Katawa Shoujo Forums

Chapter 6 Work dragged on way too long today. After calling Hisao, he assures me he kept his promise but wanted the rest of the night to himself. “Earlier, after you left, I had a small heart flutter that really drained me.” … Oh gods… The worry I’ve been trying to suppress oozes out of my voice. “...

Alright I've read everything that's been posted so far. Boii does Hisao have the VN protagonist curse! Just as many girls falling over him as in the game lol. If it turns into a pseudo-harem story where he's trying to manage all the female attention without any of the dating options trying to kill ...

I like the relationship you've given Hisao and Shizune. When I replayed her route recently, I liked it but hit the same stumbling block as last time: the route isn't about them being in a relationship. I love Misha, and her dealing with depression and her confession to Shizune made sense, but the on...

Wow, is it March 35th already? Spring is really flying by... :wink: BAH! Fixed I really enjoyed this chapter -- I think it's your best one so far. Your first couple of chapters had some iffy moments, but you seem to be smoothing them out as you continue writing. The interplay between Emi and Hisao ...

Chapter 5 Leaving the park behind, we round a corner and continue a short way down a street before Ibarazaki pulls me towards a bakery. The front windows have something… eclectic on them. Not bad, but does that fit a bakery? I catch Tezuka also making her way there, though she isn’t paying any atte...

Emi's running chant from Developments is great. I know it's a part of my head canon. I do have a suggestion. The boy that Emi watched die deserves a name to go with his story. She cared for him, and his memory and the events of his passing will be something that Emi would carry to her grave. He sho...

Interlude 1 - P2 ---Lilly--- BEEP BEEP BEEP *click* “It is 10:40 AM.” I’ve woken up late, again. I remove the remnants of sleep from my eyes and slide off my bed, taking a moment to assess the apartment. I can hear the sound of kitchenware and smell whatever Hanako, I assume, is making. I thought s...

Interlude 1 - P1 ---Mai--- God dammit, why today of all days? Just barely catching the bus, I scan my pass and collapse into a seat. Thank god I’m keeping up my Judo training… As I catch my breath, I take out my phone and shoot a text to my worthless assistant manager to let him know I’ll be there ...

Chapter 4 This morning has certainly been interesting. Ever since Mai came by and made breakfast, we’ve been on the move. Going to a nearby convenience store, visiting a manga place, buying some games and walking everywhere seems to be her answer to how to distract me. Eventually, her main goal bec...

I'm really enjoying this story. I'm curious to see where it goes. “Good! Don’t get the wrong idea, but spending the night with four beautiful women should help! Wahahahaha~” Chapter 3 reveals that there were only three beautiful women at karaoke -- Misha, Lilly and Hanako. Yeah, stuff changed. I've...

Things changed since I posted Chapter 2. There are 4 beautiful women on this chapter, but only 2 with Misha. I have edited the previous chapter. Apologies for missing this. ----- Chapter 3 Mikado leads me to one of the rooms inside the karaoke place; evidently we’re the last ones to arrive. Before w...

A reenactment of me waking up: *sees notification that someone replied to my post* Ah cool! Let's see who pos- *6 posts in the span of 12 hours* OH! Let me get on my actual computer instead of creeping on my phone. ---------------------------------- I suppose it was more the age they got married th...

I approve this story.

Your handle of English is pretty good. Occasional word choice is strange, but because it's an OC I chalk it up as a character quirk. Connotation is always the hardest to pick up in a language, and your writing is easy enough to understand.

Applause! Look forward to more

All that said, I don't want to get too nitpicky. I'm enjoying the story so far, and I look forward to seeing where it goes from here. Then I'll stop being defensive :wink: Someone getting married, or moving in together, while going to college (even first year) isn't that weird to me personally, but...

this seems like a decent story so far, though it's a bit early to say much. What I will say, however, is that Hisao and Iwanako's relationship seems to have progressed ridiculously fast (at least, up until the breakup). Moving in together right out of high school and proposing 8 months later just s...