Sometime last night, I felt the need to type out the very beginning of something I hope to make an actual project. I can't say it's perfect at this point, but I'd say it's a fair starting point for something I've been mulling in my head the past week. I make no promise that I will have equal luck in advancing this short story in the near future; I was lucky to get this out in the short time between work and sleep. If i can manage to keep my brain in order like the hour that wrought this, then maybe I can get the nerve to continue. Also, for the sake of continuity, this takes place around two years and some months before Hisao's heart attack prior to attending the school himself. He's not in this, obviously. I've only taken small liberties so far, and will only push lightly into what's been established so far to avoid having to rework large portions of the story should it move forward. Enjoy. I might use this as an excuse to get back into plotting stories in general.
Also, I noticed that creating proper paragraph structure is unwieldy for me for some reason, so I've placed spaces to at least clarify paragraph separation. Also, I cannot into invisible text, so back to the far left they go as well. Already had to redo some typos 3 minutes in.
Questions for after reading
http://ks.renai.us/viewtopic.php?f=52&t ... =60#p90899
The Blind Leading The Blind -
This has been quite possibly the longest bus ride I've ever taken. I'd only brought so many books to occupy myself between stops, and my fellow passengers only idly chatter about in my direction; or, more accurately, past me to another in their group. I've remained undisturbed for the better part of two hours. It's not the longest travel time I've ever experienced but definitely seemed to stagnate quickly due to being the same vehicle throughout.
I probably should have brought something I haven't read before. I can only retread the same lines about climatology and barometric influence on wind and cloud patterns so many times without being surprised. I've always been more fond of learning aides than fiction. I'll need to check if the library there has something in the ways of science I can read.
The sound in this place is annoying and constant, making me skitter over my place several times out of frustration. Maybe it was my mistake to assume that these people would have gotten off on the many myriad of stops among this time. I'd hoped that to be the case, but to no avail. I'd say we've accumulated far more passengers than necessary. The smell of them all has addled me, and driven me to appropriate breathing at the off chance I might inhale some of it too harshly and suffocate. Ambling about on a page I'd already committed to memory, readjusting my fingers when the slopes of the road deter me, we finally slow to a halt.
I'd heard a small commotion above the usual noise, but hadn't placed why.
We've arrived at our destination, and a woman's voice breaks above the rest. I don't recognize it, so it must belong to one of the world-famous staff I've heard so much about.
"Please, like I asked before; I'd like to do one set of students at a time, if possible. Those of you who are here for the orientation... " There's a heavy shuffling of luggage behind me that overtakes the director's voice for a moment, rendering the final part of her speech somewhat moot. Thankfully, or not, one of my peers further toward the front asks for a recap of the event ahead. With an excuse to keep talking, the somewhat elderly voice continues once more.
"Welcome to Yamaku. We will be doing our orientations for the better part of today. We have a few students here that, I know, are eager to unpack. The few here for the specialty classes, this would be a good time to go ahead and get off the bus for now. We'll bring all your things to your dorms for you." A few groans ring out. "Remember; there are policies here that may seem more strict when it comes to possessions. Keep that in mind, as while we are first and foremost about education and support, we will not tolerate any forbidden items should we come across them."
More protests arise, but by this time, they've been taken by the sound of assorted bags. Unfortunately, that also implies that the people responsible for said bags have finally stirred after hours in a sweaty container, and the smell is atrocious. Eager for oxygen on a less pollutant level, I throw my book in my shoulder bag, ready my cane slightly against the aisle, and rise. A hand raps my shoulder, startling me slightly. A timid sound comes from my left, accompanied by the unmistakable rank of the trip.
"I guess this is it, Fumi."
I'll admit that I'm not overly confident about this, but Inoue's acknowledgement makes it somewhat softer. We're all in this together, I suppose, and even he isn't one to back away at this point. Then, like the chain gangs of old, we shuffle awkwardly down a seemingly complex straight line until we've hit our mark.
Our mark is refreshingly nice to take in after all that human musk.
"Wow," and other such words ar being tossed about like blame on a bad check. Many are commenting on the view. I cannot make such remarks, but the smell and the feel of this place... the quiet here... I could grow to be fond of it. At worst, I could be complacently accepting of it. It's been so long since the city was so far away. I'm just hoping the people here are better. I've little hope in city folk at this point, so a measurable difference in demographics would be appreciable. The worst part about the city isn't always its people however. We move as a group toward what I'm hoping to be an entrance, but stop short of what one student effortlessly breathes, "...The point of no return."
The air is so cool here, unlike anything I've witnessed in recent memory. Well, after the bus ride, any sort of air flow is welcome, I suppose. I take the time to breathe it all in and fan my shirt a bit. So long as I'm not blatantly flashing anyone, I think I'm alright with it. The season is finally being reflected by the weather, which seems to imply it might actually be rather cold sometime soon. I'd hope for a nice steady breeze, but the thought of cold rain in the midst of a breeze sets my hopes back to whence they came. The flowers are a heavy scent here. It's somewhat familiar. A pang in my chest accompanies the sudden realization that I've been to this sort of scenery before, and in a flush of melancholy, I attempt to suppress the thought.
"Naofumi Ka- kurei?"
I need to focus more. I'd nearly zoned out in my own swirl of memories. Still, it was the director tripping over my name that actually grabbed my attention in full.
"It's Naofumi Kurei, and yes," raising my hand for emphasis, "I am in fact here." She calls back to me, "Please find your bearings out here for a bit while the others go on ahead. There was a change of plans, and they're sending one of the Student Council members to catch up with you. Danbaki will stay with you until they arrive, so don't wander too far."
Danbaki. Great. I mouth such thoughts but keep them equally silent. Inoue sends me a farewell for now, and I can only listen while the crowd that was once so noisy fades off into nothing in my ears. I can hear the director the longest, until even her stern old voice becomes one with the light air here. The silence is welcoming. Only the sound of birds and light traffic far far away nestle in my brain as I lightly tap around the cement groundwork about me with my cane. The wall makes a very resistant sound when I find it, but yields little reverb. Such simple things keep me occupied. It's nice to not have anything expected of me, though it does have the unfortunate implication of making me all reflective. The silence helps me stay mostly calm, but the pleasant ambiance is unfortunately short-lived.
"Hey Nao-chan."
It's not Danbaki's fault he is mostly deaf, but it must be a horrendously nonchalant forgetfulness that he possesses about the fact. I turn my head in the most unmistakable direction, putting a pleasant face for show; he is a faculty here, even if it's his last year. "Yea, Danchi?" I stop my aimless prodding and lean against the nearby wall. Standing is welcome after the cramped seating I was previously encumbered with, but leaning is an acceptable solution to my laziness incentive. I give myself two points to the tally when my acquaintance continues.
"First of all, it's Danbaki. It would be Mister Danbaki if I were more formal than even that. Secondly, you need to relax. I can see your brain going into overdrive from here." The sound of his feet sliding across the curb in boredom makes this seem even more like he's just making conversation as opposed to actually reading my expression. Maybe I was making such a face before. I need to stay positive and stop letting my feelings get in the way of my functions.
"I'm alright," I utter mechanically. With nothing else to say, we fall into monotony. It isn't until I've counted each segment of sidewalk from the bus stop to entryway several times (there are only eleven, by the way) when a tapping other than my own permeates across the way. I reflexively pivot in the proper direction and attempt at pinpointing the source. I turn and wait patiently just as Danbaki makes it known that he has also realized that someone is fast approaching.
"Ah! Here we are!" He declares these things as if he's never in his life been first for anything, but claims wholeheartedly that he was always ahead of the trend. While I already know that the person approaching is also using a cane, I'm a little bothered by the fact that we were supposed to be met by a Student Council member, not a blind student. As I think far too deep into this, the tapping stops, just short of myself.
"Miss Satou, I'm glad you've arrived." He then speaks more quietly, possibly as a whisper. "Ms. Kurei isn't one to keep company". I instinctively give a slight scowl, but feeling it wasted on a blind girl and a large man aimed in what could very well be the wrong direction, I retract it as easily.
Wait.
Before I can gather my words for a question, I am mentally interrupted by Danbaki's immodest volume. "Naofumi, you should introduce yourself. It's only proper." After letting his sound taper from my mind to compose myself, I begin my meager interaction.
"Umm... Hi. Kurei. Naofumi Kurei. I'm a late transfer for the trimester and I guess we're going to be getting acquainted with the grounds today." For something so simple, that was painfully difficult to word out cleanly. It could easily be akin to my reading on the bumpier roads earlier, easily broken at any moment by the whim of the situation.
"Good afternoon, Ms. Kurei. My name is Lilly Satou and I will be the one to show you around Yamaku today. I hope you like it here. It's a busy time right now in the dormitories, but we should be fine getting around the campus." I get the feeling that she has bowed to me, just by the tone of her voice. Having not done the same, I bow as well. I then immediately ponder why I had just taken part in a ritual that neither of us has any feedback from whatsoever.
A gruff sound that I'm hoping was natural comes from Danbaki before being followed up by his usual forte assault. "I'd forgotten about the renovations. Are they still at it over there?" I can hear him fiddling with his keys in his pocket again. He's probably fallen into small talk once more, or he's bemused that he can even make out the sound.
Unlikely, however. He's admitted to purposely neglecting his hearing aide and I can recall several queries for students to repeat themselves en route to this mountain top campus. When he arrived at my previous school with another staff member, whom I would later learn was the instructor for the blind specialty class, he was sure to keep his ear piece in its proper place and volume. At no meeting since have I heard him speak at modest decibel level, but I might be too sensitive. It is one of the few senses I use for the sake of direction and I'd like it to be as unintruded as possible.
"My my, yes. they're almost done with the boy's dorms, but unfortunately, half of the girl's rooms are still compartmentalized." This girl is my guide? She's the Student Council member? This really is a completely different kind of school. I was relegated to simply being a decoration in my old school, so this is quite a remarkable thing. I was a very valuable decoration though; a fair sum of yen in bonus funding worth of decoration - none of which was implemented before my leave of their cirriculum. It was definitely not their intent to educate me, moreso than keep me enrolled for the sake of a write-off of some kind and free money. The fact that such an undervalued person at my old school could be in some position of delegacy or possibly actual power is striking.
I can't quite make what her responsibilities really could entail, but maybe this is less complicated than I'm making it out to be. Maybe the Student Council is more symbolic; a show piece for the school to brag about. Perhaps their only duty is to meet the new students and prevent them from fleeing. Granted, I was allowed to arrive several days earlier than most students for the sake of getting used to the area. Since she's my guide, I suppose I should be ready to wander aimlessly for entirely too long like my last school's orientation. I wonder if the other members do such a thing, guiding new blood to their doom - a member representing each disability accepted here. There's probably a deaf kid in it as well, for the sake of 'diversity'.
Specialty schools frighten me. I know about this place. I know what kinds of people are here. I know there are a lot of students here who will not see their 50th or even their 20th birthday. But I also know that Yamaku is not the school I was at prior. That alone gives me at least enough strength to not protest giving it a shot. It's not like I'll be able to do much in life anyway, given as I have trouble even getting around, despite my best efforts.
