Flutter - Level Twenty One: Footsies [25/3/17]

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Oscar Wildecat
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Re: Flutter - Level Three: Hitboxes [27/2/16]

Post by Oscar Wildecat » Sat Feb 27, 2016 9:42 pm

I may have more to say later; but, right now I'll say that this story is so sweet, I'm turning into Ikuno... :D (Good thing I love sweet stories.)
I like all the girls in KS, but empathize with Hanako the most.
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Hesmiyu
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Re: Flutter - Level Three: Hitboxes [27/2/16]

Post by Hesmiyu » Sun Feb 28, 2016 3:11 am

Sharp-O wrote:
Gajzla wrote:Nice chapter once again. I was confused as well by what actually happened in the pool, but I guess thats the perils of writing while drugged. :) Hope you're feeling better.
Thanks Gaj! I'm actually not feeling any better but, at the very least, I'm getting a sense of what it's like to be Natsume day-to-day and trust me when I say that she'd be a (rightly) frustrated, cantankerous grump most of the time.

"Why can't I hold this fucking pen? It takes me 20 minutes to put on a god damn sock! Naomi, please open this bottle before I throw it at Maeda."
Sounds like you know what story to write after you've finished up with Rika's :P

Also enjoyed this chapter (after re-reading end of last one).
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Re: Flutter - Level Three: Hitboxes [27/2/16]

Post by swampie2 » Sun Feb 28, 2016 11:27 am

it goes without saying that you need to avoid anymore of these... flutters
Roll credits? :lol:

I've gotta say, this story seems to be moving kind of fast, and I like it. There wasn't 8 chapters establishing why the character came to Yamaku and what their favorite type of cereal is. I think it'd be a problem if your characters weren't so alive, but as it stands this is a very organic story, at least from my perspective.

Awesome job as always sharp, I'm interested to see where this will go.
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Re: Flutter - Level Three: Hitboxes [27/2/16]

Post by Sharp-O » Sun Feb 28, 2016 12:24 pm

swampie2 wrote:
it goes without saying that you need to avoid anymore of these... flutters
Roll credits? :lol:
TITLE DROP! *air horns and wubstep*
swampie2 wrote:I've gotta say, this story seems to be moving kind of fast, and I like it. There wasn't 8 chapters establishing why the character came to Yamaku and what their favorite type of cereal is. I think it'd be a problem if your characters weren't so alive, but as it stands this is a very organic story, at least from my perspective.
I think Monomyth took so long because A) it was my first proper fic and 2) because Taro, Ritsu and Akio had basically nothing to them. Rika at least had a basic story background that I could work into. Given the amount of fics already written about her, it would have also been a tad wasteful in my eyes to spend three chapters explaining her backstory. Yes, it'll get explained but it's not going to be the focus and I hope everyone enjoys what's to come.

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Re: Flutter - Level Three: Hitboxes [27/2/16]

Post by swampie2 » Sun Feb 28, 2016 2:30 pm

Sharp-O wrote:Yes, it'll get explained but it's not going to be the focus and I hope everyone enjoys what's to come.
I think the reason I enjoy this format is because it's like we're in Rika's brain. Rika wouldn't be standing around thinking about her past unless there was something that reminded her or prompted that. Plus there will be a point where Rika will tell Hisao about her past so things can be revealed that way.
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Flutter - Level Four: Guard Break [1/3/16]

Post by Sharp-O » Mon Feb 29, 2016 9:25 pm

“You are such a cheating-ass, button-mashing scrub, Hisao Nakai!” I growl as another K-O! booms from the TV. The cocksure grin of my opponent does little but infuriate me further.

“No one likes a sore loser, Rika.” He mocks with that stupid, handsome face of his as Fuuka giggles to herself; laying flat on my bed with her chin resting across her folded arms, watching intently as I get my butt handed to me for the third time in a row.

“Man, I have never seen you get this pissy about losing before…” She offers, an air of surprise in her voice that I do not appreciate.

