Butterflies (Was Rinicisms) (Erotic bits)Feedback welcome

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Butterflies (Was Rinicisms) (Erotic bits)Feedback welcome

Post by Homeless » Tue Mar 13, 2012 10:50 pm

Writers note: Hmm... I started writing this as just a little side project.

I have a few Ideas where this is heading, after writing the second part I found that I had lost myself in writing. Kinda neat really.

New Beginnings.


She stood up there on that rock for quite some time. I watched her as it went from dusk to the dark of night. Eventually I climbed up and sat down beside where she was standing, giving my legs a rest and not caring about getting wet. With a fluid motion that comes from someone as agile as this woman is, she "plopped" down beside me.

"Butts wet," Rin says, turning to look at me. "We could go, but I thought we could watch the stars for a while," I respond putting my arm around her and pulling her close with a smile. "That's OK, I want to stay," Nuzzling in close, apparently not interested in the stars at all as her hair falls over her face. We sit like this for a while, in that comfortable silence that I've grown to like about her. Losing track of time, I watch the moon rise, a full one at that. With nothing but the sounds of the light wind blowing around us and both of our breaths, I get lost in my thoughts about what the future may bring now.

"Hisao?" She asks, looking up at me with those big deep eyes. "Mmm?" Raising an eyebrow. "You have plans for the future?" She scrunches her face at this. "I mean what are you going to do next year, not that you predict the future. Can you?" I give a little laugh, making her cock her head to one side. "I don't think so, but I do see you in my future." As soon as it's out of my mouth I feel corny, and begin to blush. She smirks, "OK, lets head back."

The walk back was quiet, except for the sound of the wind in the trees. What do I have planed for the future. We could live together, I have no doubt about that, but what would I DO? I do like drawing, and art, but I'm no where near Rins level. I do find science fairly easy to understand, I think that's it. Waking from my train of thought, I don't see Rin, until I turn my head. She's walking besides me. Odd, shes never done that before. As far as looks go, for Rin any ways. You would almost say she was feeling smug. It gives me an odd feeling, but a good one.

We reach the dorms, undetected by the patrolling staff and make our way to my room. At my door, as I'm fishing for the key, Rin, standing behind me, noticing the usual soft blue glow coming from underneath my neighbours door. Kenji is an odd one, a lot odder than Rin, but he did have his own.. whats the word Lilly used? Ah uniqueness. He was unique. I smile at that thought and open the door to my room with Rin on my heels.

As I'm closing the door behind her, I catch out of the corner of my eye, that look. A man who's had a intimate moment with a woman knows it. I ignore it, locking the door, and glancing at the clock. 4ish in the morning, wow, I was lost there. I'm not tired, though I should be. I walk past Rin, watching her face out of the corner of my eye as I grab the first of too many bottles of medications that I need to take. A little scowl briefly skitters across her face before returning to her normal almost unreadable expression. I try my best to hide my smile while swallowing my pills, I know full well she's not one to tip toe when she's "frisky?". As I put the last pill bottle down and turn to face her, her expression changes. It's odd, her face is not normally so expressive, but then again, today was a rather big day, for both of us. Lost in thought, I don't notice her taking a few steps towards me. Next thing I know, Rin's small shoulder is in my gut, with her stumpy arms embracing me the best they can, as I'm knocked backwards onto my bed.

Edit: Just fixed some things.
Last edited by Homeless on Wed Mar 28, 2012 6:31 pm, edited 7 times in total.
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Re: Rinicisms and other ramblings.

Post by CarnivalNights » Wed Mar 14, 2012 12:10 am

Minor grammar issues: break instead of brake and heels instead of heals.

Otherwise, love it. Not enough Rinfics so I thoroughly enjoyed this piece. Can't wait for the next.
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Re: Rinicisms and other ramblings.

Post by Homeless » Wed Mar 14, 2012 12:43 am

Thanks, totally missed those, dyslexia, a bottle of wine, and a late night make it hard to catch them all. Need all the help I can get!
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Re: Rinicisms and other ramblings. (Erotica)

Post by Homeless » Wed Mar 14, 2012 1:52 am

This one was fun. Again comments and suggestions are welcome.

Heat

Mmm. He can't be that dense. Maybe he's in shock from earlier. I don't think so, he looks too, what's the word, not happy, smug maybe? I don't know, that might be it. Maybe if I don't give him a chance to think, once he's done with his pills. Swallow dammit. Now. I open what I have for arms and, at the last minute I remember he's taking those pills for a reason and attempt to soften the blow, by wrapping these so called arms of mine around his mid section. You are now under my control. I squirm up so I can straddle his waist. He's giggling like a little girl. That's no good.

