Hanako's Broken Heart Club

A forum for general discussion of the game: Open to all punters
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Razoredge
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Location: Bordeaux, France

Re: Hanako's Broken Heart Club

Post by Razoredge » Thu Apr 04, 2019 2:43 am

The blind one is the one I am the closest to. I told her a lot of things before, without handler her with kid gloves, and she always appreciated my honesty. So, I think she'll understand what I want to say to her, Maybe she'll have a sulk for a while, but she will realize this thing. For this dumbass, he's not my friend anymore. He did things I can't forgive, and I will never forgive him. Thanks for you words, and remember you have all my support.
Lilly = Akira > Miki = Hanako > Emi > Rin > Shizune

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marantana
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Re: Hanako's Broken Heart Club

Post by marantana » Thu Apr 04, 2019 10:53 am

My oncology knowledge is limited. I am a biochemist, and I did work at Novartis at the time they introduced Gleevec and some breast cancer stuff, so that's only what I learned on the fly.

Well, Vienna... it's the second largest German speaking city (after Berlin), and it was the capital of one of the big world empires back in the times. So yes, there's a lot of culture and science going on and there are many headquarters of international organisations here (parts of the UN, UNHCR and many others). Since after WW2 it's always been under social democrat city government so everything that's good for the "99%" works very well here. Despite the far-right state governments we sometimes had (and presently have). "Far right" meaning Trump or a bit worse. On Mercer's ranking of "cities worth living in" Vienna has been #1 in the world for 10 consecutive years now.

All that said, it's a city of ~2 Mio inhabitants and like all metropoles it does have ugly sides too. But at least the violent crime rate is very low and it's no problem even for young girls to walk the streets at night alone.

So yes, it's worth visiting.

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Hacksorus
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Re: Hanako's Broken Heart Club

Post by Hacksorus » Wed Apr 10, 2019 2:45 am

Walrusfella, I'm glad to hear that you're doing all right. I can't imagine how I'd react to such news, but it sounds as if you're handling it just as well as anyone really good. We may never have even talked before, but I have such deep emotional roots in this obscure community that I empathize with your story more than I would with most people. Rambling aside, I'm rooting for you.

Razoredge, your situation sounds pretty complicated, and there's not too much to go by here. I'm glad to hear that you stood up for yourself in some sense, though; in order to get respect from others, sometimes you first have to show them that you don't have time for those who won't respect you.

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Walrusfella
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Re: Hanako's Broken Heart Club

Post by Walrusfella » Sun Apr 14, 2019 8:04 pm

Thank you Hacksorus, that was very kind to say. It's really heartening to have an old KS hand like you pulling for me. I'm trying the best I can to do this well; some moments I'm resilient and behaving as I hope to, and some moments (hopefully fewer) I catch myself being small and resentful and scared. I've got my first post-diagnosis appointment with my haematologist in a couple of days, so I hope to get some more answers and plan longer term.

Marantana, that sounds like interesting work! I've added Vienna to the list of places I'd like to go. I've been able to cross a few off in the past few years, but since getting this problem I've felt the urge to travel more and see more places.
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FrauPerchta
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Location: Innsbruck, Austria

Re: Hanako's Broken Heart Club

Post by FrauPerchta » Tue Apr 23, 2019 2:16 am

Seems like I keep coming back here; from when I was... what? Fourteen? On an account I don't even remember? Something about... its not even about the game, but this thread. These people. I don't know any of you, but you mean a lot to me. I'm so grateful this is still here.

So, I guess I end up here when things are bad; like you do. Still haven't done much about being trans; its been years. My antidepressants barely work and I've been diagnosed with paranoid personality disorder, which basically means my brain is constantly making shit up. Someone walks up the stairs? Check to make sure the door is locked so they don't come in and hurt me! Shower curtains; pure evil, something's behind there. Its so frustrating to wake up at 3 am hungry because I haven't eaten all day and be too afraid to leave my room. I'm so scared of... myself? Used to be just anxiety but now, I'm not even afraid of failure, I'm afraid of getting obsessed with challenges that arent real when I've already got enough on my plate. I have a 10 page essay due thursday; would be fine, if I didn't also have another essay, a take home test, and finals next week. What the heck are they trying to do to me?

