Would you date a girl/guy with a physical disability?

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Caesius
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Re: Would you date a girl/guy with a physical disability?

Post by Caesius » Thu Jun 25, 2009 8:45 pm

Not really into amputees, while something like blindness or deafness would make things difficult and complicated. I'm fairly shallow, though, so it goes both ways if the girl is cute. Hell, even disregarding disabilities, I wouldn't even consider going out with a girl if I didn't find her physically attractive. Must be why I've never had a girlfriend -- I reject all the plain girls who obviously have a crush on me and yet I can't bring myself to socialize with girls that I have a crush on. :roll:

I don't think I'd want to go out of my way to hit on an otherwise very cute girl who happens to have a disability like it'd boost my confidence or something, either. I mean, if we for whatever reason start socializing and I find that I like her, then sure... but as much as I like to take a practical approach to everything, my interactions with people is one thing I'd rather let "just happen" rather than turning it into a science. Just like how I don't want to go out with plain girls to boost my ego before "stepping up" to cuter girls, I don't want to start off with a girl who has a physical disability just because I think she'd "settle" for me -- regardless of whether or not she'd consider it settling. I mean, I'm not unattractive or anything, but I couldn't help but feel that way if I were to go out with a disabled girl for any other reason than because I genuinely like her, disability and all.

And for the record, I absolutely would not be able to get myself to like a girl with a mental disability. I just wouldn't be able to get past whatever such a disability would entail, even if they're "gifted" in some way and are physically attractive. I'm not just shallow in the physical sense.
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Despair Sensei
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Re: Would you date a girl/guy with a physical disability?

Post by Despair Sensei » Thu Jun 25, 2009 9:04 pm

Would I date a girl with a physical disability...

You know what, that's a good question. I'll let you know when I develop the skills to get any kind of girl.

That should be sometime around the time Uwe Boll makes a good movie.

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Bara
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Re: Would you date a girl/guy with a physical disability?

Post by Bara » Thu Jun 25, 2009 9:17 pm

Caesius wrote:And for the record, I absolutely would not be able to get myself to like a girl with a mental disability. I just wouldn't be able to get past whatever such a disability would entail, even if they're "gifted" in some way and are physically attractive. I'm not just shallow in the physical sense.
Yeah, I must confess to having more than a small amount of bias against mentaly disabled people. (Crazy I can handle; retarded, uh uh! No dice.) I could not get involved with someone less intelligent than I am. Smart chicks = turn on, even with plain looks; dumb chicks = turn off, even if they are centerfold looks, they can only at best be fap fodder.
Not very nice of me possibly, but it is my honest take on it.

You know this does make me wonder why I preffer Emi to Shizune? Normally I'd be all for the smart, pretty, glasses wearing girl but something about Emi's character; the way its written, just appeals to me.

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Super Guest Man
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Re: Would you date a girl/guy with a physical disability?

Post by Super Guest Man » Thu Jun 25, 2009 9:25 pm

This might make me shallow but I would defiantly have to be attracted to them, so therefore there disability has to be something that won't detract from their allure. But the second side to this is I feel I have a decent range of what I consider to be beautiful and attractive so I hope I'm not that shallow, of course their personality and who they are as a person comes into it but its that initial attraction that would catch my attention in the first place.

The issue with any physical disability with someone I'm interacting with is overcoming the initial shock of them being different and then finding out how they handle it, not the best example but I had a new guy start at my work a few months back who was missing an arm, at first I was a tad uneasy because I didn't know how to act with him about it until he started cracking jokes left and right about it (or just left in his case) and I realized he was at ease about it so I could be too. The issue, therefore, of dating someone with a disability for me comes down to if I'm attracted to them and how they act. I don't see someone with a disability as being more of an attraction to me (don't have any fetishes towards that) than an able bodied person, but it would add a interesting element in getting to know that person as compared to a "normal" person.

