Pseudodrabbles

WORDS WORDS WORDS


Recidivism
Posts: 19
Joined: Sat Oct 26, 2013 11:15 am

Pseudodrabbles

Post by Recidivism »

I need to write something that isn't my NaNoWriMo project right now, I have an idea, so let's go. This probably isn't going to be exactly 100 words, thus "Pseudo"drabble.

It's been a few months since we graduated from Yamaku. Hanako and I were fortunate enough to get to go to the same university, but our studies have still kept us busy enough that we could stand some more time together. We still make an effort to do things together, but it isn't like we're going to die if we're separated. Days like this are more than welcome, however. Today is a typical Sunday morning in the Fall, not anything out of the ordinary. I look over at Hanako, who is sleeping beside me. I don't feel like I could fall back asleep if I tried, but I put an arm around Hanako anyway, close my eyes, and enjoy the peace.
User avatar
Sea
Posts: 778
Joined: Tue Jul 02, 2013 10:07 am
Location: Toronto

Re: Hanako Pseudodrabble

Post by Sea »

I'm trying to be offput by it's shortness but I can't. Well done, It has all the feels in one small paragraph that other fics take chapters to get to. Keep up the drabbles, you can have a cage match with bhtoofer.
Come join the Yamaku Book Club! Where stuff happens and we discuss cripple porn
I come from the outside, do you know it?
Comrade
Posts: 1248
Joined: Wed Dec 12, 2012 9:29 am
Location: Micheal Levi's lyre is real good yo

Re: Hanako Pseudodrabble

Post by Comrade »

Well, i can't really see the point of this.
Founder and cheif librarian ofThe Yamaku Library, A Fan Fiction Archive
Vice president of the Yamaku Book Club
Sea wrote:Comrade, as Khan Bek has convinced me to give Democracy a try.
"French are just Spanish Germans, therefore Mexicans."
An American, 2014
bhtooefr
Posts: 1353
Joined: Thu Sep 19, 2013 5:20 pm
Location: Newark, OH
Contact:

Re: Hanako Pseudodrabble

Post by bhtooefr »

Sea wrote:Keep up the drabbles, you can have a cage match with bhtoofer.
Themocaw is well in the lead with the whole drabble thing, between Five Drabbles, Post-Hisao (which may have been the inspiration for my drabbles) and Ten Drabbles in the Life of Akira Satou.
bhtooefr's one-shot and drabble thread
Enjoy The Silence - Sequel to All I Have (complete)
Enough is enough! I have had it with these motherfucking zombies on this motherfucking forum!
Mahorfeus
Posts: 682
Joined: Wed Jan 18, 2012 12:16 pm

Re: Hanako Pseudodrabble

Post by Mahorfeus »

It seems a little less like a drabble and more like a summary of a story.
"A very small degree of hope is sufficient to cause the birth of love." -Stendhal
Recidivism
Posts: 19
Joined: Sat Oct 26, 2013 11:15 am

Re: Hanako Pseudodrabble

Post by Recidivism »

Well, i can't really see the point of this.
There is no point. Isn't it lovely?
User avatar
Mournful3ch0
Posts: 108
Joined: Sun Sep 22, 2013 5:37 pm
Location: Various Particles Strewn Throughout The Ionosphere

Re: Hanako Pseudodrabble

Post by Mournful3ch0 »

Recidivism wrote:
Well, i can't really see the point of this.
There is no point. Isn't it lovely?
Positively! :D

Image

y pls
Image "Forsooth, that line was feeble." - Courtesy of Mirage_GSM
Image "It occurs to me that maybe I’m an idiot." - Thanks to Jaspirian
Image
Recidivism
Posts: 19
Joined: Sat Oct 26, 2013 11:15 am

Re: Hanako Pseudodrabble

Post by Recidivism »

If I really want to write something different again soon, I might write something short about an idea I had recently that heavily involves Misha.
User avatar
sanduba
Posts: 96
Joined: Sun Oct 20, 2013 12:52 am
Location: Titan, moon of Saturn

Re: Hanako Pseudodrabble

Post by sanduba »

commenting so I'll see if more come out. sounds promising
Best story:
Hanako > Rin > Lilly > Emi > Shizune

best girl:
Lilly > Shizune > Emi > Hanako > Rin

Eh, that's my opinion.
bhtooefr
Posts: 1353
Joined: Thu Sep 19, 2013 5:20 pm
Location: Newark, OH
Contact:

Re: Hanako Pseudodrabble

Post by bhtooefr »

There's a link for that.

