru
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Re: From the Files of the Paranormal Research Club

Post by Megumeru » Fri Oct 31, 2014 12:37 pm

brythain wrote: Also, clearly a pseudo-route:
“I’m guessing she’s on her route!” Yuuko whispers with a slight bit of enthusiasm. “We should start checking her route and see if we can document her.”
Wow I didn't think anyone would catch that :shock:

well done! And, thank you :D
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They say they hate Shizune? What is this? BLASPHEMY!

SHII-HAEL!
Shizune>Rin>Emi>Hanako>Lilly
"A writer is a light that reveals the world of his story from darkness. Shapes it from nothingness. If the writer stops, the world dies with it." - Alan Wake
Yes, I write stories. Currently working on: The Haunting: A Love Story

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AntonSlavik020
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Re: There were Five

Post by AntonSlavik020 » Sun Nov 02, 2014 10:20 am

Very enjoyable. Love creepy things in general, and this was well done. I initially thought Yuuko was the one from the game, but besides that initial confusion, well done.
Best girl
Hanako=Shizune>Misha>Lilly>Rin>Emi

Best route
Hanako>Lilly>Rin>Emi>Shizune

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Megumeru
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Re: There were Five

Post by Megumeru » Mon Nov 03, 2014 3:44 am

AntonSlavik020 wrote:Very enjoyable. Love creepy things in general, and this was well done. I initially thought Yuuko was the one from the game, but besides that initial confusion, well done.
Thank you for reading! I'm glad you enjoyed it :D

Yes, the name may be confusing at first, but when written in Kanji they are distinctively different--means different too. I based this Yuuko on Meibi's Tasogare x Otome so it actually has a lot more semblance to her--like a shout-out, to say.'Hanekawa Yuuko' is written as 「羽川夕子」; the Kanji 'yuu' meant singularly 'Dusk/Evening'. Shirakawa Yuuko is written as 「白川優子」, with the Kanji 'kind/gentle'.

You can say that this Yuuko is basically the 'Child of Dusk', while KS's Yuuko is the 'Child of Kindness'.


If curious, I come up with her family name after plucking with Shizune's family name and Yuuko's by accident in a random name roulette :lol:
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They say they hate Shizune? What is this? BLASPHEMY!

SHII-HAEL!
Shizune>Rin>Emi>Hanako>Lilly
"A writer is a light that reveals the world of his story from darkness. Shapes it from nothingness. If the writer stops, the world dies with it." - Alan Wake
Yes, I write stories. Currently working on: The Haunting: A Love Story

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Mirage_GSM
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Re: There were Five (One-Shot)

Post by Mirage_GSM » Mon Nov 03, 2014 4:49 pm

Very nice story. I enjoyed it, but it seemed a bit less polished usual. There are a lot of minor grammar mistakes that are normally absent from your writing.

Also, since the party consists of two presidents and two vice-presidents your constant use of titles instead of names can become confusing at times...
“No flashlights…!” Yuuko remarks, “We need the perfect condition for ‘Kawano’ to show herself!”
Traipsing around in near total darkness has to be very... uncomfortable for Shizune...
As our objective is to document the existence of ‘Kawano’; or debunk it if no proof are documented
A weird way for a paranormal researcher to think. Usually they are the first to point out that absence of evidence does not equal evidence of absence. :-)
Emi > Misha > Hanako > Lilly > Rin > Shizune

My collected KS-Fan Fictions: Mirage's Myths
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Megumeru
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Joined: Wed Feb 08, 2012 10:17 am
Location: Land of the Rising Sun

Re: There were Five (One-Shot)

Post by Megumeru » Sat Nov 08, 2014 9:24 am

sorry for the late reply, been a bit busy :)
Mirage_GSM wrote:Very nice story. I enjoyed it, but it seemed a bit less polished usual. There are a lot of minor grammar mistakes that are normally absent from your writing.

Also, since the party consists of two presidents and two vice-presidents your constant use of titles instead of names can become confusing at times...
Ah, I sincerely apologize for that^^;

To be honest, I was writing this in...3-4 hours in the middle of me working on a paper (yes, it is kinda rushed). Once I have the time again, I'll get fixing on the errors :)
“No flashlights…!” Yuuko remarks, “We need the perfect condition for ‘Kawano’ to show herself!”
Traipsing around in near total darkness has to be very... uncomfortable for Shizune...
It is, I believe--I have another story in mind that I'm planning to write after I'm finished with 'The Haunting that might touch this subject :)

Then again, Shizune did volunteered and took Hisao along on the journey :lol:
As our objective is to document the existence of ‘Kawano’; or debunk it if no proof are documented
A weird way for a paranormal researcher to think. Usually they are the first to point out that absence of evidence does not equal evidence of absence. :-)
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They are amateurs, after all :D

The 'evidence' they had at first was the statements and reports from the staff--as well as the ghost story that revolves in Yamaku High from student to student, so that is the basis of their investigation :)
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They say they hate Shizune? What is this? BLASPHEMY!

SHII-HAEL!
Shizune>Rin>Emi>Hanako>Lilly
"A writer is a light that reveals the world of his story from darkness. Shapes it from nothingness. If the writer stops, the world dies with it." - Alan Wake
Yes, I write stories. Currently working on: The Haunting: A Love Story

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