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Re: Iwanako: Mean Time to Breakdown {updated 2015-4-1}

Posted: Fri Apr 03, 2015 7:01 pm
by dewelar
Leaty wrote:
AntonSlavik020 wrote:It looks pretty cool, but it might be distracting. Thinking about it, I would probably prefer it without the flashing thumps.
Yeah, I wanted it to replicate the heartbeat effect from the VN, obviously, but it seems like that's pretty much impossible to do in text. At least, the way it is now, with three different thump speeds, doesn't work at all.

I deserve ridicule for trying to gild the lily like this. I edited it all to the slow thumps because I couldn't stand looking at it anymore.
Yeah, I have to agree here. I have a severe nystagmus in addition to being legally blind, and if there's any moving images on a page that I'm trying to read my eye gets drawn to it repeatedly. Not just distracting but causing me wicked headaches.

Re: Iwanako: Mean Time to Breakdown {updated 2015-4-1}

Posted: Fri Apr 03, 2015 7:03 pm
by Leaty
Yeah. I just wanted to test out the concept, because I've never been completely happy with just typing thump thump thump.

Well, at least nobody can say I'm not innovative.

EDIT: New avatar. I think I've learned my lesson about animations, and Spider-Gwen is arguably more symbolic of my writing than Madeleine Valois anyway.
YET ANOTHER EDIT: I changed my mind again. In case you're utterly perplexed, this was my avatar for like six hours.

Re: Iwanako: Mean Time to Breakdown {updated 2015-4-1}

Posted: Fri Apr 03, 2015 7:30 pm
by strange desire
Leaty wrote:I deserve ridicule for trying to gild the lily like this. I edited it all to the slow thumps because I couldn't stand looking at it anymore.
I think it's cool you tried something new. The forum medium offers some interesting possibilities, but it's hard to know how it'll look until you try. Plus, there's stuff like screen width and mobile users to think about.

I was curious, so I tried as well.

[example image, click to view]

Re: Iwanako: Mean Time to Breakdown {updated 2015-4-1}

Posted: Fri Apr 03, 2015 7:41 pm
by Leaty
That is a considerably slicker and less ostentatious version than mine, but it would still look ridiculous if you used it in place of as many thumps as I use during those scenes. It's fine on its own, but when you repeat it multiple times it has that awful "Christmas lights" effect.

Plus it would drive Dewelar crazy, and I would be the biggest bitch on the planet if I wrote a story about overcoming disability that was unreadable by the disabled.

Re: Iwanako: Mean Time to Breakdown {updated 2015-4-1}

Posted: Fri Apr 03, 2015 7:55 pm
by AntonSlavik020
Oh, you changed your avatar. As someone who recognizes people on the forum based on their picture, I didn't recognize you initially. It may no longer be Maddie, but its still really cool. Who is it?

Re: Iwanako: Mean Time to Breakdown {updated 2015-4-1}

Posted: Fri Apr 03, 2015 8:04 pm
by Leaty
AntonSlavik020 wrote:Oh, you changed your avatar. As someone who recognizes people on the forum based on their picture, I didn't recognize you initially. It may no longer be Maddie, but its still really cool. Who is it?
Wait, you recognized her? I thought I was the only person on these forums that read The Royal Trap. It's one of my favorite visual novels ever.

Anyway, as I said above, my avatar is Spider-Gwen ("Spider-Woman" in canon), a Marvel Comics superheroine. She's the Gwen Stacy from a universe where she was bitten by the radioactive spider instead of Peter Parker (who then became the Lizard out of envy for her and wound up getting killed.) So she's basically the Spider-Man equivalent of Iwanako in this fic.

Also, her title is amazing and I'm in love with her.

Re: Iwanako: Mean Time to Breakdown {updated 2015-4-1}

Posted: Fri Apr 03, 2015 8:11 pm
by dewelar
Leaty wrote:Plus it would drive Dewelar crazy, and I would be the biggest bitch on the planet if I wrote a story about overcoming disability that was unreadable by the disabled.
*laughs* I do appreciate that. Just to clarify my limitations, it wouldn't be so bad if it was just one occurrence, because I could easily scroll it off the page quickly. That particular batch was just too highly clustered. Also, avatars don't bother me, because I can set the window size so that they're off the right edge of my screen. Otherwise, I probably would have come to Mahorfeus' house with an ax by now :D.

ETA: Oh, he doesn't have that dancing girl with all the flashing green and black circles anymore. Those of you who've been here a while know the one I mean.

