Blossom - A Miki pseudo-route [Development Halted]

WORDS WORDS WORDS
Post Reply
User avatar
Numb
Posts: 225
Joined: Thu Jul 11, 2013 8:29 am
Location: In a chair behind a desk. Always.

Blossom - A Miki pseudo-route [Development Halted]

Post by Numb » Fri Sep 06, 2013 8:04 pm

So, I decided that even if I think I will fall victim to the Miki curse, I will post my attempt at her route. I will be writing the next chapter straight after this goes up, but I might not update the thread straight away.

I have wanted to do a pseudo-route ever since finishing the game a month and a half ago. I know already how difficult this will be to finish, the notes alone took around eight days to perfect. Don't worry though, I have the plot all planned out, the only thing the curse can do to me is cut off my inspiration, which I doubt will happen any time soon! :D

Table of contents

Act One

Chapter One: Meet Miki
This Post

Chapter Two: The Shanghai
Part One
Part Two

Chapter Three: Switching Tracks
Part One
Part Two

Chapter Four: Cityscape
Part One
Part Two

Chapter Five: Trinity
Part One
Part Two
Part Three

Chapter Six: Faculty Favours
Part One

Chapter Seven: Running Late
Part One
Part Two

Chapter Eight: Yamaku Festival
Part One
Part Two
Part Three


Act Two
Image

Chapter One: Space-time Out
Part One
Part Two
Part Three






















The story starts on the morning of 'Cold War', as Hisao leaves the dorms to head to class

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
[Music Cue: School Days]

I head out of the dormitories and start towards the main entrance. My legs are aching after that run with Emi this morning, and my brain hurts slightly. Kenji interrupting my shower was not a pleasant experience, and now I am a few hundred yen poorer. At least it’s a nice day outside today, one I won’t be able to experience until after class.

Right. Class. I need to go there now.

I manage to join the usual morning crowd on their way out of the cafeteria, but decide to hang back a little bit. Despite the large halls and the strict regulations, I still get bumped around a fair bit in that mass, and I don’t think that is good for my heart.

I head to the nearest vending machine, I need coffee right now if anything else. This morning has been… eventful.

The can falls from the machine with the usual clunk, opens with a click and a hiss, and empties into my gullet. Ah, coffee. The highschoolers best friend.

Crap. Class. I only have ten minutes left before I am late!

I see a girl from my class up ahead, maybe I can follow her there. She turns into the stairwell, and I climb up with her. She seems to be taking her time, maybe she has some kind of bone problem? She does have that knee brace on…

[Music Cue: High Tension]

She starts pitching forward. I run up the stairs, closing the gap between us faster than I thought would be possible. I didn’t move this quickly with Emi this morning. Her head hits my arm, but I manage to catch her.

I wonder if I should take her to a nurse? Then again, if this is normal for her, I might end up wasting time. I should just carry her to class and see what people say.

[Music Cue: School Days]

I sling the girl over my shoulders. I can’t remember her name, if I ever learned it, but she seemed like a nice person. Maybe a little lazy, I saw her sleeping in class all day yesterday, but a nice person nonetheless. She isn’t heavy either, something I am grateful of.

We reach the top of the stairs before I have to stop and take a break. I am really out of shape, maybe Nurse was right when he said I should exercise. Wait, of course he was right, he is a medical professional, even if he doesn’t act like it sometimes.

The girl on my shoulder stirrs a little, but she doesn’t wake up. Am I supposed to wake her up if this happens? Yamaku really is a confusing place…

I glance at my watch again. Five minutes, but we are just down the hall now, so we can make it. I readjust myself, and the girl, and start towards the door. Class 3-3, here we are. Now, how do I open this without dropping-

[Music Cue: Hokabi]

“Oh thank God, there she is! Usually she gets here by now and-“

I am met by a girl with long dark hair. I think her name is Miura, though I can’t be sure. I don’t want to appear rude though, so I just give her a smile.

“Oh, hey. You’re the new kid right? Heh, probably a little confused right now, Suzu here has narcolepsy-”

Oh. That explains it.

