Katawa Shoujo Forums

As for point of view: from various comments I read from you (also to other thread) I think that we're parsing point of view differently. But that said, I do think I don't have much control in this scene. ... I'm aware of this, and I think Miya is, too, at least on some level. However, once this was...

Interesting story so far. I'm looking forward to seeing what you have planned to make this a route and not just a Hisao-x-Miki story. Yep. Conflict. Interesting conflict. That's what sets a a truly good story apart from an average one - and for me it's the hardest thing to write in a story. That's ...

I already have the pills in my room anyway, so it isn’t a problem . I know where you mean anyway, so it isn’t a problem . I suggest rephrasing that to avoid the repetition. “God Hisao, you are so dense. I was trying to say I need to see the nurse anyway, so we can go together. Can’t you pick up on ...

Sorry, can't read it as it is. Please fix tenses, and I might try again. It's present tense, it's always been like that. I gave it another try, and it turns out it was just the first few paragraphs where past tense slipped in and present perfect was used oddly a few times. The rest of the chapter i...

Sorry, can't read it as it is. Please fix tenses, and I might try again.

But at the same time, he can come across as pretty cool guy. I can't think of when it was,...

At the same time?

But jokes aside he is definitely becoming less douchy. Add a bit of character development in the coming chapters, and soon he'll be likeable ^_^

I'm going to feel bad for Emi when this develops. :'( Oh yeah? Well I'm rooting for Emi. There are enough Hanako/Hisao stories here; let's have some variation. You know, you've got a point there. I'm by no means done with the research for the archive, but of the stories I've done so far, the vast m...

I'm having a bit of trouble picturing them spending five to six hours in the Shanghai and then about three or four hours wandering lost through the town... It's a small town and Yamaku is on a hill - a hill that Hisao got winded climbng in the VN even without having to carry Suzu^^° Apart from these...

So far, neither Hanako nor Emi have sent any definite hints that Hisao could take...

Even if they had - so soon after breaking up with his girlfriend he could probably be excused for missing them.

What is needed for this to happen, is the ability to make sprites and music, and to be able to get backgrounds for it. it's just that personally i always found that writing the story is the hardest part of something like this Pardon me for asking, but you're looking for people to do sprites, music ...

Why not?
It's more likely than there being a Japanese person actually named "Othello"...

As for the Tram, well in my head I always pictured places like Kyoto having them everywhere, more likely a few trams. Kyoto used to have trams up until the 1960s. Today they have two subway lines and a very convenient network of busses - easy to use and also cheap. I will do my best to fix the tens...

Sorry, but the in the first half of this chapter you jump between tenses so much it is all but unreadable. It's like it was written by a different person than the first chapter... And what exactly is wrong with your OC? Missing two legs, an arm and an eye? Don't you think you're laying it on a bit t...

Interesting start so far.
A few missing words here and there but nothing major.
I assume this is going to be the day Hisao arrives at the school?

Thank you very much for your feedback. I actually had to think really hard about Misha adding the chan-suffix to his name. In the end I went with it after noticing that she started calling Hisao Hicchan after not knowing him very long. It's not really a problem. I just noticed that in fanfiction, M...