KS Shorts

WORDS WORDS WORDS
Post Reply
User avatar
Snicket
Posts: 1164
Joined: Sun May 10, 2009 4:15 am
Location: Cadillac Ranch

Re: KS Shorts

Post by Snicket » Wed Mar 24, 2010 4:56 am

Damn you Xp, I wrote this story a while back and for some reason the file got moved. Honestly i have no idea how/ why.

Anyway, this one is a continuation of 'Embrace,' one of my earlier ks shorts. Though i do admit, this one isn't short.

[edit:] Also before I get crap for this. I wrote this in the beginning or march. So if anything is this at related to something summit ed later this month, it's pure coincidental...I swear. I say this since, after first posting this, I noticed that KB had submitted something involving one of the characters in this one...one of the side characters.

Anyway, another FF for you folks...enjoy.

~Jump start


A sudden beep from my watch shakes me from my daze. I look up at my reflection in the mirror, then back at my watch.

‘Ok I have 5 minutes before I have to meet them.’

It’s been a month since this whole issue went from better to worse. I’ve been in an endless tug or war match between these two. If I didn’t know better I’d say that I was dealing with two other ‘girls’, but that’s not the case this time.

What’s even odder is that one of the girl’s older sisters has invited all three of us into town. Apparently wanting to ‘see what all the fuss has been about for herself.’ I chuckle at the thought as I adjust my tie.

‘The first time I met her, I thought she was a dude.’

I’d never say this out loud, since it would probably result in me getting either slapped or punched.

I take one last look at myself in the mirror before I tear off my uniform jacket and tie off in frustration.

‘I don’t need to wear all this crap.’

Unbuttoning my collar, I pull it upward and flick the edges a bit.

‘There, much better. Hm maybe I should wear something a little more casual.’

~Beep~

~Beep~

~Beep~

‘Shit no time, I only have 2 minutes now’

Grabbing my coat off the chair I down the usual assortment of pills and make a mad dash down the hall and towards the school court yard.

**

Carful not to overexert myself, I meet up with Lilly. Whose sitting on a near by bench.

“Sorry I’m late I lost track of time.”

Lilly smiles as I approach “You’re not late, Hisao I just got here myself.”

I glace down at my watch, the notice that Lilly is halfway threw some book in brail.

‘Yeah I am a good 3 minutes in fact.’

Figuring that Lilly is just being polite, I decide to not say anything about it and take a seat next to Lilly on the bench to her left.

“So uh where’s Hanako?”

Lilly jumps at my sudden question. “Oh Hanako, she’s uh running late…yeah.”

“Lilly.”

“I’m serious, she told me that we should give her a few minutes and if she doesn’t come then. We should leave with out her.”

I say nothing at the response. A part of me wanted to call this a bluff, but since her and Hanako have been acting rather strange since that day. Then again, it’s Lilly and I doubt she’d pull a stunt like that.

The two of us sit on the bench with out saying a word; I notice that Lilly is starting to inch herself closer to me. Though before I can say anything, the sound of crunching leaves in the distance breaks my concentration and draws my attention towards it.

As I turn around, I notice Hanako standing a few feet way clenching her hands together.

“I-I’m not i-interupting a-any thing am I?”

Turning towards Lilly, I notice that that’s she is only a few inches away from me. Her face is also close to mine. She much of thought I was facing her and thought that I saw her about to kiss me. Lilly cringes at the sudden interruption. Apparently she kept moving closer as I turned towards the sudden noise.

“N-no you didn’t interrupt anything. We were just talking.” I feel my face get red as I respond to Hanako’s question. “Why am I blushing?’

Lilly blinks a few times before saying anything. “Yeah we were just talking…”

Hanako’s upper lip starts to quiver, trying to hold back some powerful response or emotion.

‘She she probably thinks we’re lying to her.’

“Actually, that’s not entirely correct.”

Both the girls shift there heads back in confusion at my statement.

“T-then what w-were you two doing?”

“Well we were talking and Lilly wanted to tell me a secret, but you startled her. So that’s why you saw us in such a position….right Lilly.”