“Something funny?” I ask, while he looks at me with a smirk on his face. “You better get this out now, I'm not sure how my father will feel about you tackling his son with a heart condition.” Mmm, I'm going to meet the parents am I? Need to think on that. After a few moments thought, I look down at Hisao. His face seems tense, maybe. Strained, yes that's it, strained. Wonder why.
Not a good look for him, not at all. I climb off him, and go to turn out the lights. When I come back he's looking at me, hard to see, but he is. There's questions in that face.

“Hisao, tell me about your family,” I ask. I hear his breath catch, only for a second, I think. I climb back over him and worm my way under his arm resting my head on his chest. No urges anymore, that's weird. Wonder why?

“Well, where do I begin?” There's a hitch there, he's not... I don't know, something's not right. “Fathers,” His face scrunches “well, fathers old fashioned.” He says with a troubled look on his face. Ah. That's it. Dad doesn't like his son dating cripple girls. Hmm. “He'll love me, if you take after him at all, he will,” I say as I look up at him. That face, that's just wrong putting a face that belongs in a picture on a boy like this. Almost heart breaking. Dammit, I think my crotch has a mind mind of its own. What is it they say about red heads? Fire box, no, that's not it. Fire crotch, that's it.

“Hisao, I told you I love you, isn't the normal thing to do after that is have sex?” I look up at him, practising the hurt puppy look Emi pulls off. Need to talk to that girl, need more pointers. I throw my leg up over this boy and position myself over his crotch. He looks surprised, maybe confused, hard to tell. I have needs though. So does he apparently from what I can feel. I bend down to his neck, nibbling as I rock my hips. There it is, that little gasp, a little bit of heaven. Or at least heaven to someone who's not a eunuch. Or would a eunuch enjoy this?

I feel hands on my butt. It's good, hard to stop a reaction. I moan out loud. “You need to undress me. Now.” My attempt at being as firm as Emi apparently fails, as he laughs, bucking his hips in the process. This only makes my situation worse. Not good. “Hisao, if we are going to be a, whatever it is we are, you need to learn a few things.” This gets his attention. “If how you handled my breasts earlier was any sign, you'll need to learn how to do girl things. Now undress me,” With that he reaches up and with shaky hands and pulls off my tie, and then fumbles with my shirt buttons. That face, hard to read, I wonder what color he is. He looks burnt umber, no not that, defiantly not that. He's gotten my bra off. He's learning anyways. My breasts in his face is making it hard for him to undo my pants. Never thought he'd have trouble with that. Alger blue, yes that's it, alger blue.

With a quick motion, he scoops me up and spins me around so he's on top of me. OK, so he's got some things down. He's tugging my pants and panties off. Next before I know it, he's in me and working his hips rhythmically. Damn, that's deep. I like this position, legs up on his shoulders. I can see that face. He's grinning like, I don't know, do wolfs grin? It's not long before I finish, unfortunately rather wetly. I can't keep the noise in, and groan in pure delight. After his hands find my breasts, quickly working me up again. One hand finds its way to that little spot. I let out a loud moan, looking up into Hisaos face. He's almost done, I clench as tight as I can. That does it. Now that's the look of heaven. He collapses on me. I press my head to his chest to listen to his heart. It's loud, but normal? I guess, I hope so. He kisses me deeply, and rolls off.

“Hisao let me sleep against the wall,” I ask before he gets too comfortable. He sighs and kisses me again with a grin. I snuggle up to him as he settles and I catch his pause. “Um, Rin.. the bed's wet”..

Edited to fix some things.
Last edited by Homeless on Wed Mar 28, 2012 6:32 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Rinicisms and other ramblings. (Erotic bits)Feedback wel

Post by Homeless » Thu Mar 22, 2012 1:35 am

OK, sorry for the wait, but here's the third installment. I have to say, after reading many of the other fan fiction here, I am impressed.

The swarm.

Today is a better day to start summer vacation. It's bright out, and enjoy the warmth coming through a crack in my curtains. I feel hair tickling my chest. I open my eyes and there's a softly snoring girl with auburn hair. A peaceful look, rarely seen, even when she's painting. I supposed it is reserved for times like these. Regretfully, I crane my neck to glance at my clock and lay back down and close my eyes. 1:20 pm, I guess I'm staying today. We'll go home tomorrow. Then I think back about my time since coming to Yamaku Academy. All the people I've met, and then about Rin. At that last thought, my body becomes aware of her body up against my own. I look down to her face, she's awake, and those deep pools that always seem so distant are here and now it seems.

