Has anybody here played this while having a RL girlfriend?

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Did you have a girlfriend at the time of playing KS?

Yes, I had a girlfriend in RL while playing KS
27
41%
No, I did not have a girlfriend in RL while playing KS
39
59%
 
Total votes: 66

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SpunkySix
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Re: Has anybody here played this while having a RL girlfrien

Post by SpunkySix » Fri Feb 07, 2014 8:12 am

Potato wrote:
SpunkySix wrote:This is the stuff that keeps me up at night thinking. Right here. I really don't get it.
If "What if this animated video game character got pregnant?" keeps you up at night... :lol:
Well... not REALLY the idea, but okay.

And I guess it's context sensitive then? I just feel like I'd want to wait longer. Being horny is one thing, but self restraint is a virtue.
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metalangel
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Re: Has anybody here played this while having a RL girlfrien

Post by metalangel » Fri Feb 07, 2014 12:02 pm

SpunkySix wrote:
Really, at 18//19? Even later, that would feel weird for me. Don't you want to know a person better than that before you do it? Or do girls expect that sort of thing? I thought that's exactly what they don't want most of the time. Besides, it's implied they weren't even protected the first time, what if Emi got pregnant? Ugh...

This is the stuff that keeps me up at night thinking. Right here. I really don't get it.
And I guess it's context sensitive then? I just feel like I'd want to wait longer. Being horny is one thing, but self restraint is a virtue.
I find your naivete somewhat endearing. How old are you, if you don't mind answering?
 
Do you want to know a person better before you do it? Not necessarily. For one thing, you're attaching way too much emotional importance to sex. It is a natural biological thing that humans are programmed to want to do. Personally, I think sex and emotions can (and sometimes should) be kept separate. You can really like someone and not want to have sex with them, and you can really want to have sex with someone but not want anything further than that. If you meet someone and there's a mutual attraction and desire then why wouldn't you go for it? Why would you wait? The moment is right there, right now. It might be a one night stand, it might be friends with benefits, it might be the person you end up spending the rest of your life with.
 
This is why I worry about very young or inexperienced people seeing KS as a guide of sorts to romance: they're going to develop certain expectations on top of whatever they already have. Personal experience is far, far more important (and fun).
 
What if she got pregnant? And? That's why the morning after pill exists. That is why coitus interruptus exists. No contraception is 100% effective. You need to talk to your partner and agree about how you want to be safe with them. The same agreement will not apply for any other partners, you'll need to make a different one with them, for both pregnancy (if applicable) and STDs.
 
Self restraint being a virtue is debatable. This goes back to the whole building up sex into this huge event. Doing so can be unhealthy because your expectations are too high, IMHO. There is no 'perfect' moment, apart from when you are both in the mood and willing, because at the end of the day that's all you need. A slight cautionary note: I've heard of guys who had a girl come on to them, and they turned her down wanting to give the impression of not being just after her for that (you know, the whole nice guy routine) only to find the girl took this as a total rejection and lost all interest in them. In other words: I've had girls tell me they were glad we waited, but when they'd finally wanted to take it to that next level I went along with it. You're only doing a disservice to yourself thinking it's "weird".

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Re: Has anybody here played this while having a RL girlfrien

Post by Guest Poster » Fri Feb 07, 2014 12:27 pm

Do you want to know a person better before you do it? Not necessarily. For one thing, you're attaching way too much emotional importance to sex. It is a natural biological thing that humans are programmed to want to do. Personally, I think sex and emotions can (and sometimes should) be kept separate. You can really like someone and not want to have sex with them, and you can really want to have sex with someone but not want anything further than that. If you meet someone and there's a mutual attraction and desire then why wouldn't you go for it? Why would you wait? The moment is right there, right now. It might be a one night stand, it might be friends with benefits, it might be the person you end up spending the rest of your life with.
I think the most important part is knowing what both you and the other want out of sex. Plenty of people, myself included, don't care for one night stands or friends with benefits, but wouldn't want to go with the whole abstinence-until-marriage either. Make sure yours and the other person are on the same wavelength or one of you is probably going to regret it. Otherwise, do it when you both feel ready for it.
What if she got pregnant? And? That's why the morning after pill exists. That is why coitus interruptus exists. No contraception is 100% effective.
Maybe not, but using a condom or going double dutch is still one hell of a lot better than lame stuff like the morning after pill (nothing kills the mood like a girlfriend who's nauseous due to having taken the plan B pill after sex when she could be falling asleep in your arms) or risky stuff like Coitus Interruptus.
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metalangel
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Re: Has anybody here played this while having a RL girlfrien

