Hanako's Broken Heart Club

[Neoteros]

@Chupachups. Welcome to the forum and thread. Honestly, Didn't therapist gave you some advice. In my opinion, To overcome a shyness is not hard, But to overcome a childhood trauma is other thing. I think you should, as others said, try to pratice. But you could try to talk to male therapist if you never done. He probably mitigate awkwardness in yourself better than female one.
I thought I would suggest you to google some boy's face and try to pratice with it. But it's probably have some side-effect which I thinks it would make you worse.

@Neotoros No! The most beautiful girl isn't your love. I mean, by what right do you have to judge a girl as "most beautiful" while being simply 1 (or a few) out of 7 billions of living human. At least show some respect to my own.

Just kidding, I understand love (A kind of love, actually). She might not be the most beautiful but for some reason she already taken your heart to other side of the world (if assume that she isn't in Africa). I suggest you to keep talking with her, Follow your heart. Because it's make any schoolboy like us feels like we have taken dose of pure ecstacy. Maybe indirectly tell her that you like her (because I can easily imagine how awkward it is to being near a "friend" who loving you and try to show it now and then) Someone, probably Walrusfella, told me that don't try to make platonic relationship with her because it will not end well.

Oh? Her name is Mattia. Right? You aren't not quite good about "privacy reasons", especially when I consider myself to be a potent stalker via internet.

Mini-Update : Moral of Yesterday - One of the best way to keep yourself from playing facebook for (yet another) admission test in first weeks of 2013 is tell your crush to do so.
Moral of Today : Some girl (like my crush) simply feels empty with "Singled" status. She might switch back to "In Relationship" despite it's ended in real life.

...

[Chupachups]

Hello there again, thank you so much for the support guys; it was really wonderful to see that kind people still exist. I'm sorry I've taken some time to respond; I had to purchase a new laptop and do some Christmas shopping.

@Pyramid Head: Thank you for the warm welcome PH, I appreciate such kind gestures. Don't start calling yourself old, I am Twenty-three myself. The problem is that I do not tend to scare people away, I am scared of people. I tried practicing and it has improved my social skills greatly, they might not be good but they are far better than what they used to be.

@Fiandra: Hello there ! With the help of my therapist, and the help of close friends I am improving greatly. The scared part is going away slowly, and I'm finding myself more confident to adress people (Online more, for obvious reasons)

@Beoran: Hello and thank you for the warm welcome, and thank you for opening this wonderful thread where people can find support and comfort. Ever since I've stopped talking to my father, which is now nearing the four years, I've been getting better and better. I didn't suffer such difficulties as a child, but now, it's like things finally sunk into place. About talking to other people, well, I've tried with friends and it's working quite well. My sisters are out of question, since they are way more fucked up (excuse the term) than I am. They're both married now, one at Eighteen and the other at Sixteen and have newborn children; talking to them will only make my position worse. The therapist is supporting me quite alright, but she refused to help me at first, saying that I needed to decide, myself, to take the first step toward an improved future. She is more of a friend than a therapist, and her advices are simply wonderful.

@Exbando: Hello Exbando ! I can maintain a conversation with Men/boys just fine if it on a professional level, where I'll resort to calculated and quick answers. Once someone starts to ask how I've been or how is life, I jump into "Ivegottagodosomething" Mode. Haha.

@Auratus: Well, sometimes, I stare at Hugh Jackman's poster and pretend we're having a conversation. Haha, just kidding. The Therapist was quite helpful, but I'd first, she didn't want to pressure me into doing anything; she put options in front of me and told me to choose one. My childhood is not really Traumatic, it has just embded in me ideas that I am struggling to overcome and that are negatively affecting me. It's like waking up one morning to find everything you've ever believed is a lie: The Oxygen is not necessary to live, water is a gas, earth is a molecule and babies come from rainbows and glitter clashing on a white Canvas.

[Xanatos]

No, my name's Mattia. ^^ And I have some stalking skills too. XD

Just don't become another OP-kun...

@Chupachups: If babies came from that, I think they'd be less repulsive. And more sparkly.

