Why he lights up the night

[Lux]

3:52 am. 8 minutes until I am up. 8 minutes until it all comes out. When I first started this ritual 4 years ago, I never thought it would have this much of an impact on me. The raw emotion, the animalistic yet civilised behaviour. It has kept things under control. hell, I still remember the first moves I ever learnt.

I was in India, Panjab. I was visiting the first modern science university as a part of my short exchange program. I was walking back to my residence when I saw an Elder Sikh and 5 other young men. they were surrounding him. They pounced on him, and one by one he drove them to the ground with swift two handed strikes to the ribs. It was as if this old man was as spry as a young tiger. After the boys stopped cringing in pain, they got up of the ground, bowed, and went their respective ways. The elder just stood there, Stoically watching the sky. I walked up to him. I was at a loss for words, for I didn't know a lick of Panjabi. When I got up to him, I bowed and did the local greeting of respect. I tried to mimic the move he did as best as possible and tried to convey that I wanted to learn. He looked at me for a moment, sizing me up from head to toe. Finally, he nodded. I spent the rest of the day with my shoes and jacket off learning that one move. My discipline with science work came in handy here, the instructors movement was the control, and my attempts were the experiment. eventually, I found a method that gave positive results. The day ended with baited breath, I was overcome with happiness that i gotten the move down. when I was walking away, he called out to me and pointed to the ground. It looks like he was going to be here if I wanted him again. I ended up spending my most of my free time learning under him. The one thing I learn about him and Sikhs, is that they choose to die rather than letting truth and justice be withheld. Dying than letting truth be withheld.... That's what stuck with me.

I continued practicing the moves that I was taught well after I returned to Japan. Thoughts of defending truth were always in my mind. I was a scientist, and all scientists have an enemy. Religion, specifically Christianity. The lie that millions blindly see as truth. It caused Galileo to be trapped in his home until he withered away, and it caused Giodano Bruno burned to death in Rome for his theories on multiple universes. Innocent men who only tried to expand the minds of others and further the human race. Religion did to me just as it had done to Galileo and Bruno.

Even though a part of me had died, I still continued to practice. I guess it kept my mind off things. Although practicing by yourself gets boring after a while, and then you begin to think of the past. I needed to have a partner in order to keep my train of thought from looking back. I was more than lucky to find that basement in Tokyo during that long night out during one of my drunken stupors a year later. I was even luckier to find a branch an hour outside of Yamakau. Guess getting a sticky note is more useful when you’re drunk.



*BEEP BEEP BEEP*
There goes my watch. 4am. It's time. I step out of my car and walk to the old run down building in front of me. I go to the side, there's a metal door there. I slam on it three times. a rectangular peephole appears.

"Oh Mutou, it's you. don't you ever get tired of coming here?"
"Be quiet and open the door Toshi."

The slide closes, I hear the locks, and before it is even fully open I'm already inside. I can hear the noise from the other room, that bout must have just ended.

"Who's up tonight?"
"You're lucky tonight Mutou, got a temporary fighter from another branch. A farmboy from Hokkaido."
"Alright, That seems acceptable"

I take off my jacket, tie, shirt and shoes. Leaving my pinstripe Hugo Boss pants on, I reach into my pocket and pull out some tape. I wrap it as tightly around my knuckles but just enough that I can make a proper fist. I begin walking to the ring. I hear people calling my name, placing bets. I ignore them. I want to see this farmboy. When I finally reach the circle, I get my first gaze at him. 5'11, seems like 200lbs. well toned.

“hmm, this is going to be interesting.”

It's then that I see it. He has a cross around his neck. I feel the rage burning inside of me. I begin whispering to myself,

"Keep it together Akio, don't let emotions cloud your strikes."

Toshi calls out that all bets are off. Looks like it's time to Light up the Night. The farmboy has some good moves, but most of them are all basic streetfighting strikes. I still try to calm myself down and then he gets a good left hook in. I step back, everyone goes silent. I loosen my neck by bending it towards both sides. I then walk towards him with my both my hands touching and in front of me. He tries to strike, I smack it away, and then I use the move that was taught to me all those years ago. the farmboy goes flying, falls flat on his back, he is quick to get up, but seems dazed and confused. He tries to gain composure again. He pulls out his cross, kisses it and states,

"St. Michael the archangel.... give me strength."

I fucking lose it. I do a quickstep forward and spit in his face. He responds by quickstepping back and leaving his right leg and trying to wipe his vision clean. I jump forward and Heel kick as hard as I can into his knee. The sound of pain he makes and the feeling I get of breaking his leg is immense. He falls back and begins clutching his leg. He isn't limp so the fight isn't stopped. I pounce on him, and stand over top of his face. I begin to pummel him with blows. The next thing i know, I'm being pulled off him. My hands, face, and chest are covered in his blood. His face looks like red jelly. Some of the members drag me to the entrance and throw me out, Toshi quickly arrives, completely livid.

"WHAT THE FUCK MUTOU?! YOU NEARLY KILLED THE KID!"
"my bad."
"YOUR BAD? IS THAT ALL YOU HAVE TO SAY?!"
"he got me angry, I lost control."
"ANGRY?!? WHAT THE FUCK DID HE DO?!"
"he kissed the cross around his neck toshi.... you know how I feel about that."

