Page 3 of 5

Re: A day in the life of ____________

Posted: Mon Apr 26, 2010 11:22 am
by Smoku
neumanproductions wrote:School Days
DON'T GO ON THE BOAT, HISAO!!

Re: A day in the life of ____________

Posted: Mon Apr 26, 2010 11:30 am
by Guest
I think you should do one on Misha next.
kosherbacon wrote:Emi, just keep telling yourself that anything more than a handful is a waste. :P

Anyways, I'm glad to see how well you tackled Emi. I identify with her the least, so there's no way I couldn't done what you did. Also, your lines from Rin make me REALLY look forward to her turn.
Wait a minute, you're a girl? :shock:

Re: A day in the life of ____________

Posted: Mon Apr 26, 2010 11:30 am
by Silentcook
Smoku wrote:DON'T GO ON THE BOAT, HISAO!!
Don't worry, that got removed in the end. :twisted:
Also, I am kinda amused at how the above user dropped to Guest this time around. :mrgreen:

Re: A day in the life of ____________

Posted: Mon Apr 26, 2010 11:43 am
by GG Crono
[puts on editor's hat]

You should really lay off the parenthetical statements. They make the story look sloppy. If you want to convey something, describe it in the narrative. For example:

"Blah blah bloobity blah," mumbled Jimmy.

Or:

"Blingy blangy bleen bloon," said Sally, mumbling somewhat.

In addition, as demonstrated above, when following some dialogue with more narrative, the proper thing to do is to end the dialogue with a comma, rather than a period.

[takes off editor's hat]

There are two sides to writing: The creative and the technical. You're doing very well on the creative side of things. However, you need to work on the technical aspect a little.

You are not a bad writer. But there's always room to improve. :)

Re: A day in the life of ____________

Posted: Mon Apr 26, 2010 12:51 pm
by Snicket
Silentcook wrote:
Smoku wrote:DON'T GO ON THE BOAT, HISAO!!
Don't worry, that got removed in the end. :twisted:
Also, I am kinda amused at how the above user dropped to Guest this time around. :mrgreen:
Yeah, i don't know why i didn't log in. :?

Re: A day in the life of ____________

Posted: Mon Apr 26, 2010 2:04 pm
by neumanproductions
I hear that some people would like to see the Misha one, talking to you Snicket. For the story I have planned I have decided to either do a Kenji or Misha one last and second to last. There are reasons for this that I don't want to go into but I'll leave it up to the viewers to decide which one i'll write before the other. However, I will make the final decision. I plan for sure on Rin and then Hisao, followed by what seems to be the most popular.

Re: A day in the life of ____________

Posted: Mon Apr 26, 2010 2:31 pm
by Smoku
As I gathered my info, it seems that kosher is male. I also believe he's a working male, with a bit of time to write. and with a girlfriend/ wife.

Amiright?

<psychic mode off>
Wha? where am I?

Re: A day in the life of ____________

Posted: Mon Apr 26, 2010 3:22 pm
by Snicket
neumanproductions wrote:I hear that some people would like to see the Misha one, talking to you Snicket.
Hey it was just a suggestion.
Smoku wrote:As I gathered my info, it seems that kosher is male. I also believe he's a working male, with a bit of time to write. and with a girlfriend/ wife.
Yeah after thinking about it, i don't know where that 'comment' came from. I blame the 2 hours slept last night and the 3 cans of MT. Dew I drank before i wrote that.

Re: A day in the life of ____________

Posted: Mon Apr 26, 2010 6:22 pm
by neumanproductions
Snicket wrote:
neumanproductions wrote:I hear that some people would like to see the Misha one, talking to you Snicket.
Hey it was just a suggestion.
I wasn't trying to sound offensive but was rather making a reference towards you not having been logged in when you posted it. Sorry if it sounded on the contrary. I value all input and suggestions that people care to give and I also aim to please those who read my work. So I’m still open for whatever the order you guys want to see the story in. As I said, for reasons I can’t say writing one (Misha /Kenji) will destroy the surprise of the other. You'll definitely get a good hint in the Hisao chapter towards what's going to happen.

Re: A day in the life of ____________

Posted: Mon Apr 26, 2010 7:33 pm
by kosherbacon
Snicket wrote: Wait a minute, you're a girl? :shock:
:| What.
:? What?
:shock: WHAT?!

:lol: Oh you. That helped make my day.

Smoku's information is correct. Only thing to add is that I am unmarried and I would be absolutely hideous as a female.

Re: A day in the life of ____________

Posted: Mon Apr 26, 2010 7:56 pm
by Silentcook
It's probably the spoiler text here that confuzzled people, 'bacon. Clearly a case of unrealistic expectations and severe friendzoning. :wink:

Re: A day in the life of ____________

Posted: Mon Apr 26, 2010 10:39 pm
by kosherbacon
Mellowcorks wrote:[puts on editor's hat]
In addition, as demonstrated above, when following some dialogue with more narrative, the proper thing to do is to end the dialogue with a comma, rather than a period.
*Rereads all of my fanfics so far.*

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF-

:P Yeah, I'm the first to admit that dialogue-narrative integration ain't my strong point. But yeah, like he says, always room for everyone to improve.

Re: A day in the life of ____________

Posted: Tue Apr 27, 2010 12:07 am
by Snicket
neumanproductions wrote:
I wasn't trying to sound offensive but was rather making a reference towards you not having been logged in when you posted it. Sorry if it sounded on the contrary.
Actually to be honest i wouldn't be surprised if you were. I still don't know why i posted as guest nor why i made a suggestion on something that i really shouldn't be. These are you're ff and i have no right trying to change them.

kosherbacon wrote: Smoku's information is correct. Only thing to add is that I am unmarried and I would be absolutely hideous as a female.
Like i said, after thinking about it, i retraced my statement. Since I wasn't 'all there' when i made it.

-Blasted finals weeks :x

Re: A day in the life of ____________

Posted: Tue Apr 27, 2010 1:25 am
by PharaohSauron
Aww, Emi knows of the "Flat-Chested Alliance!"

Re: A day in the life of ____________

Posted: Tue Apr 27, 2010 1:38 am
by Csihar
PharaohSauron wrote:Aww, Emi knows of the "Flat-Chested Alliance!"
A flat chest is a status symbol! Extremely rare and valuable!