Miki: Fragments (Complete)

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Gajzla
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Re: Miki: Fragments (Ch.14 Posted 4th May 2015)

Post by Gajzla » Wed May 06, 2015 12:02 pm

HipsterJoe wrote: I also usually hate dream sequences in stories, but because yours serve such a crucial role in feeding tidbits about the accident, that I actually look forward to the mass of italic text. I also love how unreliable they are and how different dreams contradict each other.
Yeah, I totally get what you mean, I think it depends on what the dreams are being used for, or what effect they have on the story. For my part I really enjoy writing the dream sequences, it’s nice to escape sense and the limits of reality, for at least a little while.

Thanks for the feedback.

Next update: Re-written Chapter 1 + Chapter 15 should be out Soon™.

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Re: Miki: Fragments (Ch.14 Posted 4th May 2015)

Post by Gajzla » Wed May 13, 2015 11:51 am

Hyakumonogatari Kaidankai

It’s late October and the nights have shorted plunging the green landscape around Yamaku into darkness. Good for stargazing, not so much for running. I will say it again, we need floodlights.

For lack of anything better to do I eye up the English homework that I abandoned last night; hoping the words might have morphed in to something I might be able to understand. I hate English.

Outside the wind starts to pick up, pattering rain against the glass of my window. That’s just wonderful. Giving up on the pointless homework I grab my phone, flicking it open to check the text message screen.

[No New Messages]

Blah. Ayumu is taking part in a piano exam or something. He goes strangely quiet when I try and talk to him about his music, not even letting me hear him play. I thought it might have been some kind of revenge for me not inviting him to the track meet? Who knows, that boy has his head in the clouds most of the time. If he has a complex about his piano playing, that's fine I guess. I have one about my stump.

Ryouta and Ikuno are on a date tonight, though where they would go in this weather I have no idea. I guess the cinema is a safe bet for those two. Honestly could this evening get any worse?

With a flash of lightning, like a deity taking a photograph, the lights flicker and die, plunging me into darkness.

“Fucking perfect,” I mutter, as thunder rumbles through the dormitories.

— — —

Opening my door I have to shield my eyes against the beam of a torch. “Gah!”

“Oh sorry!” The light vanishes, leaving behind a dark spot in the middle of my vision, through which I can just make out my blue haired classroom neighbour. Suzu? That sounds right.

“What's going on?” She asks, yawning slightly, apparently dressed for bed in T-shirt and sleep shorts, her leg brace has been taken off, leaving only it's imprint in her skin. She sleeps all day, how can she possibly be tired at night?

“Power cut I guess?” I say, peering down the dark corridor as doors start to open.

“Don’t they have a generator,” a disgruntled voice asks from the darkness. Sounds like Molly, another of my classmates.

“Nope,” says a male voice. “They only have that for the medical centre.”

At his words unseen girls in the corridor burst into giggles. There's nothing wrong with having a boy in the girls dormitories before curfew, but having one in your room is bound to draw the attention of those that like to gossip. Which to my understanding is everyone but me and Ikuno.

“Ryouta?” I ask, following his voice. So they opted to stay in bed instead of facing the rain.

“Good evening Miki, lovely weather for it.”

He stands next to Ikuno, who by the light of Suzu’s torch glows a delicate shade of red, her face in her hands.

“What's wrong with her?” Ryouta asks, alarmed.

“I think she might quite literally be dying form embarrassment, nice work smart arse.”

He looks between us, confused. Wait for it. Suddenly he seems to become aware of the potential rumours he’s just created. Cringing he looks as mortified as his girlfriend. Bless.

“Relax it’s not a big deal,” raising my voice slightly I continue. “Did anyone on this floor not know about these two?”

“Nope.”

“I knew”

“I live next door to them I know so much that I feel like I'm having an affair with him.”

The darkness bursts into laughter. My friends still look embarrassed, but their colour starts to return to normal. They are so cute together sometimes.

“So how did you know about the generators?” I ask, trying to change the subject.

“I knew lots of things about this school,” Ryouta shrugs, looking around. “I know something about this place hardly anyone else does.”

“Yeah?”

“Yes, sit down and I will tell you.”