“-so don’t think anything of it if she falls asleep on you. So, where did you catch her?”

Wait, what does she mean “don’t think anything of it”?

“Uh, on the stairs. What do you mean-“

“Did you actually catch her, or did you just pick her up and drag her to class? She has done this before you know, that’s why she has that brace.”

“I caught her, don’t worry. She is pretty light. Nakai by the way, and you are Miura, right?”

“Nah, just Miki, surnames suck, they’re too stuffy.”

“Then it’s Hisao. You said this was Suzu, right?”

I nudge the girl on my shoulder a little in an attempt to point her out without using my arms.

“Yeah, Suzu Suzuki. I like to call her Snoozu, but only I get away with that, got it?”

Wow, she actually looks threatening right now. I don’t think I want to know what happens when Miki gets angry, so I will steer clear of that for a while. I nod.

“Good, now, let me help you out a little.”

She leans down, putting her lips to Suzu’s ear, and whispers

“Snoozu, come back to the land of the living. I caught you a boy!”

What?!

“Wait, what? What do you mean you caught her a boy? You didn’t catch me, I caught her and-

“Hrnng…”

That worked? Wait, I’m so confused, how did that work?

“Uh, mornin’… Miki, who is this and why am I asleep on him?”

“That, my little princess, would be Hisao. Would you like to thank him for saving you from the big bad stairs?”

What just happened? Miki has completely changed, not ten seconds ago was she acting all casual, now she is acting like a mother with her toddler. I wonder if she and Suzu are always like this?

“What? Oh, stairs… Yeah, thanks Hisao. I am forever in your debt and all that other stuff… Can I go back to sleep? Your shoulder is comfy.”

Well, thanks for that, but- Wait, what?

“Oh man Hisao, I think she likes you!”

Miki flashes me a grin and winks. I can feel the blood rushing to my cheeks, Suzu probably can too considering she is pretty much using me as a bed.

“Sorry Suzu, class is about to start, he can’t stand here and let you sleep on him, Hisao probably needs to catch up on some work. Maybe some other time.”

Damn you Miki. I will get you for this.


[Music Cue: School Days]

Mutou drones on, talking about the basics of string theory. I read a few books on that while in hospital, so I think I can afford to space out just this once. Something catches my attention in the corner of my eye. Miki turns and grins at me, then tosses a small, folded piece of paper at me when Mutou isn’t looking.

“Talk after class, I have something important to tell you. Super secret, so eat this message after you memorise it!”

I glance at her again, then back at the note. I consider humouring her and actually eating the note, but I don’t think that would be healthy. I just stare at her until she has to stiffle a giggle. She composes herself quickly, but shoots me an inquiring look. Oh, right, talking after class. I nod, I kind of want to see what she wants.


[Music Cue: Hokabi]

The rest of class passes by uneventfully, Mutou being cut short by the lunchtime bell again. No sooner do I collect my things than a hand… a stump, lands on my shoulder. Miki.

“Don’t try to bail on us already Hisao! Remember, I need to talk to you?”

Bail on you? I was just collecting my things…
“What? Why would I be leaving? I haven’t even planned anything for lunch yet, so I was in no hurry.”

She shrugs, clearly indifferent to the whole misunderstanding, if it even qualifies as one.

“Well, maybe we can be your plans. Suzu and I that is. We usually eat in here, but since you are new here, we thought we would jazz things up a little. So you are coming with us to the one, the only, the Shanghai!”

…The what?

“Uh, where exactly is this place?”

“In town, don’t worry, we have plenty of time to get there. We might not make it back, but who cares? It’s only math, and math is boring as hell!”

I get the feeling Miki doesn’t like math. I won’t lie, I’m not too fond of it either, so this is a great excuse to miss it.

“Don’t worry Hisao, we can say Suzu fell asleep somewhere and we couldn’t wake her up. She is a great cover story, ain’t that right Snoozu?”

Only now do I notice the short, blue haired girl behind Miki. She seems to just appear, never making an actual entrance.

“Miki, shut up… I need coffee, can we go get some?”

“Coffee actually sounds good, I need to wake up again after that lecture, kind of spaced out and now I feel tired.”