‘Hanako’s never gonna fall for that. Besides why am I trying to cover for something I didn’t have anything to do with? Lilly probably wouldn’t back me up anyway.’

“T-thanks right…We got to talking and I wanted to tell Hisao something.…Personal.”
Lilly turns away at the end of her blatant lie.

“W-what were you going to tell him?”

‘I don’t believe it, she actually bought it.’

Lilly frowns at Hanako’s comment. “Well if I said it out loud, it wouldn’t be a secret, would it?”

“N-no.”

“Alright then.”

With the possible disaster avoided, Hanako sits down next to me and rests her head on my left shoulder.

I open my mouth to say something, but stop as the girl nuzzles her head.

“Uh Hanako, what are you…”

“I-I was worried that you two would leave with out me..”

Freeing my hand, I place it on the girl’s shoulder. Hanako jumps at the sudden motion.

“We have to go, we’re already running late.”

I instantly kick myself for ruining the moment, but there wasn’t else I could do. That wouldn’t involve either of them getting angry with me.

‘Further more, why did Hanako just do that? It seems pretty gutsy, even for her.’

The question is answer ‘kinda’ as the both girls latch on my arms as I stand up.

“Hey what are you two….”

“T-this way Hisao, I-I know a short c-cut into town.”

“Now Hanako, it’s not polite to latch onto someone’s arm like that.”

“Then why did you do it?”

Lilly seems shocked at Hanako’s question.

“Well you see…..I forgot my cane and need some help getting into town.”

I almost want to stop both of them, since there both full of it. There is no short cut into town, nor has Lilly forgotten her walking stick. The damn this is sticking out of her bag.

It seems both of them seem to be trying (in there own way) to dominate the situation. Rather then make any mention of this; I allow the two to ‘guide’ me into town….playing tug a war with my arms in the process.

**

After what seems like hours (it actually probably only 15 minutes), we finally arrive at the entrance of town. Both girls’ are now squeezing my arms tightly, burying them into there chests. If they hadn’t gone numb from having them squeezed too much, I would have probably enjoyed it.

**

Continuing threw the small town we meet up with Akira; at least I think it’s her.

The person standing before us looks like Akira, but isn’t wearing a suit. Rather a light blue low cut dress, donning a yellow hand bag. I find my sight drawn towards the masses of exposed flesh.

Akira clears her throat. “My face is up here.”

“Eh? Oh sorry, I was just admiring your dress.”

“Rrrriiigghhht, any way place do you guy have in mind. Since I…”

“W-what were y-you staring at, Hisao?” Hanako says looking up at me

Akira lets out an annoyed sigh as she’s cut off by Hanako.

“I-I wasn’t staring, I was just admiring…”

“You were so staring Hisao.”

We both look over at Akira.

“No I-I wasn’t, I just..”

“Relax Hisao, you were probably just curious.”

“C-Curious?” Hanako says looking up at me.

“I don’t get it.”

“…” I feel my cheeks get red.

“Yeah think about it. The first time he saw me I was wearing a suit, but now I’m wearing..this. It’s one of those brain breaks or something.”

“Don’t you mean ‘brain breakage’?”

“No that’s not it, something about shaking ones assumptions about the nature of reality…or something.”

“M-mind…f-fuck.”

Everyone instantly turns towards Hanako.

“W-what? T-that’s w-what it’s called…a Mind fuck.”

Akira burst out laughing. “That’s it, Hanako with the assists.” Akira says holding up her hand in front of Hanako.

Hanako lightly taps her hand and quickly retracts it.

Akira frowns at the action. “C’mon that’s not how you do it. Hisao, if you please.”

I’m a little dumb struck by the sudden request, its’ not still Akira shakes her hand that I figure out what she meant.

“Oh, yeah sure.”

I raise my hand and hi-five Akira.

She laughs, puts her arm across my back, and starts leading me into town.

“Onward, to the promise land.” Akira says pointing ahead with her free hand.

“What?”

“Never mind.”

“Hey Akira.”

“Hm?”

“Why are you wearing a dress?”

“Why not? I have the day off, so why should I wear my work clothes.”