“Morning,” I breath, barely keeping a smile from my face.

“Hellooo,” she responds, arching her back like a cat. It's hard to stop from noticing the muscles of her back showing through her skin. She'd forget to eat at all, on her own I bet. I wonder how strong that back must be?

“Am I going to meet the parents today?” sitting up and giving me a look from over her shoulder.

Placing my hands behind my neck and relaxing “Tomorrow, they'd be at work now, I told them I'd call the day before we come up.”

I do my best not to think about how my parents will react to this interesting person beside me. With a quick fluid motion she turns, straddles my mid section and is cocking her head at me, her hair looking like its usual mess.

“I'll call them after we eat,” On cue my stomach growls. “but first I need a shower.” Rin's face barely hides that little frown that flashes before being replaced with a small grin. Her eyes twinkle “OK, you need to help me in the shower.” I sigh, trying to keep my eyes off the auburn patch between her thighs as she deftly gets of off me and stands up. For a moment there's a look in her eyes, a familiar look that puts me on edge.

“You OK?” I ask attempting to keep my face neutral while picking up the scattered remains of her clothes and grabbing fresh clothes for myself. We'll have get her some fresh clothes first, thinking to myself waiting for a reply. After a few seconds she gives her head a quick shake, “Yes, fine. Do need shower though, all sweaty.” I grin as a reply.

As we leave my dorm room, there door across the hall opens and very tired looking Kenji pokes his head out the door. Peering at first me and then Rin. “Hello,” She says in reply to his inquisitive look. He peers closer at her then back to me. Before closing his door he mutters “God damn banshees screaming in the middle of the night, it's the beginning of the end I tell you!” I shake my head and smile before Rin and I head off to her room for some clean clothes for her before we shower.

It's quiet, as we shower, with her giving me short instructions here and there. It's harder than I imagined helping a girl shower, and no matter what I think of I can't stop the erection, but she ignores it, as my stomach complains about not getting the attention it needs.

I leave Rin in her room while she packs what she needs for her trip as I head to the cafeteria to grab some food. When I come back, she's sitting on the edge of her bed, her suitcase open and partially filled with clothes, a sketch book and other girl things. She's stopped in mid activity, a pair of panties clenched in the toes of her right foot. I cant help the twinge of fear that grabs my chest, I watch for a moment longer. She doesn't move, her eyes have that same foggy look, like she's not looking at anything.

“Rin, here eat something,” A few moments more, and she blinks. The fear lets go, “Are you OK?” She looks up at me with no hint of any emotion and says in her normal deadpan voice, “Swarm of butterflies”

Edited to fix some things
Last edited by Homeless on Wed Mar 28, 2012 6:34 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Rinicisms and other ramblings. (Erotic bits)Feedback wel

Post by CommnderShepard » Thu Mar 22, 2012 1:54 am

Not bad, keep up the good work. :)
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Re: Rinicisms and other ramblings. (Erotic bits)Feedback wel

Post by Homeless » Sat Mar 24, 2012 6:24 pm

Part four, enjoy.

Going home:

He's a pacer, didn't figure him for one. Not surprised though.

“Hello mother, how are you?”

I tune out the conversation, or I try to. He runs his hands though his hair a lot too. With one piece always popping back up. Makes him stand out in a crowd. I wonder what he'd look like with short hair. I look out the window. The sun is hidden from view, but the clouds are there. I wonder if he has a thing for girls with auburn hair. That cloud looks like a duck, creepy.

“Her name is Tezuka Rin. Yes mother, um well see she..”

Hehe, that bothers him. I can not help but to smirk at that. Did I pack my pencil sharpener? I unzip my luggage with my left foot and rummage through it until I find it. I hate that thing, hard to use. I haven't had mango in a while. I have to make up for the lost time in school after meeting the parents for a week. My feet are dry, I wonder if Hisao would put lotion on them like Emi did.

“Did mother fall over dead?” I ask as zip up my luggage again. He can't hide his shock. I grin.
“No, she's fine, father say's he's looking forward to meeting you,” He scratches the back of his neck, he couldn't hide his feelings if he tried. “He says he's never met a famous artist before.” I can't do anything but turn my head and look at him. “May be I was over thinking things.” He says sheepishly. I smirk at him and return my attention the window. “They'll be here tomorrow for 9, but they both have to work once we get home so we'll have the house to our selves.”