“I’m only getting so salty because senpai suck-butt here,” I gesture to Hisao who begins laughing at my lame insult as the character selection screen pops up and he chooses Law. Yet again. “Keeps choosing the same damn character! There he goes again!”

“I thought you said you knew all the match-ups?” Hisao chuckles and I glare in response. “Yeah, but someone keeps flash-kicking me twice in the face every round!”

“There is a block button!” Hisao interjects and I glare even harder, fully aware of that but having never mastered it because defence is for losers.

Fuuka and Hisao continue to laugh and I decide to play dirty and select Christie. If senpai wants to button-mash, I’ll give him a button-mash…

Immediately, Hisao is put on the defensive as an incredibly attractive fighter plays out her intro on-screen. I turn to him and, in unison with my new avatar, say “Go easy on me!”. The blush that erupts in his cheeks all but seals the deal as the round begins.

Round 1! Fight!

He goes for the old faithful but my character’s capoeira style side-steps it immediately and I spend the rest of the round pressing a flurry of quarter circles and random button taps. It’s by no means perfect but it’s a butt-kicking he didn’t see coming. The second round plays out much the same but Hisao puts up a better fight at least. I hate to admit it but he has gotten better.

“And that is what happens when you talk smack, boy!” I toss the controller onto the carpet in front of my crossed legs and throw my arms out wide in triumph. Hisao groans with a smile and leans back on his hands.

“She’s a sore winner too.” Fuuka chuckles and Hisao nods ruefully. “Oh, I’m fully aware of that.” He responds and I bop his arm.

“I’m a humble and gracious winner, scrub-pai now pick up that controller so I can whoop your butt again!” I grin and Hisao slips further down onto his back.

“Nah, I’m good. I’m retiring as the undisputed champ of the day. You may leave accolades at my feet if you wish.” He sighs and closes his eyes with a contented smile.

“Undisputed!? I beat you! You were totally disputed! Fuuka?” I shove his side and then crane my neck back to Fuuka, who is snaking her way off my bed and into her stationary chair.

“I didn’t see nothin’. Hisao’s the champ.” Fuuka announces, hoping her raised hands will somehow soften the sting of betrayal. It doesn’t.

“Thank you, Fuuka.”

“You’re welcome, Hisao. I’m gonna have to love you and leave you, peeps; I got groceries to get.” She responds in a sickeningly sweet tone before offering a goodbye. I hop from my knees to my feet and escort her to the door.

“Are you sure you don’t want me to go with you?” I ask and she shakes her head before leaning closer. “Nah, I’ve only got a couple things to get. Besides, wouldn’t want to play third wheel to you and your senpai.” She winks playfully and I have to push her out of my room before she really starts messing with me.

OKAYFUUKA, THANKSFORCOMING, SEEYA!” The door slams shut and I breath a sigh of relief.

“Is that how you treat all your guests?” Hisao chuckles, his arms folded behind his head for support. I throw the pillow Fuuka was using for support at Hisao as I plonk down on my bed, the former hitting my guest with a soft plush sound not too dissimilar to the noise my bed makes.

“Ow! Okay, okay, you won the last round!” He concedes as he rolls himself into a sitting position once more. “So what do you want to do now?”

“I have no idea…” I huff, resting back on my hands while stretching my legs off the edge of my bed. “I’d usually go straight into doing homework but that’s not very sociable, is it?” I chuckle weakly.

“It can be. I can go grab my homework and we can have a little study session if you want.” He offers with a sweet smile but I wave him off.

“Wouldn’t be much fun, I reckon, especially since our work is, like, a year apart.”

“You haven’t quite made it to the hardest difficulty, right.” Hisao ponders with a smirk, recalling what I told him when he asked which class I was in and was shocked to find I was in the year below him. “Well, I know some of my classmates are going down to the Shanghai for dinner and asked me to tag along. You wanna come?”

