Katawa Shoujo Forums

Knowing this is all just a bit of a fun romp and that I shouldn't take it too seriously, this is enjoyable. At least she wouldn't have to deal with bad memories and pain. I would think those two should be reversed. Dying from the monsters would have pain. The fire would have pain and bad memories.

I'm with Mirage on the skipping of irrelevant dialogue.

And yes, Helbereth and Hoitash certainly are guilty of making 'firework of witty repartee'.

That's guilty! Guilty, guilty, guilty!

blindness; not a lot of Seeing Eye cats out there. This should be a double-hyphen -- rather than a semicolon ; No, because nobody under any circumstances should use a double-hyphen. The proper punctuation here is the em dash — We're using computers here, everyone; don't treat it like a typewriter. ...

AHEM. I don't get it. If SuperfluousU is like me though he'll love that a dev kinda noticed him. I had goosebumps when it happened to me. What you are supposed to 'get' is that Silentcook linked to the forum post about not requesting anything from fanfic writers. It's a big no-no, and can lead to t...

Okay, I really liked this chapter. Your OC is so different from all the others. I like that Hisao is perceptive when given the clues. Like in Emi's route when he takes the time to talk with Mutou. And I'm convinced that Hisao knew perfectly well that the most likely explanation for Emi's emotional i...

It lives again! Interesting to see a story started before the release continue after it. I just made my stories short enough not to worry about that. One comment: while 'nobody of us is going' is grammatically correct (nobody being a singular noun), to English ears it sounds awkward. I suggest 'none...

Read my sig.

You're right Oddball. I'm not sure I could have voiced that problem before you pointed it out, but it definitely affects my perception of her.

The eyes are what give me the biggest problem. I much prefer the final version.

Well I finally got passed. Congratulations, Talifan9.

"Oh great," I thought. "Another new post on a thread that hasn't updated in over eight months. "Why won't they learn… wait, the story is hosted elsewhere? And the last update was at the end of March?" But I won't be reading it anyway. There are limits to what I can take in a crossover, and this goes...

Uh, I was taught to place two periods after a space, one after a comma. If ..you ..did ..that ..your ..posts ..would ..look ..really ..strange. 8) Seriously, though, the first thing I do when I get a text to proofread is replace all double blanks with single ones. Repeat if any are found. Guh, I di...

The only other comment I have to make is that I only just noticed that you make the much-more-common-than-it-should-be error of having two spaces after periods. That should have died with monospaced typewriters. I've heard stories of typing teachers who still teach the 'two spaces after periods' ev...

“Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot. — BY ORDER OF THE AUTHOR, per G.G., Chief of Ordnance.” —Mark Twain Love the quote. It occurred to me as I was ...

Well as another inexperienced fanfic writer whose first writing was well received by our fellow forumites, I commend you on this. Quite enjoyable.

In my case, I got an idea for a story and my mind couldn't stop working on it until I got it written down.