A Familiar Face (Hanako Neutral End Fan Fiction) (U 2/14/13)

WORDS WORDS WORDS
User avatar
Elcor
Posts: 155
Joined: Wed Apr 18, 2012 10:45 pm

Re: A Familiar Face (Hanako Neutral End Fan Fiction)

Post by Elcor » Wed May 23, 2012 6:18 pm

Best of luck with the job hunt, hope you get something soon.
Fan Fiction writer's are drug dealers and they don't even know it.

User avatar
Other Self
Posts: 9
Joined: Fri Jun 22, 2012 12:10 am
Location: somewhere

Re: A Familiar Face (Hanako Neutral End Fan Fiction)

Post by Other Self » Fri Jun 22, 2012 8:31 pm

Enjoying every word of it, looking forward to the next part. :)
Image
Hanako > Rin > Emi = Lilly > Shizune

User avatar
Exbando
Posts: 122
Joined: Sun Feb 19, 2012 1:47 am
Location: America's High-Five

Re: A Familiar Face (Hanako Neutral End Fan Fiction)

Post by Exbando » Mon Dec 10, 2012 6:07 am

So it's been over six months. I've been working and going to school (one of my classes is a writing class, but it's essays and stuff), so I haven't had as much time to write this as I would have liked. On top of that, the computer that had the file broke. I can get the file, I just need some special cord to get it. I'm going to finish this story. I've changed some of my ideas for how the story will go, and I hope you'll like the story better when it gets there.

I'm sorry I haven't been keeping you guys updated. I'll get back to work as soon as I get the file back and classes are done for the semester. In the meantime, here is the bat dance:

Image
Hanako > Lilly = Emi > Shizune > Rin
Feeling like your heart is broken? Need to get it off your chest? Tell your story here
I have a fanfiction! It's pretty bad. I started another fanfic cause I'm stupid!

User avatar
Brogurt
Posts: 673
Joined: Sun Oct 09, 2011 7:07 pm
Contact:

Re: A Familiar Face (Hanako Neutral End Fan Fiction)

Post by Brogurt » Mon Dec 10, 2012 10:40 am

I see your bat dance and raise you a bat seizure
1327804031343.gif
1327804031343.gif (172.81 KiB) Viewed 2454 times

User avatar
OtakuNinja
Posts: 1417
Joined: Sat Jun 16, 2012 10:42 pm
Location: Sweden
Contact:

Re: A Familiar Face (Hanako Neutral End Fan Fiction)

Post by OtakuNinja » Mon Dec 10, 2012 1:38 pm

Exbando wrote: I'm going to finish this story.[/img]
Thank heavens for that! :D It's one of the better fanfics I've ever seen on there forums, despite the fake conclusion. ;)
Image
Emibro, Hanabro, [Lilly Lover], Rin Kin, Feminist, Two-timer

User avatar
mainframe004
Posts: 92
Joined: Sat Mar 03, 2012 3:51 pm
Location: Dark City
Contact:

Re: A Familiar Face (Hanako Neutral End Fan Fiction)

Post by mainframe004 » Tue Dec 11, 2012 3:07 am

Hooray for Exbando's return!


"We live as we do to show the world what it could be." ~ Machinae Supremacy - Overworld

Paths: Lilly > Hanako > Rin = Emi >>> Shizune
Characters: Hanako > Rin > Shizune > Emi > Lilly

User avatar
Exbando
Posts: 122
Joined: Sun Feb 19, 2012 1:47 am
Location: America's High-Five

Re: A Familiar Face (Hanako Neutral End Fan Fiction)

Post by Exbando » Sat Jan 26, 2013 3:57 am

Goddammit it's been over a month...ALRIGHT... Time to get back to work on this. As a way of essentially forcing me to keep with this new schedule I came up with, I'm going to tell you all what it is, and then you can nag me when I inevitably don't update. The next chapter is going up on Thursday the 31st. Updates will come every other Thursday until it's finished. This'll hopefully balance the quality vs quantity problem.
Brogurt wrote:I see your bat dance and raise you a bat seizure
I cannot beat that...
OtakuNinja wrote:
Exbando wrote: I'm going to finish this story.
Thank heavens for that! :D It's one of the better fanfics I've ever seen on there forums, despite the fake conclusion. ;)
I...ummm...what? I appreciate the compliment and all, but if this is one of the better fanfics, then you need to read other fanfics.
mainframe004 wrote:Hooray for Exbando's return!
:oops:
Hanako > Lilly = Emi > Shizune > Rin
Feeling like your heart is broken? Need to get it off your chest? Tell your story here
I have a fanfiction! It's pretty bad. I started another fanfic cause I'm stupid!