[Auratus]

@Neoteros Will it illegal/amoral if I suggest you to improve or use it?

@Chupachups Well, Your therapist is right. You DO have to overcome it yourself. (replying in Beoran's section) and glad you are kidding about that poster. I imagine you might became emotionally attached to him or poster or your imagination if you do that for real (that's side-effect I mentioned)
To think of it. Waking up one morning and find that everything you've believed is a lie is the worst nightmare to me right now. How can I get good score in Physics test (that I would take in first week of January along with other 6 subjects) if people believed that gravitational force is pulling upward?

@Xanatos. That would be a good-quality story. I will read it soon. (LOL at ramen post)

[Xanatos]

@Xanatos. That would be a good-quality story. I will read it soon. (LOL at ramen post)

You should. It's hilarious. It even has fanart.

[Beoran]

Hi Neoteros,

First of all, welcome and thank you for your story. My wife and me are also from a different country, so I can sympathize. However , you will have to ask the one you like straight out if she loves you too. Friendship alone won't cut it. You'll need to get a job if you haven't to be able to afford the plane tickets, and go visit her to see if you get along in real life as well. And if you do, you'll probably have to get married to be able to be together, so yu need time, money and effort to make that happen. It's a though and uncertain road ahead, but if she loves you and you love her, you can make it. But don't start stalking her! :p

Oh, but if she's form Russia, forget it, those are fake girls from the Russian maffia in 99% of the cases. Sorry to say that. Some other countries are also like that...

Chubachups,

I'm sorry to hear your sisters are not doing well. It seems young to be married with children only at 16 and 18. What are their husbands like? I hope that their case history will not repeat itself... Good to hear you have a therapist who's giving you a strong push forward. In life, others can help us, but as your therapists says, it's important to take the initiative ourselves. Perhaps you could make a plan to give yourself some life goals, some things to achieve before you reach 30.

And you're welcome about this thread. I just started it because I felt there was a need. It couldn't exist without KS, the hundreds of people who contributed to it and our gracious moderators who allowed it in the first place.

[Neoteros]

Hi Neoteros,

First of all, welcome and thank you for your story. My wife and me are also from a different country, so I can sympathize. However , you will have to ask the one you like straight out if she loves you too. Friendship alone won't cut it. You'll need to get a job if you haven't to be able to afford the plane tickets, and go visit her to see if you get along in real life as well. And if you do, you'll probably have to get married to be able to be together, so yu need time, money and effort to make that happen. It's a though and uncertain road ahead, but if she loves you and you love her, you can make it. But don't start stalking her! :p

Oh, but if she's form Russia, forget it, those are fake girls from the Russian maffia in 99% of the cases. Sorry to say that. Some other countries are also like that...

Chubachups,

I'm sorry to hear your sisters are not doing well. It seems young to be married with children only at 16 and 18. What are their husbands like? I hope that their case history will not repeat itself... Good to hear you have a therapist who's giving you a strong push forward. In life, others can help us, but as your therapists says, it's important to take the initiative ourselves. Perhaps you could make a plan to give yourself some life goals, some things to achieve before you reach 30.

And you're welcome about this thread. I just started it because I felt there was a need. It couldn't exist without KS, the hundreds of people who contributed to it and our gracious moderators who allowed it in the first place.

...

[Auratus]

No, she's not from Russia... ^^ She's from the United States.

I will quote myself.

You aren't not quite good about "privacy reasons",

I rather use this post to post abut my reaction from story that Xanatos posted.

EDIT : Finished 1st thousand. There is a fine, but obvious line that seperated sane and insane fallen-in-love. My reaction to my crush's Facebook inactivity for 3 days is quite like that guy plus "Hey, Are you alive?" post on her wall, few incomprehensible metaphoric post to anyone but me and "Are you OK?" on Facebook chat minus heap of E-mail.

...and you know, One of my greatest fear is that my current or future crush will end up have crush on my 2-years-younger brother that considerable number of my classmate tells me that he is handsome.

EDIT2 : That make me thought (´･ω･`) guy brings stupidity to a new height. Then I realized there weren't any at first.
That fanart really like what they say : A picture is worth a thousand words. In this case, a almost-thousand post.