The duck's gone now, now it's a turtle, maybe with something on its back. Hisao's saying something, “Rin, any idea of what you'd like to do the rest of the day?” I nod, stand and head for the door. “Lets walk”

The rest of the day is spent walking around the small town just outside of school, can't remember the name. It's quiet though, nice. We end up back at the dorms, late I would guess, from the look of the where the moon is. I look up at Hisao, “You need to pack, can't be late for meeting the parents,” He smiles ruefully. “Good night Rin,” He replies kissing me. “Night” I turn and head to my room.

-----

The next morning finds me awake rather earlier than I wanted to be. I think I was having a nice dream. I don't remember. I know it involved turtles, and Hisao riding them. Weird. I don't worry about getting dressed, I slept in my clothes. More efficient that way. I look at my clock, 6:15 am. Not good. I grab some clean clothes and stuff them into a plastic bag and head out to the boy's dormitory.

Spotting the guard, I jump into the bushes, holding the bag of clothes as hard as I can in my mouth, and watch as he passes by. That man is not normal. Saw him staring at Emi once. He's a pervert I think. Once the coast is clear I make my way into the boys dorm and ignore a few of the surprised looks I get. I kick the door.

It takes a few minutes but he answers, looking very much like he rolled out of bed.

“Pfowr” I attempt to say. It's difficult to talk with a bag in your mouth. “OK, OK,” he says taking the bag from my mouth while laughing at me and plucking a twig from my hair.

The morning runs on with our routines, he's getting better at bathing girls, but not getting erections. We end up out in front of the gates to the school with our bags, I wonder if I could ride it down the hill.

Hisao looks at his watch and looks over at me, “They should be here any minute now, and no you can't ride that down the hill”, grinning as if he likes the thought. I attempt the puppy dog tacit again and fail.

A car pulls up the hill as I contemplate the dynamics of luggage luge. The car's parked and his parents step out to hug their son.

“Father, Mother, I'd like you to meet Tezuka Rin” I'm watching their faces, his mom looks really happy to meet me, but dad looks a little nervous. “We hear you've gotten our son interested in art, I'm very impressed, we never had time to get him interested in things like that.” His mother said. “He joined the art club all on his own, I just happened to be there.” I smile at her and then at Hisao, who's blushing for some reason. His father packs the last of our bags in the trunk and states “We should be off, it's quite a drive.” That's where he gets his looks from.

We all pile in the car, dark blue, I like it, and head off down the road. Hisao chats with his parents as I watch a particularly nice cloud go by. I hear bit's and pieces of the conversation, when Hisao rests his hand on my shoulder. I look to him, “Father asked your plans after high school,” I think about this for a moment. “I've thought about continuing to paint. Maybe going to University, but I'm not good at it, school that is, not painting.” His father nods and I return my attention to the window. They continue to chit chat when the butterflies come.

Edited to fix some things.
Last edited by Homeless on Wed Mar 28, 2012 6:37 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Rinicisms and other ramblings. (Erotic bits)Feedback wel

Post by Daitengu » Sat Mar 24, 2012 7:20 pm

You sir, have great punctuation lol

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Post by Homeless » Sat Mar 24, 2012 7:30 pm

Daitengu wrote:You sir, have great punctuation lol
That sarcasm?
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Re: Rinicisms and other ramblings. (Erotic bits)Feedback wel

Post by Daitengu » Sat Mar 24, 2012 7:35 pm

Homeless wrote:
Daitengu wrote:You sir, have great punctuation lol
That sarcasm?
No, not at all. There's not paragraph long run on sentences, proper use of punctuation with quotes. Your punctuation fits to about how I imagine Rin would think. Though I'd imagine if Rin blurted out all her thought process at once, it'd probably end up as one long run on sentence as a paragraph lol Happens in the VN after all lol

I'm just commenting after having read some crazy fics with some bad, bad sentence structure lol

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Post by Homeless » Sat Mar 24, 2012 7:41 pm

Good to know, English wasn't my strongest subject to say the least. Also little worried that people wouldn't pick up on the alternating view points.
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Post by Daitengu » Sat Mar 24, 2012 7:58 pm

Homeless wrote:Good to know, English wasn't my strongest subject to say the least. Also little worried that people wouldn't pick up on the alternating view points.
You should be proud. You're doing better than many native english speakers. The switching view point is pretty noticeable, so I wouldn't worry about it. Your rendition of Rin's thoughts is pretty distinct versus Hisao's thoughts.