Toshi grabs his head and leans back in frustration

"FOR FUCK SAKE MUTOU! NOT THIS AGAIN! ITS BEEN 2 YEARS! LET IT GO AND MOVE THE FUCK ON!"

It was here that I lost my composure with him. I let the rage flow through my words.

"YOU KNOW WHAT THEY FUCKING TOOK FROM ME. THEY TOOK MY FUCKING LIFE, TOSHI! MY WIFE AND SON! MY ENTIRE WORLD! FUCK YOU! YOU TRY TO MOVE ON AFTER SOMETHING LIKE THAT!"

Toshi seems taken aback from my outburst. He calms down and tries to reason with me. Looks like he doesn’t want to fight.

"Look Mutou, I understand but you have to let things go sometimes man. You're like my brother, but I have to uphold the rules. He went limp and you kept going. Cleaning this mess up, getting him to a hospital and then back to Hokkaido is not going to be easy. The fuzz is going to be breathing down our necks. You're banned for 2 months. Go get your stuff and wait it out. Go train or something."
"Rules are rules. See you later Toshi"

I walk back into the club to grab my things, when i walk back in, i can see the trail of blood leading to the doorway. Looks like they moved him already, musta got him into a transport and sent him off to the nearest hospital. People notice me and everyone goes silent. I grab my things and walk out. Toshi has disappeared. Whatever, I already said goodbye.The walk back to my car is nice. The calm winds are cooling the beads of sweat on my skin quite nicely. I get out my keys and unlock the car. I throw my stuff in the trunk and then get in the driver’s seat. The tape is still on my hands, so I begin to take it off. It’s then that I see the harp and writing on my right wrist. I tried to keep my composure, but I just can’t stop it. My head goes into the steering wheel and I begin sobbing.

“I miss you so much Roisin.”

A strict supporter of science and truth, falling in love with someone like her, I still can’t believe it happened; I fell in love with an Irish/Japanese catholic Redhead. We met in a bar in Kamakura, and from there the love grew like a wild rose. The only thing I had trouble accepting was her unwavering faith. I remember one time on a date I yelled at her for her stance on stem cell research. She didn’t speak to me for a week after that. I learned to stay my tongue and accept her. In order to show her the extent in which I was apologetic, I tattooed the Irish harp and her name on my right wrist. I told her that I love her and always want to be with her, and in order to do that I would have to accept her faith. We walked down the Aisle 6 months later at St.Mary’s Cathedral in Tokyo. 3 months after that we ended up conceiving.We were both ecstatic, we would have a family.

Within the beginning of the second trimester we came to a major fork in the road. A major complication was brought forward by the Obstetrician during the ultrasound. Looking at the condition of the placenta connection to the uterine wall, there is a extremely high chance of maternal and Infantile mortality. The O.B suggested an abortion in order reduce the chance of Roisin losing her life. We were in shock. We left the clinic, and for the ride home we were silent. Only once we got home and were in the kitchen did Roisin speak.

"I'm going to the church to pray, I'll be back in the evening."

I just sat in the living room looking off into the distance and contemplating how we could deal with this. Roisin returned about 5 hours later.

" I spoke with father Okada. I'm keeping the baby, Akio."
"What?"
"I'm keeping the baby, Kio."
"Róisín! think about this! you could die! I don't want to lose you!"
"Akio, this is God's will. This child is a human, we cannot abort it."
"and what happens if it kills you? what happens then? You're a human too!"
"Then we both follow God's plan and meet St.peter."
"I CAN'T FUCKING BELIEVE THIS. WHY?! WHY LISTEN TO THAT DAMN SUPERSTITION!?!"
"Kio... It's not a superstition to me. You accepted that part of me when we walked down that Isle..... if you love me, you'll stand by my decision"

Words couldn't fathom the emotions boiling inside me.... I just grab Róisín, hug her, and so on her shoulders. We slowly both drop to the floor. She begins caressing the back of my head. she then whispers into my ear.

"Solliciti non, amor."

The day came when Roisin needed to go to the hospital. I stood outside the waiting room. I saw the doctor come out, take his gloves and mask off, look me straight in the eye and tell me that my wife and newborn son were dead.I lost it. I screamed at the doctor to tell me why he couldn't save her. He said he did all he could. I walked into the room, I saw her and my son's lifeless bodies. Trying to keep composure the best I could, I kiss her forehead and say one last time,

"I love you Roisin."

I then walk out of the Hospital. I knew where I had to go. I drove straight to see Father Okada. When I arrived Mass was in full swing, but i didn't care. I marched down the main Isle and Yell at father Okada

"YOU SON OF A BITCH! WHY!? WHY DID YOU TELL HER TO KEEP IT?! SHES FUCKING DEAD NOW! DEAD! ALL BECAUSE SHE LISTENED TO YOUR FUCKING LIES!"

He tries to calm me down, but I wouldn't have it. I just give a nice right hook. It was at that point where men from the pews came out to restrain me and throw me out of the church. I would have killed him if they didn't stop me. I returned home. I drank myself to sleep. It took a while for me to even function on a minimal basis. In the end I ended up selling our place, scattering their ashes at Kamakura. and taking the job at Yamakau because of its seclusion and vicinity to a club.

I stop sobbing on the steering wheel and wipe the tears and sweat from my face. I take another look at my watch, It's about 5:40. I've got class at 11.

I better get back and clean up.

[Morph]

I'm surprised someone here writes about such a sensitive topic as religion. Good luck with that.