Katawa Shoujo Forums

Ascended Flutist wrote:Also, I'd appreciate if only one other person would coment after this post. I prefer to have my next chapter come out at the top of the page. Call it a whim.

Oh yeah? Well what if we decide we're just not going to comment at all anymore? Then what do you do?

…

Dammit!

I'm enjoying the story. Nice to see more minor characters in the spotlight.

DanjaDoom wrote:though I suppose you shouldn’t judge a book by it’s cover.

Aaaaaand here's a grammar lesson. Don't worry, this is one of the simplest to remember.

its = possessive
it's = it is
There are no exceptions.

Your rewrite is definitely better than the original. We're still waiting for the actual conflict to start. Ben seems fairly adapted to his situation, much more than Hisao was when we first met him. None of the things I'm about to mention are problems with the story, but they do conflict with canon. ...

Nice so far. Let's see what you can do. I must admit that Hisao starting up morning runs with Emi is very likely in all paths except Shizune's, possibly Rin's. Hisao just doesn't have enough activity for his health. Except, of course, for 'healthy adolescent sex drive'. The earnest smile I've learne...

But Scott Pilgrim would be proud.

Just… stop.

Maybe you could make it as "it's a wonderful life" style tale where Hisao winds up seeing what would have happened if he hadn't come to Yamaku, and is given a chance to make things right. Do you think you might do that? If you just do it as is, it would be a really depressing story. The problem wit...

Guest wrote:I think you're one of the best fanfic writers on the KS forum

QFFT

You write it, I'll read it, themocaw.

"Oh man, can I really read a Rin/Nomiya story, especially one adult rated? No, that's too horrible… but it's written by themocaw! I must read it!"

Well, my faith in your writing is intact.

Interesting speculation. As BobBobberson mentioned, these would be great if expanded upon.

The only correction I would offer is that Atlanta actually has an active gay community. Still, the stereotype in the US south exists for a reason…

As a fan of Shizune, I always let the stories written before the full release that had her as the villain just role off my back. Most of them made her a caricature anyway. And now you write a story that makes fans of Hanako hate her? Duuuude…

That was very good. It took me until Rin's bit to realize you finished each part with a regret related to their individual phrases.

I would sit, play, and experience this new emotional roller-coaster and cry again. (If the arc was handled in such a way that brought up those emotions.) Well, there's Rika's Story by Rikabro in the fanfiction area… And a Saki Pseudo-Route by themocaw as well. Just a warning: neither of these are f...

Oh boy, more themocaw goodness!

themocaw wrote:The scar in my chest tears open

And this is when I knew it was Rika.

Yeah, strip out the KS stuff and make it your own. Just let us know where you put it.

I don't watch Dr. Who. I'm the kind of person who, if an interest develops, would need to purchase all the DVDs of a series. Dr. Who would be too expensive.

Still, I know enough about it to enjoy this story.