We form a small clump in the middle of the hall, with my back against the wall I sit between Suzu. Barer of the only torch and hence my temporary best friend. And Ikuno, who’s watches her boyfriend with interest.

“You guys ever seen the members of the Yamaku foundation? I mean like even see portrait's of them on the walls?”

Now that he mentions it, I don’t think I have, this seems to be the general consensus.

“No, thought not, they don’t like people to know much about them. Do you ever wonder why Yamaku is in such a remote location? or why the medical centre is full of very expensive equipment despite having only a nurse on staff?”

Again most people seem to shake their heads. Where is he going with this?

“Its because since it's inception this school has been a cover for a series of top secret and, if known about controversial medical experiments.”

There is laughter, but it dies away quickly as the torch illuminates his serious face from below, making his normally rounded features sharp and angular.

“I laughed too at first, that was until I found out about Yuri Yurei.”

Ikuno sits up a little next to me, even Suzu whose head was drooping slowly towards my arm looks alert, in fact everyone seems to be listening now. I might be wrong, but I think Ryouta is enjoying a corridor of girls in their bedclothes hanging of his every word.

“Yuri was a first year when she came to Yamaku, having lost her sight in a horrible accident at her father's chemical factory the year before. Now all of us know what it's like to hate our conditions sometimes.” There are nods and small sounds of agreement. “Yuri despised her blindness, hated it with all her being. She was suffering and it was evident to every student and teacher who met her.”

He pauses, the only sound the rain pounding against the window at the end of the hall.

“Of course the school tried to help, they sent her to the therapist, but it was useless, there was just no consoling her. Until one day Yuri arrived in lessons a bright smile on her face and her eyes open and alert, no one could work out what had happened, but Yuri could see again.”

The mood seems to have changed, from giggles and laughter we are all deathly silent.

“All she would say whenever anyone even teachers asked is that the school had helped her,”

Ryouta continues. “She seemed happy and this miracle was a reason for a jubilant feeling for most, however this wasn't to last. People started to notice she was becoming more withdrawn, she refused to look people in the eye, refused even to eat lunch with her classmates. This behaviour came to a head when in the middle of class she started begging her music teacher never to drive in the rain again.”

“The teacher laughed her off, as did the rest of the class, everyone had simply assumed she had gone mad.” Pausing for dramatic effect he continues in a low voice.

“The very next day the music teacher was killed while driving in very heavy rain.”

My hand starts to tingle softly, a sure warning sign of the phantoms interest.

“Of course after that people started to talk, how had she known? For her part Yuri retreated to her room and would only talk to the school therapist and what she told him was very strange, because you see whenever Yuri Yurei looked into somebody's eyes she would see the manner of their death.”

Perfectly timed a roar of thunder rebates around us, several girls scream, including the two on each side of me. I manage to keep my cool, but this is definitely getting wired.

“That's made up, it can’t happen!” snorts Misaki, an artistic girl from my class.

“No? Consider this, during the second world war the United States, Soviet Union and even Japan studied the hidden powers of the mind, like ESP and telekinesis, it’s claimed they found nothing. But the original files have never been released to the public and no one has ever been willing to talk.”

I do remember hearing about some creepy experiments doing the war, but it can’t be real. Can it?

“It’s a well known fact we use only ten percent of our brains. When they did whatever they did to get Yuri to see again they went too far, they activated part of her brain that we all have, but can’t use.”

“So how come I've never heard of her?” Another girl pipes up from the shadows.

“Because of what happened next,” Ryouta says darkly.

“She became a recluse, not leaving her room. Even when staff tried dragging her to class she would shut her eyes and scream until they left her alone, this went on for weeks. Until one wet and windy night, very much like tonight. Dressed only in her white nightdress she climbed to the roof, and jumped to her death.”

The only sound for a moment is the howling wind.

“They never found a note, in fact all they found in her room was a broken mirror.”

“W…which room was it?” Ikuno asks beside me, the fear in her voice a little startling.

“I’ve never been able to find out, it's one on this floor though,” he looks around at his captivated audience. “You see realising the catastrophe her death would be for the school and their reputations the foundation erased all traces of Yuri Yurei, it’s as if she never existed. I hear they gave her parents a large settlement not to talk.”

There's a sharp intake of breath as another flash of lighting temporally throws our scared faces into sharp relief.