Post by metalangel » Fri Feb 07, 2014 1:22 pm

Guest Poster wrote:
I think the most important part is knowing what both you and the other want out of sex. Plenty of people, myself included, don't care for one night stands or friends with benefits, but wouldn't want to go with the whole abstinence-until-marriage either. Make sure yours and the other person are on the same wavelength or one of you is probably going to regret it. Otherwise, do it when you both feel ready for it.
That's what I said, just phrased differently.
Maybe not, but using a condom or going double dutch is still one hell of a lot better than lame stuff like the morning after pill (nothing kills the mood like a girlfriend who's nauseous due to having taken the plan B pill after sex when she could be falling asleep in your arms) or risky stuff like Coitus Interruptus.
 
Okay, can we nip the whole sexual health/contraception thing in the bud here before it derails this already silly thread any further?
 
The reason the Pill, IUDs, implants and so many other forms exist is so you aren't (apparently) keeping the Morning After Pill next to your freaking bed so you can pop it immediately after having sex if you're worried you've had an accident (as per your example). It's intended for emergencies, an unexpected clinch or moment of passion, sort of like Emi and Hisao's first time, which just kind of happened as these things sometimes do. Coitus Interruptus is risky but again, sometimes as needs must - it's not a long term solution by any means. Sex is meant to be fun, if you're absolutely petrified of something happening then you'll successfully kill the mood if applying half a dozen forms of contraception to each other first already hasn't.

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SpunkySix
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Re: Has anybody here played this while having a RL girlfrien

Post by SpunkySix » Fri Feb 07, 2014 2:04 pm

I'm 19, and I guess I still have a lot to learn. My parents both waited until marriage and I've always been taught that just going for sex was morally wrong, not even from them necessarily, but just in general. I've thought about this critically, of course, but without any experience, it's hard to know for sure what's right. I'll have to think on all this.
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metalangel
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Re: Has anybody here played this while having a RL girlfrien

Post by metalangel » Fri Feb 07, 2014 2:21 pm

You need to make your own decisions about what's right or wrong - I think teaching people that sex is somehow immoral or dirty is reprehensible, because I believe your views should only affect your life and not negatively affect others. I'm glad you've been encouraged to think about it critically. I'd also encourage you to go out and experience love and romance for yourself - you're only young once and you don't want to hit 30 and be kicking yourself for discovering them late.

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Re: Has anybody here played this while having a RL girlfrien

Post by Atario » Fri Feb 07, 2014 9:08 pm

Guest Poster wrote:going double dutch
First time I've heard this term used this way. Before I googled for it, I was picturing having sex while doing fancy jumprope techniques.

Something tells me Emi would be the master of that.
NB: none of the above is a request

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Re: Has anybody here played this while having a RL girlfrien

Post by pandaphil » Fri Feb 07, 2014 9:32 pm

Metalangel is right. Sex is perfectly natural, and its shameful to try and teach children thats its wrong. I've got no problem with advising teens to wait until their more mature, but at the same time, they need to be taught about the dangers of pregnancy and STD's, and how birth control works. Just to be safe.

As for the girlfriend thing, I've never had one, but I like to think reading KS would make me want to go cuddle and tell them how much I loved them.
"The way I see it, every life is a pile of good things and bad things. The good things don't always soften the bad things. But vice versa, the bad things don't necessarily spoil the good things or make them unimportant." ~ The Doctor.

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Re: Has anybody here played this while having a RL girlfrien

Post by SpunkySix » Fri Feb 07, 2014 9:44 pm

Atario wrote:
Guest Poster wrote:going double dutch
First time I've heard this term used this way. Before I googled for it, I was picturing having sex while doing fancy jumprope techniques.