“S-sorry t-to that we’re scheduled this on your only d-day off.” A frightened voice says from behind me.

“Bah! don’t worry about it. I’m the one that invited you guys remember? Besides I wanted to see the guy that my sis has been going on about. Who would of thought it was you, hey Hisao.” Akira gives me a shake as she says this.

I feel my face get red.

“Now don’t exaggerate things. I’ve only mentioned Hisao a few times.”

“Pfft! Yeah right, you talk about him all the time.”

“I-I do not.”

Despite not being able to see Lilly’s face, I can guarantee that it’s bright red.

**

As we travel threw town, I can feel the cold stare of the girls behind me. While Akira continues to have her arm around me as we go through town. It’s not till we stop at a local restaurant that stops the cold chill running down my spine.

“The Shanghai, isn’t there any other restaurant in this town?” Akira says with a scoff.

Hanako shrugs in response, while Lilly say nothing.

“What about you, Hisao. Do you know of any other place?” Akira says turning towards me.

“I’m sorry I don’t. I haven’t explored too much of this town.”

Akira sighs. “I see.”

“Well this place isn’t so bad, the food is actually pretty good.”

“I know, but I just wanted to try something different.”

“Well we can always ask someone or keep looking.”

“Na, it’s alright. This place will do.”

**

As we enter the restaurant, we’re greeted by the always clumsy Yuuko.

“W-welc-come to the Shanghai, h-how many in your party?”

“Relax Yuuko, it’s just us.”

“y-yeah i-I know…”

Suddenly Yuuko drops a bunch of menus she was holding. They scatter all across the floor.

“Aww, O-oh no.” Yuuko says crouching down and picking up a few menus.

“I got it.” I say bending down.

“Me too.”

“M-me three.”

“What’s going on?” Lilly says turning her head side to side.

“Just hang back sis; the waiter dropped a few menus.”

The three of us pick up the scattered menus and hand them back to Yuuko.

“T-thanks.” A small voice says hiding its face behind the small pile of menus.

“Don’t worry about it.”

“It was nothing.”

“Y-you’re welcome.”

We there for a few minutes before Yuuko says anything.

“I-I’m s-sorry, I haven’t seated you 4 yet.”

“It’s ok Yuuko, no rush.”

The clumsy waitress sets the menus down on a near by stool and pulls out a clip board from behind a podium.

“Is a booth ok?”

“Sure. You guys don’t mind, right?” Akira says turning to the three of us.

“No.”

“Not at all.”

“I d-don’t mind.”

Yuuko grabs a few menus off the pile and looks up at us. “So, just you 4 then.”

“Yep, me, my bf and his friends.” Akira says wrapping her arm around me.

“Now knock that off!” Lilly snaps.

“Y-yeah.”

Akira raises her arms up. “Ok I’m sorry. Me, my sis, her two friends.”

“O-Ok, follow me.”

As Yuuko leads us through the restaurant, I find myself looking around at the customers at the other tables. A part of me is dreading running into Shizune and Misha here. Since it’s kinda their hand out. Fortunately, there not here….phew!

Hanako notices my ramped head movement and tugs my shirt sleeve.

“W-what wrong?”

“Nothing, I was just making sure that a certain pair isn’t present. Since they would really complicate things…more then they already are.”

“Oh.”

Finding an empty booth, Yuuko leads us to it and sets the menus on the table.

“I-I’ll get you 4 some water and your order in a minute.”

Before anyone can answer, Yuuko scurries off and disappears behinds a row of pillars.

Akira turns to me with a confused look on her face. “Is she always like that?”

“I’m afraid so.”

“Hm anyway, let’s take our seats.” Akira says sitting down and sliding towards the window.

Suddenly I’m pulled two different directions. I turn and notice that Lilly and Hanako are grabbing each of my arms.

“Sit next to me, Hisao.”

“N-No me, please.”

“…”

Akira lets out an annoyed sigh and stands up from her seat. “For peats sake, here!”

I’m suddenly pulled down next to Akira.

“Whoa!”

“H-hey!”

“What happened?”