“Strangely though the story of Yuri Yurei does not end there, because you see even after her death she refuses to leave this school. Something they did here binds her to this place, sometimes on nights like this you will wake up to a gentle shuffling. Now heed my advice for you have a choice, you can either close your eyes tight, she’s not a evil spirit, simply lost, she will leave you alone.”

“Or?” I ask, surprised at the shaking in my own voice.

“You can look into her eyes, be warned though, because her reaction will tell you something about your future you might not want to know.”

Well I'm never sleeping again.

“Well goodnight girls, it's getting close to curfew.” Ryouta says cheerfully, getting to his feet.

“Wait!” Molly gasps, “Was that all true?”

He smiles simply, tapping the side of his nose with a finger before turning and walking down the corridor. He is an artist, even I almost believed him. Apparently I'm in the minority though, my hall mates gather in small groups, afraid to be alone. Babies.

Ikuno says nothing, she looks very shaken. She wasn’t in on this? I don’t know if I should be impressed or annoyed at Ryouta. I wonder how long he’s been sitting on that story.

“Emergency sleepover?” I ask her softly.

“Yes please,” she mummers. “Let me grab my night things.”

“Err,” I pause, “Do you have something other than that white nightdress?”

Outside the window wind howls and the rain pours, just as It did all those years ago.

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Last edited by Gajzla on Mon Aug 24, 2015 6:25 am, edited 4 times in total.

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Re: Miki: Fragments (Ch.14 Posted 4th May 2015)

Post by Gajzla » Wed May 13, 2015 11:54 am

So, I’m expecting a mixed reaction to this chapter. On the one hand it does very little to move the story forward, on the other it’s something i’ve wanted to write for a long time; ever since I saw the Woman in Black stage show. I also took some inspiration from D2r’s Vision, so go read his story if you haven’t already.

Chapter one has also been updated, nothing has changed plot wise, I hope you enjoy and as as always, feedback is greatly appreciated.

Next up is the last chapter of Act 0, should be out Soon™.
Last edited by Gajzla on Wed May 13, 2015 2:26 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: Miki: Fragments (Ch.14 Posted 4th May 2015)

Post by Mirage_GSM » Wed May 13, 2015 12:16 pm

He, whenever I see someone writing about a "torch" I have to forcefully remind myself that those strange Americans don't think of a burning stick of wood when they say it^^°
“It’s because since it's inspection this school has been a cover for a series of top secret and, if known about controversial medical experiments.”
"its" - and I think you meant "inception" since the other thing doesn't make a lot of sense.
Ikuno sit's up a little next to me, even Suzu who’s head was drooping
"sits" and "whose"
but this is defiantly getting wired.
"definitely"
There's a sharp intake of breathe
"breath"

Well, that didn't advance the plot much, but it was a nice read anyway :-)
Edit: Nevermind^^°
Emi > Misha > Hanako > Lilly > Rin > Shizune

My collected KS-Fan Fictions: Mirage's Myths
griffon8 wrote:Kosher, just because sex is your answer to everything doesn't mean that sex is the answer to everything.
Sore wa himitsu desu.

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Re: Miki: Fragments (Ch.1 + Ch.15 Posted 13th May 2015)

Post by Gajzla » Wed May 13, 2015 12:27 pm

Mirage_GSM wrote: He, whenever I see someone writing about a "torch" I have to forcefully remind myself that those strange Americans don't think of a burning stick of wood when they say it^^°
Out of interest, what word would you use? Flashlight seems more American than torch to me.
Mirage_GSM wrote: Well, that didn't advance the plot much, but it was a nice read anyway :-)
Well, happy you enjoyed it. Fixed all your suggestions, though I would imagine there are more to find in chapter one. My Proofreader and I alas only seem to be able catch so much.

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Re: Miki: Fragments (Ch.1 + Ch.15 Posted 13th May 2015)

Post by Mirage_GSM » Wed May 13, 2015 1:22 pm

Oops, I see you're English^^°

Yes, I'd use "flashlight" for the electrical light source. Usually I use the British term nine times out of ten, so I assumed flashlight was the British one as well. Must be because I read so much fantasy that for me the word "torch" is irrevocably connected to another item.
Emi > Misha > Hanako > Lilly > Rin > Shizune

My collected KS-Fan Fictions: Mirage's Myths
griffon8 wrote:Kosher, just because sex is your answer to everything doesn't mean that sex is the answer to everything.
Sore wa himitsu desu.