We head out of the classroom and down the hall. Suzu holds on to Miki’s arm, probably as a precaution. It’s kind of nice seeing these two together, they treat each other like sisters. Miki is the older sister that always looks out for little Suzu, and Suzu is the little sister who falls asleep a lot.

We grab our coffee and head out of the main entrance, through the gates and start to head down the hill to town.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Next
Note: I am aware this isn't of higher quality right now, it is currently 1AM here in the UK and I can feel my brain slowly turning into soup. Hopefully the next chapter is of a better standard, we shall see.
As always, constructive criticism is welcome! :D
Last edited by Numb on Fri Jan 17, 2014 1:03 pm, edited 27 times in total.
Currently working on: Notes for a new project (Coming Soon™)
I did KS and other songs on note blocks in Minecraft: Playlist here
Old works| Rooftops - An Emi Story| Christmas with the Hakamichis | Not Like Him - Rin Perspective|Blossom - A Miki pseudo-route

User avatar
Loeloe95
Posts: 20
Joined: Mon Mar 18, 2013 1:10 am

Re: Blossom - A Miki pseudo-route [First Chapter 07/09/2013]

Post by Loeloe95 » Fri Sep 06, 2013 9:05 pm

I like it. And good luck with the curse bud, you're gonna need it.
Also it's funny how Miki and Suzu together are just accepted as cannon on the forums at this point. :)
Favorite girls Rin=Lilly>Misha=Hanako=Emi>Shizune
Favorite Routes Lilly>Rin=Emi>Hanako>Shizune

INFP

User avatar
Steinherz
Posts: 2095
Joined: Tue Dec 25, 2012 11:06 am
Location: New England

Re: Blossom - A Miki pseudo-route [First Chapter 07/09/2013]

Post by Steinherz » Fri Sep 06, 2013 9:24 pm

I like it. Very nice.
Though I think it could do without the music cues :p
Loeloe95 wrote:Also it's funny how Miki and Suzu together are just accepted as cannon on the forums at this point. :)
Probably due to all the fanart of them being together.
I write take a look, would you kindly?
I also draw, kind of.
KeiichiO wrote:You shall now, and forever be known as, "Steinherz, The Great".
Oddball wrote:It's an obvious mistake. Both are disfigured orphans that read alot and both wear green skirts.

User avatar
Sea
Posts: 778
Joined: Tue Jul 02, 2013 10:07 am
Location: Toronto

Re: Blossom - A Miki pseudo-route [First Chapter 07/09/2013]

Post by Sea » Fri Sep 06, 2013 11:06 pm

I'm just gonna wait, the curse is strong around these parts. When I see a finished label I'll read it.
Come join the Yamaku Book Club! Where stuff happens and we discuss cripple porn
I come from the outside, do you know it?

User avatar
Steinherz
Posts: 2095
Joined: Tue Dec 25, 2012 11:06 am
Location: New England

Re: Blossom - A Miki pseudo-route [First Chapter 07/09/2013]

Post by Steinherz » Sat Sep 07, 2013 12:22 am

Also, I forgot to mention:
Image
I write take a look, would you kindly?
I also draw, kind of.
KeiichiO wrote:You shall now, and forever be known as, "Steinherz, The Great".
Oddball wrote:It's an obvious mistake. Both are disfigured orphans that read alot and both wear green skirts.

Guestimate
Posts: 117
Joined: Sun Feb 26, 2012 2:32 am

Re: Blossom - A Miki pseudo-route [First Chapter 07/09/2013]

Post by Guestimate » Sat Sep 07, 2013 12:40 am

Pretty good. But it seems a bit... rushed I guess? I can't really point it out. Maybe I'm just used to drawn-out descriptions everywhere...