I can hear students coming up from the hill near us, passing just by me as they return to their temporary home. I don't know if I want to stay here. I realize I'm not paying much attention right now, and their conversation continues in my absence. I've never been comfortable speaking with other blind people. it's hard enough having to gauge intent based on one sense, but inarguably more difficult to filter. Perhaps I just expect dishonesty. I've been lied to a lot.
"Ms. Kurei?"
Damn that calm and collected voice. She's so damned proper. Maybe I'm just upset about getting lost in thought again. She means well, I can tell, and keeps asking me about the trip and what expectations I have going here. I tell her that I'm not very hopeful about my own abilities, but am grateful for the change in location. After a small cross chat with Danbaki to assure him of my survival, he bids us goodbye and leaves us by ourselves. Again, I am unsure what to say. I'm not very good with social situations. I tend to have too many things going through my head.
"Well," she says to me, breaking what would have amounted to an abyss of silence on my part. A *clack* of what I assume is her own mobility cane snaps in front of me and drags *whhissssp* to what I'd guess is her front. "Shall we head inside? We have a few days before your first class and you're allowed free roam until then to get used to your surroundings. The layout's mostly fair, but the dorms are going to be a problem." She seems to mutter something under her breath before resuming what I assume is the same thought. "I don't actually stay in the dorms, myself, so we might both need help when we get there." A sudden burst of wind surprises me. I catch a weak hint of vanilla in the air. Is it her? "Are you ready?" The floral smell surrounding us travels on the breeze and although it's quite comforting, I can't help but feel I'm in over my head. I suppose I should say something, anything as a response.
"Okay." Nice and simple. Effective. Should have said 'Yes' instead, as it was definitely a question requiring confirmation of intent and not a state of being. Overthinking this simplest of grammatical issue, I ready myself for the trip, line the cane to get into stride and prepare for the worst. My belt gets in the way when I prop it and adjust accordingly before giving the 'all clear'. "Lead the way, and I'll be..." Something makes me pause. I'm really not good at maneuvering myself outdoors. "...right behind you."
She laughs quietly. She's so girly and proper, it's alarming. Am I going to be expected to adhere to this sort of standard? I'd hope not. I'm guessing she's wearing the uniform as well, which is a dumb idea to question since she's apparently on school business. I don't think I like the idea of wearing a skirt all the time, especially as the season comes round in full later on this month. Keeping my thoughts entirely to myself, I follow the sound of her tapping and do the same. I then cross the threshold into my new and hopefully better life. I make no promises to myself, but release the last doubtful sigh I'd been suppressing since the moment I woke up today.
And so it begins. The blind leads the blind into uncharted territory. This is going to suck.
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
i replaced a bunch of not-capital letters with capital letters and made some words other words
other than that, this hasn't been edited much, just several times since i obviously can't read the whole thing in the edit window like a normal person and hit submit ONCE
The Blind Leading The Blind
The Blind Leading The Blind
Last edited by darkmelee on Tue Apr 03, 2012 2:20 am, edited 16 times in total.
-
Anon4327690722435
Re: The Blind Leading The Blind
Interesting. I look forward to seeing more of this.
Why we wait for the next update, the above sentence started me wondering about something: are tactile computer monitors for blind people manufactured?
Why we wait for the next update, the above sentence started me wondering about something: are tactile computer monitors for blind people manufactured?
Re: The Blind Leading The Blind
I liked this so far, Fumi seems interesting (acting almost as an opposite to Lilly) and it could be interesting to see where this goes.
-
Guest
Re: The Blind Leading The Blind
The title is leading me to expect a bad end. Still want to see what happens next though.
Re: The Blind Leading The Blind
touch screens can be used alongside text-readers if i remember correctly. not truly tactile, but audible feedback allows you to 'feel' around a page so long as the text itself is proper code and not an image/background. truly raised textures aren't available outside closed development circles, i think, though i might be wrong there. there's probably someone out there with something workable by now, but i'd be worried about resolution not being detailed enough or fast enough to be effective. i know haptic gloves (and even body suits) are in development, but i don't think the sightless were their intended audience, but it brings a lot of possibilities outside of just VR when it could also be applied to highlighting specific points on a touch screen...Anon4327690722435 wrote:Interesting. I look forward to seeing more of this.
Why we wait for the next update, the above sentence started me wondering about something: are tactile computer monitors for blind people manufactured?
i'm still debating how fast i want this thing to move, and i don't want to rush into it, so everyone hang tight.
also, thank you all for being at least intrigued so far. that does raise my spirits a bit.
Re: The Blind Leading The Blind
CONTINUED -
Maybe I'm in the wrong mindset. After the travesties of adolescence and years of barely getting by, I may have the chance to pick myself up and move forward. it's frightening, but I should at least make some sort of effort to play along, no matter how deep the ensuing plot may go. Besides, I could use a fresh start somewhere new.
She wastes no time moving forward herself, and it takes some effort to keep within what I used to refer to as 'clicking distance'. My first cane trainer was like this. It infuriated me as he was constantly taunting me to move faster, to maintain the headway and clear the gap between us. By the time I could keep at it, he would turn a corner and go into hiding, leaving me stranded for a bit. It may be good logic to be able to find your own way on a trip like that, but simply abandoning your stead and forcing them to track your person down in unfamiliar scenarios can be terrifying.
In fact, I never got over that sort of scene. Every time I was required to venture outside of school grounds and even my old housing, I would feel as if one wrong step would end me. It's a logical fear. Maybe it's a childish one, like a young boy afraid of the depths of the basement merely because he's never tested his luck down there. Basements don't frighten me. I've bested my share of supposedly dark and scary places with little resistance. The chances would be in the boy's favor, as they always were in my experiences. No, it's the wide open dioramas of sprawling city streets, with countless pedestrians that clog them. That frightens me. Public display of my own inabilities. Humility may be the worst within my rogues gallery of insecurities. I suppose I have other weaknesses. Yes; I definitely have other weaknesses, and I'm really hoping I'm not the only one here with similar issues.
She's slowing, thank all the deities.
"I'm terribly sorry for rushing you along, but the classes should be changing any minute and I was hoping we could make it to a place to wait while the crowds are out. Luckily, it seems we've arrived." She must have a retractable or foldable cane; I can hear the parts rattling together as they are rearranged into a smaller form. Feeling the bench with my own, I take my seat as she has. Since my cane is not of the retractable sort, I balance it upright, my thighs holding it in place while my hands grasp it like it's my only link to the world.
It might be, actually.
Dammit.
"Sorry..." I say, again realizing that I've dwelt far too long in silence. I lean my head into the textured grip of the cane. "I'm not very good at conversation. I get caught up on little things and just sorta blurt whatever's necessary to get it over with." I'm being honest, no matter how apathetic it may come off as. I imagine Lilly to be the kind of person to keep a conversation going, adding a piece of her mind when needed. Maybe she's more the kind of person to understand when simply not speaking is enough. I can never decide which is better for myself and tend to just pick one or the other. Coming to this idea, I have no idea how consistent my personality must be to others.
She makes an understanding sound, confirming that she definitely is one to keep an exchange in good standings. "It's quite alright. You've no need to change your behavior on my accord." Lilly sets her thoroughly folded tool onto the bench. It makes a rather unremarkable sound when it's not extended like before. I absentmindedly move my own cane away, then bring it into the bench's front, just by my knees. Maybe it's our combined weight holding it still. I hear bells. This must be what she was referring to, and mere seconds after the tone, I can already make out a sea of sounds coming our way. As it grows to a crescendo, I can't help but tense up.
These people, they must see me. All these entities surrounding us, possibly looking us over, no need for them to ascertain why we belong here. Maybe they know Lilly, but they don't know me. I must look out of place with my black slacks and red polo shirt. I was never intending to impress, but now that I'm so exposed, it makes me uneasy. I know I've been told I'm pretty and that I'm good enough from a physical standpoint, but I can't help but feel all the eyes treading me in a way that I can't return. It's unfair. I've no symbol of this school on my person whatsoever. I cower slightly and pretend like I'm checking the contents of my carry bag. I don't know why, but the cascade of footsteps remind me of a waterfall, like I'm barely preventing myself form falling over the edge of it. I like the rain, but deep water can cause me to go catatonic. I've noticed that my back is completely up against the bench at this point.
Amidst this blockade of sound, she actually wants to talk.
"If you don't mind my asking, what were your studies like at your old school?" I'm not really sure how to answer this without sounding pathetic. Actually, 'pathetic' may be the word I'm looking for. I decide to soften it. She doesn't need to know specifics. I use this as an excuse to get my mind back on even ground. I've only just noticed as well that she may be taller than I'd originally conceived, as her soothing voice is coming from a level just above my own. I'm rather short, so this is no major surprise.
"I don't really remember much early on, but my lessons were... passably functional." 'Minimal' is being generous. The last few years have had many days between them where I would simply sit and listen. Little to no help would come if my tutor or assistant were absent from their position. In fact, even what interaction they made with me made it obvious I was an obligation - a liability even. "I guess you could say that I didn't get the education I needed in school. I got into reading for a bit, and took to teaching myself what the other students were learning, not what I was being taught directly."
That's something I was proud of. No matter how derivative and mediocre my learnings in that school system, I came out on top as at least somewhat capable when it came to what was necessary to move on. I'm not sure if it garnered respect, but it was something I'd achieved on my own merits, and that deserves mention regardless.
Lilly asks me, "Were they proud of you? It seems as if they weren't properly equipped to deal with the situation, but do you think they appreciated you efforts?"
"Honestly", I reply, 'I'll never know." I hadn't really looked into the situation. To be fair, I don't think I asked many questions back then either. It's possible that they weren't prepared to deal with my situation. Much of the staff avoided me. Classmates who didn't mock me or tease me would try to simply stay out of my business entirely. I'm glad I got away, regardless. The teasing became a bit much by the end.
"That's a shame. I've never been to a public school, or at least I don't recall it at the moment. My sister and I attended a Catholic school some distance away from here. They treated me like any other student and helped me grow to be strong and reliable. Neglecting your studies there would constitute," she shuffles in her seat, "unreasonably harsh consequences."
I laugh a bit at the thought of this dainty thing being threatened by a nun who, for all accounts of this being my imagination, is wielding a sturdy oak paddle and a holy bible. "Were you familiar with such consequences?"
"My, my, no. I was a proper lady."
Shoot.
"But I feared that my sister, Akira, had grown rather fond of some of them..."
And then my smile's back again. "Should you be telling me that?" I laugh out with little concern.
"Why?" she asked. "It's lightened the mood, hasn't it? And if you'd notice; it's a lot quieter now. No one else is present to overhear." Coming to, I realize that she's right. The sea of people has ebbed to a trickle, with only a scant few voices remaining in either direction of me. My grip on the cane has slacked as well, but my fingers still fidget with the strap. I'm still on edge, but I do feel better now. The bells return to signify the official start to classes. I sigh heavily before they finish.
"You don't do well in crowds, I hear. Is that correct, Naofumi?" For someone lacking sight, she's very perceptive. She's probably just been talking to those around me, I would think.
