Iwanako: Mean Time to Breakdown {updated 2015-4-1}

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bhtooefr
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Re: Mean Time to Breakdown — (Iwanako, Divergence){u 10/20/2

Post by bhtooefr » Tue Oct 22, 2013 9:04 pm

Hmm, I just read back through this whole thread again.

Wonder who all's gonna visit.

The Emi/Iwanako dynamic is gonna be quite interesting to read, that much is obvious. Why do I get this feeling that Emi will be visiting Iwanako of her own accord, and apologizing? (And it having legitimately nothing to do with Nurse chewing her out.)

For what it's worth, I like the redone heart attack scene a lot better.

I'll note that the dynamic I'm looking forward to the most is the Lilly/Iwanako dynamic. Yes, even more than the Hanako/Iwanako dynamic, despite finding Hanako the character I empathize with the most in the VN. I think I can predict the general plot overview of it really well (and I think I even see explicit foreshadowing of it in a place or two), but the strength I've seen in your writing, especially with these Emi scenes, is that you manage to make the actual implementation of it quite surprising and effective, even when using predictable plot points.

I do think the fact that you mentioned that Iwanako is none of the route characters' true loves might actually spoil a bit too much, as far as the framing of each character's dynamic, but that's just my opinion. Still, it could magnify the impact of certain routes imploding, you're good at magnifying impact by using what the reader already knows but the characters don't.

Finally... while I'm not sure that Lilly actually is Kinsey 0... what if she's biromantic despite her sexuality? I could actually see that happening in her case, for some reason. And it could be really, really ugly.
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Leaty
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Re: Mean Time to Breakdown — (Iwanako, Divergence){u 10/20/2

Post by Leaty » Wed Oct 23, 2013 12:15 am

bhtooefr wrote:I do think the fact that you mentioned that Iwanako is none of the route characters' true loves might actually spoil a bit too much, as far as the framing of each character's dynamic, but that's just my opinion. Still, it could magnify the impact of certain routes imploding, you're good at magnifying impact by using what the reader already knows but the characters don't.
That Iwanako isn't the true love of any of the main five shouldn't come as a spoiler at all. In fact, the reader already knows this if they've one hundred percented Katawa Shoujo, because it's very obvious that Hisao is their true love. And even though Delta appears to believe in Death of the Author, the KS devs have said themselves that this is the case.

If this were a fic about true love, that would be a problem, but it isn't, so you shouldn't take it to mean Iwanako won't get into a romance with one of the main five.

Now, if you want an actual spoiler, here is a comprehensive list of the Katawa Shoujo characters Iwanako will definitely not get into a relationship with: Takashi, Taro, Mutou, Nomiya, Jigoro, Sae, the cameo characters, Hanako's psychologist, the guy who phones Meiko in the track meet scene, Hisao's parents, Hisao's cardiologist, Lilly's parents, Lilly's aunt, the art club, the antique shop guy, the waiter at the French restaurant, and Akira's boyfriend.

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Re: Mean Time to Breakdown — (Iwanako, Divergence){u 10/20/2

Post by forgetmenot » Wed Oct 23, 2013 9:58 am

Leaty wrote:Takashi, Taro, Mutou, Nomiya, Jigoro, Sae, the cameo characters, Hanako's psychologist, the guy who phones Meiko in the track meet scene, Hisao's parents, Hisao's cardiologist, Lilly's parents, Lilly's aunt, the art club, the antique shop guy, the waiter at the French restaurant, and Akira's boyfriend.
I'm noticing a definitive lack of Nurse in that list. Me gusta. :wink:

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Re: Mean Time to Breakdown — (Iwanako, Divergence){u 10/20/2

Post by Mirage_GSM » Wed Oct 23, 2013 11:39 am

Leaty wrote:...the guy who phones Meiko in the track meet scene...
His identity is heavily implied.
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Leaty
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Re: Mean Time to Breakdown — (Iwanako, Divergence){u 10/20/2

Post by Leaty » Wed Oct 23, 2013 12:21 pm

I know, but it's not definitive. It's ambiguous enough that he might just be some random douchebag Meiko knows.

