Bugger It, Oneshot Thread (Morse Update 10/4/16)

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Silentcook
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Re: Bugger It, I'll Make This A Oneshot Thread

Post by Silentcook » Fri Apr 04, 2014 12:49 pm

NekoDude wrote:But if you're going to decide one or more of these are "over the line" then it needs to be set out in writing. It's not just to prevent people from deliberately being asshats. Some of us really do think things like this are funny and don't hesitate to use them when we think they fit. Other times, it just gets the job done faster and more effectively than trying to toe the line.
No, it really doesn't, and here's why.

First, a hypothetical list of "over the line" stuff would magically go... mostly unnoticed. That's what happens to lists and rules here, if my experience is any judge.

Regardless of the above, those don't prevent people from being asshats, deliberately or otherwise; they just plant an asshattery flag to mark territory, which is a double-edged sword. Considering how low our QUALITY bar is set, we'd rather hope for people to have a modicum of common sense and deal with cases as and if they appear, than try to set a line to toe in the gutter.

Notice that in our current case I'm not taking issue with the content (much), but rather with the facts that this would make no sense to random unsuspecting people who just happened to wander in and that this kind of thing could be cranked out within fifteen minutes by pretty much anybody.

Since I don't know what people are assuming, I'd also like to point out that nothing happened in this case, my previous post aside. No warnings or bans were given. :?:
NekoDude wrote:It takes time, and if enabling the growth of writers is outside your scope, that too should be laid out up front.
We absolutely don't mind if that happens in the process, but we're also most definitely not a forum dedicated to learning writers. Our express intent here is not to teach people how to write, or to draw, or to compose, or to code, or to VN - for one thing, we don't think we are qualified to do that as the amateurs we are, and for another, many of us have no interest in doing it. Our express intent is also not a lot of other things, but we're not gonna write up a thousand things that are not okay when we have already written the one or two that are okay.


Semi-relatedly to the discussion, here's something that happened relatively recently in my country: parts of an art exhibit made out of materials usually considered garbage actually got thrown out with the garbage. I think this says a lot. Links available but rigorously in Italian so far, PM me if interested, if you dare to shit up the thread I'm gonna smack you. >:(
brythain wrote:This looks as if it could be moving to the Fan Works or Public Discussion level.
This man(?) speaks truth. PROCEED. :twisted:
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Re: Bugger It, I'll Make This A Oneshot Thread

Post by HarvestmanMan » Wed Apr 09, 2014 11:58 am

Munchenhausen is a literary god(dess). If John Steinbeck or Ayn Rand tried to write KS fanfics, they'd have this to beat.

(S)He also works a phone keyboard far better than I ever could.
Current Number of Fanfics Cooked: 2

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Re: Bugger It, I'll Make This A Oneshot Thread

Post by Munchenhausen » Fri Apr 11, 2014 7:00 am

I dunno about you guys, but I like to think there's a cat that lives in the girl's dorm, kept a big secret by everyone who lives there.
Cat gets free food and attention, the girls get a pet cat.
Win:Win


Fatso the Fatarsed Cat
"Awwwwh~! He's so cuuuuuuute!"
The epileptic resident of the Yamaku Girl's dorm spins around in the dormitory corridor, holding a rather plump cat at arm's length. Although the cat's face is one of complete hatred, it purrs at the attention.
"Can we keep him?"

Natsume gives the cat, now tucked in a hug, a quick look over. It doesn't look too bad... A little fat, but it otherwise seems alright. "Oh, alright," She giggles at the poor thing in its vice-like cuddle and nods. "But you do realise cats aren't allowed here?".

Naomi spins the cat around to face her and nuzzles its grumpy little face. "That's okay, we'll just keep him a secret. Top secret." Natsume peers over her glasses at her blonde friend accusingly. 'Oh, you're one to talk...' Naomi isn't exactly known for being subtle.

Where did the cat come from?
Neither girl knows, nor do they really care. All that's certain is a fat tabby cat was waltzing the corridors like he owned the place. Pets aren't allowed on school grounds, not even guide dogs. Too many risks for students with pulmonary problems or allergies. However, this may well be the reason the girls instantly fell in love with the stumpy little feline. Its porky physique mixed with its grumpy complexion make it, in their eyes, well worth the risk.

