Search found 90 matches

by Zerebos
Sun Mar 11, 2018 11:49 pm
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Ungraceful Reunion - An Emilogue (Chap 4 - Updated 2/20/19)
Replies: 18
Views: 11151

Re: Ungraceful Reunion - An Emilogue (Chap 3 - Updated 3/11/18)

Well it took me all day to read this—not due to the writing itself, but because I got busy. But MAN it was worth all the time I took. You got some great writing going on here Scratchman. The story itself is so unique and captivating, and your characters feel so alive I love it. Tsu is absolutely ado...
by Zerebos
Thu Mar 08, 2018 4:38 pm
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Within a Looking Glass – A Rika pseudo-route
Replies: 112
Views: 47556

Re: Within a Looking Glass – A Rika pseudo-route

I was actually in the middle of replying when I noticed you updated. The story so far is cute, but to me it feels like things are being rushed along especially with that most recent post. Perhaps that's intentional especially due to how your Rika is but the whole timeline feels very quick. Your SPaG...
by Zerebos
Fri Mar 02, 2018 10:21 pm
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Re: Learning To Fly - A Saki pseudo-route (New NSFW Art 2/22)
Replies: 1197
Views: 906056

Re: Learning To Fly - A Saki pseudo-route (Updated 1/6)

“Gods,” Saki says, a laugh bleeding into her shaking voice. “I can’t believe we did that.” Is Saki meant to be calling out to all the gods? :lol: Another good chapter, the shooting gallery scene was pretty cute and makes sense for Shizune's attitude. Poor Mitsuru though, if he knew what that yukata...
by Zerebos
Mon Jan 08, 2018 1:18 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Re: Learning To Fly - A Saki pseudo-route (New NSFW Art 2/22)
Replies: 1197
Views: 906056

Re: Learning To Fly - A Saki pseudo-route (Updated 1/6)

Great update as always Euro. I really enjoyed the interactions between Saki and Hisao during their night together—the playful banter, the kind words. It all felt real and warm. The writing itself was great, makes me wish I could capture scenery and thoughts the way you do. Only thing I didn't really...
by Zerebos
Tue Jan 02, 2018 3:10 pm
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Our Holiday Vacation — A Shizune One-shot & 8S Submission
Replies: 8
Views: 5490

Re: Our Holiday Vacation — 8S Submission

First, I want to say thank you to everyone for the kind words. I really didn't think this would be so well received as I've never written Shizune before nor do I usually do such fluffy pieces.That said, I rather enjoyed writing it and might have to think about doing happier writing in the future in ...
by Zerebos
Mon Jan 01, 2018 8:25 pm
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Two Turtledoves (Lilly x Hisao S8 oneshot)
Replies: 9
Views: 7110

Re: Two Turtledoves (Lilly x Hisao S8 oneshot)

This story was really cute Euro. I think you did fairly well with the Lily POV. Although towards the beginning she seemed a little too improper/relaxed for my headcanon. That quickly changed when you used the phrase: so we have to get through it to get to the mall proper I don't know why but that fe...
by Zerebos
Sun Dec 31, 2017 1:18 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Our Holiday Vacation — A Shizune One-shot & 8S Submission
Replies: 8
Views: 5490

Our Holiday Vacation — A Shizune One-shot & 8S Submission

Your Prompt: Hisao and Shizune go on a trip to (someplace not near Yamaku, urban enough to have like...a mall or something idk), temperatures drop really quick so they have to go shopping for temporary winter clothes to survive their trip. Fluffy waterside scene with snow and stuff encouraged but n...
by Zerebos
Wed Nov 22, 2017 2:37 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: From Tokyo To Mumbai
Replies: 13
Views: 8381

Re: From Tokyo To Mumbai

Thanks for the kind words to both of you! Scratchy, I was doing my best to make sure it's a bit different than the norm, and good catch on the nod to Yamaku. Sharp-O, if you're scratching your beard then I'm doing something right :D Is it bad if it took me multiple reads of that to figure out the er...
by Zerebos
Wed Nov 22, 2017 2:25 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: For Want of a Nail - Misha Route (Updated 11/1/19)
Replies: 585
Views: 475461

Re: For Want of a Nail - Misha Route (Happy Birthday, Misha!

What a way to return Prof, you end the cliffhanger but tease us with his parents being in town and him unable to leave for break. I've never had such mixed feelings for a chapter before. I probably didn't have as much of a rollercoaster as Hisao being messed with by the Nurse going back and forth be...
by Zerebos
Wed Nov 22, 2017 2:00 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Star Watchers
Replies: 5
Views: 3278

Re: Star Watchers

I took the risk to download it and I thought it was a pretty cute story. There were some formatting issues, see the pinned thread "tips for writers" and you should be set on that. Other than that there was just a few points in the beginning where you seemed to use very short non-flowing se...
by Zerebos
Wed Nov 22, 2017 1:39 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Mask Off: A Molly Route (Update 3/8)
Replies: 72
Views: 43492

Re: Mask Off: A Molly Route (Update 10/31)

And the tension between the legless ladies grows. I know this is supposed to be a Molly route but with how forward and persistent Emi is being it almost feels like she could win out and make it her own story. That being said, he'd be a fool to not go with your Molly, who we are finally starting to l...
by Zerebos
Wed Nov 22, 2017 1:04 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Re: Learning To Fly - A Saki pseudo-route (New NSFW Art 2/22)
Replies: 1197
Views: 906056

Re: Learning To Fly - A Saki pseudo-route (New Artwork 9/17)

Latest chapter is fantastic as always Euro. Your depiction of a couple like them having their first time felt wholesome and real. There was no "heart can't take this" gimmick either so bonus points. Definitely nice to see them progressing in their relationship, wonder how this kind of step...
by Zerebos
Wed Nov 22, 2017 12:42 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: COM(promise) - A Miki Route (Updated Sep 26th, 2020)
Replies: 217
Views: 126106

Re: COM(promise) - A Miki Route (Updated Sep 5th, 2017)

Whoops, looks like I never commented on the update on here. I really like the progression we see in these chapters, the interactions feel very real. And I'd have to agree with Mirage there's not much of a tone shift, so don't worry, all is well!
by Zerebos
Thu Jul 06, 2017 12:33 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: StilesLong's One-shots - The Secret Santa
Replies: 23
Views: 18117

Re: Blackout [One-shot]

Probably both :lol: I will make another comment on the fic though, I really like the snow analogy for some reason.
by Zerebos
Wed Jul 05, 2017 2:47 pm
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: StilesLong's One-shots - The Secret Santa
Replies: 23
Views: 18117

Re: Blackout [One-shot]

To substitute for commas, parentheses or colons you use am Em-dash which is slightly longer than an En-dash or a hyphen. I have been trying to tell people—the ones I betaread for—about using Em dashes as well with little success. Although, I think what Visionary was getting at was the phrasing of t...