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Re: Miki: Fragments (Ch.1 + Ch.15 Posted 13th May 2015)

Post by HipsterJoe » Wed May 13, 2015 3:08 pm

I'm not going to complain about the story not advancing when the aside is that entertaining. I really enjoyed this, I feel like Yamaku would be ripe with student ghost stories.

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Re: Miki: Fragments (Ch.1 + Ch.15 Posted 13th May 2015)

Post by Gajzla » Wed May 13, 2015 3:28 pm

HipsterJoe wrote:I'm not going to complain about the story not advancing when the aside is that entertaining. I really enjoyed this, I feel like Yamaku would be ripe with student ghost stories.
Thanks for the feedback!

I have idea’s for a few more ghost stories, but they will have to wait to be one shots. Though Ryouta is a fun narrator ^^

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Re: Miki: Fragments (Ch.1 + Ch.15 Posted 13th May 2015)

Post by HipsterJoe » Wed May 13, 2015 3:35 pm

Gajzla wrote:
HipsterJoe wrote:I'm not going to complain about the story not advancing when the aside is that entertaining. I really enjoyed this, I feel like Yamaku would be ripe with student ghost stories.
Thanks for the feedback!

I have idea’s for a few more ghost stories, but they will have to wait to be one shots. Though Ryouta is a fun narrator ^^
I cannot wait for Ryouta's ghost story hour : )

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Re: Miki: Fragments (Ch.1 + Ch.15 Posted 13th May 2015)

Post by Blank Mage » Wed May 13, 2015 10:07 pm

Yuri Yurei?

Hahaaa what am I doing with my life.
And we're back.
-----------
"I wish I could convey to you just how socially inept I am, but I can't."
"I think you just did."
"No, I really, truly haven't."

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Re: Miki: Fragments (Ch.1 + Ch.15 Posted 13th May 2015)

Post by Gajzla » Thu May 14, 2015 11:36 am

HipsterJoe wrote:
Gajzla wrote:
HipsterJoe wrote:I'm not going to complain about the story not advancing when the aside is that entertaining. I really enjoyed this, I feel like Yamaku would be ripe with student ghost stories.
Thanks for the feedback!

I have idea’s for a few more ghost stories, but they will have to wait to be one shots. Though Ryouta is a fun narrator ^^
I cannot wait for Ryouta's ghost story hour : )
I should just write increasingly long winded and over dramatic ghost stories before the end of each act, to build suspense. ;P
Blank Mage wrote:Yuri Yurei?

Hahaaa what am I doing with my life.
I did wonder if anyone would pick up on the name ;)

I didn’t know that VN even existed, but now I do i’m kind of sad I don’t speak Japanese. Who doesn’t like lesbian ghosts?

Also, 100th post hype!

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Re: Miki: Fragments (Ch.1 + Ch.15 Posted 13th May 2015)

Post by Gajzla » Tue May 19, 2015 12:31 pm

So, with the drama intermission over and done with, it’s time for the last chapter of Act 0. This is by far my favourite chapter so far, both for writing and reading. I hope you enjoy, as always feedback is lovely and greatly appreciated. <3

You Were There for Summer Dreaming

Winter time has always made me sad. The life that was once so rich and full in spring has slowly died through autumn and now only the grim husk’s of trees remain. I hate having to wear big puffy coats that rustle with every step, like a lacklustre rattlesnake.

“Ouch,” I wince, taking a misstep onto my bad ankle. I hate winter. As it turns out the track gets icy in the mornings, and that in turn leads to me nearly dying of hypothermia in a cold and uncaring world. Ok a little dramatic. But still, the medical complex is a long way when you are limping.

“Did I not foresee the dangers inherit in running in these inclement conditions?” Ayumu asks as I lead him to class, using him as much as a crutch as he’s using me as guide.

“Too many big words for this early in the morning,” I mumble, wincing with every other step. I thought he could at least have given me some sympathy when I collected him this morning.