Oh no… I couldn’t intrude on his other circle of friends. Not that I count for much of a circle. Plus my social links outside of Fuuka, Hisao and the Doc are pretty weak… “I don’t know…”

“If I remember rightly, you’ve met Arai and Kapur before,” He explains and I furrow my brow. Kapur’s the British girl Fuuka hangs out with sometimes, right? Arai is… the fat guy Hisao was with a couple weeks back? Whoa… Time flies, huh? Regardless, Arai and Kapur seem okay enough. “Hayashi is pretty much just a male Fuuka, so you can just treat him the same as her if you’d like; we pretty much do. There’s also his boyfriend-”

BOYFRIEND!?” If I had been drinking, I imagine I’d have spat it the entire distance between Hisao and I. Hisao’s nonplussed expression tells me it’s not that big a deal, to him at least, so I purse my lips in embarrassment — allowing him to continue.

“Yeah, his boyfriend; Suzumiya. You… cool with that kind of thing?” He asks cautiously and I realise my reaction might come off as a bit — scratch that, comes off as a lot — weird.

“No! Not at all! I’m totally cool with it! Cool as ice, even!” I ramble, my argument doing little to help my case as I seemingly try to back peddle out of being a homophobe. “I’ve just… never… met any… gay people…” I quietly admit and Hisao laughs. Not outside of dating sims anyway…

“It’s okay, Rika, neither had I before Hayashi told me.” He pulls his phone out and begins texting. “But like I said, Akio’s just a male Fuuka and Haru’s okay but he can come off as a bit aloof if he doesn’t find you interesting.”

“Right… Okay…” I comment, mostly to fill the air while I try to think of a way out of this… group outing I’ve now found myself party to. I run out of time as Hisao snaps his phone closed with a huge grin.

“There we go, all sorted. We’ll meet them at the Shanghai at five.” He announces and respond with the most half-hearted double thumbs-up in the history of the world.

Yaaaaay…

-----------

I expected the Shanghai to be much busier for a Saturday evening but the smattering of old couples and Yamaku students barely fills half of the café. Jitters doesn’t seem to be working today, our waitress a much younger girl — she can’t be any older than us, really — who must be a part-timer or the owner’s granddaughter or something.

She brought me a dainty little tea cup full of decaffeinated tea while Hisao ordered a larger mug of black coffee. The stench is almost overpowering, even from across the booth where I anxiously sit; listening to Hisao explain the dynamic of his classroom and the particular group of friends who’ll be joining us. I’m only catching bits of pieces as I stare at the amber liquid before me.

Why am I even here? What am I meant to have in common with a class clown, a one-armed artist, a clumsy British-Indian and a track-star with ADHD. Apparently Arai and Kapur are pretty close, both being English-speakers and massive geeks according to Hisao so I might be able to strike up a conversation with them but Hayashi and Suzumiya could be awkward, purely because I have no experience when it comes to gay people so that’s going to be… interesting.

I reach for my cup and find a hand soon covering mine. I look up to the worried face of Hisao.

“You’ve barely said a word since we got here. Are you okay?” He asks earnestly and I nod rapidly, staring at his hand on mine like a freak. The anxiety of meeting a bunch of new people already has me on edge but now Hisao’s tender touch… It’s really getting hot in here…

“Can you k-keep a secret?” I ask nervously and he nods. “I’m not very good at meeting new people.”

“You never really struck me as the shy type before.”

“Hisao, do you see me hanging out with anyone other than you or Fuuka?” I pose the question and Hisao leans back, giving it more genuine thought than I imagined he’d need. It’s pretty obvious really.

“I guess not…” His eyes lock with mine and I have to look away.

“You guys are literally my only friends. And I’m fine with that. I’m happy with two good friends.” I smile a little to ease his concern before breaking out the secret origin.

“Fuuka actually approached me on our first day. I think everyone else had partnered up and I was the only one left but, whatever the reason, I’m super glad. That first day was so nerve-wracking and her constant jokes at the expense of our classmates weirdly put me at ease…”

“I know first-hand how that kind of personality can be infectious!” He jokes, probably referring to this Hayashi guy.

