The Blank Slate - (Updated 12-26) A Christmas Council

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Mirage_GSM
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Re: Firing Blanks - One Shots

Post by Mirage_GSM » Thu Apr 30, 2015 3:14 am

Wow, this is what a one-shot should be like: Short, poignant and with an ending that both statisfies and leaves you wanting for more.
Other than some commenters I really do think that Shizune's character has evolved: she's still socially awkward but at least now she realized the reasons for it.

One minor quibble I have is that I think it's a bit unlikely that Hanako would be a christian, but that was quite subtle if it even was intentional at all...
Hope nobody minds if I go into YBC mode here, because for some reason this story is bringing that side of me out.
Yamagata Broadcasting Company?
Also, I don't think I like the idea of Hisao getting Hanako's Bad End after getting her Good End.
Huh? Where did you get that notion? The Line "I had a boyfriend" at the beginning? Her later explanation makes it quite clear that the good end didn't happen.
Actually, does it breach the 'no requests' rule if it's ideas freely exchanged in jolly cooperation? I hope not. I like the idea of mercenary fic writing.
Pretty sure it does - though I think that rule was installed to cull the excesses seen in many other forums. SC probably won't mind it very much if the results are quality wroting like this, but I can see him putting his foot down to avoid discussions on where to draw the line. So best be discreet about it to avoid cooking :-)
Emi > Misha > Hanako > Lilly > Rin > Shizune

My collected KS-Fan Fictions: Mirage's Myths
griffon8 wrote:Kosher, just because sex is your answer to everything doesn't mean that sex is the answer to everything.
Sore wa himitsu desu.

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Leaty
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Re: Firing Blanks - One Shots

Post by Leaty » Thu Apr 30, 2015 9:26 am

Mirage_GSM wrote:Pretty sure it does - though I think that rule was installed to cull the excesses seen in many other forums. SC probably won't mind it very much if the results are quality wroting like this, but I can see him putting his foot down to avoid discussions on where to draw the line. So best be discreet about it to avoid cooking :-)
The funny thing is that this prompt was one I wrote to myself. I wasn't expecting fic to just materialize into existence on the force of my imagining it.

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Gajzla
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Re: Firing Blanks - One Shots

Post by Gajzla » Thu Apr 30, 2015 11:37 am

Leaty wrote:
Mirage_GSM wrote:Pretty sure it does - though I think that rule was installed to cull the excesses seen in many other forums. SC probably won't mind it very much if the results are quality wroting like this, but I can see him putting his foot down to avoid discussions on where to draw the line. So best be discreet about it to avoid cooking :-)
The funny thing is that this prompt was one I wrote to myself. I wasn't expecting fic to just materialize into existence on the force of my imagining it.
I think theres a big difference between taking inspiration from someones throw away comment, and being directly requested to write something.

The head cannon thread would be a good place for inspiration if you’re looking.

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dewelar
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Re: Firing Blanks - One Shots

Post by dewelar » Thu Apr 30, 2015 11:45 am

Mirage_GSM wrote:
Hope nobody minds if I go into YBC mode here, because for some reason this story is bringing that side of me out.
Yamagata Broadcasting Company?
Yamaku Book Club.
Also, I don't think I like the idea of Hisao getting Hanako's Bad End after getting her Good End.
Huh? Where did you get that notion? The Line "I had a boyfriend" at the beginning? Her later explanation makes it quite clear that the good end didn't happen.
See my above explanation for this misinterpretation.
Rin is orthogonal to everything.
Stuff I've written: Developments, a continuation of Lilly's (bad? neutral?) ending - COMPLETE!

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HipsterJoe
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Re: Firing Blanks - One Shots

Post by HipsterJoe » Thu Apr 30, 2015 5:38 pm

Blank Mage wrote:In so many words? I forgot college was a thing.

Damn it, Blank, you went to college! You just forgot four years of your life, didn't you?!
Blizzard games or alcohol?

My first thought on finishing the story was that it was too short. I'm with Leaty, I want to see more of this friendship so bad now. Also, I'm super jealous of your technical skills, your prose and dialog sound so natural.
Gajzla wrote: I think theres a big difference between taking inspiration from someones throw away comment, and being directly requested to write something.

The head cannon thread would be a good place for inspiration if you’re looking.
Great minds. I was wondering if a writing prompt thread would break the no requesting rule and then realized it already existed - the head cannon thread.