"Did Danbaki or Mrs. Nobatou tell you that?" I move my head about to take in the grassy smell carried on the wind. This quiet and peaceful location is definitely preferred. "Either would be right on the money. It's not so much the crowds themselves. I don't blame them for being out and about and doing what anyone should be able to do." Anyone but me. "It just gets to me, not being able to move as freely." Or at all. "Even by myself, I still get -" I 'm not sure how to follow that up, or even what I intended to tell her. I get frustrated, angry, sad, all manners of things that would be inappropriate for this casual talk. "...nevermind. Forget I started on that." I can almost feel the disappointment on her end, but I'm not about to pour my heart to someone I've only just met. "So, should we get going? I'm wholly ready to get hopelessly lost here."
I stand preemptively. I know she just wants me to open up a little and feel like I can relax here, but I can't relax in earnest. I have too many things in the back of my mind that flitter here and there at all times of the day. It seems she's not one to argue with keeping to a schedule, and she declares that we can easily make the rounds at more of an amble now that classes have begun. Reassembling her cane with speed I did not expect from such a calm and collected person, she rights herself also and we continue our trek across the court. After a relatively short distance, the *clack* *slide* sound of her movements give way to a much less pronounced *clop*. In my mind, *clop* is associated with concrete steps and rampways. I'm assuming there are ramps somewhere near our position, given the nature of the place.
"Naofumi, we're here. Mind the steps now, and I'll walk you through the rest."
After pushing a loose bang from my face, I heed her directions and make my way to the door, but she calls me further to my left. "There's a sign here," she says. I'm now close enough to her that she politely asks for my hand. Long slender fingers trace my knuckles and lead my arm up the smooth wall to a placard, noticably raised. Once she's sure I've found it, her grip loosens and I'm free to read the fine braille print on it's lower portion.
[Yamaku Academic Headquarters]
"This is the North building. It's where many classes are for most students. Some of them are being moved around right now while everything's being brought up to date. Our classroom is on the first floor, and there are classrooms for each year on their respective floors. If there weren't so many students who are sightless, or with poor or partial vision, then they wouldn't need so much space for us all."
I knew I wouldn't be the only blind girl in the whole school. I'm not that foolish, yet, I hadn't given as much thought to exactly how many other students I would actually be learning with. A whole class of people who can't see straight or at all. It was a pain in the ass just witnessing normal students in normal classes, being that I clearly wasn't normal. I'm not sure how I feel about being one of many.
One of many.
That's a depressing thought, that there would actually be enough blind students to require multiple classrooms just to fit them all. Then again, the entire facility caters to disabilities of all types, except (I think) mental. The fact that there are enough handicapped teens to constitute this school's existence is depressing in of itself. But maybe that's the wrong idea. Perhaps Yamaku doesn't exist because the kids just happened to have unfortunate luck. Maybe it's more like the school is there to treat them with some sense of normality, just outside of normal society.
Wow. I can take anything and make it sound miserable. Still, the thought that I'm in the same boat, or other such phrases, as so many others makes it easier for me to think about blending in better. I could probably stand to show some drive as well.
"Shall we go in, then?" Lilly softly asks me.
I sigh halfheartedly, "Do we have to?"
Drive should wait until I'm damn ready.
Maybe I'm in the wrong mindset. After the travesties of adolescence and years of barely getting by, I may have the chance to pick myself up and move forward. it's frightening, but I should at least make some sort of effort to play along, no matter how deep the ensuing plot may go. Besides, I could use a fresh start somewhere new.
She wastes no time moving forward herself, and it takes some effort to keep within what I used to refer to as 'clicking distance'. My first cane trainer was like this. It infuriated me as he was constantly taunting me to move faster, to maintain the headway and clear the gap between us. By the time I could keep at it, he would turn a corner and go into hiding, leaving me stranded for a bit. It may be good logic to be able to find your own way on a trip like that, but simply abandoning your stead and forcing them to track your person down in unfamiliar scenarios can be terrifying.
In fact, I never got over that sort of scene. Every time I was required to venture outside of school grounds and even my old housing, I would feel as if one wrong step would end me. It's a logical fear. Maybe it's a childish one, like a young boy afraid of the depths of the basement merely because he's never tested his luck down there. Basements don't frighten me. I've bested my share of supposedly dark and scary places with little resistance. The chances would be in the boy's favor, as they always were in my experiences. No, it's the wide open dioramas of sprawling city streets, with countless pedestrians that clog them. That frightens me. Public display of my own inabilities. Humility may be the worst within my rogues gallery of insecurities. I suppose I have other weaknesses. Yes; I definitely have other weaknesses, and I'm really hoping I'm not the only one here with similar issues.
She's slowing, thank all the deities.
"I'm terribly sorry for rushing you along, but the classes should be changing any minute and I was hoping we could make it to a place to wait while the crowds are out. Luckily, it seems we've arrived." She must have a retractable or foldable cane; I can hear the parts rattling together as they are rearranged into a smaller form. Feeling the bench with my own, I take my seat as she has. Since my cane is not of the retractable sort, I balance it upright, my thighs holding it in place while my hands grasp it like it's my only link to the world.
It might be, actually.
Dammit.
"Sorry..." I say, again realizing that I've dwelt far too long in silence. I lean my head into the textured grip of the cane. "I'm not very good at conversation. I get caught up on little things and just sorta blurt whatever's necessary to get it over with." I'm being honest, no matter how apathetic it may come off as. I imagine Lilly to be the kind of person to keep a conversation going, adding a piece of her mind when needed. Maybe she's more the kind of person to understand when simply not speaking is enough. I can never decide which is better for myself and tend to just pick one or the other. Coming to this idea, I have no idea how consistent my personality must be to others.
She makes an understanding sound, confirming that she definitely is one to keep an exchange in good standings. "It's quite alright. You've no need to change your behavior on my accord." Lilly sets her thoroughly folded tool onto the bench. It makes a rather unremarkable sound when it's not extended like before. I absentmindedly move my own cane away, then bring it into the bench's front, just by my knees. Maybe it's our combined weight holding it still. I hear bells. This must be what she was referring to, and mere seconds after the tone, I can already make out a sea of sounds coming our way. As it grows to a crescendo, I can't help but tense up.
These people, they must see me. All these entities surrounding us, possibly looking us over, no need for them to ascertain why we belong here. Maybe they know Lilly, but they don't know me. I must look out of place with my black slacks and red polo shirt. I was never intending to impress, but now that I'm so exposed, it makes me uneasy. I know I've been told I'm pretty and that I'm good enough from a physical standpoint, but I can't help but feel all the eyes treading me in a way that I can't return. It's unfair. I've no symbol of this school on my person whatsoever. I cower slightly and pretend like I'm checking the contents of my carry bag. I don't know why, but the cascade of footsteps remind me of a waterfall, like I'm barely preventing myself form falling over the edge of it. I like the rain, but deep water can cause me to go catatonic. I've noticed that my back is completely up against the bench at this point.
Amidst this blockade of sound, she actually wants to talk.
"If you don't mind my asking, what were your studies like at your old school?" I'm not really sure how to answer this without sounding pathetic. Actually, 'pathetic' may be the word I'm looking for. I decide to soften it. She doesn't need to know specifics. I use this as an excuse to get my mind back on even ground. I've only just noticed as well that she may be taller than I'd originally conceived, as her soothing voice is coming from a level just above my own. I'm rather short, so this is no major surprise.
"I don't really remember much early on, but my lessons were... passably functional." 'Minimal' is being generous. The last few years have had many days between them where I would simply sit and listen. Little to no help would come if my tutor or assistant were absent from their position. In fact, even what interaction they made with me made it obvious I was an obligation - a liability even. "I guess you could say that I didn't get the education I needed in school. I got into reading for a bit, and took to teaching myself what the other students were learning, not what I was being taught directly."
That's something I was proud of. No matter how derivative and mediocre my learnings in that school system, I came out on top as at least somewhat capable when it came to what was necessary to move on. I'm not sure if it garnered respect, but it was something I'd achieved on my own merits, and that deserves mention regardless.
Lilly asks me, "Were they proud of you? It seems as if they weren't properly equipped to deal with the situation, but do you think they appreciated you efforts?"
"Honestly", I reply, 'I'll never know." I hadn't really looked into the situation. To be fair, I don't think I asked many questions back then either. It's possible that they weren't prepared to deal with my situation. Much of the staff avoided me. Classmates who didn't mock me or tease me would try to simply stay out of my business entirely. I'm glad I got away, regardless. The teasing became a bit much by the end.
"That's a shame. I've never been to a public school, or at least I don't recall it at the moment. My sister and I attended a Catholic school some distance away from here. They treated me like any other student and helped me grow to be strong and reliable. Neglecting your studies there would constitute," she shuffles in her seat, "unreasonably harsh consequences."
I laugh a bit at the thought of this dainty thing being threatened by a nun who, for all accounts of this being my imagination, is wielding a sturdy oak paddle and a holy bible. "Were you familiar with such consequences?"
"My, my, no. I was a proper lady."
Shoot.
"But I feared that my sister, Akira, had grown rather fond of some of them..."
And then my smile's back again. "Should you be telling me that?" I laugh out with little concern.
"Why?" she asked. "It's lightened the mood, hasn't it? And if you'd notice; it's a lot quieter now. No one else is present to overhear." Coming to, I realize that she's right. The sea of people has ebbed to a trickle, with only a scant few voices remaining in either direction of me. My grip on the cane has slacked as well, but my fingers still fidget with the strap. I'm still on edge, but I do feel better now. The bells return to signify the official start to classes. I sigh heavily before they finish.
"You don't do well in crowds, I hear. Is that correct, Naofumi?" For someone lacking sight, she's very perceptive. She's probably just been talking to those around me, I would think.
"Did Danbaki or Mrs. Nobatou tell you that?" I move my head about to take in the grassy smell carried on the wind. This quiet and peaceful location is definitely preferred. "Either would be right on the money. It's not so much the crowds themselves. I don't blame them for being out and about and doing what anyone should be able to do." Anyone but me. "It just gets to me, not being able to move as freely." Or at all. "Even by myself, I still get -" I 'm not sure how to follow that up, or even what I intended to tell her. I get frustrated, angry, sad, all manners of things that would be inappropriate for this casual talk. "...nevermind. Forget I started on that." I can almost feel the disappointment on her end, but I'm not about to pour my heart to someone I've only just met. "So, should we get going? I'm wholly ready to get hopelessly lost here."
I stand preemptively. I know she just wants me to open up a little and feel like I can relax here, but I can't relax in earnest. I have too many things in the back of my mind that flitter here and there at all times of the day. It seems she's not one to argue with keeping to a schedule, and she declares that we can easily make the rounds at more of an amble now that classes have begun. Reassembling her cane with speed I did not expect from such a calm and collected person, she rights herself also and we continue our trek across the court. After a relatively short distance, the *clack* *slide* sound of her movements give way to a much less pronounced *clop*. In my mind, *clop* is associated with concrete steps and rampways. I'm assuming there are ramps somewhere near our position, given the nature of the place.
"Naofumi, we're here. Mind the steps now, and I'll walk you through the rest."
After pushing a loose bang from my face, I heed her directions and make my way to the door, but she calls me further to my left. "There's a sign here," she says. I'm now close enough to her that she politely asks for my hand. Long slender fingers trace my knuckles and lead my arm up the smooth wall to a placard, noticably raised. Once she's sure I've found it, her grip loosens and I'm free to read the fine braille print on it's lower portion.