User avatar
OtakuNinja
Posts: 1417
Joined: Sat Jun 16, 2012 10:42 pm
Location: Sweden
Contact:

Re: A Familiar Face (Hanako Neutral End Fan Fiction)

Post by OtakuNinja » Sat Jan 26, 2013 6:07 am

Exbando wrote:
OtakuNinja wrote:
Exbando wrote: I'm going to finish this story.
Thank heavens for that! :D It's one of the better fanfics I've ever seen on there forums, despite the fake conclusion. ;)
I...ummm...what? I appreciate the compliment and all, but if this is one of the better fanfics, then you need to read other fanfics.
Apparently we don't have the same taste in fanfics. :lol: I tried reading those, but quit.
Image
Emibro, Hanabro, [Lilly Lover], Rin Kin, Feminist, Two-timer

User avatar
Exbando
Posts: 122
Joined: Sun Feb 19, 2012 1:47 am
Location: America's High-Five

Re: A Familiar Face (Hanako Neutral End Fan Fiction)

Post by Exbando » Thu Jan 31, 2013 6:56 am

Alright, it's been approximately...way too fucking long since the last update to the story. I have fulfilled the promise I made, though! It is the 31st, and as such, here is chapter 7!

Previous Chapter

--------------------------------

It seems like time is almost standing still. It feels like it’s been eight months since I heard the locks clicking inside the door. As Hanako opens the door, I half expect to be blinded by light and suddenly remember everything. If only I were that lucky. I start walking around the living room. Nothing that I see is familiar. I mean, I can recognize Ms. Satou’s and Hanako’s faces in various pictures, but I don’t remember taking them or anything. Hanako doesn’t need to ask if I can remember anything; she can see it in my face.

“I-I’ll show you where y-your room is…” Hanako says disappointedly. I can tell, just from her voice, that, not only was she hoping I would remember, but that she was somewhat expecting me to.

She leads me up the staircase near the door. On the second floor, I notice that there are three rooms. I start to open the door into the nearest room, but Hanako stops me.

“U-umm…that’s m-my r-room…” she says with slightly more awkwardness than I’m used to. So she lives here too…there’s only one reason I can come up with for that.

“Hanako?” I start, “Are we a, umm, you know, a-a thing?” Almost instantaneously, her face goes red.

“U-uh, u-umm, I…uh, I-I…”

“I…?”

“Ivegottogodosomething!” she exclaims, and then bolts off downstairs. I contemplate going after her, but I think she just needs some time to herself for right now.

Obviously, Hanako didn’t want me going into her room, so I respect her privacy and move down the hall to the next room. I open the door to find a very plain bedroom. There is a full-sized bed, but not much else. I enter the room, finding that this is not my room either, that is, unless I wear dresses on a regular basis.

I leave the bedroom, realizing that I shouldn’t have gone in there either. Closing the door, I go to the furthest door down the hallway. Unlike the first two rooms, however, the door to what I presume to be my bedroom is slightly ajar. Maybe I should have gone in here first?

When I enter the room, the first thing I notice is a large bookshelf filled to the brim with books. Looking at the books on the shelf, I see that some of them seem to be science textbooks. I pick one out and flip to a random page. As I flip through the book, a notecard falls out.

“Bad times have a scientific value. These are occasions a good learner would not miss.” “It is not length of life, but depth of life.” “It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them.” “Always do what you are afraid to do.” –Ralph Waldo Emerson

I must have written these quotes down for some reason. I stick the notecard in my pocket. If I can’t remember anything about this by tomorrow, I’ll ask Hanako about it. For now though, I’ll keep this to myself. I put the book back on the shelf. I look around the room for the first time. For the most part, it’s what I assume to be a typical bedroom. A twin-size bed, a nightstand, a closet.

One thing jumps out at me, though, even though it shouldn’t be that unusual. A wallet on the nightstand. I open the wallet to see my picture on a driver’s license. Hisao Nakai, 21 years old. Well, there’s two mysteries solved. How anti-climactic. Unfortunately, it doesn’t help me to remember anything before the accident, but at least Hanako and Ms. Satou can stop calling me “Friend.” I’m sure they’ll be relieved as well.

