Katawa Shoujo Forums

darrin wrote:--and I said there is no WAY in HELL I am going anywhere when the guy I love is in there DYING and... ah.. ah ha
ha..."

Aww :3

I thought that was great, I'd love to see more. Misha isn't written about enough, IMO!

darrin wrote:Yeah, I was kinda waffling internally a lot of the time between hoping "but she's under a lot of stress, it's an unusual situation!", and worrying "yeah, but is it too much?" More simply, I guess I was hoping the comedy would win in its battle with the cheesiness; maybe it didn't, but that's what I was hoping for anyway.

Heheh, I was trying to rationalize it the exact same way. (: I'm mostly torn about her narration of Hisao's writing I think. The pacing of her responses changes around there. It was perfect in the beginning, and it gets back on track around here:

Hey hey, not bad, not bad Hicchan! I will have to make you an honorary lefty, you can borrow my scissors if you want! Wahaha!"

(Which is incidentally one of my favorite lines.)
If I get really picky, I think she gets agitated some places when it might be more likely for her to be flustered; "stuff like 'His arimi...' dang it, I wrote it down somewhere, yeah here it is" might read better with "umm," in place of dang it. But, that's just related to how I perceive her. In any case, I was also very pleased with the way you included her difficulty with complex words And her little outburst towards Hisao was very good too, exactly the kind of thing that feels in character.

To be honest, I was worried more about getting that response for some of the other girls (Rin, for example)...

It did sound like Rin and Shizune were overreacting a little. In Shizune's case, only the swearing seemed excessive. I could believe a "damn" or two, but I think she'd limit that kind of thing and act more calmly under stress than most of the girls. I could see her visiting everyone he knew - both to update and even investigate any causes. Rin only felt out of character in that her metaphor (or whatever device she uses) was very recursive, when she usually just says things plainly, if in an off-beat way. So I've gotta correct myself, Misha sounds fine narrating those, Hisao/those two were a wee off. It was basically a complete victory for everything Misha. :3

Halkure wrote:It did sound like Rin and Shizune were overreacting a little. In Shizune's case, only the swearing seemed excessive. I could believe a "damn" or two, but I think she'd limit that kind of thing and act more calmly under stress than most of the girls. I could see her visiting everyone he knew - both to update and even investigate any causes. Rin only felt out of character in that her metaphor (or whatever device she uses) was very recursive, when she usually just says things plainly, if in an off-beat way. So I've gotta correct myself, Misha sounds fine narrating those, Hisao/those two were a wee off. It was basically a complete victory for everything Misha. :3

Well, actually, we haven't seen yet how either would respond to something like this, so who knows how spot-on darrin was here

I see someone else found out how easy it is to get on Kenji's path, by trying to pick the IC answer when talking to Lilly...
Anyway good writing. Spot on for Misha, a bit less so for Rin.
I'd love to find this in the game as an easter egg

Good stuff. I liked it.

Tue Jul 06, 2010 4:59 pm

Sat Jan 08, 2011 5:08 am

This my friend is called necro-bumping, and is considered rude/Bad/Impolite M'Kay?

having said that, yes it is good, and yes I would like to see more

GREAT STORY BRO!!! lol but not kidding I liked it. The "bad" end Kenji route was a bit depressing for me so seeing someone put at least a (maybe not quite positive but at least a not dead spin on it) is nice. I would be interested to see where this narrative would go from here great work.

That was a great story, would have been interesting if that was how you got to Misha's path.
Also a great opening to a great Misha x Hisao fiction.

Since this has already been necro'd... It's a very interesting idea. My urge to write a follow up to this is rising...