“What I mean is, I have been blind since birth and even I can see running on an icy track was a bad move,” he laughs softly.

“You’ve been spending too much time with Ryouta, you and Ikuno never used to be this cheeky,” I grumble.

“Well if you do insist on double dating with them.”

I shrug.

“Talking about dates want to do something on Saturday? We’ve not done anything in ages?” I ask hopefully.

“I think I will be studying,” he frowns, “Sorry.”

“Do you need to study so hard?” I pout, “Exams aren’t even until next year.”

He laughs softly, I gently take his elbow to stop him trampling a unsuspecting first year. Who doesn’t even look grateful I saved her, how rude.

“Yes Miki, but next year is roughly three weeks away.”

“Don’t remind me,” I groan. The time since our kiss under the dawn sun has sailed past with reckless haste. Mutou says that time can be effected by super large things like black holes, I think having a good time with the people I love makes time move faster than any interplanetary body. Then again I wasn’t really listening.

Stepping through the front doors of the main building I'm suddenly hit by a wall of warm air. Much better. Ayumu seems surprised when I turn left, instead of our normal right.

“Are you kidnapping me?” He asks curiously.

“Nope,” I say, pressing the button for the lift which arrives with a ding.

“Oh, you can’t even make it up the stairs?” For the first time he seems to take my ankle injury seriously.

“I could,” I say, selecting our floors. “But nurse says it will take three days to heal right?”

Ayumu takes a deep breath. How rude, I listen to him when I can’t even understand what he’s on about. “Right…”

“But I figure if I take the lift I can get that number down to two days, this is basically mobile bed rest.”

“Miki?”

“Yes dearest,” I tease.

“Never change,” He laughs stepping off the lift when the computerised voice announces we have reached his floor. “Oh and Miki, Seven O’clock outside the gates on Saturday, dress warm, I have a surprise for you.”

Before I can answer the doors shut in my face and I start to descend to my level. So we are going on a date after all? Hobbling along the corridor I manage to slump into my seat just as the bell rings, drawing a look somewhere between disapproval and amusement from Ikuno.

— — —

I wrap my arms around my chest shivering under a lonely street light. Pulling my woolly hat down over my ears I look around for Ayumu, I'm a little early; but this could be our last date. The thought scolds like a branding iron.

The tapping of a white cane announces my boyfriends arrival. Like me he is dressed for the cold winter night, “Miki?”

“Hi,” I say, straightening his bobbled hat.

“So where are we going?” I whisper, moving closer in the cold.

“It’s a surprise,” he smiles, “The bus is here.”

Is it?

The sound of the blue bus takes a little longer to register with me than my companion, but sure enough it rolls into view. Unlike the last time we took this route there is hardly anyone around. Settling myself into the seat beside the window I can just make out the lights of Yamaku as we drive away.

Nestled in the darkened bus we embrace in a comfortable silence. Before long the amber lights of the city start to flash by the windows, reminding me of home. I wonder how mum and dad are? I’ve come to realise how much I missed them, without even knowing it.

Back six months ago I thought I might have alienated my dad within a day of meeting him, insisting Ayumu and I shared a bed. On reflection I think he expected to find an older version of the little girl I used to be, but I’ve grown up now, I need my independence and I need to make my own mistakes. I think he understands.

As for my mother. Well. She didn’t tell me what to do one way or the other. But did hand me a box of condoms before I left, much to my embarrassment. Thanks mum. It’s like she’s been asleep for a long time, trapped in a nightmare, now she’s awake she’s happy to let life happen, because it's better than the alternative.

I’m even on reasonably good terms with the house keeper, who made me this hat. Though I don’t think it scores many points for fashion, it is unbelievably warm. I will admit I thought It was a stump cosy when I first saw it.

“I think we are here,” I speak softly as the bus hisses to a halt.

Stepping out into the pavement, dyed orange by the overhead streetlight, I pull my coat tighter around me. The air here is warmer, but the tall buildings act to whip up the biting wind into a frenzy. Despite the hour, shops and stalls continue to draw in a trickle of hardy customers.

By following my descriptions and Ayumu’s directions we drift through the city. It’s busier than I expected, shoppers throw us startled looks, before disappearing into the night. We end up joining a crowd of people amassed under a forest of dark trees, sandwiched between two busy roads. I’m a little confused.