Though all of this does seem to be pretty much the same from my dealings with an able bodied girl, so I think it comes down to whether or not I can deal/handle/ignore/accept their differences.

Makes me think back to Hisao and Yuukos comment about peoples problems being an elephant you're trying to ignore, its only and elephant if you make it one.

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Re: Would you date a girl/guy with a physical disability?

Post by callmeemo » Thu Jun 25, 2009 9:30 pm

Bara wrote:Yeah, I must confess to having more than a small amount of bias against mentaly disabled people. (Crazy I can handle; retarded, uh uh! No dice.) I could not get involved with someone less intelligent than I am. Smart chicks = turn on, even with plain looks; dumb chicks = turn off, even if they are centerfold looks, they can only at best be fap fodder.
Not very nice of me possibly, but it is my honest take on it.
I'm actually right there with you. Granted, there are some hobbies that would need a match, but intelligence is key as well. I have a favorite look, of course, but that wouldn't matter in the end.

Disabilities are...iffy. I think I could date them and all, no problem, but depending on what it is...it probably might not turn out so well. Too many complications, I'm sorry to say.
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Hypothermia
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Re: Would you date a girl/guy with a physical disability?

Post by Hypothermia » Thu Jun 25, 2009 9:50 pm

Ok, you can't handle the retarded. How about Asperger's? That's a nice middle ground.

I for one find their conversations to be amusing.

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Caesius
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Re: Would you date a girl/guy with a physical disability?

Post by Caesius » Thu Jun 25, 2009 10:18 pm

Hypothermia wrote:Ok, you can't handle the retarded. How about Asperger's? That's a nice middle ground.

I for one find their conversations to be amusing.
Being a computer science major I've had classes with two different aspies. CS majors are naturally perceived to comprise the most socially inept of college students, but these guys take it to a whole new level. I know that I'm strange, but only insofar as I'm the "class clown" type -- Aspies are strange in such a way that they aren't aware of or can't control what makes them strange. I also don't think that I would find their conversations to be amusing; more uncomfortable.
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Re: Would you date a girl/guy with a physical disability?

Post by Hypothermia » Thu Jun 25, 2009 10:34 pm

I've had aspie friends. Once you get over the "didyouknowthattheoctopusdoesn'tactuallyhaveanytentaclesitactuallyhaseightarmsthatsbecauserealtentaclesonlyhavesuckersattheend" factor they're really interesting. Of course, that's subjective, but what isn't? Other... than facts.



For those who don't get the abbreviated segment, aspies are known to try to talk with people but end up dumping information about a topic that interests them. This is because they usually cannot tell whether the other person cares or not. KK?

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Re: Would you date a girl/guy with a physical disability?

Post by Bara » Thu Jun 25, 2009 10:35 pm

Hypothermia wrote:Ok, you can't handle the retarded. How about Asperger's? That's a nice middle ground.
I've never been exposed to anyone with that. I suppose it would depend on the essential things I consider: are they smart, are they personable enough I can deal with them, are they attractive to me.
Of course then the obverse is true; I don't apeal to many "normal" folks. I certainly don't think there is anything about me that would be enticing to someone with that condition. :lol:

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abscess
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Re: Would you date a girl/guy with a physical disability?

Post by abscess » Thu Jun 25, 2009 10:54 pm

I was of the idea that physical attractiveness was implicitly present (not needed to be mentioned). Yes, I'm as shallow as the next guy, blame us all.

As for aspies, their conversations tend to be interesting at times, but that's when they are smart. For example, what if there's a person with the syndrome that is incredibly interested in rings, I can't comment on that not make conversation on that subject, but if there is a topic we both know about and are interested in, it's interesting to see what their insight may be and even discuss with them. It's entertaining and at times even educational. But then again, I have only dealt with a person that could be considered only mild aspie, not entirely into the mold (if there is one).
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Re: Would you date a girl/guy with a physical disability?