[Yamaku Academic Headquarters]
"This is the North building. It's where many classes are for most students. Some of them are being moved around right now while everything's being brought up to date. Our classroom is on the first floor, and there are classrooms for each year on their respective floors. If there weren't so many students who are sightless, or with poor or partial vision, then they wouldn't need so much space for us all."
I knew I wouldn't be the only blind girl in the whole school. I'm not that foolish, yet, I hadn't given as much thought to exactly how many other students I would actually be learning with. A whole class of people who can't see straight or at all. It was a pain in the ass just witnessing normal students in normal classes, being that I clearly wasn't normal. I'm not sure how I feel about being one of many.
One of many.
That's a depressing thought, that there would actually be enough blind students to require multiple classrooms just to fit them all. Then again, the entire facility caters to disabilities of all types, except (I think) mental. The fact that there are enough handicapped teens to constitute this school's existence is depressing in of itself. But maybe that's the wrong idea. Perhaps Yamaku doesn't exist because the kids just happened to have unfortunate luck. Maybe it's more like the school is there to treat them with some sense of normality, just outside of normal society.
Wow. I can take anything and make it sound miserable. Still, the thought that I'm in the same boat, or other such phrases, as so many others makes it easier for me to think about blending in better. I could probably stand to show some drive as well.
"Shall we go in, then?" Lilly softly asks me.
I sigh halfheartedly, "Do we have to?"
Drive should wait until I'm damn ready.
Last edited by darkmelee on Fri Jan 13, 2012 8:46 pm, edited 2 times in total.
Re: The Blind Leading The Blind
I like this, and along with no (that I noticed) grammar or text mistakes this makes for a good read.
Aww, didn't think of that. I really hope not...Guest wrote:The title is leading me to expect a bad end. Still want to see what happens next though.
Re: The Blind Leading The Blind
I don't see why.Guest wrote:The title is leading me to expect a bad end. Still want to see what happens next though.
Though that is generally how the phrase is used it just seems to be a statement of fact in this case.-
Guest
Re: The Blind Leading The Blind
CONTINUED -
Following my guide's lead, I take the first step into what may become familiar grounds over the next several years of my life. School buildings, I can handle. For some reason, I do very well indoors. I would think it was due to the proximity of walls, but sometimes I feel that I might prefer the thought of there being definite ends to every path inside.
Go too far; wall or door. Trace the wall until you find a door. Forget where you are? Everything tends to be marked accordingly in braille at every opportunity to veer off course. Even my old school, inadequate as it was, still followed universal guidelines like this. Even in the rush of changing classes (which I was permitted an opportune head start on the matter), I could at least hug the wall and avoid dealing with the traffic. No doubt did I gather attention, however. I know I did.
Maybe it will be easier to hide in the open now that I'm just one of the crowd.
"Are you ready, Fumi? I'm going to show you to our class first, then we can continue our tour of the campus."
I can hear the students in their respective rooms making only minor fusses. it's a much more collected atmosphere than I'm used to. Focused, even. either students here are very vigilant, or punishment for outbursts are exponentially more potent.
I need to remind myself not to cause any trouble while I'm here.
I tell her that I’m ready and we’ve already begun the walk. Our canes sync up a bit as we walk, unintentionally, but I notice it. I like rhythms, but consciously force myself to keep out of time for the sake of my own mobility. I don’t need to forget which sound is clearly mine. The collective tappings echo quite loudly in the halls. I’d think Lilly is aware of it, or maybe it’s not near as pronounced as I think it is. I have sensitive hearing, I think. It gives me a good ear for music and such, but inconvenient flak gets in my head too easily.
She insists I read every room title as we go on our way, probably to help me get oriented. this is going to be a routine I follow every day, so I should do my best to be able to trace my destination. Luckily, our class is relatively close on this floor and gives me a flush of relief knowing that I won’t have too much ground to cover each day. As I read the room aloud, Lilly gets the idea that I’m up to sped and lightly knocks on the door, interrupting whatever light chatter was going on before - save for one voice.
“Ah!. Naofumi, you’ve made it on time!” The sound of a notebook being flipped through - and quickly closed - permeates the lull. “Wait right there a moment.”
And so we wait in the doorway patiently as whoever this is busies with whatever duties they attend to. This doesn’t sound like the person who was at my other school. The teacher who visited me had a much more spirited voice. This sounds more like a student my own age or a little over. Do they have student teaching programs? That actually sounds kind of neat. Maybe if I can hammer down on my history or something, I should try to give that a go.
The sound of desks being rearranged distracts me. we’ll probably never do anything like that in our class. The room’s probably been exactly the same every year for the sake of students being able to get around. I do fine indoors, but busy rooms... areas with dozens of desks or workstations, with people all rolling over each other to get to their personal space. That take time to remember completely, and getting around would most likely be tenfold the complication with a whole room of people like me who need to feel their way around. My old school always had me in the very back. It was very easy to find every day, in every classroom, and they allowed me to use my cane at all times on the property.
Footsteps approach us form within, followed by the insistence that we back away a little. We comply, and the door is shut, preventing our conversation from being idly eavesdropped, though I highly doubt it’s anything important. it’s probably more out of courtesy for the students inside the room than those of us in the hall.
“Hello there. My name is Eiko Tokoi, and I’m filling in for the week.”
Well, that explains a lot. Her voice is so playful, like she was just finishing a game of cards on a positive trend. I greet her as well, making sure to bow on cue, mentally compensating for my informal greeting to miss Satou earlier. Lilly follows suit, making it obvious now that she’s never met this person either. Thinking back, wouldn’t Lilly have been in school today if it weren’t for me? Does she get special privileges for being on the Student Council?
“Our usual instructor’s been dealing with some family issues and hasn’t returned from Osaka yet. She said it would only be a few days, but it’s already looking like it’ll be a few more.”
The fact that she doesn’t recant her language tells me a lot about how comfortable she is here. Most people would have followed that up with an apology, but she barely takes a moment to think before she talks again.
“Um, it’s probably not the best time for her to get to know the room layout, since it’s in session and all, but tomorrow’s a half day and I was thinking we could just leave the room open a few hours afterward. You know, so she can wander around and figure it all out. I have a note - ” I hear a zipper opening with a quick *vvzziip*. I hope she has a purse or something, modesty in our presence or not. I’ll admit, it would be awful forward of her considering we’ve just met.
I catch a heavy whiff of makeup, a powdery dry scent with only a fragment of strawberry to it. Damn. Purse wins.
“Here we go, “ telling no one in particular. “It says here that you already have a desk assigned for you and that we’ve received your books already. It says something about you needing to check in with the nurse later and Lilly’s gonna hafta show you where Mrs. Nobatou’s office is. “ She twirls the paper around. “There’s a scribble on the back reminding me to tell you that your medication isn’t here yet and that you need to bring that up with the nurse when you see him.”
I didn’t want anyone else to hear any of that. I didn’t want Lilly to know that. I didn’t want this girl I’ve never met before knowing that. Maybe they don’t take it to heart like I am, but some sort of confidentiality is implied when it comes to medical issues. I know they’re not going to ask, but I know must be thinking about it, even as a mental aside.
What’s wrong with the new girl?
Is she sick?
Why is she meeting with the councilor?
Does she have... problems?
Who the hell gave them the right to even mention that?
“Umm, are you alright?”
I must have been making a face again. I keep my protestation silent once more and recompose myself. Not wanting to create a scene, I simply brush it off and let them know that “I’m fine.” It’s the most common lie in society, next to declarations of love and new years’ resolutions. One more on top of billions shouldn’t hurt anything. I’ve probably already drawn more attention to myself than necessary and made it even worse. Now they’re bound to be trying to figure me out, like it’s that easy. Like they could.
Lilly picks up for me and asks about making up what she’s missed so far. They’re only listening to a presentation right now, so it’s not a big deal to her if Lilly picks up a copy of the CD before the end of classes today. I have a feeling she’s not the kind of person to bring up uncomfortable topics. She seems too nice. well, she acts nice. People are free to act one way and think freely in another. It’s the sole freedom that takes the most effort to break; the ability to imagine, to feel. My guide seems to compose herself well, but she may not be the sweet flower she’s presenting here.
Lilly slides her cane around a bit before encouraging me to follow her again. Our goodbyes are easy to send in the relatively quiet halls. We continue where we left off, sidling ourselves along the closest wall and lightly alternating between slides and taps.
She talks to me as we go about our way, stating facts and statistics related to the Yamaku in general. It’s a fascinating place, as told by her information. But, actually being here and traversing the barren halls at this time of day, it seems less special, and simply more ‘safe’. I assume that to be intentional.
The halls are wide enough berth to accommodate wheelchairs, clean enough to not trip over anything, and padded at the very bottom to assist those of us who are sightless. We pass many doors with knobs, but equally as many with easier levers. It must be part of the renovations she’d mentioned, bringing accessibility to the forefront.
I haven’t even commented on the smell in the halls. There is none; no stray aromas lurking about aside from a window or two on the outer walls of the building as we pass them. it’s a bit unsettling, but I’m guessing there is some sort of filtration system of some sort, for the sake of those more sensitive to particles in the air. The open windows we pass are still heavily screened, I’m guessing. It creates an unnatural feeling, a lack of air flow to keep the nothingness from feeling stale.
She continues her lead. It’s much easier to sustain my chase here. Even momentary intersections are easy enough to cross without much trouble. So long as I can get a modest swing along the tiles of the floor, I can easily spot the incoming wall without colliding into it with my face - like I did back in kindergarten. Kindergarten was easy, though; we had nap-time.
I miss nap-time.
Then again, having a bunch of teens sleeping together in the same room, no matter how civil, is still begging for trouble. A room of blind students without proper supervision could be far more scandalous. As an young adult, I am confined to napping in my off-time. I just hope I get enough off-time here. I’m still not sure how heavy a regimen I’ll be expected to undertake outside of classes. That was another thing kindergarten didn’t have; homework.
I quietly rue getting older as we come to a stop. We’ve come full circle back to the entrance of the building we originally used. Content we’ve made it this far, Lilly asks for my opinion on where to go next, but not before commending me.
“My, my. You didn’t seem to have any troubles inside. That’s good. A lot of students get frustrated about maneuvering when they always need to take the long way.”
It’s true. Aside from the last leg of the trip, we traced the wall around a few turns before reaching the classroom, and took a separate wall to comfortably return to the portal we’re resting at now. We also crossed three wide gaps without walls to guide us for a short time. So long as I’m not distracted, I may do well at getting around indoors, at least for now. the time spent outside the protective walls are going to be a different story.
“Hmmm,” she says thoughtfully. It takes a few seconds before she adds to the statement. “Would you like to visit the library next? Or, maybe we should listen to what Ms. Tokoi told you and visit the nurse or Mrs. Nobatou?”
I cringe, almost audibly.
I ask her, “Do you need to follow me inside when we get there? Like,” I’m not sure how to phrase it. “Like, can you stay outside when I’m talking to them?”
She must be thinking. It’s taking far too many moments. She wants to ask about it. She’s debating whether it’s worth the trouble.
“Of course, I’ll wait outside. I’m not sure the nurse would allow my presence either way. He’s very professional. I can show you the path to the medical wing now, if you’d like.”
I agree to her offer, but I’m still uneasy.
“Naofumi...”
I hate when people begin by just stating my name like that. Thankfully, she doesn’t allow as much time to pass between grabbing my attention and fulfilling her purpose for demanding it in the first place.