“What's going on?” I ask, leaning close to Ayumu.

“Patience and all will be revealed.” he says maddeningly.

The air around the crowd has an excited feel to it, something is going to happen soon but I have no idea what. Suddenly somewhere a loud speaker crackles into life, a cheery female voice counting down from ten. Fireworks?

“Three.”

“Two,” I look to Ayumu who is smiling knowingly.

“One.”

The world around me explodes into light. Every branch on every tree is covered with glistening strings of lights, seemingly to go on forever. The crowd around me roars in delight as I cover my mouth with my hand. It's beautiful.

“Oh wow…” I mummer, spinning slowly around to catch every mesmerising detail, on the roads cars sound their horns appreciatively.

“Like it?” He asks, a smile clear on his face.

“I love it.”

I feel like a child again as I grab his hand, almost skipping along the avenue. It's as if someone has stolen the stars from the night sky and tied them to the trees. Trying to describe the lights proves to be almost impossible, every time I start the words die in my throat. It’s impossible to translate what I'm feeling.

“I’m sorry,” I apologise sadly, he should be able to experience this too.

“Sorry?” He says, a soft smile on his face. “This is somewhere so beautiful that you can’t find the words to describe it, that's what I wanted you to see.”

He takes my stump softly, I shiver, I’ve never let him touch me there before. Gently, with the care of a dancer he turns me towards him.

“This is how the world is for me every day, so beautiful that I can’t find the words no matter how hard I try,” he chuckles. “People feel sorry for the blind for what we can’t see, I think I see something far more beautiful than they ever will, I can see you.”

My lips touch his, I can’t talk. I can’t even think. I just want this moment to last forever, a perfect world under the captured starlight.

“I’m going to miss you so much,” I whisper into his lips, tears streaming down my face.

“I will too, so much, but alas If I could capture a moment and hold it forever I would, for the pain of tomorrow is too unbearable to face”

His lips find mine again.

“But we have to face it,” tears glisten on his face. “We have to because we are but dust motes caught in the breeze, hoping to collide for an infinitesimal moment of happiness in the void.”

My kisses interrupt his speech. So many meaningless words. Nothing will be the same, not after he leaves. All I will have are memories, I think we both know we’re not going to talk again, how can words replace this? People swarm around us, but we stay in an immobile embrace.

“Ayumu?”

“Yeah?”

I love you.

“…Thank you for bringing me here” I recover quickly, It’s not want I wanted to say. Those words would do no one any good. The truth is selfish.

Together we walk amongst the lights, wandering through the adjacent park with displays of lights just as beautiful. I notice other happy pairs around us, and I feel small, we are just two more broken specks lost in the void.

———

The end comes faster than I could have ever imagined. Filing into the graduation ceremony I feel like my stomach is full of snakes, squirming and biting, their venom flowing into my hand where it burns intensely. The atmosphere is so happy; yet I feel like I’m watching Ayumu being marched to his execution.

We sing to the flag and I clap along with everyone else, though for me it's more a token mime than sound of approval. Secretly I just want this over. Trying to distract myself I glance at the parents who watch three years of their broken child’s hard work, and their own considerable financial expense pay off, some of them must have doubted they would ever see this.

Name’s I’ve never heard of are called, I watch half-heartedly as certificates are collected and bows are made. It’s remarkable how similar this is to graduation at my old school, despite peoples differences the same unknown world awaits.

“Akiyama, Ayumu.” His name rings through the hall, it feels like a hushed silence should fall. Don’t they understand how big a deal this is?

A head of beautiful black hair rises above the seated crowd, his arm is taken by Miss Mizushima, my maths teacher. I could have done that if someone asked. She leads him impersonally to the stage.

Standing before the principal, I can see a smile on his face. Having gotten the grades he wanted he is all set to study literature at university. Briefly I entertain a fantasy that he’s told there's been a mistake, that he will have to spend another year at school. With me.

He takes his scroll and bows to the principle before turning and bowing to us all. I clap as hard as I can, smacking my leg with my good hand, hoping that somehow he can hear me above the din. Walking away from the stage his part in this performance played, he looks relived, I wish I could leave.