My grades aren't great and its frustrating because I'm better than that. Like, I know what I'm capable of but then something makes me not like myself anymore and I'm just useless. I hate it, and I wanna change and escape. Hopefully I'll be able to move back home to Austria in a few years, once I save up some money. I wanna get a PhD there, just one more year before I get my bachelor's in economics. I won't even be 21 yet (like that stops anyone). Its weird; I didn't think adulthood would be like this. I don't feel like I've changed, in fact thats the problem, I want to and everything feels like its against me changing.

Anyway, reading the other posts here... I'm sorry, yall. Walrusfella, all my thoughts and prayers, whatever they count for, to you. I hope you have a lot of time to do things you want, and that things are as easy as they can be with something like that. On Vienna; its a beautiful city. I reccomend the zoo there; my great-uncle Helmut was the director a while back. I remember he took us to the back areas and we got to see... I think it was Emus? Wonderful. Personally, though, if you have time, go to Tirol. Innsbruck is a much smaller city, but still beautiful, with a lot of history. And the mountains; my God, the mountains. I'm biased as hell because thats where home is, but its honestly my favorite place in the world. Beautiful nature, beautiful old city, and a wonderful church, the golden roof, all sorts of museums, cafes, and the Alpenzoo is another great zoo where you can see animals native to the area; the lammergeier, or bearded vulture (a really beautiful bird) and the Lynx are my favorite there. Either way, Austria is a great place to visit. A lot less.. rushed, than Germany, and a lot less of our history got destroyed. Berlin is pure modern, theres almost nothing left there (and not much was there anyway). And we have good food!!!!

Razoredge, I encourage you to... how do I put this? Don't be too forceful about this. Don't upset people, even if what you say is true. You should say it, but be careful about how you do. Prioritize being there for your friends when they need you, and in the long run things will be okay, I hope. Just make sure your dislike of these bad people doesn't lead you to upset those you care about; that wouldn't be worth it. Things are complicated, and I'm sorry you have to deal with that.

Hacksorus, I'm not in Austria rn but Griaß di!
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marantana
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Re: Hanako's Broken Heart Club

Post by marantana » Tue Apr 23, 2019 5:29 am

FrauPerchta, woatamoiwoatamoiwoatamoi... do is echt wer zweiter aus Österreich in dem thread? Seawas, griassdi.
[note: I just said hi to my fellow Austrian here]

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FrauPerchta
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Location: Innsbruck, Austria

Re: Hanako's Broken Heart Club

Post by FrauPerchta » Wed Apr 24, 2019 3:01 am

marantana wrote:
Tue Apr 23, 2019 5:29 am
FrauPerchta, woatamoiwoatamoiwoatamoi... do is echt wer zweiter aus Österreich in dem thread? Seawas, griassdi.
[note: I just said hi to my fellow Austrian here]
Ja, I bin Chloe und kimm fõ Innschpruckh. Kimmst du aus Wean oder was? Isch guat das wir hap zwei fõ Österreich (und koan fõ Daitschland oder?)
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marantana
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Joined: Thu Jun 14, 2018 5:43 pm

Re: Hanako's Broken Heart Club

Post by marantana » Wed Apr 24, 2019 7:29 am

Jo, Wean. I bin da Peda ;-) -- a oida Hund, dea sei Overwatch-Sucht durch visual novels ersetzt hod. Iwasetz grod da ebi-hime ia näxde ins Deitsche. twitter ozdergecko. Und jo, find i a guad

RealChestnut
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Re: Hanako's Broken Heart Club

Post by RealChestnut » Fri May 24, 2019 11:49 pm

i just played the Hanako Ikezawa route and all i can say now is that i am incredibly depressed now... while going through this i kept on thinking how this girl is almost identical to my ex, the only difference was that instead of physical scares it was more mental. She hide from others, she pushed people away, never talked, never used her phone and always tried to say and do things to push me away when she was depressed. A lot of the scenes that happened between them felt close to what i experienced. She even told me about an event that happened to her in which affected the in level i can not even comprehend and apparently i was the only one she ever told, not even her family. In this game in where u can make a wrong decision, i even did the wrong decision they even provided in real life. i thought that because she was always like this she needed protecting and i acted like she needed protecting, not showing her my other emotions she was looking for, she did a lot of things with me to try make me see her as someone who i truly love and not someone who only needed protecting. because i was too ignorant to see this we slowly became distant and and at the end it was too much for me where she would barely contact me or see me anymore that i had to end the relationship. playing this makes me realise what i should of done and that i question why did i not show my other feelings more.