“Y-your sister pulled, Hisao over to her side of the booth.”

Lilly frowns. “Why did you do that, we were…”

“Playing tug a war with this poor kid, I saw ya.”

The two girls seem shocked by Akira’s sudden out burst. “W-what are you talking about?”

“I don’t understand.”

Akira lets out another frustrated sigh and hold up the menu. “You’ve been dragging the poor kids around by his arms since you got into town.”

Lilly and Hanako sulk at the comment and hold up the menus to cover there faces. Though I don’t know why Lilly is holding the regular one and not the embossed one at the end of the table.

“I thought Hisao could use a break, so that’s why I had him sit here.”

Hanako peaks up from the top of the menu. “S-so you weren’t, trying to..”

Lilly drops her menu and turns towards Hanako.

“Relax you two…. wait you thought I was trying steal…Hisao?” Akira burst out laughing.

“Oh that’s funny, don’t you think Hisao?”

I silently not and hide my face behind one of the menus.

Lilly and Hanako seem relieved by this, but also embarrassed. Since they hide there faces again before saying anything.

**

As time passes, the four of us grown inpatient as Yuuko’s ‘few minutes’ starts to turn into 15 minutes.

“Hm, what’s taking her so long?”

I shrug. “I don’t know, maybe she’s busy or something.”

“Perhaps we should give her another few minutes. Then if she still doesn’t return, we should go some where else.” Lilly says folding her hands together.

Akira lets out a sigh and grabs a long twig thing from a container on the end of the table.

“What’s this?”

I turn towards the object. “No idea.”

“Well what ever it is, I’m eating it.” Akira says nibbling on the stick thing.

Suddenly a feel a vibration from my left leg, looking over I see Akira’s hand bad sitting between us.

“Uh I think your phone is..”

“Seriously?”

Reaching into the bag, Akira pulls out a silver and black cell phone. “Jeez 8 missed calls.”

Sliding out a little key pad from the side of the phone, Akira starts to punch the little keys on the phone; with a piece of the mysterious snack hanging out of her mouth, as she nibble one it.

“So uh, what to talk about?”

Lilly and Hanako turn towards me in response.

“You two have been pretty quiet, whats…”

A sudden nudge interrupts me; I turn and see Akira’s hand on my shoulder. “Move out, I need to make a call.”

I slide out and let Akira out of the booth before sitting back down.

“I’ll be right back, I need to take this.”

“Uh ok.”

As Akira disappears from sigh, I turn back towards Lilly and Hanako. “So what’s going on with you two? You’ve been acting pretty weird lately.”

‘I already know the answer to this question.’

“W-well you see, Hisao. W-we’ve worried that…”

Lilly cuts Hanako off. “We’re worried that you still can’t decide and….both of us are getting tired of waiting.”

The two girls turn away in embarrassment.

“I know that you’re worried about hurting one us, but…”

A sudden intrusion cuts Lilly off mid sentence. Looking over I notice Yuuko standing at the end of our table. “D-do you guys need another minute, or are you ready to order?”

“Uh Yuuko.”

“What is it Hisao?”

“We’re one person short, could you come back in a few minutes.”

“Y-yes o-of course, my apologizes.”

Yuuko suddenly darts off to another table.

“Hm, maybe we should have guessed what your sister wanted. I may be another 20 minutes before she comes back.”

The two girls giggle at my unintended humor.

“Yeah we could, but she probably wouldn’t like what we ordered.”

“I-I don’t mind waiting.”

**

With the passing minutes, neither Yuuko nor Akira returns. The three of us conversant till Akira’s sudden abrupt appearance, turns our attention to her.

“Sorry that it took so long, did that waiter come back when I was gone?”

Hanako silently nods.

“Yeah she did.” I say in a half sleepy tone.

“Son of a…argh!”

As Akira walks closer to the table, I attempt to slide out, but Akira stops me. “Just scoot in, there gonna keep bothering me.”

A few minutes later Yukko returns again and takes every ones order. Lilly orders the daily special, while Akira orders something from the high priced part of the menu. Hanako and I order some of the cheap stuff, so as to balance things out.