The girls are discussing possible names when the feline wriggles from Naomi's arms and walks, almost mockingly, through the closest open door. Before she can even swear, a scream resonates from inside Miki's room... but gradually soothes into an infatuated squeal. Natsume and Naomi share a concerned glance to the sound of frantic skittering, fumbling and mumbled threats. Eventually, a tanned athlete emerges from the room with a victorious smile on her face and an obviously exhausted cat slumped on her open palm, its legs dangling freely. Miki only needs to see the guilty expressions of the two before her to understand what's going on.
"I believe this is yours?"

Naomi drops to her knees and begins pleading "Pleasepleasepleasedonttellanyone!"
She gasps for breath before continuing "It's not ours but we found him and he was just walking around and... and... Look at his widdle face!"
Miki humours her and turns her hand to make the cat face her. She's right, his face certainly has an adorable little pout to it. Truth be told, Miki had made up her mind from the moment she pinned the furry blob with her stump to catch it.

"Have you named it?"

Natsume pulls her blonde friend from the floor and thinks for a second. "We were thinking Tsakuda? Or maybe Fluffy?"

"Nah, they're stupid names. We're calling him Fatso," Miki smirks at her hostage's chub spilling over the sides of her hand.

"Fatso? That's a little mean..."

"Well I guess I can just take him to the glorious Dictator Hakamichi-"

"No!" Naomi lunges and snatches the newly named cat from Miki's good hand, "We can call him Fatso!"

Natsume nods in agreement. "Fatso it is."

A few silent seconds pass as the three simultaniously think of what to do next, when Fatso decides he's had enough holding for one day. He begins flailing and writhing before jumping on his captor's head and gracefully soaring through the air over Miki, seemingly defying the laws of physics. Fatso lands softly on his feet and trots off down the corridor, leaving the trio speechless and now bored.

From that day forwards, nobody at Yamaku would live a normal life. Nobody could expect what frivolity and hardship a chubby little cat could bring to the dormatories.
Nobody but Kenji.

So begins the legend of Fatso, the Fatarsed Cat

I really had no idea how to finish this one. it's been sitting in my files for a few months now.
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Last edited by Munchenhausen on Fri Jul 31, 2015 7:29 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Like stupid, silly doodles with no point? You've come to the right place, friend :^)
I also occasionally write oneshots. Why not have a skimread?
Miki fic? Miki fic!
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Re: Bugger It, I'll Make This A Oneshot Thread (Fatso Update

Post by FelOnyx » Fri Apr 11, 2014 3:37 pm

When I first saw the title, I was expecting something about Taro. Probably for the best that it wasn't.
AlexG wrote:For a moment there I thought Marx woke up as some kind of stripper in the middle ages
BlackGoldShooter wrote:This is what happens when children don't eat their vegetables. First they start manufacturing statuettes. Next they take over the world.

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Re: Bugger It, I'll Make This A Oneshot Thread (Fatso Update

Post by Atario » Fri Apr 11, 2014 11:32 pm

"What did you say, Nyanomi?"
NB: none of the above is a request

Mutou Gets Fired — a little one-shot fanfic I wrote

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Re: Bugger It, I'll Make This A Oneshot Thread (Fatso Update

Post by TyronePotato » Wed May 07, 2014 8:49 am

These are just way too good. Keep them coming, please.

Also that one about Lilly's father was pretty amazing.
ooooh feels.

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Re: Bugger It, I'll Make This A Oneshot Thread (Fatso Update

Post by Munchenhausen » Thu May 08, 2014 2:43 am

So I thought I'd try something a little more serious.
Please don't hurt me.

(Thanks a bunch to forgetmenot, for helping me out with this :) it'd be shit otherwise)
---

Ringing
He's been growing on Molly, recently.

Sure, he's stubborn and temperamental, with a frustrating tendency to flip on a coin's edge... but he has his reasons. 

Starting out, he was quite an unlikable person to most. In her first few months after transferring to Yamaku, Molly's only knowledge of him was when he would lose his temper in class and storm out, or shout at Misha for laughing too loudly again.