User avatar
Mirage_GSM
Posts: 5992
Joined: Mon Jun 28, 2010 2:24 am
Location: Germany

Re: Blossom - A Miki pseudo-route [First Chapter 07/09/2013]

Post by Mirage_GSM » Sat Sep 07, 2013 5:07 am

Hmm...
Two things I noticed:
First, your Suzu seems to be extremely similar to the version in Scissorlips' story, starting with her relationship to Miki and the rather extreme version of narcolepsy. Not neccessarily a bad thing - I have a narcoleptic character like that in one of my stories as well, but I try to use it for comedic effect only.
Secondly - if a person collapses in front of you, would you really decide to carry them to class? If so, you'd fail in basic first aid, something Hisao (and indeed most people his age) should be capable of. It is shortly before the start of class. There should be plenty of students around for someone to get a nurse or at least a teacher. Hisao has no idea what her condition is - it could be life-threatening without medical aid. In fact unconsciousness IS life-threatening - your own tongue can cause you to suffocate.

Oh, and:
Also it's funny how Miki and Suzu together are just accepted as cannon on the forums at this point.
Emi > Misha > Hanako > Lilly > Rin > Shizune

My collected KS-Fan Fictions: Mirage's Myths
griffon8 wrote:Kosher, just because sex is your answer to everything doesn't mean that sex is the answer to everything.
Sore wa himitsu desu.

User avatar
Numb
Posts: 225
Joined: Thu Jul 11, 2013 8:29 am
Location: In a chair behind a desk. Always.

Re: Blossom - A Miki pseudo-route [First Chapter 07/09/2013]

Post by Numb » Sat Sep 07, 2013 5:59 am

Guestimate wrote:Pretty good. But it seems a bit... rushed I guess? I can't really point it out. Maybe I'm just used to drawn-out descriptions everywhere...
Yes, I feel the same way. I started writing this at about 10PM last night, but kept scrapping it until I was happy with it, but by that point it was nearly 1AM. In hindsight, I probably shouldn't have posted this until I could review it while I had energy to spare :lol:
Mirage_GSM wrote:Hmm...
Two things I noticed:
First, your Suzu seems to be extremely similar to the version in Scissorlips' story, starting with her relationship to Miki and the rather extreme version of narcolepsy. Not neccessarily a bad thing - I have a narcoleptic character like that in one of my stories as well, but I try to use it for comedic effect only.
Secondly - if a person collapses in front of you, would you really decide to carry them to class? If so, you'd fail in basic first aid, something Hisao (and indeed most people his age) should be capable of. It is shortly before the start of class. There should be plenty of students around for someone to get a nurse or at least a teacher. Hisao has no idea what her condition is - it could be life-threatening without medical aid. In fact unconsciousness IS life-threatening - your own tongue can cause you to suffocate.
First point, my Suzu is actually heavily based on Scissorlips character, simply because I think he captured her perfectly. Of course, I will be adding my own personality quirks and such, but I really like the idea of Suzu and Miki acting like sisters to each other.
Second, I understand this isn't the logical thing to do in reality, if somebody collapses you take them to help right away, but I figured it could work because Hisao is new to Yamaku, so doesn't know the procedure. It was also a convenient way for him to meet Miki :D

Anyway, thank you all for your feedback, I shall be working on the second chapter later today when I am actually awake. I might not have much time to work on this during weekdays however, I still have classes to deal with :(
Currently working on: Notes for a new project (Coming Soon™)
I did KS and other songs on note blocks in Minecraft: Playlist here
Old works| Rooftops - An Emi Story| Christmas with the Hakamichis | Not Like Him - Rin Perspective|Blossom - A Miki pseudo-route

User avatar
Hanako Nakai
Posts: 61
Joined: Sun Aug 11, 2013 11:44 am

Re: Blossom - A Miki pseudo-route [First Chapter 07/09/2013]

Post by Hanako Nakai » Sat Sep 07, 2013 9:46 am

someone wants the curse upon them... *insert maniacal laughter here, or Misha's laughter*
ImageImage
You should be a protagonist of a new story :lol:

Am I really that dense?

User avatar
Req
Posts: 181
Joined: Tue May 21, 2013 7:58 am

Re: Blossom - A Miki pseudo-route [First Chapter 07/09/2013]

Post by Req » Sat Sep 07, 2013 4:35 pm

nice, another Miki route. I hope you can break the curse, good luck.

