The "feels" bazaar.

[Xanatos]

I see Xan's plan to empty out the forum continues right on schedule. Nice going.

Not my fault the guy gets upset by being informed that his topic is redundant. Please tell me more about this plan of yours.

[PyroOgre]

I guess I'll add in my two cents. I'm currently doing a second playthrough, did my first go-through over a year ago. Wanting to replay Emi's and Lilly's routes again for the feels got me going.

Perhaps I'm strange, but I didn't feel much playing Hanako's route the first time through. I did hers right after Lilly's though, and with the way she ended up there, I figured that had something to do with it. So on playthrough two I did her first. Needless to say, the order I played the routes had an effect, since this time her story, especially the good end, hit me like a ton of bricks, as did Emi's; knowing what was coming made it hurt.

A week later, and i don't think I can do a second playthrough of Lilly's route. I've gotten more feels this time through than I did a year ago, and if Emi and Hanako did that much, than Lilly might completely break me. (I love Rin's route but it didn't affect me much the first time through. Like Hanako, maybe the second time will crush me instead). My heart knows not what to do.

[Xanatos]

I guess I'll add in my two cents. I'm currently doing a second playthrough, did my first go-through over a year ago. Wanting to replay Emi's and Lilly's routes again for the feels got me going.

Perhaps I'm strange, but I didn't feel much playing Hanako's route the first time through. I did hers right after Lilly's though, and with the way she ended up there, I figured that had something to do with it. So on playthrough two I did her first. Needless to say, the order I played the routes had an effect, since this time her story, especially the good end, hit me like a ton of bricks, as did Emi's; knowing what was coming made it hurt.

A week later, and i don't think I can do a second playthrough of Lilly's route. I've gotten more feels this time through than I did a year ago, and if Emi and Hanako did that much, than Lilly might completely break me. (I love Rin's route but it didn't affect me much the first time through. Like Hanako, maybe the second time will crush me instead). My heart knows not what to do.

Punch your heart in the dick and replay Rin's route.

[KeiichiO]

I guess I'll add in my two cents. I'm currently doing a second playthrough, did my first go-through over a year ago. Wanting to replay Emi's and Lilly's routes again for the feels got me going.

Perhaps I'm strange, but I didn't feel much playing Hanako's route the first time through. I did hers right after Lilly's though, and with the way she ended up there, I figured that had something to do with it. So on playthrough two I did her first. Needless to say, the order I played the routes had an effect, since this time her story, especially the good end, hit me like a ton of bricks, as did Emi's; knowing what was coming made it hurt.

A week later, and i don't think I can do a second playthrough of Lilly's route. I've gotten more feels this time through than I did a year ago, and if Emi and Hanako did that much, than Lilly might completely break me. (I love Rin's route but it didn't affect me much the first time through. Like Hanako, maybe the second time will crush me instead). My heart knows not what to do.

Punch your heart in the dick and replay Rin's route.

I'm not sure what that even means, but I agree.

[PyroOgre]

I guess I'll add in my two cents. I'm currently doing a second playthrough, did my first go-through over a year ago. Wanting to replay Emi's and Lilly's routes again for the feels got me going.

Perhaps I'm strange, but I didn't feel much playing Hanako's route the first time through. I did hers right after Lilly's though, and with the way she ended up there, I figured that had something to do with it. So on playthrough two I did her first. Needless to say, the order I played the routes had an effect, since this time her story, especially the good end, hit me like a ton of bricks, as did Emi's; knowing what was coming made it hurt.

A week later, and i don't think I can do a second playthrough of Lilly's route. I've gotten more feels this time through than I did a year ago, and if Emi and Hanako did that much, than Lilly might completely break me. (I love Rin's route but it didn't affect me much the first time through. Like Hanako, maybe the second time will crush me instead). My heart knows not what to do.

Punch your heart in the dick and replay Rin's route.

I'm not sure what that even means, but I agree.

Agh, now my heart-dick hurts from the punch >_<
But I am replaying since since it was next on the list anyway. Going through it the second time feels way easier, like I can understand her with little difficulty.