“And then there’s you,” I smile a little broader and Hisao smiles back with the tiniest hint of a blush. “Have to admit… I actually wanted to meet you before we bumped into each other at the post office… I saw you in the--” Not the Doc’s office, not the Doc’s office, not the Doc’s office! “… Halls, I think you were with the student council, and there was just something about you.” The fact that your condition is almost exactly the same as mine.

I can feel my pulse quickening as all the blood in my body rushes to my pale face and I bet my cheeks match my eyes right now. Probably not a good look but I’ve come this far. “I know we both end up wiped out because of that hill but… I’m super glad to have met you too Hisao.” I smile earnestly at him as I fidget and the broad smile and proffered hand I receive in return only makes me smile brighter. I take his hand and it’s so warm and soft and yes, it’s really hot now. I’m burning up!

“I’m happy to have met you too, Rika.”

Oh my god, this moment is so perfect! It’s like the good ending for a VN, or close to it anyway. The moment, however, shatters as the door is practically kicked up and a shaggy-haired boy with crossed arms enters, holding the door open with just his foot.

“That has to be, by far, the slowest I’ve ever walked in my life. Seriously, you guys need to show more hustle.” He scolds as his three companions follow him in.

“But you’re always telling me to go… slower.” An auburn haired guy with a cane follows and delivers a particularly sultry comeback, pecking the cheek of the guy, who must be Suzumiya, holding the door. If that’s Hayashi then Hisao was right; he’s very much like Fuuka.

The soft metallic clicking of prosthetics follows and the dark-skinned Kapur nods to the door-holder before turning to face out the door. “Get a move on, Taro!” She calls but in a friendly way and the lumbering, large frame of Arai comes through the door; looking flush.

“Sorry, Molls.” He bows a little at the tinier girl and Suzumiya releases the door. “And butterball makes four. At least Hisao knows how to keep time.” Suzumiya says, pointing directly at us.

“Oh my god, is this the second-year cutie you’ve been talking about, Hisao!?” Kapur asks in giddy shriek that hurts my ears as she plants both hands on the table.

“C-cutie?” I stammer, looking at her, then her hands and then mine and Hisao’s still touching hands. My eyes dart to Hisao’s and he looks just about as worried as I feel.

Why do I get the sinking feeling this just turned into a triple date?
Last edited by Sharp-O on Tue Mar 01, 2016 4:34 pm, edited 2 times in total.

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Re: Flutter - Level Four: Guard Break [1/3/16]

Post by swampie2 » Tue Mar 01, 2016 6:34 am

I’m only getting so salt because senpai suck-butt here
Getting so salty?

It's the return of the characters we all know and love! Akio's still bi! Taro's still fat! Molly's... had a coffee? A new guy? Interesting. :lol:
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Re: Flutter - Level Four: Guard Break [1/3/16]

Post by Sharp-O » Tue Mar 01, 2016 8:49 am

swampie2 wrote:
I’m only getting so salt because senpai suck-butt here
Getting so salty?
being salt and being salty are kinda interchangeable terms in the fighting game community but for ease of reading, I'll change it :)
swampie2 wrote:It's the return of the characters we all know and love! Akio's still bi! Taro's still fat! Molly's... had a coffee? A new guy? Interesting. :lol:
I'm gonna have so much fun toying with those expectations, you don't even know. :lol:

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Re: Flutter - Level Four: Guard Break [1/3/16]

Post by Mirage_GSM » Tue Mar 01, 2016 10:51 am

Of course you will, and of course we don't :-)
BTW, it took me halfway through the chapter to realize you made a time skip of several weeks - which put the first half in a different perspective. You might want to make that clear a bit earlier.
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griffon8 wrote:Kosher, just because sex is your answer to everything doesn't mean that sex is the answer to everything.
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Re: Flutter - Level Four: Guard Break [1/3/16]

Post by Sharp-O » Tue Mar 01, 2016 11:00 am

I am operating on a somewhat accelerated timeline since their first real meeting doesn't occur to until Kenji receives a package and sends Hisao to fetch it so that's maybe a week or so post-festival, yes?