**

After ingesting an almost non filling hot dish, I slide my plate forward and set the used utensils on top of it.

“Someone was hungry.” Akira says motioning to my empty plate.

“Indeed.”

“Good now that you’re finished, I need to talk to you about something.”

“What’s that?”

“Follow me.”

Before I can protest/ agree to such a notion. I’m more or less pulled out of the booth and towards the back of the restaurant.
**

Releasing my hand, Akira turns towards me and crosses her arms.

“I suppose you know what I wanted to talk to you about.”

“No what is it.”

‘I know exactly what it is…I think.’

“It’s about your relationship with my sister and…”

I shush Akira with my finger. “If its that she’s a great person that I should choose her…forget it. I already know that, I’m just…”

Akira yanks my hand away. “No I’m not telling you who to choose, but that you need to choose someone. You can keep doing this forever. Sooner or later they’ll…”

“I know, I know, but I just can’t right now.”

“Well…you…have…to choose…noowwww”

‘What the hell? Everything is in slow motion.’

“Hhhhiiiirrraaassiioo, yyyoooou nnneeeddd tttooo mmmaaakkee aaa chhh…”

Suddenly my legs start to feel rubbery and I’m unable to hold myself up. I unintentionally fall into Akira.

~squish~

“H-hey, what are y-you d-doing? I-I let this morning’s incident slide, but…”

‘Well at least the slow motion thing went away, but why can’t I say anything?’

“Hisao, you ok?”

I try to say something, but my voice seems to be paralyzed. As my vision fades and I can no longer sense the surroundings, I muse to myself as I lose conchesness.

‘What great timing for something like this to…hhhaaapppeeennn!!!’

“Aww!”

A sudden burst of…something shoots threw my body. Waking me from my pre conches state.
My eyes shoot open and I see Yuuko standing before me, capping a syringe.

“What the hell did you just do to me?”

“She saved you life.”

I look up and notice that Akira in above me. Rather she’s on the floor holding me up while Yuuko did what ever the hell she did.

“Thanks, sorry for snapping at you.”

“I-It’s ok, I know you didn’t mean it.” Yuuko says stuffing the syringe into her pocket.

“I got it; I’ll make sure he gets back alright.” Akira says as she helps me to my feet.

“O-Ok, I’ll leave him in your hands.”

With that Yuuko dashes off and disappears.

Watching this, I notice that my shirt has been torn open, exposing my ugly scare for the world to see. Akira turns towards me and starts buttoning up my shirt.

“Sorry, I tried to make sure she didn’t ruin your shirt, but I think she got a few anyway.”

“What happened?”

“You don’t remember?”

“Well some, I remember falling and then….” I feel my cheeks get hot.

“Don’t worry about that, I’m just glade your ok and that waitress knew of your condition.”

“Luckily I found that waitress, I tried giving you CPR, but nothing it didn’t do any good.”

Suddenly I notice an odd taste in my mouth, though I don’t say anything about it, rather I try to move on with the conversaion.

“I’m just curious why she had that syringe in the first place.”

Akira shrugs. “I’m just glade she had it.”

“Me too.”

Brushing the little bits of what ever off my shirt, Akira straitens out my collar (despite my protest) and glares at me.

“So that this why your unable to make a decision?”

I lower my head and look down at the floor.

“Hm, I see. Well that makes sense now.”

I look up at Akira. “I’d prefer that you didn’t mention what happened to Lilly or Hanako.”

“Do they know of your condition?”

“Some what, but they probably don’t know how sever it is. I’d like to keep it that way till I’m sure about something.”

“Well I don’t condone your morals; I do respect your efforts to not cause either of them any worry. But it’s gonna end up biting you in the ass.”

“I know, but..”

“But nothing, tell them so they know.”

I let out a sigh and return my focus back towards the floor.

“I’ll leave that to you, I’m not going to say anything.”

“Really?” I say looking up at Akira.

“Really, but you have to promise me you’ll tell them.”

I nod in agreement.

“Alright then, let’s go.”

**

Returning to the table, Hanako and Lilly both look worried at we return.