[Veloz]

First of all, i apologize if anyone is offended for whatever i write here, or bothered by my post or if it is outta place. As you can see this is my first post, couldd't help it anymore and it's past 3 am so whatever :p

I started with KS few days ago, after weeks of watching the god damn thread on 4chan. I had obviously no idea of what it was about with all the Feels/circlejerk thing lol. Ended up going to the Emi's route (my first reaction to her was "lol she's weird, but cute tho). Imagine dem feels when I stopped it right after the love confession on the roof scene and started crying. Why? Well... Emi heavily resembles to my ex in several things and her route (till the part i played) also resembles quite a lot how things started for us. Now i hate her because she cheated on me, broke my heart and literally stoped my life. This was 2 1/2 months ago. I paused university in part because of that, and i'm starting a job in october for about 6 months, till she is done with the university and i can get back to it without having to watch at her fucking eyes every single day. I've been since mid august locked in my room.

I started hating Emi because of that resemblance... but then I hated myself because of the fact that even in a "game" in which i had no idea of the consequences of my decisions, i would lead myself to end up with "her" again. Fucking depressive, ladies and gentlemen. It's even worse when i know that somewhere in my heart i would still do anything to be with her. Fml.

On the other side the first time i saw Lilly the whole thing kinda haunted me. I loved the music track (i like classic music, the track was somehow cute too), i loved her attitude, i loved that she is a tea drinker like me and i loved the irony of someone blind guiding you to a place. It was perfect. And i figured that would be some sort of story i'd like to follow, and perhaps also the kind of ideal girl for me irl. Thing is there doesn't seem to be any girl like that. Not at least in my place. Hell, even tea drinkers are pretty rare here.

Anyway, looked up for a guide and im currently on her route. it's great so far, chess player, friend of the shy girl of the school, reads a lot... wow so many things in common... and there with that revelation came another wave of feels: Yes, Lily is awesome, is like a mirror of me irl, male version, and obviously not japanese/scottish or blind whatsoever.

But again, what bugs me is that following purely my instintcs i ended up with Emi, the runner. WHY? I loved to run, and every sunday i went to run with my ex, and we enjoyed it, and after that she'd come and stay in my house the whole day, we would shower together, eat really delicous and healthy meals, watch a movie or do homework or sleep or have sexy time... anything. We loved to listen music, we loved our little pillow fights or tickle wars... again that was so Emi. she was so expressive, she'd convince me of anything using a cute face. And it changed me. I don´t want to run anymore, i don't feel like i will enjoy it anymore. I'm scared of it. I will change the songs we used to listen together, i had even developed some sort of hate for some songs... that i used to like or that introduced to her. I wont play my guitar, even tho i loved it, just because it brings so many memories and special moments in which i singed for her. I wont buy her favorite "tea" (also introduced her to that) even tho it was also one of my favorites.

My previous girlfriends were very different, and despite the fact we were together i never thought of having a life with them. With her it was different. for the first time on my life i felt like i had a plan for life, something worth considering long term. I truly loved her. But she had to ruin it all, and then her pride led her to hate me. Im starting to wonder if i'll end up with someone like her (hence Emi-ish) again. I don't want to. Even tho i like it... i might love it... but i just dont want to do the things i did with her again, because i think it will hurt, i will fail or simply it just wont be as good as it was when i did it because i genuinelly wanted to. I'm a rather smart guy, over the average, according to every evidence ive had the chance to get my hands or senses on. I know this is extremely idiotic, but I can't help feeling that way. I'm a human as well.

So hi, im another one like you who messed with KS and ended up getting a jab in the feeler.

Guess I'´ll stick to lily's route and then check the others later. Not sure about emi tho... it kinda sucks for me Btw reading it on french. I'm not a native english speaker, as you probably noticed for the possible mistakes in this text wall, sorry about them. But I wanted to practice my french as well. It was her favorite language, whilst mine remains english. it would be great to eventually make our common contacts tell her that i'm great at french, perhaps even better than her. I bet that would seriously get under her skin hehe.

Hi everyone and it's a pleasure to share with other people my story, perhaps is not different from many others out there. Hope everything is going better for you guys & gals. Time to bed. 3:42 am already. Well i'm slow lol.

[Xanatos]

Three issues.