I listen to the speeches by one of the second year students, wishing our schoolmates good luck in their future. Followed by a third year from the track team, who talks about how we need to work hard next year. Don’t these people realise that school means nothing with no beautiful black haired dreamer?

Their words flow through my mind, becoming instantly lost. I fidget in my seat, trying to find where Ayumu went, I want to be able to find him as soon as this is over. I need to make the most of our last moments. Today he will leave, and tomorrow I will be expected to carry on.

With a final round of applause the graduation ceremony comes to an end.

Practically having to fight my way through the crowd I find Ayumu on the sideline, talking to a women with raven black hair the same colour as his, his mother. Suddenly I feel a weight in my stomach, she doesn’t approve of me. What if she stops me saying good bye? Approaching slowly I don’t know if I should interrupt.

Noticing me she turns. “So you must be Miki, the girl who’s been stealing my son away from me.”

“I, didn’t…” Well in the end life is stealing him from me.

Her face lights with a smile, much like her sons. “Forgive my jest, I will allow you two some space.”

She even talks like him.

As soon as she is a reasonable distance away I fall into him, hugging tightly. His hands find my soft hair, I wanted to look perfect for him, stroking it softly he smiles.

“So I guess this is it,” he says gently.

“I guess.” I sound like a fool, but I don’t know what else to say.

“Will you do something for me?”

I nod into his chest.

“Don’t let anything hold you back and find love, find it and never let it go.”

I love you.

“I… okay.”

“Goodbye Miki,” he pulls away and I notice tears stain his beautiful face.

“Goodbye,” I mumble, barely audible. Pulling away is agonising, why can’t I just grab on and refuse to let go? Before I can act on this crazy impulse he is slowly unfolding his cane. With a last nod of his head he walks out of my life.

I should have told him. I should stop him! told him that goodbye wasn’t enough, that no goodbye ever will be. It just seemed to happen so fast, I want to run after him, tell him that he can’t leave me like this, tell him it hurts to much, more than losing my hand. I sink down against the wall, pressing my face into my knees I sob. People will be watching, wondering, but I don’t care. Let them watch.

Someone puts their hand on my shaking shoulder, I look up into the ocean blue eyes of my best friend, her bottom lip shakes, without warning she pulls me into a tight hug, holding me close on the dusty hall floor.

— — —

“I’m going to bed.” I say, getting up from the sofa. Nothing on the television has been able to grab my attention since I've been home, even running has lost some of its appeal. Nothing has been able to compare to him.

“Okay Sweet, sleep well,” dad says, smiling softly at me his arm wrapped around mum. I’ve not told them about graduation, but I think they know.

I dress in the darkness of my room, before slipping into bed. I toss and turn trying to find a comfortable position, I’ve not been sleeping well. My dreams have been twisting and warping inside my head, playing out in new and disturbing patterns. The phantom never one to be left out feeds on my anger and sadness like a leech, attacking my non-existent hand with a new found malice.

To top it all off dad is becoming frailer with each day, bone thin and gaunt he seems to spend all of his time either asleep or absently staring at the television. Infuriatingly he insists he’s fine, refusing to go to a doctor or even talk about how he’s feeling. I don’t want him to go, I’ve only just got him back.

For the first time in a long time I reach under my bed, pulling out a well hidden bottle of whisky. I promised I would never do this again. Gripping the cold bottle between my knees I pull out the stopper, the amber liquid burns through my throat, both a punishment and a relief. Just one sip, one sip to help me forget and sleep.

The silver moon reflecting off a half empty bottle is the last thing I can remember before sleep takes me.



“Look it’s simple, I need to do some business.” Tatsuo sounds irritated as he pulls the truck up against the curb. “You sit here, make sure no one interferes with the truck, I mean you can drive right?”

“Sure, it's not a problem.” I don’t want him to think I'm some kid, even though I've never driven a car in my life. We swap seats. It’s not like I'm really going to have to drive it though, he would never let me, probably it’s some stupid parking rule. Like you have to be sat in the driver's seat otherwise you get a ticket.

I roll down the window when he taps on the glass.

“Just stay here and wait okay?”

Before I can answer he turns, walking away up the street. He seems a lot colder than he was just a few minutes ago, have I done something wrong?

