Katawa Shoujo Forums

Hey, somebody already found all the typos :-) Well, except for one: Whoever she was, her and her friend were giving me a hard time she and her friend... ...and a missing "it" somewhere but I can't find it again. Very good story and lot's of interesting OCs again. MC's condition does not really fit S...

Nice chapter!
With a cliffhanger like that at the end, I hope your next update will stick to a similar schedule

-ist -> -est

Also there are a few lines of past tense mixed up in here.

As for whether or not the scene works... Kind of? I'm still not sure why Rin would say she's glad Hisao came to Yamaku. They haven't really had enough interaction to justify a reaction that extreme by Rin's standards...

Who is or isn't mature largely depends pn how you define maturity. If you consider someone mature just because they are sexually open, then, yes, Emi is quite mature. Her inability to open up to even the people closest to her however is not mature at all. Now, she has a valid reason for that problem...

That's what I get for posting in the middle of the night

You could say he lost the opportunity to sleep with Meiko - though by his own choice and design...

My guesses on the codes: emi - No idea, so I'll go with your guess of "Emi" emm - Emi's Mom (has got it going on) hi - Hisao nk - Nurse-kun nosex - Nostralith Exordium, Winged Terror of the Seven Hells I can confirm the first four (no bets on the fifth). Those are the prefixes for the lines of the ...

I think most VNs don't really work with a dub - KS less so than most.

Nice chapter, but "I forgive you" is a bit formal for Hanako...

- Misha responds to the perceived cardiac episode by performing CPR - Emi arrives with the AED - The AED is set up, and says "why are you bothering me? the boy's fine" - The nurse arrives, checks Hisao out, and concludes that he's physically fine, but in shock There are quite a few problems, especi...

NIce to see you back in action. Sorry I didn't get the proofreading done in time, but I got the notification that the new chapter was up on Friday, and I was a bit busy on the weekend. Well, there wasn't a lot to comment on anyway, since your writing was superb as always. Personally, I preferred the...

Eh, it was a bit confusing with riding tubes through tubes, but after a while I just stopped trying to visualize it

All in all the chapter felt a bit like filler - just like the pool episodes of most anime are.

Okay, from the grammatical side, there are a few instances of present tense in an otherwise past tense story; otherwise everything seems fine. Your writing style seems to tend towards the extremely flowery - and not just in the lovers' dialogue - but it gets better in the latter half. But there are ...

Well, if you decide to post the story directly instead of as an attachment, I will certainly have a look at it.

You just need a good idea, some insp—in-spir-rate? In-spie… Inspiration!

I always interpreted Misha's difficulties with long words as troubles translating sign language. In the VN, Misha never has trouble with any words when speaking normally.

b12c2018 wrote: ↑

Thu May 31, 2018 5:22 am

Developments huh, haven't read it yet. From the descriptions it seems the relationship involves two girls. Is it true?

Let's just say Hisao is a bit... indecisive in that one. Probably not in a way that would interfere with your enjoyment of the story, though.