“It’s not my place to get involved with private matters. There are many students here who are very secretive and personal about things. It’s their right, and I won’t ask anything of you that you yourself are unwilling to share. I’ll never intrude.”
Before I can provide a rebuttal, she clears ahead of me and taps her cane impatiently.
“Come now. We can make good time. You mustn’t keep someone waiting.”
Eager more to get it over with than to actually proceed, I oblige and we retreat to the cool and natural air of the court. In fact, it feels even cooler outside now, more humid even.
“Oh dear,” Lilly whispers.
Something tickles my cheek, causing me to twitch dramatically. It happens again, but I’m far less shocked and only sigh at this turn of events. Within moments, we’re both backing ourselves under the arch of the entrance, the sound of cold sprinkles becoming a steady sheen of sound. I can hear my guide doing something with her clothing. I bet she’s wearing her blazer, probably debating whether to throw it over her head or rush out unprotected. I know it’s her job to get me where I need to go for the next day or so, but she needn’t concern herself with getting sick on my account. We’re both going to sick, if anything.
I’m so stupid.
Smacking myself lightly on the scalp, I reach into my carry bag and sure enough, under the few books and effects I’d brought with me today, I find the exact thing we need. I ready it, press the toggle and slide the blade down past the handle, extending a small yet functional umbrella. She must have hear the click when it locked, since she’s already stepping my way. it’s not large enough for us to do anything outside of just walking or talking, but maybe that’s enough right now.
I offer her the chance to make a clean getaway, and she’s more than happy to comply. After awkwardly smacking our canes together and nearly tripping a few times, she suggests she lead the way and I resign myself to simply deal with umbrella duty. Holding our shield in one hand (quite elevated as well, since I’m also grasping my cane upright with that hand), and finding an agreeable grip on her blazer sleeve, we depart. It’s overtly complicated, but at least we’re moving. I smile at how absurd this must look, and not being to confirm it makes it all the sillier to me.
Try as it might, the rain will not win this round of play. I have backup.
Following my guide's lead, I take the first step into what may become familiar grounds over the next several years of my life. School buildings, I can handle. For some reason, I do very well indoors. I would think it was due to the proximity of walls, but sometimes I feel that I might prefer the thought of there being definite ends to every path inside.
Go too far; wall or door. Trace the wall until you find a door. Forget where you are? Everything tends to be marked accordingly in braille at every opportunity to veer off course. Even my old school, inadequate as it was, still followed universal guidelines like this. Even in the rush of changing classes (which I was permitted an opportune head start on the matter), I could at least hug the wall and avoid dealing with the traffic. No doubt did I gather attention, however. I know I did.
Maybe it will be easier to hide in the open now that I'm just one of the crowd.
"Are you ready, Fumi? I'm going to show you to our class first, then we can continue our tour of the campus."
I can hear the students in their respective rooms making only minor fusses. it's a much more collected atmosphere than I'm used to. Focused, even. either students here are very vigilant, or punishment for outbursts are exponentially more potent.
I need to remind myself not to cause any trouble while I'm here.
I tell her that I’m ready and we’ve already begun the walk. Our canes sync up a bit as we walk, unintentionally, but I notice it. I like rhythms, but consciously force myself to keep out of time for the sake of my own mobility. I don’t need to forget which sound is clearly mine. The collective tappings echo quite loudly in the halls. I’d think Lilly is aware of it, or maybe it’s not near as pronounced as I think it is. I have sensitive hearing, I think. It gives me a good ear for music and such, but inconvenient flak gets in my head too easily.
She insists I read every room title as we go on our way, probably to help me get oriented. this is going to be a routine I follow every day, so I should do my best to be able to trace my destination. Luckily, our class is relatively close on this floor and gives me a flush of relief knowing that I won’t have too much ground to cover each day. As I read the room aloud, Lilly gets the idea that I’m up to sped and lightly knocks on the door, interrupting whatever light chatter was going on before - save for one voice.
“Ah!. Naofumi, you’ve made it on time!” The sound of a notebook being flipped through - and quickly closed - permeates the lull. “Wait right there a moment.”
And so we wait in the doorway patiently as whoever this is busies with whatever duties they attend to. This doesn’t sound like the person who was at my other school. The teacher who visited me had a much more spirited voice. This sounds more like a student my own age or a little over. Do they have student teaching programs? That actually sounds kind of neat. Maybe if I can hammer down on my history or something, I should try to give that a go.
The sound of desks being rearranged distracts me. we’ll probably never do anything like that in our class. The room’s probably been exactly the same every year for the sake of students being able to get around. I do fine indoors, but busy rooms... areas with dozens of desks or workstations, with people all rolling over each other to get to their personal space. That take time to remember completely, and getting around would most likely be tenfold the complication with a whole room of people like me who need to feel their way around. My old school always had me in the very back. It was very easy to find every day, in every classroom, and they allowed me to use my cane at all times on the property.
Footsteps approach us form within, followed by the insistence that we back away a little. We comply, and the door is shut, preventing our conversation from being idly eavesdropped, though I highly doubt it’s anything important. it’s probably more out of courtesy for the students inside the room than those of us in the hall.
“Hello there. My name is Eiko Tokoi, and I’m filling in for the week.”
Well, that explains a lot. Her voice is so playful, like she was just finishing a game of cards on a positive trend. I greet her as well, making sure to bow on cue, mentally compensating for my informal greeting to miss Satou earlier. Lilly follows suit, making it obvious now that she’s never met this person either. Thinking back, wouldn’t Lilly have been in school today if it weren’t for me? Does she get special privileges for being on the Student Council?
“Our usual instructor’s been dealing with some family issues and hasn’t returned from Osaka yet. She said it would only be a few days, but it’s already looking like it’ll be a few more.”
The fact that she doesn’t recant her language tells me a lot about how comfortable she is here. Most people would have followed that up with an apology, but she barely takes a moment to think before she talks again.
“Um, it’s probably not the best time for her to get to know the room layout, since it’s in session and all, but tomorrow’s a half day and I was thinking we could just leave the room open a few hours afterward. You know, so she can wander around and figure it all out. I have a note - ” I hear a zipper opening with a quick *vvzziip*. I hope she has a purse or something, modesty in our presence or not. I’ll admit, it would be awful forward of her considering we’ve just met.
I catch a heavy whiff of makeup, a powdery dry scent with only a fragment of strawberry to it. Damn. Purse wins.
“Here we go, “ telling no one in particular. “It says here that you already have a desk assigned for you and that we’ve received your books already. It says something about you needing to check in with the nurse later and Lilly’s gonna hafta show you where Mrs. Nobatou’s office is. “ She twirls the paper around. “There’s a scribble on the back reminding me to tell you that your medication isn’t here yet and that you need to bring that up with the nurse when you see him.”
I didn’t want anyone else to hear any of that. I didn’t want Lilly to know that. I didn’t want this girl I’ve never met before knowing that. Maybe they don’t take it to heart like I am, but some sort of confidentiality is implied when it comes to medical issues. I know they’re not going to ask, but I know must be thinking about it, even as a mental aside.
What’s wrong with the new girl?
Is she sick?
Why is she meeting with the councilor?
Does she have... problems?
Who the hell gave them the right to even mention that?
“Umm, are you alright?”
I must have been making a face again. I keep my protestation silent once more and recompose myself. Not wanting to create a scene, I simply brush it off and let them know that “I’m fine.” It’s the most common lie in society, next to declarations of love and new years’ resolutions. One more on top of billions shouldn’t hurt anything. I’ve probably already drawn more attention to myself than necessary and made it even worse. Now they’re bound to be trying to figure me out, like it’s that easy. Like they could.
Lilly picks up for me and asks about making up what she’s missed so far. They’re only listening to a presentation right now, so it’s not a big deal to her if Lilly picks up a copy of the CD before the end of classes today. I have a feeling she’s not the kind of person to bring up uncomfortable topics. She seems too nice. well, she acts nice. People are free to act one way and think freely in another. It’s the sole freedom that takes the most effort to break; the ability to imagine, to feel. My guide seems to compose herself well, but she may not be the sweet flower she’s presenting here.
Lilly slides her cane around a bit before encouraging me to follow her again. Our goodbyes are easy to send in the relatively quiet halls. We continue where we left off, sidling ourselves along the closest wall and lightly alternating between slides and taps.
She talks to me as we go about our way, stating facts and statistics related to the Yamaku in general. It’s a fascinating place, as told by her information. But, actually being here and traversing the barren halls at this time of day, it seems less special, and simply more ‘safe’. I assume that to be intentional.
The halls are wide enough berth to accommodate wheelchairs, clean enough to not trip over anything, and padded at the very bottom to assist those of us who are sightless. We pass many doors with knobs, but equally as many with easier levers. It must be part of the renovations she’d mentioned, bringing accessibility to the forefront.
I haven’t even commented on the smell in the halls. There is none; no stray aromas lurking about aside from a window or two on the outer walls of the building as we pass them. it’s a bit unsettling, but I’m guessing there is some sort of filtration system of some sort, for the sake of those more sensitive to particles in the air. The open windows we pass are still heavily screened, I’m guessing. It creates an unnatural feeling, a lack of air flow to keep the nothingness from feeling stale.
She continues her lead. It’s much easier to sustain my chase here. Even momentary intersections are easy enough to cross without much trouble. So long as I can get a modest swing along the tiles of the floor, I can easily spot the incoming wall without colliding into it with my face - like I did back in kindergarten. Kindergarten was easy, though; we had nap-time.
I miss nap-time.
Then again, having a bunch of teens sleeping together in the same room, no matter how civil, is still begging for trouble. A room of blind students without proper supervision could be far more scandalous. As an young adult, I am confined to napping in my off-time. I just hope I get enough off-time here. I’m still not sure how heavy a regimen I’ll be expected to undertake outside of classes. That was another thing kindergarten didn’t have; homework.
I quietly rue getting older as we come to a stop. We’ve come full circle back to the entrance of the building we originally used. Content we’ve made it this far, Lilly asks for my opinion on where to go next, but not before commending me.
“My, my. You didn’t seem to have any troubles inside. That’s good. A lot of students get frustrated about maneuvering when they always need to take the long way.”
It’s true. Aside from the last leg of the trip, we traced the wall around a few turns before reaching the classroom, and took a separate wall to comfortably return to the portal we’re resting at now. We also crossed three wide gaps without walls to guide us for a short time. So long as I’m not distracted, I may do well at getting around indoors, at least for now. the time spent outside the protective walls are going to be a different story.
“Hmmm,” she says thoughtfully. It takes a few seconds before she adds to the statement. “Would you like to visit the library next? Or, maybe we should listen to what Ms. Tokoi told you and visit the nurse or Mrs. Nobatou?”
I cringe, almost audibly.
I ask her, “Do you need to follow me inside when we get there? Like,” I’m not sure how to phrase it. “Like, can you stay outside when I’m talking to them?”
She must be thinking. It’s taking far too many moments. She wants to ask about it. She’s debating whether it’s worth the trouble.
“Of course, I’ll wait outside. I’m not sure the nurse would allow my presence either way. He’s very professional. I can show you the path to the medical wing now, if you’d like.”
I agree to her offer, but I’m still uneasy.
