Katawa Shoujo Forums

sgtpepper wrote: ↑

Fri May 31, 2019 10:22 am

Relax, it's a story on the internet about some anime girl.

Of course, but without that it could have been a better story on the internet about some anime girl

Yeah, I dimly remember proofreading that one... And I remember commenting that Hisao's behaviour might potentially be considered a tad questionable... Hmm... Maybe I should cut back on the understatement... Anyway, the google doc with my comments is no longer online, but in the PMs when the author a...

It's called "understatement" or maybe even "sarcasm"

sgtpepper wrote: ↑

Wed May 29, 2019 1:17 pm

pretty sure including "gaylord" in your Miki fic is in of the terms of service for the forums

Don't feel pressured to do so. Sometimes a little originality can be more important than cramming in tired memes.

"You are not human if you don't have any issues like that." is a very different statement from "everyone has those same issues" - at least for me it is. As long as you don't put any quantitative qualifiers on either of those statements they do basically mean the same. The main difference being "iss...

Well, if Rin left Yamaku it was the second bad end.

if it was me instead of Hisao, I almost certainly would have said "Explain to me, I need to understand". But after seeing where the halves lead, I can see why somebody else might make that exclusive choices. Still - after denying the bad ending I found that with Rin even the good ending (if indeed ...

“Hikkun!” my mother called, making me grimace. Okay, I have never before seen or heard "-kun" used by parents when adressing their children. I can't swear that it doesn't happen, but it is at the very least rare an it just sounds wrong to me. A parent would rather use no honorific at all if the chi...

Very well written - though I don't think you'd infringe on any copyrights if you just posted the lyrics in question. Having to follow a link to an external page in the middle of reading (something I didn't do) will definitely pull any reader out of the story.

Also, the last years horror-house thing... I mean that's pretty disturbed. I highly doubt Yamaku would let something esculate to that level without significant oversight, especially considering that Shizune and Misha would have likely have been on the case. Also... It doesn't really make Misaki com...

Okay, first of all your tenses are all over the place switching between present and past sometimes within the same sentence, and there are even some... creative constructions like: A day I’d soon never forget which I'm not even sure whether it is supposed to be present, past or future tense... Then ...

Wow, now we know what you've been doing this past month :-) The bit at the beginning with the chocolate felt more like a Food Wars parody than like a part of this story. It was so over the top it really clashed with the rest of it. (And personally I'm also fine with Pockys over overpriced truffles.)...

Is the first one supposed to be Lilly?

Well, looking at the story now I would have a few things more to say about it than when it first came out. The author did mention Lilly's problems matching sight to concepts, but I think it would probably be worse than depicted in the story for a woman of thirty. Well, it is a very short story, and ...

Nice chapter again. One thing you should pay a bit more attention to is to avoid repetitions. Just a few examples from this chapter: Today, I'll swim faster than usual. ... It's a bit faster than usual, but it's bearable. We have a classical literature lesson. ... Today, we talk about classical Japa...