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Post by Homeless » Sun Mar 25, 2012 10:33 pm

Part 5 (This is longer than I thought it would be.)

Memory lane.

After awhile my parents fall silent, as silent as Rin sitting beside me. I can't help but worry about her. I accept her for her, but I don't think she's happy with those periods either where she seems lost. She'd probably kick me for thinking these things.

I do my best to put those thoughts aside as I look over to Rin. She looks peaceful, well as peaceful as she can when she's awake and not painting. She's wearing tan cargo pants that I helped her get into this morning and a camouflage long sleeve shirt, with the usual knots in the arms. It's the sports bra that makes it hard to keep from blushing, especially since my parents are an arms length away. She turns and notices me looking, which brings a corner of her mouth up in an evil looking smirk. “Hisaso, are you going to show me off to your home town?” She's gone full blown evil smile now. “Naw, was thinking of keeping you locked up in the workshop.” I respond trying my best to keep a blank face. “Not in my work shop you are not,” Father pipes up, glancing at me with a grin in the rear view mirror.

“She won't be any trouble in the shop,” I laugh as Rin beats me with the stump of her left arm. “OK, the grand tour it is,” I say as I raise my arms defensively. “Were almost there Rin, don't let him bully you,” Mother says with a chuckle while taking in the view. “Don't worry. I can take him,” she says looking up at me with her eyes a sparkle.

We spend the rest of the trip home with me pointing out different buildings from my past, my old school, the games hall where I'd play pool after school when my parents worked late and the tea house I would go to some times on lunch. The feeling of nostalgia floods over me, until I notice Rin looking up at me, her face as unreadable as ever but her eyes are as focused as I've ever seen. I catch the slightest flash of a smile before she's back to her usual self.

We pull in the drive of my parents modest home, and we all pile out, with my father and I getting the luggage while my mother opens the door. Rin is taking the whole scene in, as she does with anything that interests her. Her attention to detail working in overtime as she looked over the garden, the house itself and the tall matsu that grows to the opposite side of the drive way.

“I like this,” Rin says, “It feels, I don't know..” she trails off. I can't help but catch my mothers smile as she opens the door from the corner of my eye. With luggage in one hand, I wrap my free arm around Rins shoulders and gently guide her to the front door. “This would explain a lot,” She says, giving me one last look before passing my Mother into the living room.

The rest of the time left before my parents go off to work was spent having lunch. This goes smoother than I expected, but still has its bumps. My mother, being the one for having meals at the table when ever the family was all in one place, was a little thrown off by Rins requirements for eating, but was more than willing enough to adapt. We moved to the washitsu that my parents kept for special occasions. Rin practically fell into a cross legged position beside me, while studying the tokonoma my parents both put up before I was born.

My parents both watched as Rin deftly digs into her bowl of oyakodon. I kept my grin to myself as my father struggled not to stare. “Did you make this room?” Rin asked, turning her head to look at the tokonoma behind her. “We both did, I folded the paper flowers, and Hisaos father did the hanging scrolls,” Mother says attempting to keep the pride out of her voice. “I like it,” Rin simply states. “The lunch and the toko, very tasty, the lunch that is,” before going back to her bowl. Father out right laughs at this earning him a cocked head from Rin with her fork raised partly to her opened mouth.

We finish lunch and bid my parents a good day at work before they leave. “We'll be home late so there's money for dinner on the kitchen table if you want to go out.” Mother says as father unlocks the car.

I finish washing up the lunch dishes and put them aside to air dry. Rin has perched herself on a stool my mother kept in the kitchen for when she has her morning coffee. She was now looking out the window that was over the sink into the back yard. “Calm, that's the word, calm,” Rin says out of the blue. “Do I get to see your bedroom now?” That evil grin returning to her face.

Edited to fix several things (Big thanks to Mirage_GSM for help on this one.)
Last edited by Homeless on Wed Mar 28, 2012 6:40 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Rinicisms and other ramblings. (Erotic bits)Feedback wel

Post by Mirage_GSM » Mon Mar 26, 2012 8:07 am

Tenses.
Keep to one of them.
Emi > Misha > Hanako > Lilly > Rin > Shizune

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Re: Rinicisms and other ramblings. (Erotic bits)Feedback wel

Post by Homeless » Mon Mar 26, 2012 10:39 am

Mirage_GSM wrote:Tenses.
Keep to one of them.
Thanks, I'll fix them when I find them.
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