After deciding that there isn’t anything else of interest in here, I make my way back downstairs. Ms. Satou is talking with Hanako, though I can’t quite make out what they’re saying. Since I don’t want to look like I’m eavesdropping on what is most likely a private conversation, I go into the living room. When Hanako sees me, she looks down at the floor, her face going red. Ms. Satou must have heard come down, since she faces my general direction.

“So, uh, found my wallet. Had my driver’s license inside it.” I say, trying desperately to break the awkward silence. “It’s too bad it didn’t help me remember…” Any hopefulness in their faces was wiped away as quickly as it showed up.

Surprisingly, Hanako is the first to say something, “A-at least y-you know your n-name now.” At this, Ms. Satou nods in agreement.

“I think this calls for some tea to celebrate,” Ms. Satou says. She then enters the kitchen, leaving Hanako and me alone, and most likely knowing what I said upstairs.

I, not a big fan of these awkward silences, say, “Listen, sorry about what I said up there. I don’t know what I was thinking.”

“I-it’s not your f-fault,” she replies. “You just n-needed to know for s-sure, and I-I shouldn’t have o-overreacted.”

“But you were well within your rights to react like that,” I retort. “The question came out of nowhere, and I should have kept my mouth shut.”

“But I was g-going to show you your r-room, and t-then I just ran a-away, leaving you t-to fend for y-yourself,” she says. I guess she isn’t one to let anyone else take the blame for anything.

I don’t think either of us is going to win this argument, so I opt to change the subject. “If it makes you feel any better,” I start, “I didn’t go into your room.”

“T-thank you,” is all she manages to say. A couple more minutes of awkward silence pass, and Ms. Satou comes back with a tea tray.

Setting the tray down, Ms. Satou starts a new conversation, “So, Hisao, what do you think of the house?”

“Well,” I begin, “I wasn’t expecting an entire house. Maybe a dorm or an apartment, but definitely not a house. Especially not a house as nice as this one.”

“My, my! There’s no need to be so complimentative! There must be nicer houses around.” Ms. Satou says. Can no one that I know take a compliment?

“Well, if there are any, I wouldn’t know of them, and I don’t think I need to either,” I say, trying to lighten the mood somewhat. It seems to work, as even Hanako is cracking a small smile.

After a while, Hanako lets out a loud yawn. “Getting tired?” I ask, knowing that it’s already around 10 p.m.

“L-long day,” is all she says. Thinking about it, driving all the way to the hospital, picking me up, driving me back, just that alone would make someone tired.

“Perhaps it’s time we all went to sleep?” Ms. Satou suggests.

“Sounds like a plan,” I say.

“I-I’ll clean this u-up,” Hanako says.

“Would you? Thank you, Hanako.” Ms. Satou replies.

Standing up, I start heading toward the stairs. “Goodnight, Hanako, Ms. Satou.”

“Goodnight Hisao,” they both say in unison. Going back into my bedroom, I lay down on the bed. Even though I don’t remember sleeping on it, it still feels comfortable to me. It doesn’t take too long for me to fall asleep and end this long day.

--------------------------------

Next Chapter

Alright, I haven't had the time to proofread this, so there may be some of those errors strewn about. And, in case anyone wants to know where I got the quotes from, they are from here. The next chapter should be coming up on the 14th. No, it will not be some Valentine's Day thing. Hope you enjoyed this chapter, despite it being kinda boring.
Last edited by Exbando on Thu Feb 14, 2013 6:54 am, edited 1 time in total.
Hanako > Lilly = Emi > Shizune > Rin
Feeling like your heart is broken? Need to get it off your chest? Tell your story here
I have a fanfiction! It's pretty bad. I started another fanfic cause I'm stupid!

User avatar
Exbando
Posts: 122
Joined: Sun Feb 19, 2012 1:47 am
Location: America's High-Five

Re: A Familiar Face (Hanako Neutral End Fan Fiction)

Post by Exbando » Thu Feb 14, 2013 6:53 am

No replies after the last chapter? I guess that means I should just go ahead and post another chapter! This is the shortest chapter so far. Enjoy!

