Katawa Shoujo Forums

Oh dear. And the worst part is that the answers to this topic actually give more and better insight into 4LS than you'd ever. want. to. know. I has a profile. You can has it if yuo want it. You'll need to keep track of stuff like 'male' and 'oldest fart, about least senior staff member' yourself. An...

... As far as I am concerned, you can do whatever you want with Facebook, within license limits. I do, however, think that Facebook is a blight on the level of the Bubonic Plague, all the more so because it is resistant to vaccination and immunization. Any and all relevant linking that I see anywher...

I think you're starting to lose momentum. Rather than going further, reread everything you have put up so far, check, consolidate, cut, tweak everything that can be improved. Everything. There's lots of room for improvement. I'm not any meaningful benchmark or oracle to go by, but I do that for abou...

vernicious knid

The only thing I have a real issue with. There were a few other stumbling blocks I noticed before, but you cleared them up from when I first read to when I actually got around to posting.

Good show.

I caught you out at Yuuko. But as in Hisao's case, by then it was too late and the jaws of the trap had sprung shut.

The very thought of a pimp Hisao was hilarious enough to cause a chuckle. Boy's so not a playa.

Ho-lee shit.

Now (most of) this is a damn good idea, why oh why didn't I think of it before...?

8/10, would read again.
Correction: 8/10, WILL read again. Proceed.

While Hanako's trademark way of speaking positively drips with ellipses, you might want to introduce a little variation by u-using her j-j-just as d-d-istinctive st-stutter in appropriate places. :wink: Also, said ellipses are always made out of three periods, no more no less. You can use smaller or...

3-Glowing Orange Sunset --- I wake up to the annoying sound of my alarm clock and immediately notice a tense atmosphere about the dorm. It's quiet. Too quiet. I slink out of bed. Taking a glance out of the window, I see that everyone else is already up and eagerly watching everything being set up fo...

don't expect anything of silentcook quality :shock: ...awaiting the rest of the story. Concerning critique, for starters Emi and Rin are in a different class from Hisao and Hanako. You might also want to consolidate your text a little, making it into blocks rather than line-space-line-space for the...

Thread re-nuked. Seriously people, take personal discussions elsewhere. Third time around I'm going to hand out bans.

Probably they won't be compatible. We're going to tweak Act 1 a bit and do more changes from now to the full release. You'll only know for sure when it'll be done, but prepare for suckage just in case.

A couple or three of those. And frankly, I wasn't too impressed by the lot...

Smells like machine translation. Machine translation isn't good. It mangles writing from "decent" to "somewhat understandable".
If it's not machine translation, the problem's worse...

Nice first attempt. Stuff & things: -You WISH Rin was that easily readable, so soon. Nevermind so easily flustered. You have Hanako'd her indeed, which goes against characterization. -Some typos here and there; not too many, but unluckily in some really mood-breaking spots. ...like the fooling a...

Listen to this man, he FIGHTS for FREEDOM.

Good stuff Envy, just a few rough spots. And just to see if I can make a few heads asplode, those are the sudden bursts of poetry I'd usually expect from crud.