“Naofumi...”
I hate when people begin by just stating my name like that. Thankfully, she doesn’t allow as much time to pass between grabbing my attention and fulfilling her purpose for demanding it in the first place.
“It’s not my place to get involved with private matters. There are many students here who are very secretive and personal about things. It’s their right, and I won’t ask anything of you that you yourself are unwilling to share. I’ll never intrude.”
Before I can provide a rebuttal, she clears ahead of me and taps her cane impatiently.
“Come now. We can make good time. You mustn’t keep someone waiting.”
Eager more to get it over with than to actually proceed, I oblige and we retreat to the cool and natural air of the court. In fact, it feels even cooler outside now, more humid even.
“Oh dear,” Lilly whispers.
Something tickles my cheek, causing me to twitch dramatically. It happens again, but I’m far less shocked and only sigh at this turn of events. Within moments, we’re both backing ourselves under the arch of the entrance, the sound of cold sprinkles becoming a steady sheen of sound. I can hear my guide doing something with her clothing. I bet she’s wearing her blazer, probably debating whether to throw it over her head or rush out unprotected. I know it’s her job to get me where I need to go for the next day or so, but she needn’t concern herself with getting sick on my account. We’re both going to sick, if anything.
I’m so stupid.
Smacking myself lightly on the scalp, I reach into my carry bag and sure enough, under the few books and effects I’d brought with me today, I find the exact thing we need. I ready it, press the toggle and slide the blade down past the handle, extending a small yet functional umbrella. She must have hear the click when it locked, since she’s already stepping my way. it’s not large enough for us to do anything outside of just walking or talking, but maybe that’s enough right now.
I offer her the chance to make a clean getaway, and she’s more than happy to comply. After awkwardly smacking our canes together and nearly tripping a few times, she suggests she lead the way and I resign myself to simply deal with umbrella duty. Holding our shield in one hand (quite elevated as well, since I’m also grasping my cane upright with that hand), and finding an agreeable grip on her blazer sleeve, we depart. It’s overtly complicated, but at least we’re moving. I smile at how absurd this must look, and not being to confirm it makes it all the sillier to me.
Try as it might, the rain will not win this round of play. I have backup.
Re: The Blind Leading The Blind
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
that's me, by the way.
i wondered why it asked me a question before i could post it. i wasn't even logged in, apparently. that kinda sucks too, since i was going to upgrade the nurse to Capital Letter status, since i forgot to do so before posting.
also have one or two letters that needed caps as well, now that i look over it.
oh well. hopefully my inner perfectionist can sleep sound tonight.
that's me, by the way.
i wondered why it asked me a question before i could post it. i wasn't even logged in, apparently. that kinda sucks too, since i was going to upgrade the nurse to Capital Letter status, since i forgot to do so before posting.
also have one or two letters that needed caps as well, now that i look over it.
oh well. hopefully my inner perfectionist can sleep sound tonight.
Re: The Blind Leading The Blind
Wow this updates fast. not that it's a bad thing. It's great, in fact 
Re: The Blind Leading The Blind
CONTINUED -
Perhaps my initial claim that the rain would not best us was premature. At first we were happy enough fumbling down the walk with little resistance. Mere minutes into our trek, we're starting to find our footing a less sure as water covers the paved blocks in a very inconvenient fashion. Lilly insists we're nearby, but I'm not sure how she could tell. I can't judge the distance we've traveled at this pace, and there aren't any indications of progress except that the ground here must be lower than our starting point, as I can feel a wetness breaching into my vinyl shoes via the breather holes by my ankles.
My carry bag knocks into her every so often. I should have switched arms.
"Oh," she exclaims. "Did you bring books with you?"
Seeing no harm in a safe topic like this, I tell her of the three books in my possession. She confesses that she was "relieved" when she discovered I could understand tactile words at all. She's glad to find that I'm so capable.
"There are still many people who never learn, and all it does is cut them off even further from the world around them."
I'm almost shocked she would say this. Not by the statement per se, but the fact that she may be correct.
"Why wouldn't someone want to be able to do this. I mean, I can understand that it's difficult to learn a completely new style of communication if you lose your sight recently or are going to lose it down the road..." I can feel myself getting more than a little indignant, "...but if you've been like this your entire life, why refuse an opportunity to at least keep your mind occupied?"
So many times I would just sit and listen, or lie down and just think. I didn't have a personal music player until much later in life, so any chance to keep myself busy was encouraged. if i didn't, I would get lost in my head.
"I like imaginary stories," I continue. "I like facts just as much. Reading kept me going when I wasn't sure I could do anything..."
Sensing my drooping demeanor, Lilly perks up and asks what kind of things I'd been reading today.
"There's Meteorological Anomolies, which is more of a college textbook in braille form, even if it is crazy short due to size limits. I also have a Japanese grammar text, and a collection of short stories. I'm trying to get a hold of some translations for a much longer book, but it's in English and I can't find anyone willing to attempt that kind of thing."
She gives a questionable "Hmmm".
"Well, I can speak and read English." That surprises me, then again... 'Would you like me to read it to you sometime? How long is it?"
I laugh.
"Two-hundred and twenty nine pages across three parts."
Her pace drops considerably, and I think she nearly dropped her cane if it weren't strapped around her wrist. I can't stop a short giggle from escaping. I try to press onward, encouraging us to continue walking. "It's cool. I'm not holding my breath. It can wait until I have enough cash to order it transcripted some time if it ever gets a translation. There was a company that did things like that. I just gotta check into it"
There are a few screams from far ahead of us. There wasn't a hint of terror in them, just playful noise. Everyone's been caught unprepared, though I suspect I'm not the only one who listened to the radio this morning for the forecast. They didn't call for precipitation, but they also didn't admit it was impossible. I've come to be pessimistic, and prepared as such. I should have worn more defensive footwear, however.
My poor socks might not make it the day after all. That's a shame too, since I'd only brought three pairs with me in my luggage. This will teach me to pass up on shopping for essentials yesterday with my stepmother. She insisted, but I was too busy fitting as much sleep as my body could handle into my last few days of freedom before the responsibilities of school beckoned my time again. Besides, she would have been the one to drive us there, to pick them out, to pay for them...
This is pathetic, that we can't even do something so simple by ourselves. I'm constantly being held back by practical limitations, and it's driving me mad. For the first time since I sprained my ankle as a child, I tripped on my stairs at my home today. I was furious. I swore like a sailor, even though I was relatively unharmed - and it wasn't by anything more than I couldn't tell quite where the drop began. Even holding onto the railing, I still managed to lose my footing.
It's something so god damn rudimentary made all the more difficult that those stairs weren't built for me.
There's a sloshing behind us, almost like a car testing its breaks on wet terrain. The sound doesn't stop, however, and its sliding sound becomes more foot-like as it approaches us. it's either a person, or a formula one wheelchair of some sort.
"Lilly!"
My arm is pulled a bit when she shifts her weight. We both stop instinctively, which is good since one of us would have faceplanted otherwise. 'One of us' being me. It's a young man, from the sound of it. Is this a friend of hers? She seems
easy enough to get along with, so it's easy to assume she'd have many friends.
I... didn't have many friends where I come from.
"is that Mako?"
He laughs. It's an excited laugh, but seems unnecessary given the situation. he must have an umbrella too, for the pitter patter of rain is diminished in his direction. In fact, there's a wider range of silence from that way as well. His is bigger, maybe even beach size. Why would anyone need something so excessive at a school?
"Yea, it's me. I was on my way to the art room for a meeting, but saw you two trying to fit under that umbrella there."
Lilly briefly explains the situation and they catch up with school business and whatnot. She must be very important,a s he's making a lot of discussion about budget constraints and such. Maybe he's on the Student Council as well, or a helper of some kind. She introduces me suddenly, without my consent, but I can't stop her and pass a belated greeting to the boy, who seems to pick up on why we're having so much trouble.
"Oooh, I get it. If you go too fast, she might not be able to keep up here in the rain like this."
Sure, let's just throw my inadequacies right out into the open, shall we?
I wanted to say it, but even I possess a content filter.
He's padding a keypad of some sort, the muted clicks a ghost on the wind. "Listen, I have an umbrella and a few minutes to spare if you guys need to get anywhere in particular. It could free up some room, I bet." There's a *clack* as something shuts, so it must have been a cell phone. I didn't think those were allowed on campus. Or, maybe it was game consoles. The line's a bit muddled these days, and I may still be completely off.
Consciously returning myself to the point, I'm unwilling to make this decision. I don't know this person. He may sound nice, but it might be because he's friends with her and not me. It could also be that he's using this as an excuse to get closer to Lilly or something. She tugs on my arm a little, getting my attention, although with the side effect of pulling my collar a tad lower.
"Naofumi?"
Again, starting with only my name. I make a noise indicating my awareness, but don't say anything else. Taking the moment, I also readjust my neckline a bit better. How much longer is this going to take if we split up? Is she going to pair up with him, or am I stuck following this guy around for the next ten minutes? She turns to me, and tries again, this time in a much softer voice, just barely above the percussive waves around us. She leans in just close enough that I can pick up the vanilla scent another time.
She must drink tea.
Or perhaps bathe in it.
It could very well be a shampoo.
"I was thinking we accept - but just until we reach the medical wing." She wiggles herself a bit, switching the balance of her legs. "If you don't want to, then," She seems resigned at this point. "...you could use your umbrella and simply follow me while I make a break for it in the rain."
Okay; that last part was guilt trip, through and through. She even went all sad and everything at the end of it. The ruse is transparent though, and easily distinguished. before being stopped, we were practically at a crawl huddled together like this. I know we've been standing here a while, and I really don't want anyone getting sick of my accord, so...
"All right," I offer. I don't like this, depending on another person I've only just met in order to do something as minimal as walking on a sidewalk without perishing.
Lilly may still be the better part of a stranger to me, but she's the closest thing I have to an acquaintance here so far outside of the hired staff. To already start spreading my trust around so freely is daunting, even if this is a wholly innocent event. I'm hesitant, but willingly loosen my grip on her sleeve. The raindrops quiet themselves over my head, and sure that he's got all of us under his cover, I lower my own and retract it. Deciding I'll shake it out later, I run its starp over my wrist and ready my cane ina more comfortable arc. Holding my arm straight up was a bad idea, and I'm already feeling sore from the ordeal.
"Ladies, if you would be so kind."
His faux-gentlemanly efforts may be wasted on me, but it seems Lilly opts quickly. Maybe it's all for show after all. I reach beside me and manage a decent grip of his arm. He's thinner than I expected, with very little definition. It would be best if I didn't comment, which I find easy enough to do. Readying myself when he begins a slow trot, I attempt to match it and we're off.
They talk a lot. I'd almost say they talk too much. I'm not picking up on any romantic interests, though. They seem more like colleagues than anything else. The trip isn't even that long, with Mako already saying that he can see it ahead. That was a very long setup for such a short journey, and the rain itself has practically shrugged itself away by now. I seem to have inadvertently witnessed a business meeting, with the sky conspiring to make it happen.
There are no ominous steps leading into the medical center, so our arrival is a surprise to me, but not Lilly. No; she has a perception I've yet to equal. She announces our goal and thanks the boy for his help, being sure to add a short lecture on overstretching monetary means. She really can lay it down when she wants, even on this young man who just aided in our ability to even get here. She'd make a good lawyer.