EDIT3 : Well, Both of my crush have pretty distinctive smell, IMO. Old one have used pretty strong and notable scent of soap/perfume/softener that I notice few times out of my school classroom, Fewer that make me finds if she was there (We are classmate if you forgot). The new and current one is her breath. I thought it smells like something mildly rot in her. Back then I felt she might have a bodily disorder that cause so, and after that tutoring session ended for few week and I just done Emi-running when I once again sense that from my own body and feared that it might be contagious. But later found that My breath also smells like that when I'm hungry. So it might plausible that she carry good number of snacks with her then (and give me some) because her "disorder" is "always hungry" .

My lover's life aside. This story reminds me that my common sense and morality is still working. This story also make my fear of darkness return of my early childhood. Thanks Xanatos.

EDIT4 : Just ended. Thank you, Xanatos for make me waste 4 hours that could be used for study for January Test (like I will have read the books anyway ) For anyone who done read it. My crude "investigation" and cruder japanese tells that the story didn't have any more pot ever since. By now, (´･ω･`)-kun should have a children by now...

[Xanatos]

Well, Both of my crush have pretty distinctive smell, IMO.

Protip: Do not sniff your date.

[Kelvin Goodwood]

Hello I'm not very good at introductions so please forgive me. I've been contemplating for awhile if I should even be posting anything because what I am going to say could be pointless or somewhat stupid, but whatever i have been holding onto this for 3 years and i believe its time to "leave it behind" as it were.

in my early teens (around 14 years old ) I arrived at a highly religious school and i was practically a textbook "outcast" in the eyes school officials because I was in a group that had a deep resentment of most religions, we were great fans of most metal genres ( and I still am a fan ) we got involved with the occult because of a girl I had a crush on, that and i think my friends did as well. The group I was in didn't do much and eventually said "fuck it" because of the way the girl's "outside of school" friends were just too much. We got picked on a lot for that by highly religious students, it only stopped when the assholes got expelled last year, and it has oddly only affected me and now I'm socially anxious and have gained the inability to talk to girls that I am not used to being in the presence of. ( kind of screws me over because that means I haven't had a girlfriend yet in two LONG years)

*long and boring post short i was in my stubborn and stupid years made some real poorly decided choices that made my life miserable for three years(can't socialize like i used to) been voted as " one of three heads of houses" ,my teachers are sadistic, need help and/or advice to show my fellow students that I'm not the same guy I was years ago

[Hadokant]

Hey guys, It's been like I don't know a few months and I would like to update my little story.
For anyone that doesn't know the story, My first true love died of Cancer and I got all depressed about it. So anyway I feel a lot better now and I'm over it. It made me understand the value of life more and how that I should live my life to the fullest for her sake. After all she wouldn't want me to sulk for the rest of my life. I used to think that i didn't deserve love because of how much of a shithead I was when i was younger. I don't think that way anymore and now I know that I deserve all the happiness that comes my way. R.I.P Shirley, Forever always as gentle as can be, You'll be at peace and covered in love through all eternity.

[Xanatos]

covered in love

I lol'd.

Sorry.

<<;

[Fiandra]

covered in love

I lol'd.

Sorry.

<<;

You are a bad person, Xanatos ):<

[Beoran]

Dear Kelvin Goodwood,

Welcome and thank you for your story!

I dare say that the school you are on is not doing you much good. Is there any way you could move to a school with a less stifling atmosphere? If not, then you'll have to try to get along with the people there as good or as bad as it gets. But you have different tastes in music and probably different views on religion, so it's OK to ask of others that they respect you as a human being regardless of your tastes and your views, as long as you don't harm anyone. If you can't change schools, you'll probably have to hang in there and do your best to get good grades and slip under the radar until you graduate. It may be hard, but I hope it will turn out for the best for you.

[Myshina]

Oh, but if she's form Russia, forget it, those are fake girls from the Russian maffia in 99% of the cases. Sorry to say that. Some other countries are also like that...

Excuse me ?