User avatar
Numb
Posts: 225
Joined: Thu Jul 11, 2013 8:29 am
Location: In a chair behind a desk. Always.

Re: Blossom - A Miki pseudo-route [First Chapter 07/09/2013]

Post by Numb » Sat Sep 07, 2013 5:24 pm

Req wrote:nice, another Miki route. I hope you can break the curse, good luck.
Thanks for the blessing. I am currently taking a short break from typing chapter two (It's a long one, might need to split it), I can feel my hands starting to give out :lol:
Currently working on: Notes for a new project (Coming Soon™)
I did KS and other songs on note blocks in Minecraft: Playlist here
Old works| Rooftops - An Emi Story| Christmas with the Hakamichis | Not Like Him - Rin Perspective|Blossom - A Miki pseudo-route

User avatar
Numb
Posts: 225
Joined: Thu Jul 11, 2013 8:29 am
Location: In a chair behind a desk. Always.

Re: Blossom - Act One, Chapter Two: The Shanghai [Part One]

Post by Numb » Sat Sep 07, 2013 7:28 pm

[I have decided to ditch the music cues. I realised it breaks immersion in the story and adds irritating complexity to setting the scene. Sorry to those who liked the concept <3]
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“Are you sure you know where we are going Miki? We have been walking in circles for the past ten minutes…”

Suzu is right, this is the fifth time we have passed that art supply store. I think I saw that weird girl in there last time, but she is gone now. Miki stops, turning to look at Suzu. She looks peeved, but that might be because this is the third time she has been asked that same question.

“No, alright? I don’t know where the place is, but I promised her we would meet up there.”

Her? Miki didn’t say anything about another girl. Even Suzu looks a little surprised by this new information. Wait a second, did that sign say-

“Miki, is that it over there?”

Suzu asks before I get the chance. I squint a bit in the light in an attempt to read the washed out sign over the door, but to no avail.

“I can’t quite make it out, but it looks like the sign says ‘The Shanghai’, wanna check? It’s better than walking past the same building again.”

This earns me a quick jab to the shoulder and a stuck out tongue, but Miki agrees with me and we make our way over. I was right, this is the Shanghai. It looks pretty plain from the outside, I wonder what the interior is like? I quickly find out as Miki pushes the door open and nearly bumps into- wait, is that Shizune? What is she doing here? She notices me and nods curtly before passing us and heading back to Yamaku. Wait, was she here without Misha?

“Hi Miki~! Hi Suki~! Hi- Hicchan? What are you doing here~?”

Apparently not, as my ears tell me. Luckily the place is deserted, so no heads are turned.

CRASH-

“Eep!”

What was that?! It came from the kitchen, whatever it was.

“Yuuchan?! Are you okay in there~?”

Misha turns to stand up, but a waitress bursts through the kitchen doors before she can.

“Sorry! Welcome to the Shanghai!”

“Yuuko?”
“Yuuko?”
“Huh?”

Miki looks confused. Has she never met Yuuko before? I don’t see Miki as somebody who would visit the library often, but I thought they would know each other by now.

“Oh, Suzu! Hello, who are your friends?”

“Hisao Nakai, we’ve met before.”

Suzu looks at me. An awkward silence hangs between us for a few seconds. Maybe I should have let her do the introductions…

“Uh, yeah, him, and then this is Miki. Can we have a seat?”

“Oh no! Sorry, yes, let me find a menu and I will be right with you!”

Yuuko hurries off before we can say anything else, and Miki leads us over to Misha, who has now relaxed in her seat again. She scoots over and pats the space she was just in, looking at me. She wants me to sit next to her? I guess, I know her better than I know Miki or Suzu, so it only makes sense. Miki notices this though and pounces on the opportunity.

“So Hisao, you and Misha dating already? You move fast!”

My cheeks red hot, I turn to Misha, who is currently trying her hardest not to laugh. Of course, this was always doomed to fail, and the teahouse is filled by the sounds of a classic-

“Wahahahaha~! No Miki, Shicchan and I have been showing Hicchan around the school~! It’s only normal he sit beside his favourite tour guide, right Hicchan~?”