“What took you two so long? Did something happen?”

“Y-you two didn’t…”

“No, no nothing like that. Me and Hisao just go to talking and didn’t realize long we were gone.”

“Oh, well ok.”

“G-good.”

**

As Yuuko delivers the check, Akira snatches it away and grabs a fistful of money from her hand bag and slaps in on the table.

“It’s nice that you offered to pay Hisao, but I invited you guys. It wouldn’t be right for you to have to pay.”

‘She has a point.’

**

As we depart the restaurant and go our separate ways, Akira suddenly stops me.

“Hold on for a sec, Hisao.”

“What is it..mmhhhmm”

Out of no ware, Akira suddenly kisses me. It comes at me as a total surprise. I can hear the shrieks of the girls behind me as this occurs.

Pulling away, Akira looks at me with a hint of blush on her face.

“hm, intresting.”

[end?]

User avatar
Smoku
Posts: 687
Joined: Sat Jan 23, 2010 1:39 pm
Location: My own world

Re: KS Shorts

Post by Smoku » Wed Mar 24, 2010 2:03 pm

Snickenator strikes again!
Akira is hawt Cool story, bro.

User avatar
kosherbacon
Posts: 903
Joined: Fri Dec 04, 2009 7:30 pm
Location: San Jose, CA, USA
Contact:

Re: KS Shorts

Post by kosherbacon » Thu Mar 25, 2010 12:41 am

You say this story is from a while back, eh? Then I'mma assume that it's old-Yuuko that saved Hisao's life. NuYuuko wouldn't be awesome enough to carry epinephrine syringes around with her. :lol:

Anyways...

Akira= :D
Akira in dress= Image

Don't hold out on me, man! I wanna see where this is going!

User avatar
Mag
Posts: 80
Joined: Tue Mar 02, 2010 11:37 pm
Contact:

Re: KS Shorts

Post by Mag » Thu Mar 25, 2010 3:31 am

lmao that was a pretty good story. When Hanako snuggled her face in Hisao's shoulder when they were on the bench, I just slammed my head into my table and pounded my fist into it yelling, "KAWAIIIIIIIII!" (Yes I am a Hanako fan.) I also enjoyed the tug-of-war scene while walking towards the town. Too bad Hisao's arms got numb. The scene where both the girls wanted Hisao to sit right next to them was a scene i should have seen coming but didn't for some odd reason. Also sucks how Hisao's heart just gave like that when he was having a serious talk with Akira. Awesome Yuuko with the epinephrine syringe. Plus, Akira in a dress........I wouldn't mind seeing someone draw that. I got a good picture in my head but it would be interesting to see it on paper. I just have one last thing to say about the story... WTF AKIRA? WHY DID SHE KISS HISAO AT THE END? ESPECIALLY IN FRONT OF HANAKO AND LILLY? Ok I'm done. Great story. If possible, please end it. An idea of how to end it is set up a scenario where Hisao is sitting either in his room or outside on a bench and thinking on who to choose. Then make a section A and B making Hanako A and Lilly B (or the other way around, which ever is comfortable with you.) and the readers can just choose which one to read. My opinion though. Sorry if it looks like I'm giving you commands or anything which, of course, I don't mean to. I just like how this story is going and would love to see an ending to it. Also possibly an elaborate explanation on why Akira kissed Hisao. Again, not giving orders or anything, just an idea.

User avatar
kosherbacon
Posts: 903
Joined: Fri Dec 04, 2009 7:30 pm
Location: San Jose, CA, USA
Contact:

Re: KS Shorts

Post by kosherbacon » Thu Mar 25, 2010 3:53 am

Mag wrote: WTF AKIRA? WHY DID SHE KISS HISAO AT THE END? ESPECIALLY IN FRONT OF HANAKO AND LILLY?
Akira obviously kissed Hisao so that Hanako and Lilly would snap out of it and realize that they aren't actually in love with Hisao but actually each other...

I'm just kidding. I've got a more plausible theory but I'll wait till the next chapter comes up.