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Re: Mean Time to Breakdown — (Iwanako, Divergence){u 10/20/2

Post by Helbereth » Wed Oct 23, 2013 5:32 pm

Leaty wrote:Takashi, Taro, Mutou, Nomiya, Jigoro, Sae, the cameo characters, Hanako's psychologist, the guy who phones Meiko in the track meet scene, Hisao's parents, Hisao's cardiologist, Lilly's parents, Lilly's aunt, the art club, the antique shop guy, the waiter at the French restaurant, and Akira's boyfriend.
Hideaki isn't on that list... interesting.

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Re: Mean Time to Breakdown — (Iwanako, Divergence){u 10/20/2

Post by Panthour » Wed Oct 23, 2013 5:41 pm

Leaty wrote:Now, if you want an actual spoiler, here is a comprehensive list of the Katawa Shoujo characters Iwanako will definitely not get into a relationship with: Takashi, Taro, Mutou, Nomiya, Jigoro, Sae, the cameo characters, Hanako's psychologist, the guy who phones Meiko in the track meet scene, Hisao's parents, Hisao's cardiologist, Lilly's parents, Lilly's aunt, the art club, the antique shop guy, the waiter at the French restaurant, and Akira's boyfriend.
And here I was hoping the Antique Store Guy would get a paring. Ah well. :)

In all seriousness there are many characters not on that list, and I'm actually enjoying the suspense and mystery revolving around the pairing.
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Post by Bad Apple » Wed Oct 23, 2013 6:25 pm

Leaty wrote:Now, if you want an actual spoiler, here is a comprehensive list of the Katawa Shoujo characters Iwanako will definitely not get into a relationship with: Takashi, Taro, Mutou, Nomiya, Jigoro, Sae, the cameo characters, Hanako's psychologist, the guy who phones Meiko in the track meet scene, Hisao's parents, Hisao's cardiologist, Lilly's parents, Lilly's aunt, the art club, the antique shop guy, the waiter at the French restaurant, and Akira's boyfriend.
Oh, thank God. We can still ship IwanakoxTrack Team Captain. I don't care he's gay, it's
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WilyWiley
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Re: Mean Time to Breakdown — (Iwanako, Divergence){u 10/20/2

Post by WilyWiley » Wed Oct 23, 2013 10:07 pm

Well that was depressing.

I love it. Keep it up, can't wait for more!
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emmjay
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Re: Mean Time to Breakdown — (Iwanako, Divergence){u 10/20/2

Post by emmjay » Thu Oct 24, 2013 12:20 am

Leaty wrote:Now, if you want an actual spoiler, here is a comprehensive list of the Katawa Shoujo characters Iwanako will definitely not get into a relationship with: Takashi, Taro, Mutou, Nomiya, Jigoro, Sae, the cameo characters, Hanako's psychologist, the guy who phones Meiko in the track meet scene, Hisao's parents, Hisao's cardiologist, Lilly's parents, Lilly's aunt, the art club, the antique shop guy, the waiter at the French restaurant, and Akira's boyfriend.
Hmm. You make a point of mentioning the guy who phones Meiko, but you don't rule out the possibility of Meiko herself. Interesting...
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Solistor
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Re: Mean Time to Breakdown — (Iwanako, Divergence){u 10/20/2

Post by Solistor » Mon Oct 28, 2013 1:27 pm

Enjoying this fic so far, keep doing good things.

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Dumanios
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Re: Mean Time to Breakdown — (Iwanako, Divergence){u 10/20/2

Post by Dumanios » Wed Oct 30, 2013 9:36 pm

How about Iwanako x Yuuko?

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Leaty
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Re: Mean Time to Breakdown — (Iwanako, Divergence){u 10/20/2

Post by Leaty » Wed Oct 30, 2013 10:31 pm

Well, I know that griffon8 is adamantly opposed to Yuuko/Iwanako, for reasons I'm not totally clear on.

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Re: Mean Time to Breakdown — (Iwanako, Divergence){u 10/20/2

Post by griffon8 » Wed Oct 30, 2013 11:12 pm

Eh? That's taking what I said too far. If you were to make it Iwanako/Yuuko, I would advise against it, but you're the writer.
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Leaty
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Re: Mean Time to Breakdown — (Iwanako, Divergence){u 10/20/2

Post by Leaty » Wed Oct 30, 2013 11:27 pm

Okay, true, not "adamantly." You never explained why, though. Image

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