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Walrusfella
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Re: Hanako's Broken Heart Club

Post by Walrusfella » Tue May 28, 2019 3:55 am

Wow RealChestnut, Hanako's story must have cut very close to the bone for you. Hanako's story also resonated for me when I first read it, because I saw parallels with the early stages of my relationship. I ended up being more forthright in telling her my feelings (not because I was wise or courageous or anything, I was neither at the time) and it paid off for us in the end.

It appears you've worked out what went wrong in your relationship and learned the lessons, and hopefully grown wiser for it. Even though it didn't work out, you're a better you for having grown. Perhaps going back and reading the "good end" of Hanako's story might be cathartic?
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ArmedLiberal
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Re: Hanako's Broken Heart Club

Post by ArmedLiberal » Mon Aug 12, 2019 10:43 pm

Walrusfella, I can't even begin to imagine that kind of diagnosis. I hope that you have the support of all around you in managing your treatment. *hugs*
Walrusfella wrote:
Tue Apr 02, 2019 3:49 am
Hi there. It's been a very long time, particularly in internet terms. I posted fairly regularly on this thread in 2012 and 2013 (roughly pages 25 to 200). Some events in the past few months have put me back in mind of Katawa Shoujo and the good people I talked with on these forums. Borean, Gandara, AsrealEternal, Xiious, Camoufrage, Total Destruction, Bionic Kraken, Xanatos, Otaku Ninja, Auratus, Gamera Ramen, Dream, and all the others that used to be on this thread, I pray that you're all doing well and enjoying life, and the problems that prompted you to post here are not troubling you anymore.

Wanderingheartache, I remember you from years back. I'm very sorry to hear about your colleague. I've experienced that myself. We can get to know the people we work with so well, and grief can hit harder than we expect. Glad to hear you've recovered, and it heartens me to see a name I recognise.

I've often considered posting on this thread again, but always held back. I'm now 36 years old. Most of my problems from back then are now fixed. I finally have a job I like, and I don't worry constantly about money. I bought a nice little house. I still do very fulfilling hobbies. My marriage is still strong we're planning on children later this year or the next. I've studied the Japanese language to the point where I claim to speak it at least poorly. I have a few good friends. I still paint toy soldiers.

With all this finally sorted out, of course it's not all going to go my way. A few months ago, while investigating another problem, I was diagnosed with Leukaemia. It's a blood cancer, and my type is not curable. It's not very aggressive, but barring something else catastrophic it will get me in the end. My life will likely be a lot shorter than I might reasonably be able to expect without this.

I'm still adjusting to this, but my experience reading Katawa Shoujo has actually helped me deal with the worst of the initial shock. I know it's fictional, but Hisao coming to terms with his diagnosis and coming to accept his situation was an example I could draw upon to beat back despair and resentment.

My wife took the news a lot harder; she was devastated. I suppose something like this is easier to bear when it's happening to yourself, rather than someone you love. She's coming to terms with it slowly, and I feel terrible that I will likely leave her early.

I'm in a big city with a modern hospital with a good cancer ward, and I have a very good haematologist. Despite her distress my wife has documented and coordinated my treatment so it can be as efficient as possible, and has been a tireless advocate for me so there won't be any chance of the system forgetting about me or bungling anything. My family and friends have been very sympathetic and supportive, particularly good friends who recently lost their son to the same disease (albeit a more aggressive variety). I haven't told my employers, but they undoubtedly suspect something's wrong given all the doctors' appointments. They haven't pressed me, and they've been very accommodating.

Despite all this, it still sucks and it's still frightening. I think I'm in the right frame of mind where I can read KS again and it may bring some comfort. Thanks for listening.
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