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Re: Firing Blanks - One Shots

Post by Silentcook » Thu Apr 30, 2015 8:29 pm

Blank Mage wrote:Actually, does it breach the 'no requests' rule if it's ideas freely exchanged in jolly cooperation? I hope not. I like the idea of mercenary fic writing.
It does if it's done by posting on the forums (do X/needs more X/X has to become a thing - ad libitum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum). What you do in your PMs is your business.
Shattering your dreams since '94.

Image

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Blank Mage
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Re: Firing Blanks - One Shots

Post by Blank Mage » Sun May 03, 2015 9:52 pm

Ever have an idea you just wanted to write the moment it popped into your head?
And we're back.
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"I wish I could convey to you just how socially inept I am, but I can't."
"I think you just did."
"No, I really, truly haven't."

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brythain
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Re: Firing Blanks - One Shots

Post by brythain » Sun May 03, 2015 10:35 pm

Blank Mage wrote:Ever have an idea you just wanted to write the moment it popped into your head?
That's a live round, not a blank.
Post-Yamaku, what happens? After The Dream is a mosaic that follows everyone to the (sometimes) bitter end.
Main Index (Complete)Shizune/Lilly/Emi/Hanako/Rin/Misha + Miki + Natsume
Secondary Arcs: Rika/Mutou/AkiraHideaki | Others (WIP): Straw—A Dream of SuzuSakura—The Kenji Saga.
"Much has been lost, and there is much left to lose." — Tim Powers, The Drawing of the Dark (1979)

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Blank Mage
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Re: Firing Blanks - One Shots

Post by Blank Mage » Sun May 03, 2015 11:05 pm

A World Much Like Our Own

[Misha, have you ever heard of the Infinite Worlds theory?]

Misha catches the sign out of the corner of her eye, otherwise occupied trying to balance a pencil on one finger. Mutou left a few moments ago to fetch the transfer student we're getting today, and around us the classroom resumes whatever conversations they were doubtless having before class started.

[Huh? Aren't there a lot of worlds already, Shicchan?]

I give a dismissive wave. [It's not the same. Infinite Worlds theory is the idea that every possibility that can happen, does happen, in some other world. It's not somewhere you can travel to, because each one is it's own, sectioned off instance.]

She grimaces, struggling with the concept. [So, there isn't a world where anything could happen, but there's a world for every something I think of?]

I nod. [Provided it doesn't conflict with the laws of reality, I guess.]

Misha perks up, latching onto the idea enthusiastically. [Like a world where the only food is parfait!]

I give a disapproving glare. [You'd get sick of it. Anyway, I don't agree with it. I think every 'random' outcome is a result of calculable variables. Every effect has a cause, and those causes came from things before it. You can know how a coin lands if you understand perfectly the forces and counter forces at the moment you flipped it.]

Misha gives me a vacant stare before breaking into a smile. [You know I don't understand you when you use big words like that, Shicchan. But~ I think I like the idea. It means there's a world where everyone's happy!]

I only shrug. [Well, there's also one where no one is.]

Misha shoots me a glare that could only be called 'cute'. [Shicchan! You have to stop thinking so negatively! You'll make it true somewhere!] I don't think she gets it, but she does have a point, albeit accidentally. I wonder if our world only exists because someone, somewhere, imagined it into being. Ha, and what a jerk he must be, eh? Let's make an entire school of broken and/or dying kids, and see what happens. I turn my attention back to Misha, whose expression has turned melancholy in the blink of an eye.

[Is there a world where we haven't met, Shicchan?] It's a solemn thought from my chipper companion, and I can tell I'll have to act quickly to keep her from brooding on it.

[...Maybe. But I don't think so. Like I said, I think everything is a result of pre-established variables, whether we know them or not. Even our thoughts and actions. By that logic, we were always going to meet, no matter how many times you reset the scenario.]

Misha gives me a smile. [...yeah! Like our friendship is unavoidable! Like gravity, or stubbing your toe!]

[You can avoid that, Misha.]

Any further speculation is cut off as Mutou re-enters, dragging a miserable looking boy in his wake. He writes his name, 'Hisao Nakai', on the board, and Mutou launches into a lengthy speech about whatever before releasing him into the wild. Misha and I clap along with the class as he heads our way.

"You must be Mikado, right? It's nice to meet you."

I give an easy chuckle behind my fist. "It's nice to meet you, too, but my name is Shizune Hakamichi. This is Mikado."

Misha picks up on my introduction without sign, proudly placing her hands on her hips. [Tell him it's nice to meet him too~!]