I rest my chin on the wheel, it vibrates softly with the running engine, he’s been a long time. Or at least it feels like he’s been a long time. Suddenly the passenger door flies open as Tatsuo jumps inside, a terrorised look on his face.

“Go! Go!” He shouts, turning in his seat to stare out of the back window.

“What?” I ask, shocked. Copying his motion I can see a group of men running towards us, one of them wilds a baseball bat. I feel the truck jerk as Tatsuo pushes the leave to put it into drive.

“Go!” He shouts, real fear in his voice.

Panicking I step on the pedal. The truck roars flying forward, my eyes bulge as I realise I have no control, steering wildly the tyres start to squeal. Oh god how do I make it slow down?

“What are you doing!” He grabs my arm trying to control. “Brake! Brake.”

It’s too late, with a sound like a cannon we hit a parked car. There is a long moment of eerie silence, as almost in slow motion I feel my body become weightless.

Then we hit the ground hard, before being thrown back into the air, I can’t tell which way is up as I'm thrown around inside the spinning truck. The last thing I see is solid black pavement rushing up to meet my outstretched hand.

Blackness envelops me.


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Last edited by Gajzla on Mon Aug 24, 2015 6:28 am, edited 5 times in total.

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Mirage_GSM
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Re: Miki: Fragments (Ch.16 Posted 19th May 2015)

Post by Mirage_GSM » Tue May 19, 2015 4:42 pm

We sing to the flag
Do they do that in Japan?
Standing before the principle,
the principal
Infuriatingly he instants he’s fine,
He insists, probably?

The other problem: Apostrophes - too many in some places, too few in others.

So in this chapter what you forshadowed for some time finally happened - though if the end is supposed to be a reveal or yet another misdirection, time will have to tell...
Emi > Misha > Hanako > Lilly > Rin > Shizune

My collected KS-Fan Fictions: Mirage's Myths
griffon8 wrote:Kosher, just because sex is your answer to everything doesn't mean that sex is the answer to everything.
Sore wa himitsu desu.

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Gajzla
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Re: Miki: Fragments (Ch.16 Posted 19th May 2015)

Post by Gajzla » Tue May 19, 2015 6:09 pm

Mirage_GSM wrote:Do they do that in Japan?
I believe so, heres my source.
Mirage_GSM wrote:The other problem: Apostrophes - too many in some places, too few in others.
Apostrophes are my arch rival, I will try my best to deal with them in future. I’ve fixed what you pointed out, thanks for doing that. Fancy being a proofreader? :lol:
Mirage_GSM wrote:So in this chapter what you forshadowed for some time finally happened - though if the end is supposed to be a reveal or yet another misdirection, time will have to tell...
All will be revealed in the next chapter* of Miki: Fragments! Coming Soon™.

*This is about the half way point in the story, so… perhaps not the very next chapter.

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HipsterJoe
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Re: Miki: Fragments (Ch.16 Posted 19th May 2015)

Post by HipsterJoe » Tue May 19, 2015 8:45 pm

Gajzia wrote:I notice other happy pairs around us, and I feel small, we are just two more broken specs lost in the void.
Pretty sure you mean specks. I only point it out cause I became amused imagining Miki/Ayumu as a broken pair of eyeglasses drifting through space surrounded by happy glasses.

I liked this chapter. The goodbye scene is incredibly tragic, especially since she never told him she loved him. Having been in the exact same situation in college, the goodbye scene rang uncomfortably true. There really is no easy way to say, "It was nice loving you, have a good life." I do feel like even though Ayumu was very clear about ending the relationship, it's a little surprising that they wouldn't communicate again. I feel like we just jumped over a huge block of time and could of benefited from spending a bit more time leading up to the inevitable. I would have liked to see more of their relationship as it steamed towards its inevitable conclusion, but I like dwelling on the tragic. If there is one thing I can count on, it is that this story will always be moving forward.
Gajzla wrote:All will be revealed in the next chapter* of Miki: Fragments! Coming Soon™.
I'm really liking the dream reveals of the accident. I'm a huge fan of unreliable narrators and the dreams are such a cool way to present the accident as a mystery without resorting to cheap writing methods. Eagerly to see where this story goes next!

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