Both Misha and Miki wink at me, and Suzu has fallen asleep in the booth. I look everywhere but at the girls. The Shanghai is actually really nice, it’s traditional interior reminds me of the area I am in right now, a calm town in the countryside. I feel at home here, even though I was born and raised in a city. It just feels… right. Yuuko comes to the rescue carrying a small stack of menus, so we proceed to take our seats. Miki has slipped in beside Suzu, so I am left with no choice now. I take my place next to Misha.

“Are you ready to order?”

Yes Yuuko, thank you for saving me from this hell. Now, what is on the menu… There is a wide range of different teas and coffees, a few soups and some different flavours of cake. I haven’t had miso soup for a while, so I order that and some coffee. Miki has some chocolate cake and some tea and Misha orders a parfait.

Yuuko is left standing there awkwardly. Why is she- Oh, right. Suzu… I don’t want to be the one to wake her up, but Miki isn’t doing anything. Misha is oblivious to the whole situation, dancing around in her seat and drumming her fingers on the table.

“Uh, Miki? You might want to… Suzu, you know? She uh… needs to order?”

Yuuko lets out a sigh of relief as Miki nods and leans in to Suzu. She places her mouth at her ear again, but she isn’t saying anything this time… Wait, is that her tongue? Oh god, is she really-

“Argh! Miki, gross! I told you not to wake me up like that!”

“You need to order Snoozu, and I couldn’t resist. You taste good!”

A wink, a grin and a punch to the shoulder later, Suzu is ordering herself three cups of coffee, one of them to go, and some coffee cake. Yuuko checks with us one last time to make sure she has our orders right, and heads off to the kitchen. Miki is the first person to talk again.

“So Hisao, what brings you to Yamaku? No offense intended, but I like to find out what is wrong with people so I don’t wind up killing them, you know?”

That was a sinister way of putting it… I’m not sure if I am comfortable enough to talk about my condition with Miki yet, even if she is treating me to lunch. The way she said that though, it makes me want to tell her, for my own good. She might end up pushing me too hard or something and my heart could act up, and that wouldn’t be a good way to find out.

“I, uh, have a heart condition. Arrythmia. I don’t really want to talk about it though, I still have to come to terms with it myself and…”

I look up to see Miki reaching across the table. Her stump lands on my shoulder, and she looks me right in the eyes.

“It’s okay Hisao, I don’t need to hear more. I just know not to punch you too hard or let you see me naked now!”

“Wahahaha~! Miki, leave Hicchan alone~, he is mine~!”

Hold on, what? I already have two girls fighting over me? Two attractive ones no less! Oh no, my cheeks are burning again, and Miki is looking right at me.

“Wow Hisao, you are so easy! I haven’t even pulled out the big guns yet, and your face is brighter than Misha’s hair!”

“Hey! I thought you liked my hair!”

I shrink back into my chair. Hopefully this little argument shifts the attention away from me. I glance over at Suzu, and she has fallen asleep again. I wish I could do that, fall asleep whenever conversations get awkward.

“Hisao, tell Misha her hair looks stupid like this. Her old hair was better.”

“Miki~, don’t pull Hicchan into this, he never saw my old hair~!”

“Well I have the picture, should I show him?”

A dangerous look spreads across Misha’s face. I have never seen her angry before, but it is terrifying. Her golden eyes glint in the low light of the teahouse and her usual smile is replaced by a look I can only describe as hellish.

“Don’t. Show. Him. That. Picture.”

Miki grins, looks at me and shrugs. Hopefully that means this fight is over. Yuuko crashes out of the kitchen carrying our food, almost dropping Miki’s cake. I gesture over to her, offering my help, but she shakes her head and slowly stumbles her way over to the table.

“Yuuko, you know we could have helped you with that, right? You don’t need to take this load by yourself.”

“No, no. This is my job, I can’t let the customers do it for me. You all ordered coffee too, right?”

I nod. I don’t think Misha did, but she can give hers to Suzu if she doesn’t want it. At this rate, I think Suzu might need it. Yuuko sets down the food and scurries off behind the counter to fetch us our drinks. I try to steer into a new conversation before the fight starts back up.