Re: Iwanako: Mean Time to Breakdown {updated 2015-4-1}

Posted: Fri Apr 03, 2015 8:16 pm
by AntonSlavik020
Leaty wrote:
AntonSlavik020 wrote:Oh, you changed your avatar. As someone who recognizes people on the forum based on their picture, I didn't recognize you initially. It may no longer be Maddie, but its still really cool. Who is it?
Wait, you recognized her? I thought I was the only person on these forums that read The Royal Trap. It's one of my favorite visual novels ever.
Its a visual novel by Hanako Games, of course I recognized her. I play every VN by her and Winter Wolves.
Leaty wrote: Anyway, as I said above, my avatar is Spider-Gwen ("Spider-Woman" in canon), a Marvel Comics superheroine. She's the Gwen Stacy from a universe where she was bitten by the radioactive spider instead of Peter Parker (who then became the Lizard out of envy for her and wound up getting killed.) So she's basically the Spider-Man equivalent of Iwanako in this fic.

Also, her title is amazing and I'm in love with her.
That sounds really cool. I love AUs like that.

Re: Iwanako: Mean Time to Breakdown {updated 2015-4-1}

Posted: Fri Apr 03, 2015 8:32 pm
by Mirage_GSM
The flashing images were a nice idea, but it really doesn't work on the forums.
Apart from maybe necessitating an epillepsy warning the main difference between this and a VN is that there visual effects appear exactly timed with the event. Here they appear as soon as you scroll down so you see them two or three paragraphs before ou even get there, in effect creating an inadvertent spoiler :-)
In this case it would also ruin the effect of surprise Iwanoako feels when she notices Hanako, because the reader is no longer limited only to her point of view.

Re: Iwanako: Mean Time to Breakdown {updated 2015-4-1}

Posted: Fri Apr 03, 2015 9:24 pm
by Leaty
Mirage_GSM wrote:criticism I deserve
All of this is correct. It was a waste of time, but an interesting waste of time. Maybe the thumps can be turned into the emoticon for "HNNNG." I just wish that I could figure out how to make Iwanako's heart murmurs as terrifying as they are in the VN.

Anyway, since I'm fiddling around tonight with apparently nothing better to do: I figured that since the subject of Iwanako's uniform comes up so much in Scene Eighteen, I should mention that I based its design on the uniforms of some background characters from an old Sailor Moon episode:

Image

Adjusting the color scheme to match what we see of Iwanako's uniform in the Prologue, that would make her uniform look like approximately this. (Nobody criticize my weaksauce photoshopping.)

Image

Maybe the time I wasted on that will elucidate for somebody what Iwanako's supposed to look like.

Re: Iwanako: Mean Time to Breakdown {updated 2015-4-1}

Posted: Fri Apr 03, 2015 10:25 pm
by brythain
Leaty wrote:Maybe the time I wasted on that will elucidate for somebody what Iwanako's supposed to look like.
See, after reading the last few bits of thread... I now think that Iwanako looks like Spider-Gwen but with black hair. :D

Re: Iwanako: Mean Time to Breakdown {updated 2015-4-1}

Posted: Fri Apr 03, 2015 10:40 pm
by Leaty
Psh, we figured out several chapters ago that Iwanako looks like Zii from Ménage à 3:

Image

(look at me, shitting up my own thread!)

Re: Iwanako: Mean Time to Breakdown {updated 2015-4-1}

Posted: Sat Apr 04, 2015 1:00 am
by Blank Mage
I admit, I'm also thrown off by the change in avatar, mostly because my mental image of you was essentially Madeline. (No, I haven't read it, but I do know my visual novels...)

Also, I am my avatar. Physically and mentally.

Re: Iwanako: Mean Time to Breakdown {updated 2015-4-1}

Posted: Sat Apr 04, 2015 1:31 am
by Leaty
Blank Mage wrote:I admit, I'm also thrown off by the change in avatar, mostly because my mental image of you was essentially Madeline. (No, I haven't read it, but I do know my visual novels...)
...Damn it. I was already feeling like Spider-Gwen didn't quite fit, and then you went and said a thing like that and I had to adopt a new solution.

For the record, I could cosplay a very effective Madeleine. Well, if I took out all my piercings.

Re: Iwanako: Mean Time to Breakdown {updated 2015-4-1}

Posted: Sat Apr 04, 2015 3:31 am
by Hacksorus
I may have already commented something like this in one of the several month intervals between parts but I just want to say that I really like this and I'm happy to see it's still going strong.