He apologizes, but happily reassures her that he knows what he's doing. She returns the optimism. So easy to forgive and move on. I don't thank him, my window being too short for me to realize he's already exited the scene until it's too late. I feel like I should say something, but nothing's happening. I don't want to go inside.
I remember my umbrella is still in rough shape and do my best to shake it at least somewhat dry. I don't expect a miracle, but it would be nice if I could store it somewhere without drenching all of my possessions or dangling from my arm. Some of the spackles catch my face. I stopped wearing sunglasses years ago, but I regret that life choice just now when some of it gets into my eyes.
Unlike many blind people, I can 'look' around if I want. My eyes may not focus on anything in particular, but at least they don't cross like I've heard others speak of. It almost helps me feel normal, like this. Plus, I've received compliments to the effect that my eyes are pleasant to look into. It's a small comment, but it's something that I like to believe might be true, even if it's just a white lie to make me happy. I wipe what I can with the only completely dry part of my shirt and find the wall by accident. I search it with my hands, but I can't find any separations or unique markings.
"Is there a placard here too, Lilly?" I ask.
"Not here," she replies. "But there is a sign on the outer wall. Just not by the entrance."
I give up my search and wipe my hands on my slacks at the off-chance that the paneling is more unkempt than I thought it would be. She opens the door and ushers me inside, being sure to take my umbrella from me.
"I'm just setting it on the rack over here."
She's still holding my hand, and tugs me ever so slightly, leading me to her position. By her motions, I find the handle of my umbrella, jutted off center and identifiable from it's grip compared to the three others around it. My stepmother carved a special groove into it so it would be noticeable for me. Still, mine's the only one that seems to have been in use lately, but that may change after my visit here.
Oh yeah.
I'd forgotten why we'd risked life and limb to reach the medical wing. Being here now only reminds me what I was avoiding. I don't want to talk to the Nurse. I don't want to talk to the counselor. I barely want to talk to Lilly, and she's been guiding me since I arrived today.
I'm also aware that I need to talk to the Nurse. I need to talk to the counselor. one can't happen without the other and both are imperative for me to be permitted to attend here. Failure to do either would result in my dismissal, and I have no intention of returning home a failure. Well, worse of a failure.
I ask her to lead me to the Nurse's office, and she does so without hesitation. Sidling the wall doesn't take near as much time as the hallways of the much larger building across the yard. We've stopped so quickly, I nearly collide with her. I read the tile posted by the door to ascertain for myself.
"Here we are, then. This is his office. There are a few beds in there in case you ever have any trouble, or you feel like you can't make it to your room."
We still haven't been to the dorms yet. I hope all of my things are unloaded already. I'd hate to go through all of this only to be faced with unpacking luggage once I get there.
"Thank you, Lilly," I say, actually meaning it. This may be duty, but she's been a real sport about it. She surprises me by asking a favor.
"If you don't mind, Naofumi... Would it be alright if I borrowed the weather book?"
"The meteorology book? Sure." I dig it out of my carry bag and hold it out, trying to aim it to her. She locates it quickly and once I'm sure she has a satisfactory grip on it, I lax my own and close the flap on the bag. I then sling it back over my shoulder where it should have been for a majority of the long haul.
I turn to the door again and find the handle, but stop myself. I then knock lightly on the door itself. It's a sturdy wooden sound, almost artificial in tone - possibly lined with metal. I hear a shuffling of papers from inside, followed by a very enthusiastic invitation. Lilly places her hand on my shoulder and assures me she'll be waiting just outside. As she wishes me well and taps along the wall, I gently press the handle and push the door ajar. Being sure to keep my mobility cane out of harm's way, I then confine myself to the office with a *click* as the springs in the handle rest in their original position. Just as I release my fingers from the door, it seems my hosts has realized who I am and calls my name.
"Naofumi Kurei, is it?"
I nod, not wanting to risk speaking without it being triple-checked by that filter I mentioned. He must be the Nurse. This is most certainly a medical office. It has all the starchy, powdery latex smells I can think of at the same time.
"I'll come to you. Just hang tight."
He sounds so assuring, energetic. Given the nature of his position, that would make sense. There's an almost indistinct lisp to his speech that makes it a tad endearing alongside his very natural dialect. Whatever he was shuffling, he's done now, and walks toward me, his heavy shoes clapping all the while on the tiled floor.
He reaches my spot by the door and assists me to a very uncomfortable seat with no backing, reminiscent of many past visits to doctors. It's all a bit nostalgic, but with unpleasant memories instead of joyful ones. This isn't like a summer rain feeling from when you're a child being carried with you until adulthood. No, this is more akin to simply being uncomfortable then, and uncomfortable now with little advancement outside of age.
I lean my cane against my chair's edge and agree to a quick checkup.
"All right, now take off your shirt."
I chortle loudly, caught out my element for a brief second. He is joking, right? My progressively confused visage is met by his own laughter.
"Haha! Sorry." His playful tone becomes very disappointed. "I'd hoped to clear the air a little with that one, but it seems to have backfired. All points considered, you can keep the shirt on." I can practically feel his smile. "It'll be fine just the same, but if you're worried, I could get a female to help with this. I'm sure they wouldn't mind. I don't want you to be uncomfortable, though. I am a professional."
So I've heard.
I comply to trust the man and he gets down to business without wasting a moment. He gives the impression that he's used to dealing with the blind. He's practically narrating everything he does and places a hand lightly on my upper arm anytime he needs to touch/move a part of me. He does a blood pressure test on each arm and tests my grip. Next is breathing, which the only warning I get is a reiteration that he's 'a professional'.
I flinch.
Stethoscopes are cold.
"Breathe in..."
I do so.
"...And out."
I do that as well, and after another two rounds of it, he exclaims that I'm doing all right considering my medication. Apparently, that is a topic he'd like to talk about.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
wow, the paragraphs look tiny when they're spread across like that
i need to relax my wording. some of it comes off as very "English Book"y, but that's also kinda how i talk most of the time
also, describing everything without visual tools = tricky
i dug this hole when i chose the perspective and i'll be buried in it ass-up
used the opportunity to replace words and add words and do things to words while no one was looking because i'm secretive like that
Perhaps my initial claim that the rain would not best us was premature. At first we were happy enough fumbling down the walk with little resistance. Mere minutes into our trek, we're starting to find our footing a less sure as water covers the paved blocks in a very inconvenient fashion. Lilly insists we're nearby, but I'm not sure how she could tell. I can't judge the distance we've traveled at this pace, and there aren't any indications of progress except that the ground here must be lower than our starting point, as I can feel a wetness breaching into my vinyl shoes via the breather holes by my ankles.
My carry bag knocks into her every so often. I should have switched arms.
"Oh," she exclaims. "Did you bring books with you?"
Seeing no harm in a safe topic like this, I tell her of the three books in my possession. She confesses that she was "relieved" when she discovered I could understand tactile words at all. She's glad to find that I'm so capable.
"There are still many people who never learn, and all it does is cut them off even further from the world around them."
I'm almost shocked she would say this. Not by the statement per se, but the fact that she may be correct.
"Why wouldn't someone want to be able to do this. I mean, I can understand that it's difficult to learn a completely new style of communication if you lose your sight recently or are going to lose it down the road..." I can feel myself getting more than a little indignant, "...but if you've been like this your entire life, why refuse an opportunity to at least keep your mind occupied?"
So many times I would just sit and listen, or lie down and just think. I didn't have a personal music player until much later in life, so any chance to keep myself busy was encouraged. if i didn't, I would get lost in my head.
"I like imaginary stories," I continue. "I like facts just as much. Reading kept me going when I wasn't sure I could do anything..."
Sensing my drooping demeanor, Lilly perks up and asks what kind of things I'd been reading today.
"There's Meteorological Anomolies, which is more of a college textbook in braille form, even if it is crazy short due to size limits. I also have a Japanese grammar text, and a collection of short stories. I'm trying to get a hold of some translations for a much longer book, but it's in English and I can't find anyone willing to attempt that kind of thing."
She gives a questionable "Hmmm".
"Well, I can speak and read English." That surprises me, then again... 'Would you like me to read it to you sometime? How long is it?"
I laugh.
"Two-hundred and twenty nine pages across three parts."
Her pace drops considerably, and I think she nearly dropped her cane if it weren't strapped around her wrist. I can't stop a short giggle from escaping. I try to press onward, encouraging us to continue walking. "It's cool. I'm not holding my breath. It can wait until I have enough cash to order it transcripted some time if it ever gets a translation. There was a company that did things like that. I just gotta check into it"
There are a few screams from far ahead of us. There wasn't a hint of terror in them, just playful noise. Everyone's been caught unprepared, though I suspect I'm not the only one who listened to the radio this morning for the forecast. They didn't call for precipitation, but they also didn't admit it was impossible. I've come to be pessimistic, and prepared as such. I should have worn more defensive footwear, however.
My poor socks might not make it the day after all. That's a shame too, since I'd only brought three pairs with me in my luggage. This will teach me to pass up on shopping for essentials yesterday with my stepmother. She insisted, but I was too busy fitting as much sleep as my body could handle into my last few days of freedom before the responsibilities of school beckoned my time again. Besides, she would have been the one to drive us there, to pick them out, to pay for them...
This is pathetic, that we can't even do something so simple by ourselves. I'm constantly being held back by practical limitations, and it's driving me mad. For the first time since I sprained my ankle as a child, I tripped on my stairs at my home today. I was furious. I swore like a sailor, even though I was relatively unharmed - and it wasn't by anything more than I couldn't tell quite where the drop began. Even holding onto the railing, I still managed to lose my footing.
It's something so god damn rudimentary made all the more difficult that those stairs weren't built for me.
There's a sloshing behind us, almost like a car testing its breaks on wet terrain. The sound doesn't stop, however, and its sliding sound becomes more foot-like as it approaches us. it's either a person, or a formula one wheelchair of some sort.
"Lilly!"
My arm is pulled a bit when she shifts her weight. We both stop instinctively, which is good since one of us would have faceplanted otherwise. 'One of us' being me. It's a young man, from the sound of it. Is this a friend of hers? She seems
easy enough to get along with, so it's easy to assume she'd have many friends.
I... didn't have many friends where I come from.
"is that Mako?"
He laughs. It's an excited laugh, but seems unnecessary given the situation. he must have an umbrella too, for the pitter patter of rain is diminished in his direction. In fact, there's a wider range of silence from that way as well. His is bigger, maybe even beach size. Why would anyone need something so excessive at a school?
"Yea, it's me. I was on my way to the art room for a meeting, but saw you two trying to fit under that umbrella there."
Lilly briefly explains the situation and they catch up with school business and whatnot. She must be very important,a s he's making a lot of discussion about budget constraints and such. Maybe he's on the Student Council as well, or a helper of some kind. She introduces me suddenly, without my consent, but I can't stop her and pass a belated greeting to the boy, who seems to pick up on why we're having so much trouble.
"Oooh, I get it. If you go too fast, she might not be able to keep up here in the rain like this."
Sure, let's just throw my inadequacies right out into the open, shall we?
I wanted to say it, but even I possess a content filter.