“So, how do you and Misha know each other Miki? I didn’t think you two would be close, with Misha being in the student council and you being so relaxed.”

Miki stares at me for a few seconds. It’s slightly unnerving. Yuuko comes back and places the coffee in the middle of the table, and I take my one slowly. I even get a little sip in before Miki answers.

“Same reason as you Hisao. Misha helped me adjust to the school, gave me the tour she is giving you I imagine, unless she improved it since last year.”

So Miki is a recent transfer to Yamaku too. I probably should have been able to guess that, her stump still has bandages over it, so the injury has to be fairly fresh. I shouldn’t ask about that so soon though, it’s probably a sensitive topic. Losing a body part is more traumatising than finding out you have a broken heart after all.

“I don’t know, have I Hicchan~? I wouldn’t want you getting lost in the halls after all~!”

She doesn’t wait for an answer before attacking her parfait, which she has mashed up with her spoon. It looks disgusting, a grey-purple sludge with the occaisional streak of red.

“Yeah, I figured out where the library was after all, I think I will be fine.”

I turn to my soup. I don’t know why I ordered this, I should have gone with something more filling, like a sandwich or a cake. Oh well, I dig in anyway. The salty taste makes me choke a little, but that soon passes. It tastes good.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Next
I am working on the second half of this chapter right after posting this. As always, feedback is appreciated, errors corrected, blah blah blah. Back to work! :D
Last edited by Numb on Mon Sep 09, 2013 2:06 pm, edited 2 times in total.
Currently working on: Notes for a new project (Coming Soon™)
I did KS and other songs on note blocks in Minecraft: Playlist here
Old works| Rooftops - An Emi Story| Christmas with the Hakamichis | Not Like Him - Rin Perspective|Blossom - A Miki pseudo-route

User avatar
Oscar Wildecat
Posts: 477
Joined: Sun Jul 28, 2013 7:28 pm
Location: A short drive west of Kingdom Come.

Re: Blossom - A Miki pseudo-route [Update: 08/09/2013]

Post by Oscar Wildecat » Sat Sep 07, 2013 8:54 pm

... She wants me to sit next to here? ...
Shouldn't that be "She wants me to sit next to her?"

Anyway, nice update!
I like all the girls in KS, but empathize with Hanako the most.
"Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience." - Mark Twain
“Diplomacy is the art of telling people to go to hell in such a way that they ask for directions.” - Winston Churchill
Checkout SordidEuphemism's Logo Thread.

User avatar
Steinherz
Posts: 2095
Joined: Tue Dec 25, 2012 11:06 am
Location: New England

Re: Blossom - Act One, Chapter Two: The Shanghai [Part One]

Post by Steinherz » Sat Sep 07, 2013 10:07 pm

Numb wrote: Yuuko lets out a sigh of relief as Miki nods and leans in to Suzu. She places her mouth at her ear again, but she isn’t saying anything this time… Wait, is that her tongue? Oh god, is she really-

“Argh! Miki, gross! I told you not to wake me up like that!”

“You need to order Snoozu, and I couldn’t resist. You taste good!”
PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT!
BWAHAHAHA!
That's fucking gold, and the image of Miki doing that: :lol:

I liked the chapter thus-far. Because of that, I loved this chapter XD
I write take a look, would you kindly?
I also draw, kind of.
KeiichiO wrote:You shall now, and forever be known as, "Steinherz, The Great".
Oddball wrote:It's an obvious mistake. Both are disfigured orphans that read alot and both wear green skirts.

RedRover
Posts: 37
Joined: Sun Jul 14, 2013 3:33 am
Location: The Middle of Nowhere

Re: Blossom - A Miki pseudo-route [Update: 08/09/2013]

Post by RedRover » Sat Sep 07, 2013 10:21 pm

Interesting story. Hopefully you don't succumb to the Miki-route curse. That'd be disappointing.
"Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated." -Confucius
Quotes are fun.
I have a oneshot about little ol' Suzu. Read it! Or don't.

Post Reply