Mirrors of the Sun

WORDS WORDS WORDS
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Aura
>has heterochromia
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Mirrors of the Sun

Post by Aura » Mon Apr 27, 2009 5:23 am

A little writing sketch, trying to change trains of thought.


It is one of those perfect autumn days, the very picture of what you think when you imagine how an autumn day should be. The colour of the sky has already started turning pale in anticipation of winter, but the sun is still shining brightly from that cloudless, silvery-blue sky. The sound of a cool breeze rustling the fallen maple leaves is your background music. The feel of the thick coat and scarf against the chilly air, and the slow moments of fabric on your skin are like a warm blanket all around you. That's how this day feels like.

The tiny park is void of people except them, which fits her just fine. The little girl runs ahead and jumps straight into a huge pile of dry leaves, squealing with delight. Hands deep in the pocket of her long overcoat, the young woman idly follows with her gaze. She smiles privately at the energy and innocence of the child. Babysitting is not too bad, even though this one is not a baby anymore.

As if sensing she's being watched, the little girl looks back at her keeper. Small mouth turns into a wide, innocent smile, and she waves happily in a wide arc. The woman waves back, of course, thinking how the girl seems to always be moving at full ahead, no energy conserved anywhere. Must be nice to be a child.

She sits on a bench and leans back, letting the wind caress her face and hair. There's nobody around here to watch anyway, so she can afford being a little careless today. The can of hot coffee is slowly cooling, but it still gives off some warmth, nested between her fingers. A whole afternoon with nothing to do must be the most relaxing thing in the world.

The little girl skips to the bench as well, with a healthy rose colour on her cheeks and pale blue eyes gleaming with enthusiasm. She looks so much like her mother. Same blue eye colour, same blonde colour of hair. And like her mother, she's sure to capture quite a few hearts when she grows up.

A tiny sigh escapes her lips. The emotions around that sigh twirl around the back of her head for a moment, until she pushes them away. The girl, maybe sensing her uneasiness, reaches her hand up to touch the silky strands of raven black hair that covers one side of her face.

"Auntie Hanako… you have a really pretty hair."

"Thank you, sweetie."

The hand disappears under her bangs, touching the skin of her cheek. The girl's small fingers trace through the crevices and ridges of the scar tissue, just like her fingers... in another time, another place.

"Auntie Hanako, why is it like this?"

"Hmm... When I was little girl like you... well, maybe a bit older, I got into an accident"

"Did it hurt?"

"Yes, it did. It hurt very badly."

The little girl scrunches her face, making a difficult expression. She can feel the disjunction between what Hanako says and the calm, simple way she explains. She can tell there is something wrong. Coming to a conclusion, she frowns.

"Were you sad?"

A sigh escapes her lips, again. She would rather not return to these memories in her mind to answer the child, but denying her the answer would not do.

"Yes…. I was sad for the longest time. You wouldn't believe it if I told you just how sad I was and for how long it was."

"Are you still sad?"

The girl looks upwards, staring hard at her with those pale blue eyes. Like mirrors of the sun they reflect the daylight, almost shining in the exact colour of the perfect autumn sky.

"No..."

"No, I don't think I am sad any more."
<Aura> would you squeeze a warm PVC bottle between your thighs and call it "manaka-chan"
<Suriko> I would do it if it wouldn't be so hard to explain to my parents

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EmP|ty
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Re: Mirrors of the Sun

Post by EmP|ty » Mon May 11, 2009 6:38 pm

damnit why end there, that was intriguing.
If you ever need to break through writers block or anything or feel the need to do a little writing sketch as you call it, please try and continue this lol...

stranger
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Re: Mirrors of the Sun

Post by stranger » Mon May 11, 2009 8:12 pm

Intriguing, I suppose. Are all the devs this into Hanako?
remember to take your meds, kids

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WASSHOI
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Re: Mirrors of the Sun

Post by WASSHOI » Tue May 12, 2009 12:32 am

Aura wrote: "Auntie Hanako… you have a really pretty hair."
D'awwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
This short story put a wide smile on my face. Exactly what I'd like to read before heading to sleep for the night.
EmP|ty wrote:damnit why end there, that was intriguing.
If you ever need to break through writers block or anything or feel the need to do a little writing sketch as you call it, please try and continue this lol...
I think it was nice where it ended. The story didn't need more than that to convey what it did. I like leaving whatever blanks that were left to the imagination.

Jyo_ni
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Re: Mirrors of the Sun

Post by Jyo_ni » Wed May 20, 2009 6:51 am

This was a beautiful piece of writing :) So what I thought I'd do was make a.......erm a plagiarised parody? Basically Aura's story is the same(almost word for word) except instead of Hanako its Kenji.


---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It is one of those perfect autumn days, the very picture of what you think when you imagine how an autumn day should be. The colour of the sky has already started turning pale in anticipation of winter, but the sun is still shining brightly from that cloudless, silvery-blue sky. The sound of a cool breeze rustling the fallen maple leaves is your background music. The feel of the thick coat and scarf against the chilly air, and the slow moments of fabric on your skin are like a warm blanket all around you. That's how this day feels like.

The tiny park is void of people except them, which suits him perfectly. The little girl runs ahead and jumps straight into a huge pile of dry leaves, squealing with delight. Hands deep in the pocket of his long overcoat, the young man calmly follows with his gaze, just being able to make out the energetic shape. He smiles privately at the energy and innocence of the child. Babysitting is not too bad, even though this one is not a baby anymore.