Image
bhtooefr's one-shot and drabble thread
Enjoy The Silence - Sequel to All I Have (complete)
Enough is enough! I have had it with these motherfucking zombies on this motherfucking forum!
User avatar
sanduba
Posts: 96
Joined: Sun Oct 20, 2013 12:52 am
Location: Titan, moon of Saturn

Re: Hanako Pseudodrabble

Post by sanduba »

really? lol, never noticed, sorry :P
Best story:
Hanako > Rin > Lilly > Emi > Shizune

best girl:
Lilly > Shizune > Emi > Hanako > Rin

Eh, that's my opinion.
Recidivism
Posts: 19
Joined: Sat Oct 26, 2013 11:15 am

Fuck you, Hisao Nakai.

Post by Recidivism »

I stare at the assortment of pills in front of me, like every night before this one. Tonight is different. Tonight is the last time I'll take these. I try to put a finger on when exactly I decided that I should go through with this. It wasn't something that I gave a lot of thought to, until just now. Every day since I've arrived at Yamaku I've found myself pushing away more and more people who only wanted to help me. I had a chance for a new start, and I wasted it already. I pushed away Iwanako and all of my old friends in the hospital, and now I pushed away Shizune and Misha, Lilly probably thinks I hate her by now, Hanako is avoiding me even more than anyone else, I blew off Emi, and I don't think Rin ever cared in the first place. I'm alone. I can't help but smile, partially because it's almost over and partially because I feel like I deserve it. I pull out my phone and send a single text message to the first number I recall, Misha's. It's only one word, "Goodbye." I choose a dosage of one pill that I'm certain will end me quickly and take them. I look at man in the mirror for a second. You did a really nice job. Fuck you, Hisao Nakai.


Yeah, that's not it. I'm doing a second part soon. Just hold on for a short while.
Leaty
Posts: 515
Joined: Wed May 09, 2012 9:18 pm
Location: Exile

Re: Fuck you, Hisao Nakai.

Post by Leaty »

No offense, but I feel like this wasn't quality controlled whatsoever. It looks like you just hammered out two hundred words and posted them immediately without giving it any thought. There's no explanation of what exactly this is, or what you're trying to do here, and there was no indication in the thread title what I'd find inside. It could have been goatse for all I knew.

What is it you're trying to do here? Are you trying to entertain an audience? Are you trying to improve your writing skills? Are you trying to explore the structure of the plot of Katawa Shoujo in an innovative way? I have no idea how you want people to respond to this. To me, it's a paragraph about Hisao wanting to kill himself. Okay then.

This board isn't going anywhere. When I see something like this that essentially amounts to a non sequitur in written form, it makes me think that the poster was lazy and wanted instant gratification without actually putting in very much effort. Believe me, this board is cluttered enough with all the suddenly deleted fanfics that float on the top of the board like so much flotsam.
User avatar
Mournful3ch0
Posts: 108
Joined: Sun Sep 22, 2013 5:37 pm
Location: Various Particles Strewn Throughout The Ionosphere

Re: Fuck you, Hisao Nakai.

Post by Mournful3ch0 »

You're not a Doomish alt account, are you? ;)

Ah, kidding. Very short and sw... er, grim.

Edit: Idiocy removed. Continue on.

Cheers!
Last edited by Mournful3ch0 on Thu Nov 07, 2013 7:06 am, edited 1 time in total.
Image "Forsooth, that line was feeble." - Courtesy of Mirage_GSM
Image "It occurs to me that maybe I’m an idiot." - Thanks to Jaspirian
Image
Recidivism
Posts: 19
Joined: Sat Oct 26, 2013 11:15 am

Re: Fuck you, Hisao Nakai.

Post by Recidivism »

Leaty wrote:No offense, but I feel like this wasn't quality controlled whatsoever. It looks like you just hammered out two hundred words and posted them immediately without giving it any thought. There's no explanation of what exactly this is, or what you're trying to do here, and there was no indication in the thread title what I'd find inside. It could have been goatse for all I knew.

What is it you're trying to do here? Are you trying to entertain an audience? Are you trying to improve your writing skills? Are you trying to explore the structure of the plot of Katawa Shoujo in an innovative way? I have no idea how you want people to respond to this. To me, it's a paragraph about Hisao wanting to kill himself. Okay then.

This board isn't going anywhere. When I see something like this that essentially amounts to a non sequitur in written form, it makes me think that the poster was lazy and wanted instant gratification without actually putting in very much effort. Believe me, this board is cluttered enough with all the suddenly deleted fanfics that float on the top of the board like so much flotsam.
That's actually exactly what I did. I was bored and I wanted to do this, and then I'm going to do more with this. I do a lot of writing without actually planning out what I'm going to do without much more than a vague outline in my head.
Post Reply