Re: Learning To Fly - A Saki pseudo-route (Updated 5/18)
Posted: Sat May 20, 2017 10:18 pm
Thank you so much for the positive feedback on this chapter - it means a lot. I'm not going to lie; I was really nervous about this chapter because of the subject matter, and you never know how people will react to what can be a very touchy subject. This isn't the only time this type of thing will be brought up in the story, so I'm honestly really relieved. It was also a reveal I was trying to set up since I started writing this story. The conversation between Saki and Hisao was one of the first things I wrote for this story, years ago...(holy hell has it been that long?)
I also was trying very hard to avoid a pitfall like having Saki's backstory turn into the "typical" overachiever/castaway complex. This is the truth of Saki's situation as Saki sees it. I love how the VN had a few similar moments not just with Hisao but with the girls as well. It gives me a lot of confidence moving forward You guys are the best!
Now for more detailed replies!
Now for my next challenge...the smut!
I also was trying very hard to avoid a pitfall like having Saki's backstory turn into the "typical" overachiever/castaway complex. This is the truth of Saki's situation as Saki sees it. I love how the VN had a few similar moments not just with Hisao but with the girls as well. It gives me a lot of confidence moving forward You guys are the best!
Now for more detailed replies!
In the words of Fry: It took hours to write, I thought it would take hours to read! Seriously though, I'll add a little padding to it when I get home tonight!...and one thing that does not quite work out with the succession of events in the last part:
After the two pairs seperate, tey walk for "a few minutes" and then have that conversation that lasts until Saki notices Chisato's text. Somewhere you need to put in more time-padding, because there's no way this conversation lasted so long they missed their bus
I don't know much about traffic in Japan, so I ended up going off of personal experience from my time as a driver here in the States. Whenever a truck gets into an accident and dumps anything hazardous, it's pretty common to shut the freeway down for a few hours. Happens a LOT where I live because my city is a major transportation hub.As for traffic jams in Japan... I didn't use the motorways much when I was there, but the few times my colleagues took me on trips I've found them to be virtually empty. I thought it was because a) it costs money to use them and b) public transit is more efficient to get almost anywhere.
It's possible that I just got lucky with the times, though.
I hope I can keep it up!Zerebos wrote:Another great chapter man. This one was really deep, our first time really getting a look at Saki's past and it definitely struck a chord with me. The description of everything surrounding her past was so accurate and vivid, just incredible work Eurobeat!
That's an amazing compliment! Thank you! I just wish it didn't take four months to push this one out. Not as long for the next one, I promise! My goal is to get Act 3 done by the end of the year at the latest.AlexFDSR wrote:Wow, Hisao. She had to outright tell you so you'd figure it out?
Anyway, loved this chapter. Glad to see you still write this fic, especially after all that's transpired since you started. One of the best things about you, apart from the superb writing, is your diligence.
I am so happy that you had that reaction. I was scared that the reveal wouldn't be convincing.The moment the wristband was coming off... it all clicked together of stuff I remember reading about. It was something that you could sense was coming but when it did... right there you just want to hug Saki and never let her go.
Now for my next challenge...the smut!