Something tells me Emi would be the master of that.
She'd try it and then immediately regret it in the most comical way possible.
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Kyler Thatch
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Re: Has anybody here played this while having a RL girlfrien

Post by Kyler Thatch » Fri Feb 07, 2014 10:47 pm

pandaphil wrote:Metalangel is right. Sex is perfectly natural, and its shameful to try and teach children thats its wrong. I've got no problem with advising teens to wait until their more mature, but at the same time, they need to be taught about the dangers of pregnancy and STD's, and how birth control works. Just to be safe.
That's the mechanical part of sex covered, but equally important in my opinion is to discuss the social aspects. Consent, peer pressure, stuff like that.

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Re: Has anybody here played this while having a RL girlfrien

Post by pandaphil » Fri Feb 07, 2014 11:37 pm

Kyler Thatch wrote:
pandaphil wrote:Metalangel is right. Sex is perfectly natural, and its shameful to try and teach children thats its wrong. I've got no problem with advising teens to wait until their more mature, but at the same time, they need to be taught about the dangers of pregnancy and STD's, and how birth control works. Just to be safe.
That's the mechanical part of sex covered, but equally important in my opinion is to discuss the social aspects. Consent, peer pressure, stuff like that.

True enough. But that needs to be part of Life Lessons 101. Covering everything from sex, to drinking, to smoking weeds, etc.
"The way I see it, every life is a pile of good things and bad things. The good things don't always soften the bad things. But vice versa, the bad things don't necessarily spoil the good things or make them unimportant." ~ The Doctor.

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metalangel
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Re: Has anybody here played this while having a RL girlfrien

Post by metalangel » Sat Feb 08, 2014 12:08 am

pandaphil wrote:
True enough. But that needs to be part of Life Lessons 101. Covering everything from sex, to drinking, to smoking weeds, etc.
I agree. This is still veering off topic, it is not the purpose of KS nor this forum to provide education to the young on life itself.

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icannotfindausername
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Re: Has anybody here played this while having a RL girlfrien

Post by icannotfindausername » Sun Feb 09, 2014 12:54 pm

Back onto topic !

Yes I did play this while in a relationship, to say the least my girlfriend couldn't care any less.
Although I had no conflicting feelings whatsoever I did question the validity or "realism" of the feelings towards the game characters but in the end of the day KS had no direct negative influence to my behavior, although I was very much lazier than usual and much more... how to word this... "cuddly-er" as Lilly's and Hanako's routes left feeling very soft and tender-hearted.

A rather positive influence if anything really, I'd go as far as saying KS helped improve my relationship as I came to learn from Hisao's mistakes to listen more and not to pressure those close to you on topics they're not comfortable discussing. :D
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Re: Has anybody here played this while having a RL girlfrien

Post by OutofBlues » Sun Feb 09, 2014 10:35 pm

I played Katawa Shoujo while in a long term relationship. The GF noticed I was playing a different video game than normal, and then noticed my rather sudden change in mood once the "Post-KS Blues" kicked in. She had a good laugh at my expense when I told her it was caused by a "video game", but she didn't push the matter farther. She has started getting more curious lately as I've been diving into the fanfic world thanks to the writers here, and I have started(and finished!) a few other VN's, however I don't really think the concept of KS would hold any interest for her. I should find her something supernatural with a female lead. She loves those Tanith Lee books something fierce.

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Re: Has anybody here played this while having a RL girlfrien

Post by SpunkySix » Mon Feb 10, 2014 12:01 am

OutofBlues wrote:I played Katawa Shoujo while in a long term relationship. The GF noticed I was playing a different video game than normal, and then noticed my rather sudden change in mood once the "Post-KS Blues" kicked in. She had a good laugh at my expense when I told her it was caused by a "video game", but she didn't push the matter farther. She has started getting more curious lately as I've been diving into the fanfic world thanks to the writers here, and I have started(and finished!) a few other VN's, however I don't really think the concept of KS would hold any interest for her. I should find her something supernatural with a female lead. She loves those Tanith Lee books something fierce.
There's a short one about magical Seeds on Newgrounds that she might like, if she's interested.

And one about a girl who makes cats for cookies called Ripples, but that's neither here nor there.
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