He's padding a keypad of some sort, the muted clicks a ghost on the wind. "Listen, I have an umbrella and a few minutes to spare if you guys need to get anywhere in particular. It could free up some room, I bet." There's a *clack* as something shuts, so it must have been a cell phone. I didn't think those were allowed on campus. Or, maybe it was game consoles. The line's a bit muddled these days, and I may still be completely off.
Consciously returning myself to the point, I'm unwilling to make this decision. I don't know this person. He may sound nice, but it might be because he's friends with her and not me. It could also be that he's using this as an excuse to get closer to Lilly or something. She tugs on my arm a little, getting my attention, although with the side effect of pulling my collar a tad lower.
"Naofumi?"
Again, starting with only my name. I make a noise indicating my awareness, but don't say anything else. Taking the moment, I also readjust my neckline a bit better. How much longer is this going to take if we split up? Is she going to pair up with him, or am I stuck following this guy around for the next ten minutes? She turns to me, and tries again, this time in a much softer voice, just barely above the percussive waves around us. She leans in just close enough that I can pick up the vanilla scent another time.
She must drink tea.
Or perhaps bathe in it.
It could very well be a shampoo.
"I was thinking we accept - but just until we reach the medical wing." She wiggles herself a bit, switching the balance of her legs. "If you don't want to, then," She seems resigned at this point. "...you could use your umbrella and simply follow me while I make a break for it in the rain."
Okay; that last part was guilt trip, through and through. She even went all sad and everything at the end of it. The ruse is transparent though, and easily distinguished. before being stopped, we were practically at a crawl huddled together like this. I know we've been standing here a while, and I really don't want anyone getting sick of my accord, so...
"All right," I offer. I don't like this, depending on another person I've only just met in order to do something as minimal as walking on a sidewalk without perishing.
Lilly may still be the better part of a stranger to me, but she's the closest thing I have to an acquaintance here so far outside of the hired staff. To already start spreading my trust around so freely is daunting, even if this is a wholly innocent event. I'm hesitant, but willingly loosen my grip on her sleeve. The raindrops quiet themselves over my head, and sure that he's got all of us under his cover, I lower my own and retract it. Deciding I'll shake it out later, I run its starp over my wrist and ready my cane ina more comfortable arc. Holding my arm straight up was a bad idea, and I'm already feeling sore from the ordeal.
"Ladies, if you would be so kind."
His faux-gentlemanly efforts may be wasted on me, but it seems Lilly opts quickly. Maybe it's all for show after all. I reach beside me and manage a decent grip of his arm. He's thinner than I expected, with very little definition. It would be best if I didn't comment, which I find easy enough to do. Readying myself when he begins a slow trot, I attempt to match it and we're off.
They talk a lot. I'd almost say they talk too much. I'm not picking up on any romantic interests, though. They seem more like colleagues than anything else. The trip isn't even that long, with Mako already saying that he can see it ahead. That was a very long setup for such a short journey, and the rain itself has practically shrugged itself away by now. I seem to have inadvertently witnessed a business meeting, with the sky conspiring to make it happen.
There are no ominous steps leading into the medical center, so our arrival is a surprise to me, but not Lilly. No; she has a perception I've yet to equal. She announces our goal and thanks the boy for his help, being sure to add a short lecture on overstretching monetary means. She really can lay it down when she wants, even on this young man who just aided in our ability to even get here. She'd make a good lawyer.
He apologizes, but happily reassures her that he knows what he's doing. She returns the optimism. So easy to forgive and move on. I don't thank him, my window being too short for me to realize he's already exited the scene until it's too late. I feel like I should say something, but nothing's happening. I don't want to go inside.
I remember my umbrella is still in rough shape and do my best to shake it at least somewhat dry. I don't expect a miracle, but it would be nice if I could store it somewhere without drenching all of my possessions or dangling from my arm. Some of the spackles catch my face. I stopped wearing sunglasses years ago, but I regret that life choice just now when some of it gets into my eyes.
Unlike many blind people, I can 'look' around if I want. My eyes may not focus on anything in particular, but at least they don't cross like I've heard others speak of. It almost helps me feel normal, like this. Plus, I've received compliments to the effect that my eyes are pleasant to look into. It's a small comment, but it's something that I like to believe might be true, even if it's just a white lie to make me happy. I wipe what I can with the only completely dry part of my shirt and find the wall by accident. I search it with my hands, but I can't find any separations or unique markings.
"Is there a placard here too, Lilly?" I ask.
"Not here," she replies. "But there is a sign on the outer wall. Just not by the entrance."
I give up my search and wipe my hands on my slacks at the off-chance that the paneling is more unkempt than I thought it would be. She opens the door and ushers me inside, being sure to take my umbrella from me.
"I'm just setting it on the rack over here."
She's still holding my hand, and tugs me ever so slightly, leading me to her position. By her motions, I find the handle of my umbrella, jutted off center and identifiable from it's grip compared to the three others around it. My stepmother carved a special groove into it so it would be noticeable for me. Still, mine's the only one that seems to have been in use lately, but that may change after my visit here.
Oh yeah.
I'd forgotten why we'd risked life and limb to reach the medical wing. Being here now only reminds me what I was avoiding. I don't want to talk to the Nurse. I don't want to talk to the counselor. I barely want to talk to Lilly, and she's been guiding me since I arrived today.
I'm also aware that I need to talk to the Nurse. I need to talk to the counselor. one can't happen without the other and both are imperative for me to be permitted to attend here. Failure to do either would result in my dismissal, and I have no intention of returning home a failure. Well, worse of a failure.
I ask her to lead me to the Nurse's office, and she does so without hesitation. Sidling the wall doesn't take near as much time as the hallways of the much larger building across the yard. We've stopped so quickly, I nearly collide with her. I read the tile posted by the door to ascertain for myself.
"Here we are, then. This is his office. There are a few beds in there in case you ever have any trouble, or you feel like you can't make it to your room."
We still haven't been to the dorms yet. I hope all of my things are unloaded already. I'd hate to go through all of this only to be faced with unpacking luggage once I get there.
"Thank you, Lilly," I say, actually meaning it. This may be duty, but she's been a real sport about it. She surprises me by asking a favor.
"If you don't mind, Naofumi... Would it be alright if I borrowed the weather book?"
"The meteorology book? Sure." I dig it out of my carry bag and hold it out, trying to aim it to her. She locates it quickly and once I'm sure she has a satisfactory grip on it, I lax my own and close the flap on the bag. I then sling it back over my shoulder where it should have been for a majority of the long haul.
I turn to the door again and find the handle, but stop myself. I then knock lightly on the door itself. It's a sturdy wooden sound, almost artificial in tone - possibly lined with metal. I hear a shuffling of papers from inside, followed by a very enthusiastic invitation. Lilly places her hand on my shoulder and assures me she'll be waiting just outside. As she wishes me well and taps along the wall, I gently press the handle and push the door ajar. Being sure to keep my mobility cane out of harm's way, I then confine myself to the office with a *click* as the springs in the handle rest in their original position. Just as I release my fingers from the door, it seems my hosts has realized who I am and calls my name.
"Naofumi Kurei, is it?"
I nod, not wanting to risk speaking without it being triple-checked by that filter I mentioned. He must be the Nurse. This is most certainly a medical office. It has all the starchy, powdery latex smells I can think of at the same time.
"I'll come to you. Just hang tight."
He sounds so assuring, energetic. Given the nature of his position, that would make sense. There's an almost indistinct lisp to his speech that makes it a tad endearing alongside his very natural dialect. Whatever he was shuffling, he's done now, and walks toward me, his heavy shoes clapping all the while on the tiled floor.
He reaches my spot by the door and assists me to a very uncomfortable seat with no backing, reminiscent of many past visits to doctors. It's all a bit nostalgic, but with unpleasant memories instead of joyful ones. This isn't like a summer rain feeling from when you're a child being carried with you until adulthood. No, this is more akin to simply being uncomfortable then, and uncomfortable now with little advancement outside of age.
I lean my cane against my chair's edge and agree to a quick checkup.
"All right, now take off your shirt."
I chortle loudly, caught out my element for a brief second. He is joking, right? My progressively confused visage is met by his own laughter.
"Haha! Sorry." His playful tone becomes very disappointed. "I'd hoped to clear the air a little with that one, but it seems to have backfired. All points considered, you can keep the shirt on." I can practically feel his smile. "It'll be fine just the same, but if you're worried, I could get a female to help with this. I'm sure they wouldn't mind. I don't want you to be uncomfortable, though. I am a professional."
So I've heard.
I comply to trust the man and he gets down to business without wasting a moment. He gives the impression that he's used to dealing with the blind. He's practically narrating everything he does and places a hand lightly on my upper arm anytime he needs to touch/move a part of me. He does a blood pressure test on each arm and tests my grip. Next is breathing, which the only warning I get is a reiteration that he's 'a professional'.
I flinch.
Stethoscopes are cold.
"Breathe in..."
I do so.
"...And out."
I do that as well, and after another two rounds of it, he exclaims that I'm doing all right considering my medication. Apparently, that is a topic he'd like to talk about.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
wow, the paragraphs look tiny when they're spread across like that
i need to relax my wording. some of it comes off as very "English Book"y, but that's also kinda how i talk most of the time
also, describing everything without visual tools = tricky
i dug this hole when i chose the perspective and i'll be buried in it ass-up
used the opportunity to replace words and add words and do things to words while no one was looking because i'm secretive like that
Last edited by darkmelee on Sun Jan 15, 2012 6:07 pm, edited 4 times in total.
-
Mirage_GSM
- Posts: 6212
- Joined: Mon Jun 28, 2010 2:24 am
- Location: Germany
Re: The Blind Leading The Blind
A past thense slipped by you here:
I don't suppose it's important enough for you to change the whole chapter, though.
Also, there is a way to get from the main building to the Auxiliary building, where nurse has his office without going through the courtyard. It's mentioned in act 1.She was relieved I could understand tactile words at all and was glad to find that I'm so capable.
I don't suppose it's important enough for you to change the whole chapter, though.
Emi > Misha > Hanako > Lilly > Rin > Shizune
My collected KS-Fan Fictions: Mirage's Myths
My collected KS-Fan Fictions: Mirage's Myths
Sore wa himitsu desu.griffon8 wrote:Kosher, just because sex is your answer to everything doesn't mean that sex is the answer to everything.
Re: The Blind Leading The Blind
Mirage_GSM wrote:A past tense (fixed it for ya) slipped by you here:She was relieved I could understand tactile words at all and was glad to find that I'm so capable.Mirage_GSM wrote:Also, there is a way to get from the main building to the Auxiliary building, where nurse has his office without going through the courtyard. It's mentioned in act 1.
it's surprisingly easy to mend with keeping context/tense in check <see above>
you're jumping ahead~
Re: The Blind Leading The Blind
Chortling generally means to gleefully laugh or chuckle. When she chortles here, is she actually meant to be laughing, because judging by the Nurses reaction and her confused face, it seems like she was would be taken back or slightly shocked rather than laugh.darkmelee wrote: "All right, now take off your shirt."
I chortle loudly and make a face of confusion, met by his own laughter.
"Haha! Sorry." His playful tone becomes very disappointed. "I'd hoped to clear the air a little with that one, but it seems to have backfired. All points considered, you can keep the shirt on."
Just thought I'd mention it, still enjoying the story though