Previous Chapter

--------------------------------

The past week has been uneventful. Ms. Satou and Hanako are gone most of the day, most likely to work. When I asked if I had a job during our nightly tea-time, Hanako said that I only go to school, but I’m in the middle of a break, luckily enough. At least that explained the science textbooks in my room. I’ve been skimming some of them, and the information has been coming back fairly easily. I suppose it’s something.

As I head back to bed, my mind can’t stop. I’m constantly trying to remember anything about my past. All it’s done is make me lose sleep, though. When I get to my bed, I get an idea. Perhaps forcing it is the wrong way to go about this. I’ve been trying to force these memories back for two weeks, with no avail. I may as well not waste the energy and take them as they come. No matter how many times I tell myself this, it doesn’t stop my brain from digging around trying to find anything. On the other hand, I, at least, seem to be able to fall asleep faster than usual.

When I wake up, I look at the clock. 9:03 A.M. I missed seeing Hanako out the door. I’m usually awake earlier than this, but I suppose I needed the extra sleep. “Well,” I say to the empty air, “I can still see Lilly out the door.”

I head for the shower. Once the hot water starts to massage the top of my head, I realize what I had just said. I managed to remember Lilly’s name! How did I manage to remember? Maybe all the effort over the past two weeks finally paid off. If that’s the case, that seems like a lot of work for minimal results. Maybe I was right, and I just needed to not try too hard. That doesn’t make sense, though. I was still trying to dig up memories last night, just not as hard as usual.

I suppose, if anything, I can experiment. For all I know, though, this could be a massive coincidence. As I get out of the shower, I try thinking of a way to tell Lilly. When I found my name, I was fairly boring with telling the girls. I think that, since I actually remembered her name, I should make a bigger deal out of it.

I settle on a prank. Kind of. It’s mostly just messing with her, but something tells me she won’t mind. She seems like the type of person to do the same thing. As I step out of the bathroom, I nearly bump right into Lilly. “Sorry, Hisao,” she says.

“No, it’s my bad, Ms. Satou, I didn’t see you there,” I respond. As I say her name, her face drops slightly. It must be hard for her, not saying her own name, in her own house. All because I’m a dumb bastard. Well that’ll end later today.

“Well, if it’s any consolation, I didn’t see you either,” she retorts.

“But you have a decent excuse. I don’t,” I say.

“Well, whatever the case may be, I need to use the shower,” Lilly says with a somewhat playful, yet serious tone.

“Ah. Right,” is all I can think of to say. I step out of the bathroom and head to my bedroom to get dressed and ready for the day. I start skimming through the science books again, just for the hell of it. It just might help me remember something else after all. Though, remembering two different things on the same day would probably be pushing it, considering my luck so far.

Once that logic pierces through my thick skull, I go downstairs and make myself some breakfast. While I’m fixing myself some eggs, I hear Lilly come down the stairs. When she gets into the kitchen, I notice she’s wearing casual clothes. I can only assume that means she has the day off today. “Good morning,” I say somewhat cheerfully.

“Good morning, Hisao,” she responds. “Have you been able to remember anything?” She just cuts right to the chase.

“Well,” I start. Hopefully this all goes according to the plan I don’t actually have. “A name popped in my head, but I have no idea who it is.”

“What was the name?” Lilly asks, obviously intrigued.

I very quickly try to think of what Lilly could be short for. “I think it was Elizabeth or something like that.” Lilly’s face drops somewhat. She must have been hoping to remember her name, and Lilly must not be short for Elizabeth in her case. “Something wrong?” I ask, feigning ignorance.

“I’m just a little upset is all, but I don’t think there is anything you can do about it, Hisao,” she says with a hint of sadness in her voice. I decide I shouldn’t let this little prank go any farther.

“Well, you never know,” I begin, “I just might be able to help you, Lilly.” She perks up at the sound of her name, and then slowly begins to put the pieces together. A mixture of relief and anger appears on her face.

“You’re so mean, Hisao!” she exclaims, staring daggers at me. I’m glad I’m out of her reach, she seems like she would attack me if she had the chance right now.

“It was just a joke,” I say in my defense. Lilly immediately lightens up.

“So was I, Hisao,” she says while giggling, “I’m glad you remembered something else.” At this, she smiles a little more. When we have both settled down, we get to eating breakfast.

Today is going to be a good day. I can feel it.