I nod, and translate along as I explain to the new student. "She says it's nice to meet you. I could see why you're confused. Misha is deaf, so I'm the one who translates things back and forth to her."

Misha nods as I finish. [He's the new student, right?] I translate, and follow it up with a comment of my own. "Obviously, Misha. Unless some other transfer student was supposed to show up."

Misha gives an overacted, silent laugh. [I want there to be a world where we get a cute girl, instead~!]

I refrain from translating that last remark, switching over to sign-only. [Oh, honestly. If we all had the world we wanted, none of us would even be here in the first place.] I think for a moment. [Well, maybe you would.]

Misha just grins. [Then you would be too!] She gives a stretch of her own custom sign, her own 'laugh'.

I sigh heavily. "Sorry about that. I'm the class rep, so if there's anything you need, please ask me."

[Shicchan, Shicchan! Let's show him around after class! We might be able to get him into the Student Council!]
Last edited by Blank Mage on Mon May 04, 2015 1:13 pm, edited 2 times in total.
And we're back.
-----------
"I wish I could convey to you just how socially inept I am, but I can't."
"I think you just did."
"No, I really, truly haven't."

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brythain
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Re: Firing Blanks - One Shots

Post by brythain » Sun May 03, 2015 11:41 pm

Now that was a pretty reversal. It reminds me of the fourth Library Anniversary piece. :D
Post-Yamaku, what happens? After The Dream is a mosaic that follows everyone to the (sometimes) bitter end.
Main Index (Complete)Shizune/Lilly/Emi/Hanako/Rin/Misha + Miki + Natsume
Secondary Arcs: Rika/Mutou/AkiraHideaki | Others (WIP): Straw—A Dream of SuzuSakura—The Kenji Saga.
"Much has been lost, and there is much left to lose." — Tim Powers, The Drawing of the Dark (1979)

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Blank Mage
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Re: Firing Blanks - One Shots

Post by Blank Mage » Sun May 03, 2015 11:44 pm

brythain wrote:Now that was a pretty reversal. It reminds me of the fourth Library Anniversary piece. :D
Links where?
And we're back.
-----------
"I wish I could convey to you just how socially inept I am, but I can't."
"I think you just did."
"No, I really, truly haven't."

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brythain
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Re: Firing Blanks - One Shots

Post by brythain » Sun May 03, 2015 11:59 pm

Blank Mage wrote:
brythain wrote:Now that was a pretty reversal. It reminds me of the fourth Library Anniversary piece. :D
Links where?
We wrote four pieces. The last one contains some of that 'many worlds' business.
*Change in Management 22nd September, 2014
*The Moonlight Meeting 25th September, 2014
*Ups and Downs 29th September, 2014
*The Library: States of Meta 4th October, 2014
Post-Yamaku, what happens? After The Dream is a mosaic that follows everyone to the (sometimes) bitter end.
Main Index (Complete)Shizune/Lilly/Emi/Hanako/Rin/Misha + Miki + Natsume
Secondary Arcs: Rika/Mutou/AkiraHideaki | Others (WIP): Straw—A Dream of SuzuSakura—The Kenji Saga.
"Much has been lost, and there is much left to lose." — Tim Powers, The Drawing of the Dark (1979)

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Alpacalypse
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Re: Firing Blanks - One Shots

Post by Alpacalypse » Mon May 04, 2015 4:03 am

The ol' switcheroo...
You know I probably should have seen that coming, considering the title :roll:

Either way, that was very well executed. Nice work. :) and Mute Misha can't burst your eardrums, either :twisted:
Last edited by Alpacalypse on Mon May 04, 2015 11:03 am, edited 1 time in total.
I am the harbinger of your destruction... By herbivorous, mountain dwelling quadrupeds... fear me
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I also write now, apparently. Since everyone else does it, I'm putting it here
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I have also discovered that I'm a decent proofreader. Anybody with SPaG problems is free to PM me their work for a thorough analysis and/or evisceration. Depends on how I'm feeling.

HoneyBakedHam
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Re: Firing Blanks - One Shots

Post by HoneyBakedHam » Mon May 04, 2015 8:44 am

Aww but....no wahaha's :(

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Gajzla
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Re: Firing Blanks - One Shots

Post by Gajzla » Mon May 04, 2015 9:29 am

HoneyBakedHam wrote:Aww but....no wahaha's :(
I think she still has it, but now it’s in sign. God only knows what that looks like though. Also, loving Katawa: infinite.

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