There's only, say, a week tops between this chapter and the last by my reckoning.

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Re: Flutter - Level Four: Guard Break [1/3/16]

Post by Mirage_GSM » Tue Mar 01, 2016 1:33 pm

Arai is… the fat guy Hisao was with a couple weeks back?
They ran into Taro just before going to the pool iIrc...
Emi > Misha > Hanako > Lilly > Rin > Shizune

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griffon8 wrote:Kosher, just because sex is your answer to everything doesn't mean that sex is the answer to everything.
Sore wa himitsu desu.

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Re: Flutter - Level Three: Hitboxes [27/2/16]

Post by Gajzla » Tue Mar 01, 2016 3:37 pm

Sharp-O wrote:
Gajzla wrote:Nice chapter once again. I was confused as well by what actually happened in the pool, but I guess thats the perils of writing while drugged. :) Hope you're feeling better.
Thanks Gaj! I'm actually not feeling any better but, at the very least, I'm getting a sense of what it's like to be Natsume day-to-day and trust me when I say that she'd be a (rightly) frustrated, cantankerous grump most of the time.

"Why can't I hold this fucking pen? It takes me 20 minutes to put on a god damn sock! Naomi, please open this bottle before I throw it at Maeda."
Blah, that sucks. Well here’s hoping the doctors can at least do something, if not you can always get addicted to painkillers, acquire a cane and become the House of KS fanfiction writers. :P
Sharp-O wrote:handsome face of his as Fuuka giggles to herself as she lays flat on my bed,
This sentence seemed a bit awkward to me, perhaps a revision to lose the second ‘as’?

Also, this.
Mirage_GSM wrote:BTW, it took me halfway through the chapter to realize you made a time skip of several weeks - which put the first half in a different perspective. You might want to make that clear a bit earlier.


Otherwise really enjoying this story. I've had an outline for a Rika fic for quite awhile and it's really interesting to see how my headcannon compares to yours. :D

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Re: Flutter - Level Four: Guard Break [1/3/16]

Post by Yukarin » Tue Mar 01, 2016 5:37 pm

I've never been salty enough in Tekken to suddenly switch to Christie to win via button mash. I found that Alisa does well against them if they mash 3 and 4. Her 1+2 does wonders and I get to full combo them after the pickup (assuming this is Tekken 6)

So i take it that this Rika likes playing fighting games? Ooh and Molly's still British!

As always, I'm eager for more.

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Re: Flutter - Level Four: Guard Break [1/3/16]

Post by Sharp-O » Tue Mar 01, 2016 5:47 pm

Gajzla wrote:Blah, that sucks. Well here’s hoping the doctors can at least do something, if not you can always get addicted to painkillers, acquire a cane and become the House of KS fanfiction writers. :P
I've been getting House cracks at work. Wouldn't it be the supreme irony if I did have lupus? Thanks for the concern, Gaj!
Gajzla wrote:Otherwise really enjoying this story. I've had an outline for a Rika fic for quite awhile and it's really interesting to see how my headcannon compares to yours. :D
That's half the fun of creating here, right? Seeing how people do characters differently.
Yukarin wrote:I've never been salty enough in Tekken to suddenly switch to Christie to win via button mash. I found that Alisa does well against them if they mash 3 and 4. Her 1+2 does wonders and I get to full combo them after the pickup (assuming this is Tekken 6)
Tekken 5, due to it having been released in 2006 :)
Yukarin wrote:So i take it that this Rika likes playing fighting games? Ooh and Molly's still British!
I think Rika likes a lot of games but Tekken and Persona are her bread and butter :D As for Molly, she will always be British when I'm writing her!

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Re: Flutter - Level Four: Guard Break [1/3/16]

Post by NotSoClassy » Wed Mar 02, 2016 9:04 pm

A Fanfic about Rika?

...


Count me in.

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