Post by Nightdragon » Thu Jun 25, 2009 10:55 pm

Honestly, it depends. If I knew her before, but then she got in an accident (like in Emi's case), I would still probably go out with her. That's how I feel about my fiance. And I know she feels the same. Like if I come home from Iraq or Afghanistan missing an arm or leg, she would still marry me. And someone like Hanako wouldn't bother me either. I'm pretty shy now, and even more so in high school, so we would probably run into each other from our loneliness. I have alot of friends who aren't "socially acceptable", so to say, also. Just need something to start up a conversation, and things could probably work out between us.

Lilly could possibly work, and thats a big if. Since shes still able to talk, it wont be so bad. Shizune, on the other hand, would never work for me. Sign language is too complicated for me to learn (uncoordinated and general laziness), and I'm afraid we wont be able to communicate effectively without it. Rin could also work with me. I'm fairly tall, so we would complement each other nicely.

Now, before you start destroying my comment by saying how I only would want to go out with the girls from the game, here's my disclaimer. For sake of abbreviation, I used the girl's names as a substitute for the actual disabilities. Therefore, when I say I wouldn't mind going out with Lilly, I actually mean all females who are blind, not just the character Lilly. Now, you gotta keep in mind the usual eliminating factors (good looking, good personality, etc.). So all in all, it is a case-by-case basis depending on whether I would like to go out with the girl or not.

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Re: Would you date a girl/guy with a physical disability?

Post by Granado » Thu Jun 25, 2009 11:00 pm

No.

Because I would feel more as a babysitter than romantic interest.

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Re: Would you date a girl/guy with a physical disability?

Post by ROFLWAFFLE! » Thu Jun 25, 2009 11:31 pm

Doesn't matter to me what's wrong on the outside.
Only the person inside, I like em' for their personality.
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Re: Would you date a girl/guy with a physical disability?

Post by Malek » Thu Jun 25, 2009 11:35 pm

To be honest i dont see how missing an arm,being a little off or even having blindness or being mute could stop love.


Sure it would take time to get past things like that(hopefully not a whole lot)but i am sure it could work.



Love this game by the way.


Have a nice Day.

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Re: Would you date a girl/guy with a physical disability?

Post by State of Mind » Thu Jun 25, 2009 11:52 pm

Personally, I think that would not see a disability as a blockage for dating someone. Because, I feel that if i am considering committing myself to someone and the reason I am I find to go against is because of something the person probably/surely had no control over . I think that would be very poor character. Maybe this is because for very long time (until they passed away) , I have had to deal with a disabled family member. So I think that at least for physical disability, I can man up and look beyond it. Because of the unfortunate events that lead to my grand-fathers paraplegic state, he was able to take care of me and my brother when we were little . This gave my parents the chance to keep working and not have to hire a permanent babysitter. This also though me how a disability in a person does not change the way they interact with people. So for example, if my girlfriend were to suddenly develop a state of deaf-muteness, i think i would learn sign language because she is going to have to anyways to function so why not do the same. As for a similar condition to Hanako's, as far as I can see, the burns that Hanako has suffered have not totally disfigured her. I do have to admit that , if for instance the burns suffered would have totally destroyed the entire body , it might more of a shock to me then a sensory disability. Not knowing how i would re-act, i still say that i would be a trouper in the matter and support my girlfriend through the healing process. How would you feel , if you abandoned a love one after a traumatic experience like that? That is how i see this whole situation.

As far as meeting dating someone for the 1st time that would have a disability. I think that besides the communication barrier that a sensory disability would impose at 1st, I would look passed the disability and focus more the personality. This might sound very cliche and corny , but i think that personality is the best way of jugging a person. For example, I would rather date a victim of slight facial scarring that is compatible to me and could be my sole mate , then a very good looking person who is about as deep and emotionally interesting as a box of shoes.

In sum, I honestly think that as far as dating someone with a physical disability , I think i would man up and explore the aspects of the person looking passed what sets them apart from my only on a physical level.
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kickboxing. I didn't think that through .I guess the machine won in the end. :)

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