1. Rin's route: I played the game completely blind at first, and ended up on Rin's route (I disliked her at first; if I were to choose a route based solely on my first Act 1 play, I would have chosen Emi). I got more involved in the story, though, and liked Rin much more. Unfortunately, when I reached the Act 3 choice ("Then explain" vs. "I need to understand"), I initially chose "I need to understand" - but after a few minutes of Act 4, decided I must have picked the wrong choice, so I went back and changed it to "Then explain." Bad move. That'll teach me to cheat in the future. I finished Rin's route that night (August 25, IIRC) and it didn't really hit me until I was done - but afterward it felt fake, as though I had really lost the game. I still haven't quite recovered from that; I don't think I've ever been as emotionally invested in a work of fiction as I was with Rin's, so I feel like I've squandered a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to succeed, to win. Maybe I'm being too competitive here? Does anyone else feel like that?

2. Playing KS changed me in an odd way. I'm a fiction writer, and before playing KS I had written a lot of technically decent, complex, well-stylized - but unemotional - stories. I only realized this after I finished Rin's route - that in my fiction writing I had never achieved the goal that I set out to, that is, to communicate or express or transfer my own inner life, emotional and otherwise. After reading something seriously moving, everything I had written seemed shallow by comparison. (Actually, this revelation had nothing to do with Rin's similar problem; I only made the connection afterward.) Anyone have similar problems?

3. KS also made me somewhat nostalgic - reluctant of time wasted. I'm fifteen, and from about August to December of 2012 I effectively dropped out of school due to severe anxiety. (I'm still not in school, but not because of anxiety: I'm a full-time researcher now.) I felt reluctant of the months I had spent in almost complete isolation, and also of missed opportunities, failed projects, lost contacts, etc. - especially after Shizune's route, which focuses around a similar problem.

Plenty have shown up here with these same issues. I'm sure we've all had those problems at some point.

[Xanatos]

How to deal with them, then? (Particularly the first and second; I've seen people talking about stuff similar to my third issue, but not to my first and second.)

incidentally, I thought of a good analogy for the game - in exercise you damage your body directly so that when it rebuilds it will be hardier. Likewise, KS damages your psychology, with the hope that when the dust clears and you recover, you will be mentally stronger. The process is fairly excruciating, though - which is why support threads for feels are so common.

Well, most people aren't writers so the issue becomes that everything they read becomes garbage by comparison. Me, I only read good authors, so I haven't had to deal with that. My solution to you is keep writing until you're better.

As for #1, that's why some won't even touch the bad ends. They're too invested. Only fix is to remember it's just a story.

[Xanatos]

Yeah, that's been my feels defense mechanism for some time now. For some reason, though, it doesn't work with KS. Maybe it's because I tend to look at interactive fiction as games, to be won or lost, and in this case I lost - and the loss combined with the content of the story is what makes it so devastating - if you follow me.

Yeah, I get it...I recently crashed pretty hard back into the feels and I haven't even started replaying the game...It's a curse disguised as a blessing, I tells ya.

[Xanatos]

It's a curse disguised as a blessing, I tells ya.

For a while I wished I had never found the game. In the first week or so after finishing Rin, I was just absolutely devastated. Completely crushed. It's a little better now, but it's still a raw wound...

It might be a blessing disguised as a curse. The process of playing KS is excruciating, but you come out the other side a better person. (At least most of us have.)

May be too late for that whole "better person" thing...

[Lianam]

It's a curse disguised as a blessing, I tells ya.

For a while I wished I had never found the game. In the first week or so after finishing Rin, I was just absolutely devastated. Completely crushed. It's a little better now, but it's still a raw wound...

It might be a blessing disguised as a curse. The process of playing KS is excruciating, but you come out the other side a better person. (At least most of us have.)

Let me guess- you got her neutral/2nd bad ending?

[Xanatos]

How so?

Well, insofar as I've seen, it's nigh impossible to make any new connections out of school. People are busy with shit, they're not making any pals. Can't improve without any help in my case.

[Denabu]

First post on this forum, and before reading KS I saw it as a 'forever-alone' kind of read, but I feel bad for even thinking that. Everytime I start a route, I can't stop myself from reading it until it's done, if I have the time. I've played through Shizune's route (both endings) and Hanako's Good ending (Hanako being the one I just finished). I didn't cry but I came close, and I can't bring myself to even see her neutral or bad endings. I just can't do it, I'd rather just move onto another route.

[bhtooefr]

"saving" Rin

I'd suggest playing Hanako's route. To 100% completion, but doing it without a guide ideally.

It'll be... educational for you, I suspect.

Speaking of which, Hanako and Emi's routes both tore me up big time, although I've recovered.

[Potato]

I can't bring myself to even see her neutral or bad endings.

You're doing it wrong.