Search found 5561 matches

by Mirage_GSM
Tue Oct 09, 2012 10:48 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: YourFavAnon's Various Fictions [Update 3/16]
Replies: 146
Views: 65043

Re: YourFavAnon's Various Fictions [New Story 10/8]

...if I was looking for a woman who wouldn't be a good mother, I would not be married to this woman.
Why would anyone explicitly look for a woman who wouldn't be a good mother?
by Mirage_GSM
Tue Oct 09, 2012 10:41 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Radioactive (or Katawa: Call of Yamaku) (or something)
Replies: 16
Views: 7048

Re: Radioactive (or Katawa: Call of Yamaku) (or something)

Interesting - not quite as depressing as Doomish at his worst but pretty bleak all the same.
At the rate people are dieing here the zone will probably be empty in three days tops.
Stalker reference?
by Mirage_GSM
Sat Oct 06, 2012 3:46 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: The Enemy Within. (Katawa Superpowers Sequel) Complete
Replies: 74
Views: 33321

Re: The Enemy Within. (Katawa Superpowers Sequel) Ch 11 up

So now they've saved Hanako they won't even try to find a cure for that other guy?
by Mirage_GSM
Sat Oct 06, 2012 3:28 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: YourFavAnon's Various Fictions [Update 3/16]
Replies: 146
Views: 65043

Re: YourFavAnon's Various Fictions [New Story 10/5]

Well, let's say I've located the joke, but either I do not understand all of it or I don't find it funny...
by Mirage_GSM
Sat Oct 06, 2012 3:18 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: To Rise Again (Revised 10-4-12) WIP
Replies: 28
Views: 7899

Re: To Rise Again (Revised 10-4-12) WIP

Actually, saying "I've done my part" is taking Shizune's side, but I can see how she would be offended anyway ;-)
by Mirage_GSM
Fri Oct 05, 2012 11:27 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: To Rise Again (Revised 10-4-12) WIP
Replies: 28
Views: 7899

Re: To Rise Again (Revised 10-4-12) WIP

I see how incisive she signs. I think you mean "decisive". I am wasn't sure of which one to use in that sentence I went with incisive because technically Shizune is "talking". That word, I feel, conveys the right emotion.. Apparently there is an alternate meaning for the word "incisive"... I've nev...
by Mirage_GSM
Fri Oct 05, 2012 5:32 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: To Rise Again (Revised 10-4-12) WIP
Replies: 28
Views: 7899

Re: To Rise Again (Revised 10-4-12) WIP

I was a bit confused, because it seems you have rewritten about half of the story so far... For the most part, I like the changes. There are some fresh ideas, and you actually made me LIKE Shizune - that's something not many authors have managed to do ;-) Some of the dialogue sounds a bit stilted, b...
by Mirage_GSM
Fri Oct 05, 2012 4:09 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Searching for a Certain Someone
Replies: 31
Views: 13939

Re: Searching for a Certain Someone

It doesn't really happen all that often that I literally facepalm while reading a fanfiction, but... There was enough proof to at least partly confirm that I'd found who I was looking for, but I wanted it to be a bit more concrete and the only way I could think about doing that is to do another sket...
by Mirage_GSM
Thu Oct 04, 2012 5:59 pm
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Catching Dreams (updated 11/30, seeking advice)
Replies: 34
Views: 11521

Re: Catching Dreams (updated 10/2)

I always prefer reading stories with OCs - if done right they have MUCH more potential for originality.
Just try to avoid Mary Sues...
by Mirage_GSM
Thu Oct 04, 2012 9:24 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: A pseudo-pseudo Suzu route (completed)
Replies: 912
Views: 596647

Re: A pseudo-pseudo Suzu route (updated 10/1)

"Eachother" is not a word.
Happened two times in the most recent chapter, so I thought I'd let you know.
Other than that - nice to see a chapter without so much gloom for a change!
by Mirage_GSM
Thu Oct 04, 2012 8:53 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Catching Dreams (updated 11/30, seeking advice)
Replies: 34
Views: 11521

Re: Catching Dreams (updated 10/2)

I think you managed to borrow a familiar scene from the game without it feeling too much like a cut-and-paste, and Misha's loudness being an actual, real problem for your protagonist is interesting. I mostly agree, but I still wish 3-3 wasn't always the dump for new students. The first contacts wil...
by Mirage_GSM
Thu Oct 04, 2012 7:55 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: YourFavAnon's Various Fictions [Update 3/16]
Replies: 146
Views: 65043

Re: YourFavAnon's Various Fictions [New Story 10/1]

Hmm... Your "Interlude" gave me an idea for a short One-shot.
I'll see if I have time to write it down...
by Mirage_GSM
Thu Oct 04, 2012 7:33 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Staggering Harmony - (A2,S15 Updated 12/30/15)
Replies: 86
Views: 40384

Re: Staggering Harmony - (Updated - Act 1, Scene 10)

Your writing is definitely improving, but I think you overdo it when you seperate scenes. /////////// Is the equivalent of slamming a book shut and searching for the page again. Also think about whether you actually need some of those separations at all. As a rule of thumb, if there is no timeskip (...
by Mirage_GSM
Thu Oct 04, 2012 7:16 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Meanwhile I wait [Hisao x original character]
Replies: 202
Views: 79465

Re: Meanwhile I wait [Hisao x original character]

Very good chapter. I don't think I read about Hisao being told off in this way concerning his behaviour towards Iwanako before.
I also agree that it was better for her not to have read the letter.
by Mirage_GSM
Mon Sep 24, 2012 10:55 am
Forum: Public Discussion
Topic: Map of the novel
Replies: 22
Views: 8245

Re: Map of the novel

Can't find the citation right now, but I think I remember one of the devs confirming there were 4 classes in third year.