-

[Nekken]

Mistake. Play it through. You'll feel better in the end.

So I've heard, but it feels like asking me to put a fork in a wound since you'll already be prepared for it.

Getting disabused of one's own white-knight notions is tough. For me it came long before this game had ever been concieved (even by RAITA), but I've been there, right down to the "mind wreaking havoc" part. My suggestion to you is to do Lilly's route right away, and put what you've learned in your other paths into practice. I know the thought of going back is scary -I of all people won't hold that against you- but please trust me on this. It will be all right. I know it isn't right now, but it will be.

I don't know what you did, and I don't think this is a good place to talk about it anyway. But Another Katawa Shoujo is right: it's done, and can't be undone, but you can still learn from it. You can become something more than the person who did those things, and in fact you need to: that's what will get your conscience off your back. The first step is getting through -not over, but through- the initial shock, and this may take a while. After that, it's largely up to you.

You can decide whether or not to do Rin's path later, after you've done Lilly's. I strongly urge you not to do Rin's path before then, however.

[Resign102]

-

[Mysterious Stranger]

I really do sympathize. At first I went ahead and got Hanako's good ending, since I kind of figured out that that was the way the story was going (i.e. white knight Hisao vs. relatively distant but still supportive Hisao), and how those respective paths would turn out, but once I summoned the courage to get her bad ending (I always have to steel myself when I know I'm headed towards a bad ending in this game), at that point I did see a little bit of myself in Hisao's actions. I don't think it's that uncommon of a complex regardless though, and it just goes to show how goddamn brilliant this game is in how it applies to the real world. Plenty of beautiful life lessons to be learned here.

Also, I absolutely recommend you do Lilly's route, if nothing else. Besides being far and above my favorite girl/route, everything about that narrative is really just absolutely gorgeous. Rin's path is... well, let's just say your "fork in the wound" metaphor is a tad understated in the case of her route's multiple paths.

[Nekken]

I strongly urge you not to do Rin's path before then, however.

Why? Awkwardly enough, that is the save I was just about to load up and proceed with.

Getting into that I somewhat spoilery, but let's just say I think it would be better for you to have a bit of a boost first before you go down that path.

[Resign102]

-

[N. Bekkler]

Regret is a funny thing - it can show you your mistakes and help you learn from them, but eventually it becomes a painful and repetitive reminder of your greatest failings. Still, you have recognized something in your behavior that you dislike and are taking steps to remedy it. Just don't beat yourself up over it.

I think that's part of the dance between the theme of Katawa Shoujo and the proverbial 'White Knight' instinct. You try to be courteous, but it comes off as condescending; you try to be helpful, but it comes off as patronizing. The girls in this game are not damaged little flowers that need to be saved - sure, they have baggage and problems like anyone else, but they're not necessarily looking for you to solve them (I should probably note here that I have only completed Emi's route and am currently on Lilly's, but I have sensed this theme throughout the game).

This extends to real life as well. While being there to lend a hand from time to time is fine, but if you try to offer a remedy to every little problem then it gives the impression that you believe the other person can't take care of themselves. The trick is to find a balance.

Thank you for sharing your thoughts, this has been an interesting read.

[micechasekittens]

I guess I have a version of this, albeit slightly different and the fact that I'm a girl. Due to having difficult childhood with lots of emotional abuse at home and bullying at school, I have a lot of issues with depression, esteem, and confidence. I tend to look for other girls who could understand where I'm coming from. When I'm with someone who is confident, I tend to seek reassurance constantly and I slip into the damsel in distress that needs saving role. Those without depression tend to not know what it feels like so it makes me feel even more lonely.

When I'm with someone who is depressed and shy like me, I stop focusing on my issues to be there for them. I no longer feel powerless and weak. It is like we are two wounded doves helping each other to fly again.

So yeah first time I really ever admitted to any of that. Needless to say, Hanako was my favorite because it felt like I was looking in a mirror albeit no scarring. Yet, I got much grief and still do over my prominent Jewish nose which makes me feel hideous (got told many times I'd be cute if not for my big ugly nose). I did get the good ending though so I'm not as bad as I was some years ago ^^. I don't understand super confident, extroverts though especially when they wish to go back to their 'carefree childhoods' as mine was a nightmare.

I know ultimately I need to work on my issues and not lean on others as much as I do. Throwing myself into my hobbies has helped me. My confidence grows with every piano piece learned. I drown myself in writing and work so hard on perfecting my manuscripts that it finally is paying off (got an agent who wants to pitch my book to publishers) which is another boost to my confidence. Though my self worth is very much based on accomplishments as opposed to feeling of intrinsic self worth hence why I hate lounging around and must constantly be working on some creative endeavor.

=) Thanks to anyone who actually read this and hopefully at least someone kind of understands (I always fear that no one can relate). Lol these forums sure are therapeutic.

[Snow_Storm]

Katawa Shoujjo actually turned me into a Black Knight where I'm not a total complete pussy with women. Does that count?

[Resign102]

-

[Mysterious Stranger]

Katawa Shoujjo actually turned me into a Black Knight where I'm not a total complete pussy with women. Does that count?

I have no quarrel with you, good sir knight. But I must cross this bridge. I command you, as King of the Britons, to stand aside!

Yeah, I went there. Yeah, it was an easy joke. And yeah, I think it's funny.

[yz]

it really, really scares me that people like you still exist. i'm glad you've realized your mistakes, though.

[Guest]

Well, advice duly noted. I sorta had the feeling Rin was gonna wind up being an odd scenario from the get go anyway.

Basically, if you feel any attachment to Rin, it's going to be a crazy ride. It's pretty emotionally exhausting, so I'd agree with staying away from it if you still feel unsure of yourself right now. Take some time, maybe do Lilly's route because hers is really sweet, and then get back to Rin when you can take the ups and downs.

Totally worth it when you get to it, though. Rin's is my absolute favourite story.

[Mysterious Stranger]

it really, really scares me that people like you still exist. i'm glad you've realized your mistakes, though.

Er, sorry, but were you talking to Resign102 for his white knight complex, or to me for my terribly obvious Monty Python joke?

Also, I think it's worth mentioning - Lilly's route is kind of the opposite of Hanako's, at least in that there's a distinct lack of a white knight complex in Hisao. Not going to spoil anything, but if you look at Hisao and Hanako's relationship in her bad ending and then compare that to Hisao and Lilly's relationship in her neutral/good endings, they're polar opposites in how they develop. It's rather interesting, in fact.

[yz]

it really, really scares me that people like you still exist. i'm glad you've realized your mistakes, though.

Er, sorry, but were you talking to Resign102 for his white knight complex, or to me for my terribly obvious Monty Python joke?

ah, the first one. sorry for being ambiguous

[Rivan]

I strongly urge you not to do Rin's path before then, however.

Well, advice duly noted. I sorta had the feeling Rin was gonna wind up being an odd scenario from the get go anyway.

I always felt Katawa Shoujo has a certain educational value both taken straightforward and symbolically.

Whereas Hanako helps you kill your inner white knight (congratulations on that, by the way), Lilly has other values, despite them being friends. In a way, she's both similar and the exact opposite.

Rin is the most complicated of them all both in terms of gameplay and in terms of educational value, however. If you like things a little too quirky and symbolical, you might want to take that path anyway, but if you're more interested in something... well, "normal", Lilly is the girl to go for.

Also, due to her own personality, Rin may accidentally try to use necromancy on your White Knight. And that'd be just bad.