But once you understand what Tinnitus consists of; in his case a constant, intrusive ringing in both of his ears, you start to sympathise. 

You know why he hates loud noises, when you know how much it makes the symptoms worse. You know why he hates quiet places, when you know how much the ringing stands out to him. You know why he's always angry, when you know the irritation never stops.

You know how much he will enjoy a soft conversation on the roof, when you know you're the only one who seems to put up with him.

The two sit on the roof of the school, far past curfew, watching the sun set over the mountain. She looks over to him. His eyes are closed, head back against the mesh fence, a genuine smile on his face. She tentatively grazes her hand against his and he comes to his senses. Takashi looks down, and with another smile, he rests his hand on her own and gives it a gentle squeeze.

You know how much he appreciates someone to talk to, when you realise you're the only one who will.
Like stupid, silly doodles with no point? You've come to the right place, friend :^)
I also occasionally write oneshots. Why not have a skimread?
Miki fic? Miki fic!
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"We are a small country full of the most stubborn bastards on the planet. You might want to rethink your actions." - Anon

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Re: Bugger It, I'll Make This A Oneshot Thread (Ringing 8/5/

Post by TyronePotato » Thu May 08, 2014 7:39 am

D,aaawwww
Nice, I loved it
ooooh feels.

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Re: Bugger It, I'll Make This A Oneshot Thread (Ringing 8/5/

Post by Comrade » Thu May 08, 2014 8:01 am

Awwwwn thats so sweet~
To compensate,your next one better have civilian casulties :evil:
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Re: Bugger It, I'll Make This A Oneshot Thread (Ringing 8/5/

Post by FelOnyx » Thu May 08, 2014 8:05 am

That was actually good, and not a single bad joke in sight. I did not know it was possible.

Basicly, what I'm saying is that this piece has a nice ring to it.
AlexG wrote:For a moment there I thought Marx woke up as some kind of stripper in the middle ages
BlackGoldShooter wrote:This is what happens when children don't eat their vegetables. First they start manufacturing statuettes. Next they take over the world.

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Re: Bugger It, I'll Make This A Oneshot Thread (Ringing 8/5/

Post by Comrade » Thu May 08, 2014 8:07 am

FelOnyx wrote:
Basicly, what I'm saying is that this piece has a nice ring to it.
That rings a bell...
Founder and cheif librarian ofThe Yamaku Library, A Fan Fiction Archive
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Sea wrote:Comrade, as Khan Bek has convinced me to give Democracy a try.
"French are just Spanish Germans, therefore Mexicans."
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Re: Bugger It, I'll Make This A Oneshot Thread (Ringing 8/5/

Post by AntonSlavik020 » Thu May 08, 2014 9:39 am

That was sweet. The fact that it was Molly just made it better.
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Hanako=Shizune>Misha>Lilly>Rin>Emi

Best route
Hanako>Lilly>Rin>Emi>Shizune

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Re: Bugger It, I'll Make This A Oneshot Thread (Ringing 8/5/

Post by d2r » Thu May 08, 2014 10:24 am

I liked it. It's just the right length & provides a well-thought out portrait of...damn it, I can never remember the Tinnitus guy's name. :p

If I had to make a critique, I'd say you weren't quite consistent with the tenses: it's mostly in second-person, but you occasionally shift to third-person "Molly" and to "she", making it unclear if the narrator IS Molly, or an unidentified third party. If you're looking for improvement, I'd start there. Again, though, solid work overall.
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Re: Bugger It, I'll Make This A Oneshot Thread (Ringing 8/5/

Post by Mirage_GSM » Thu May 08, 2014 11:14 am

A prime example of how length isn't important at all.
Very nice story, but I agree that you should replace all the "you" with ""she" or "her" as appropriate to keep the narrative mode more consistent.
Emi > Misha > Hanako > Lilly > Rin > Shizune

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Re: Bugger It, I'll Make This A Oneshot Thread (Ringing 8/5/

Post by monkeywitha6pack » Thu May 08, 2014 11:39 am

That was very good. To go along with mirage, you were able to show a meaning full story that was a paragraph long and it elected feelings from the people who read it.
Wahahaha~.
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