Katawa Shoujo Forums

Defibrillation is indicated for ventricular fibrillation or ventricular tachycardia. The vast majority of patients will be unconscious, but some might not be. If a paramedic diagnoses one of those conditions after looking at an Electrocardiagraphy of a conscious patient (or they know the patient's m...

No More Pirates Huh... I don't even remember that one. Nice, though, even if the idea of Kenji working in an amusement park is somewhat ludicrous :-) Emi's Winter Break This one I do remember. Must have been one of the first pieces to include a reunion between Hisao and Iwanako as well as the one o...

Important note to all prospective first-aid-givers:
If a patient is still conscious their condition is not bad enough to warrant CPR by far!

With that out of the way, welcome back, good to see you again and all that

Long hiatus. Might be a record - so far...

Okay, the only thing that is really wrong is that tense in the very last line: Now I’m desperately wishing I hadn’t had that kind of an attitude about it. Should be "didn't have" But there are quite a few lines that read... strange. Some of them are due to an overuse of a stylistic element called "p...

that’s not on This is fine. "That's not on" is basically "that's not fair," but with added Britishness. I always saw it as short for "That's not on the menu " - or even longer "on the list of acceptable options" “Not one little bit but the feeling’s mutual so at least that’s something we have in co...

Found a few more. A few extra characters... I remember I was said I was going to split it with Rin “Good advice,” Hachisame says. “I 'd forgot to warn her about that.” it's obvious that if that w h ere the case there would be more of them I really wish ed I remembered their names. ...that you could ...

Oooh... This is going to be ugly...

One correction:

as she pushes past Taro and I

"past Taro and me"

Well... Please take that with a grain of salt, as I'm not a fan of H-scenes in general, but the segue into this one was extremely abrupt. You did announce it at the beginning of the chapter, and I STILL reread that line twice to make sure I didn't misread that^^° Up to that point the story was well ...

The pacing continues to be improved over the first version.
Not much else to say, though other than good work!

You've probably already seen this thread (at least if you got the scripts by legal means). If not it contains a bit of helpful information. For other technical issues I'll try to answer any questions you have as well as I can, and I think some others will as well. Can't help you with the actual lang...

I'm so glad I didn't see those while at work

Much better pacing than previously (though I'm not quite sure where the rewrite begins...)

I think you should clarify the extent of Kyouko's blindness soon. She can't be very blind the way she acts. (finding her way around on her second day and walking faster than the sighted person next to her...)

Why? Maeda doesn't seem to be a bad guy in this story...

I agree with brythain - having an open fireplace in a boarding house for students a good number of whom are movement impaired is probably not the best idea. Might be one of those newfangled artificial fireplaces with fake fire. Kenji might not be able to tell the difference, but still it might be a ...

Regarding Once... Well, no offense, and you probably know it yourself, since you wrote it was unedited and you did much better later, but the writing's pretty awful. There narrative voice is a mix of two subjective narrators changing freely back and forth between each other, and it's not always clea...