Katawa Shoujo Forums

Well that was all very sweet. Not so much that I'd get diabetes, but still.

One little correction, and I just realized that it contributed to some early confusion I had with your story: Mutou's first name is Akio, as shown here.

Mr. Jazzels wrote:HOW COULD YOU TURN ALL OF THE GIRLS INTO DICKGIRLS EXCEPT FOR LILLY
HOW

He totally did that too.

Their relationship should be unusual. If Hiroshi is in high school and Katsumi is a doctor, she should be at least 12 years older.

Okay, you have a lot of typos. Starting with 'foreword' is one word and his name is Hisao.

Your concept is interesting, so I'd be interested in seeing more. But please get a proofreader.

Rika's one year behind Emi in school, but Emi is one year older than everyone else in her grade due to her time stuck in the hospital/therapy. But Rika is (jokingly) presented as a potential romantic interest for Hisao. I cannot imagine, even in a April Fool's joke, they would have her be under 18....

OtakuNinja wrote:I just want to add a little thing to this masterpiece: Miki lost her left hand, not her right.

How do you get the impression that isn't known?

People sometimes jump to the latest page because they think that's where the update is. Then people are idiots. :lol: Just click on the little square with the arrow pointing down and right, just to the right of the thread title. If you hover over it, it says "View first unread post". That's what I ...

It's a bridge between the end of the Amaya/Tadao altercation and the trip. I could have glazed it over with a few paragraphs, but there were a few things I wanted to close down, and a few others I wanted to open up - I also wanted to live in Aiko's head while she's kept out of the loop. She starts ...

Hoitash wrote:

Helbereth wrote:
They say, "write what you know," right?

True, although if I followed that motto I'd be writing stories about Theodore Roosevelt and Ulysses S. Grant fighting zombies and werewolves.

...

Damn, I'd read that. And I'm not a big fan of zombies or werewolves.

Rika's only one year younger than Emi.

But aside from that, this was a really entertaining chapter. I think you've got Emi's voice much better than you did before.

..says Lilly to Hisao and I. ...the relationship between Hisao and I. You make this mistake a few times in this chapter. It should be "...Hisao and me." I think this usage is not completely wrong, but at least to me it sounds incredibly formal and old-fashioned - like something straight out of a Sh...

Banda wrote:FemHisao and Lilly

Liar! Clearly this should be FutaLilly. Then I won't be so surprised.

The only reason I haven't perused your Suzu story is because I don't want to end up confusing the different tales. I'm pretty sure our Suzu stories are pretty different. I think you'd be able to read them both with no worry :) I'll say. Scissorlips's story is Suzu/Hisao from Suzu's POV, and DanjaDo...

Banda wrote:probably should pay more attention to them instead of pushing 'em out so fast.

… Nah, too easy.

Interesting avatar change. Appropriate though.