As if sensing she's being watched, the little girl looks back at her protector. Small mouth turns into a wide, innocent smile, and she waves happily in a wide arc. The man waves back, of course, thinking how the girl seems to always be moving at full ahead, no energy conserved anywhere. Must be nice to be one of “them”; he jokingly muses.

He sits on a bench and leans back, letting the wind caress his face and hair. There's nobody around here to watch anyway, so he can afford being a little careless today. The styrofoam cup of hot sencha tea is slowly cooling, but it still gives off some warmth, nested between his fingers. A whole afternoon with nothing to do must be the most relaxing thing in the world.

The little girl skips to the bench as well, with a healthy rose colour on her cheeks and pale blue eyes gleaming with enthusiasm. She looks so much like her mother. Same blue eye colour, same blonde colour of hair. And like her mother, she's sure to capture quite a few hearts when she grows up.

A small grunt escapes his throat. The emotions around that grunt twirl around the back of his head for a moment, until he pushes them away. The girl, maybe sensing his uneasiness, reaches her hand up to trace the rugged contours of his face, closing her eyes as she does so, mirroring almost too well what she’s seen her mother do many times before. Her eyes open and once more he finds himself under their curious pale blue gaze.

"Uncle Kenji…you’re really manly."

"Thank you, pumpkin."

The hand continues tracing above the eyes, touching the skin of his of his forehead. The girl's small fingers trace through the crevices and ridges of the lightning bolt shaped scar tissue, just like her fingers... in another time, another place.

"Uncle Kenji, why is it like this?"

"Hmm... When I was little tyke like you...well, just a bit older, I thought and did some foolish things"

"Did it hurt?"

"Yes, it did. It hurt very badly."

The little girl scrunches her face, making a difficult expression. She can feel the disjunction between what Kenji says and the calm, simple way he explains. She can tell there is something wrong.
Coming to a conclusion, she frowns.

"Were you sad?"

A grunt escapes his throat, again. He would rather not return to these memories in his mind to answer the child, but denying her the answer would not do.

"Yes…. I was sad and angry for the longest time. You wouldn't believe it if I told you just how sad and angry I was and for how long it was."

"Are you still mad?"

The girl looks upwards, staring worriedly at him with anxious pale blue eyes. An expression of the like which would cause him to clutch at his chest.

"No, I’m not so mad any more."

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Squirg
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Re: Mirrors of the Sun

Post by Squirg » Wed May 20, 2009 7:31 am

Aura wrote:Hands deep in the pocket of her long overcoat, the young woman idly follows with her gaze.
It should be ... a young woman in that sentence, since you haven't introduced Hanako (in this story anyways) yet. Otherwise, it's a very nice story. The stuff you dream about after having a wonderful day. Well written and well executed, I liked the feeling of remembrance the short brought.
Image

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SnigendePind
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Re: Mirrors of the Sun

Post by SnigendePind » Wed May 20, 2009 9:02 am

Jyo_ni wrote: "Uncle Kenji…you’re really manly."

"Thank you, pumpkin."
I lol'd! xD
Some people don't have arms. So what? Some people don't see colors, either.
- WetCrate

<@Raide> why does it sad to be touched? shouldn't you get a boner?

90% of the students were actually sent to Yamaku for being too lesbian. All those disabilities going around are just curious coincidence.
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Made you look.

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Revenant0519
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Re: Mirrors of the Sun

Post by Revenant0519 » Wed May 20, 2009 3:11 pm

that was so beautiful it almost bring tears to my eyes

DuaneMoody
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Re: Mirrors of the Sun

Post by DuaneMoody » Wed May 20, 2009 3:31 pm

It's nice. Thanks for sharing.

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Srikali
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Re: Mirrors of the Sun

Post by Srikali » Fri Jun 05, 2009 10:33 am

I like the story, but there is one little thing that is driving me insane! For Lilly's daughter, it would be very unlikely if not impossible, genetically speaking, for her to have both blond hair and blue eyes. There, got the crazy out of the way...
Rue rue, combat the government.

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Painiac
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Re: Mirrors of the Sun

Post by Painiac » Fri Jun 05, 2009 11:07 am

Detail. And, it isn't impossible.
No time for love, Falcon Punch!
Polish translation:
Wednesday - 50%

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nANDE
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Re: Mirrors of the Sun

Post by nANDE » Fri Jun 05, 2009 4:53 pm

Yea. My eyes are blue and hair .. blond :)
//
Nice little story, I like it.
We all are rowing the boat of fate
The waves keep on coming and we can't escape
But if we ever get lost on our way
The waves would guide you through another day

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U.T. Raptor
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Re: Mirrors of the Sun

Post by U.T. Raptor » Fri Jun 05, 2009 5:53 pm

That's a more badass title than this story really deserves...

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Aura
>has heterochromia
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Re: Mirrors of the Sun

Post by Aura » Sat Jun 06, 2009 3:29 pm

It's a generally accepted fact that I'm better at coming up with titles than writing.
<Aura> would you squeeze a warm PVC bottle between your thighs and call it "manaka-chan"
<Suriko> I would do it if it wouldn't be so hard to explain to my parents

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SirMax
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Re: Mirrors of the Sun

Post by SirMax » Sat Jun 06, 2009 3:59 pm

Jyo_ni wrote: The hand continues tracing above the eyes, touching the skin of his of his forehead. The girl's small fingers trace through the crevices and ridges of the lightning bolt shaped scar tissue, just like her fingers... in another time, another place.

"Uncle Kenji, why is it like this?"

"Hmm... When I was little tyke like you...well, just a bit older, I thought and did some foolish things"
Bwahaha! That's amazing.
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