User avatar
Snicket
Posts: 1164
Joined: Sun May 10, 2009 4:15 am
Location: Cadillac Ranch

Re: KS Shorts

Post by Snicket » Thu Mar 25, 2010 12:34 pm

whoa i didn't think i'd get such a strong reaction to this one. Honestly i thought that most of the input would be negative since i kinds went in an odd direction.

chaix
Posts: 82
Joined: Tue Dec 22, 2009 8:51 pm

Re: KS Shorts

Post by chaix » Fri Mar 26, 2010 1:08 am

it's not odd, not anymore anyways. the weirdness tolerance has gone way up, therefore this is now considered 'tame' :p

Good read as usual though.

User avatar
kosherbacon
Posts: 903
Joined: Fri Dec 04, 2009 7:30 pm
Location: San Jose, CA, USA
Contact:

Re: KS Shorts

Post by kosherbacon » Fri Mar 26, 2010 1:10 am

chaix wrote:the weirdness tolerance has gone way up, therefore this is now considered 'tame' :p
Yeah, sorry about that.

No I'm not! :lol:

Hey Chaix, any new FFs coming from you soon? I really enjoy your work.

User avatar
Mag
Posts: 80
Joined: Tue Mar 02, 2010 11:37 pm
Contact:

Re: KS Shorts

Post by Mag » Fri Mar 26, 2010 1:51 am

Hey its not odd. The only thing I find to be a problem is the usual mistakes and spelling errors. Although I can be nit picky about those stuff considering my major is English in college. Don't mind me though. A story that is written perfectly, grammar wise, can have a horrible story while a story with bad grammar can be great.

User avatar
Snicket
Posts: 1164
Joined: Sun May 10, 2009 4:15 am
Location: Cadillac Ranch

Re: KS Shorts

Post by Snicket » Fri Mar 26, 2010 2:23 am

@Mag

Well as i mentioned before, English isn't my first language. So I'm bound to make an error or two...or eight for that matter. If you want you can proof read these and I'll summit the 'corrected' versions.

User avatar
Mag
Posts: 80
Joined: Tue Mar 02, 2010 11:37 pm
Contact:

Re: KS Shorts

Post by Mag » Fri Mar 26, 2010 2:43 am

No no no. That is if YOU want me to proof read them. Honestly this is your work and you can do whatever you wish with them. I'm just one of those guys who complains about the errors but obviously the errors don't take away the story at all. If you want it to be corrected, I would gladly help. But if you don't want to, then don't. Everyone can still read it as it is.

User avatar
kosherbacon
Posts: 903
Joined: Fri Dec 04, 2009 7:30 pm
Location: San Jose, CA, USA
Contact:

Re: KS Shorts

Post by kosherbacon » Fri Mar 26, 2010 2:49 am

@snicket. If you'd like, I can pre-read for you too. I myself am constantly catching myself in grammar mistakes but I can help out with what slips past spell checks.

User avatar
Snicket
Posts: 1164
Joined: Sun May 10, 2009 4:15 am
Location: Cadillac Ranch

Re: KS Shorts

Post by Snicket » Fri Mar 26, 2010 4:06 pm

Well if either of you guys want to help me with these that would be great. I could either post them here and then have you guys fix all the 'mistakes' and PM it back to me. Or I could PM them to one of you and have you make the corrections before i post them.

The only reason i brought thus up, is because another member used to so the the same thing for me a while back.

-Also i have another short in the works, i'm just trying to thin is out. Since its around 15 pages and is no ware close to being done. Though with my current writing style, if you were to out put it all together. It would probably only around 8 pages.

User avatar
kosherbacon
Posts: 903
Joined: Fri Dec 04, 2009 7:30 pm
Location: San Jose, CA, USA
Contact:

Re: KS Shorts

Post by kosherbacon » Fri Mar 26, 2010 4:30 pm

I'm okay with getting PM'd in advance. The other way is fine, too.

User avatar
Mag
Posts: 80
Joined: Tue Mar 02, 2010 11:37 pm
Contact:

Re: KS Shorts

Post by Mag » Fri Mar 26, 2010 5:17 pm

Same here.

Post Reply