--------------------------------

Another fairly boring chapter. The next update should be on the 28th. Oh yeah, and happy Valentine's Day.
Hanako > Lilly = Emi > Shizune > Rin
Feeling like your heart is broken? Need to get it off your chest? Tell your story here
I have a fanfiction! It's pretty bad. I started another fanfic cause I'm stupid!

User avatar
OtakuNinja
Posts: 1417
Joined: Sat Jun 16, 2012 10:42 pm
Location: Sweden
Contact:

Re: A Familiar Face (Hanako Neutral End Fan Fiction)

Post by OtakuNinja » Thu Feb 14, 2013 7:12 am

I didn't notice the last chapter was up. :o Well, now I could read two great chapters instead of one. Can't wait for the next one! :D
Image
Emibro, Hanabro, [Lilly Lover], Rin Kin, Feminist, Two-timer

User avatar
Exbando
Posts: 122
Joined: Sun Feb 19, 2012 1:47 am
Location: America's High-Five

Re: A Familiar Face (Hanako Neutral End Fan Fiction)

Post by Exbando » Thu Feb 14, 2013 11:45 pm

OtakuNinja wrote:I didn't notice the last chapter was up. :o Well, now I could read two great chapters instead of one. Can't wait for the next one! :D
Hmm...Maybe I shouldn't update at 6 in the morning...Thanks for the support!
Hanako > Lilly = Emi > Shizune > Rin
Feeling like your heart is broken? Need to get it off your chest? Tell your story here
I have a fanfiction! It's pretty bad. I started another fanfic cause I'm stupid!

LegyPlegy
Posts: 40
Joined: Sat Jan 05, 2013 12:42 am

Re: A Familiar Face (Hanako Neutral End Fan Fiction)

Post by LegyPlegy » Sat Feb 16, 2013 7:47 pm

Exbando wrote:“You’re so mean, Hisao!” she exclaims, staring daggers at me. I’m glad I’m out of her reach, she seems like she would attack me if she had the chance right now
I don't think this makes any sense, I mean she could have guessed his position but still...

Quite an interesting fan fiction, really... Now it's just up to you to decide whether this goes lilly-route or hanako-route (if you even go there)

But if you do go there....

-gathers all hanabros-

TO WAR GENTLEMEN!
Damn paper trails

User avatar
atw_ah
Posts: 54
Joined: Sun May 06, 2012 7:37 pm
Location: California, USA

Re: A Familiar Face (Hanako Neutral End Fan Fiction)

Post by atw_ah » Sat Feb 16, 2013 8:45 pm

It's a good story and I enjoy reading it but there's one thing that's been bugging me.
Exbando wrote: “Good morning, Hisao,” she responds. “Have you been able to remember anything?”
...
“What was the name?” Lilly asks, obviously intrigued.
...
“I’m just a little upset is all, but I don’t think there is anything you can do about it, Hisao,”
...
“You’re so mean, Hisao!” she exclaims, staring daggers at me.
...
“So was I, Hisao,” she says while giggling, “I’m glad you remembered something else.”
Lilly has the tendency to say 'Hisao' in almost all of her lines. I can ignore the 'Hisao' when they first bump into each other but the rest is a bit much. When it's one-on-one, the amount of times a person's name is said is near nonexistent. For instance, I see my friend each and every day because we carpool to school, but in this past week, I don't think I said her name more than five times.
It's automatically assumed that you're talking to the only other person near you so constantly saying each other's name is kinda silly (unless it's being done on purpose to put more emphasize on something).
KS: Bloodline The story of Yaso Atoza, 24 years after the events in KS.
Nomad: A Hanako Tale Hanako's search for her own personal paradise, ten years after KS.

Around The World, Always Honorable

My pastebin

User avatar
Carighan
Posts: 275
Joined: Sun Dec 23, 2012 3:14 pm

Re: A Familiar Face (Hanako Neutral End Fan Fiction)

Post by Carighan » Sat Feb 16, 2013 9:13 pm

I agree the staring-daggers is a bit weird, because even though it's about a facial expression - and please correct me if I'm wrong here, I have 0 experience being blind and none of my friends are :s - I doubt Lilly would really know much about which facial expression is used in which situation and how it is shown exactly.
The strength of heart to face oneself has been made manifest. The persona Carighan has appeared.

Post Reply