Search found 20 matches

by M4rked0ne
Fri Nov 01, 2013 11:41 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Life vs. Living [OC x Hanako/post Lilly-good end/18+] Ch. 4
Replies: 27
Views: 6860

Re: Life vs. Living [OC x Hanako/post Lilly-good end/18+] Ch

... and overall comes off as a guy who thinks he's better than he really is (not that that's necessarily true, but it just seems like it)... which is probably why I personally can barely stand him... To be honest with you... that was actually my intention. Creating a character who isn't really like...
by M4rked0ne
Wed Oct 30, 2013 6:22 pm
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Life vs. Living [OC x Hanako/post Lilly-good end/18+] Ch. 4
Replies: 27
Views: 6860

Re: Life vs. Living [OC x Hanako/post Lilly-good end/18+] Ch

Thank you for the explanation, I hope that it will help to avoid to make this mistake again. You might actually want to work on your terminology for genitalia and sex altogether, for that matter. I will say that it's hard to walk the line between clinical, lewd, and clichéd, when it comes to sexual ...
by M4rked0ne
Tue Oct 29, 2013 1:30 pm
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Life vs. Living [OC x Hanako/post Lilly-good end/18+] Ch. 4
Replies: 27
Views: 6860

Re: Life vs. Living [OC x Hanako/post Lilly-good end/18+] Ch

I'll grant Lilly Daredevil-level hearing so she can discern if someone is limping even if a sighted person fails to notice it... But how can she distinguish whether he's limping on the left ot the right leg? ^^° I guess thats one problem of my format. :/ Hisao “But it’s impressive that he can play ...
by M4rked0ne
Mon Oct 28, 2013 4:52 pm
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Life vs. Living [OC x Hanako/post Lilly-good end/18+] Ch. 4
Replies: 27
Views: 6860

Life vs. Living [OC x Hanako/post Lilly-good end/18+] Ch. 4

Chapter 4 “You messed up? What do you mean? What happened?” “I-I tried to invite Andrei for lunch a-and I panicked and run away…..” Surprise is written all over their faces. “You…invited him…for lunch?” Surprise is also in Hisao’s voice. “I-I tried to invite him! But I…I…” “Calm down Hanako, take a...
by M4rked0ne
Mon Sep 23, 2013 11:59 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Life vs. Living [OC x Hanako/post Lilly-good end/18+] Ch. 4
Replies: 27
Views: 6860

Re: Life vs. Living [OC x Hanako/post Lilly-good end/18+] Ch

Bookmarked just in case you are still writing this Indeed. I'd love to see more. First of all: Wow, people are still interested in my fanfic...I can't even believe people like it in the first place. :o Second: Yes, I'm still writing (though not really frequently). In fact, Ch. 4 is actually finishe...
by M4rked0ne
Sat May 04, 2013 5:54 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Life vs. Living [OC x Hanako/post Lilly-good end/18+] Ch. 4
Replies: 27
Views: 6860

Re: Life vs. Living [OC x Hanako/post Lilly-good end/18+] Ch

Looking forward to seeing more. I think you do a pretty good job of nailing Hanako's personality. Of course as always, I'm always a bit nervous when she gets involved with an OC. I hope he's gentle with her. Thank you for your reply, I'm happy that you liked it. I can reassure you that he'll be gen...
by M4rked0ne
Sat Jan 19, 2013 5:29 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Life vs. Living [OC x Hanako/post Lilly-good end/18+] Ch. 4
Replies: 27
Views: 6860

Life vs. Living [OC x Hanako/post Lilly-good end/18+] Ch3

Chapter 3 Another mundane day begins for me. Getting up, going to classes, listening to some music and playing basketball. This is my daily routine, more or less. Even though I just got here a week ago, I’m pretty sure that this routine will last till I graduate. At least I don’t see how it would c...
by M4rked0ne
Sat Jan 05, 2013 9:58 pm
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Life vs. Living [OC x Hanako/post Lilly-good end/18+] Ch. 4
Replies: 27
Views: 6860

Life vs. Living [OC x Hanako/post Lilly-good end/18+]

FlyingRiceBowl wrote:Any updates?
Chapter 3 still gets proofread by a friend of mine and I'm currently working on Chapter 4. I think the update should happen in the next two weeks.
by M4rked0ne
Sun Nov 25, 2012 4:51 pm
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Fanfic - KS Afterstory: Lilly Edition
Replies: 18
Views: 6685

Re: Fanfic - KS Afterstory: Lilly Edition

So far, I really like it. It's very well written, but then again I don't really have a very high standard. :D Some spelling mistakes were there, but nothing to get excited about. Well, there is one thing what was bugging me: Lilly is a little bit too well-spoken around Hisao in my opinion. I felt it...
by M4rked0ne
Mon Nov 05, 2012 4:11 pm
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Life vs. Living [OC x Hanako/post Lilly-good end/18+] Ch. 4
Replies: 27
Views: 6860

Re: Life vs. Living [OC x Hanako/post Lilly-good end/18+] Ch

I'm not sure it's explicitly stated when Hisao gets his uniform, but even if your OCs uniform wasn't ready for the first day, and even if Yamaku is pretty lenient in these matters, he probably would be expected to at least wear something more refined than what you described. He has his reasons why ...
by M4rked0ne
Sat Nov 03, 2012 6:28 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Life vs. Living [OC x Hanako/post Lilly-good end/18+] Ch. 4
Replies: 27
Views: 6860

Re: Life vs. Living [OC x Hanako/post Lilly-good end/18+] Ch

Okay, not bad for a first attempt to write in a foreign language. Still a lot of grammar issues, the most glaring of which are the tenses. I suggest you ask around for a proofreader, since discussing all of them here would be cumbersome. First of all, thank you very much for your response and your ...
by M4rked0ne
Thu Nov 01, 2012 5:28 pm
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Life vs. Living [OC x Hanako/post Lilly-good end/18+] Ch. 4
Replies: 27
Views: 6860

Life vs. Living [OC x Hanako/post Lilly-good end/18+] Ch. 2

Chapter 2 “Lunch like always, Hisao?” “Sure, catch you later then.” I give Lilly a small farewell kiss on her lips and go two doors further to my classroom. I arrive a little bit early to class so only a few students are present. Hanako was one of them. Like always she is so absorbed in her book th...
by M4rked0ne
Thu Nov 01, 2012 5:23 pm
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Life vs. Living [OC x Hanako/post Lilly-good end/18+] Ch. 4
Replies: 27
Views: 6860

Re: Life vs. Living [OC x Hanako/post Lilly-good end/18+]

Chapter 1 *beep beep ..…. beep beep ….. beep beep* I try to open my eyes to find the source of this annoying sound, but the only thing I see in this blurry vision was something red. To clear my sight, I rub the sleep out of my eyes. The next thing I see is my alarm clock, which shows me that it is ...
by M4rked0ne
Thu Nov 01, 2012 5:21 pm
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Life vs. Living [OC x Hanako/post Lilly-good end/18+] Ch. 4
Replies: 27
Views: 6860

Life vs. Living [OC x Hanako/post Lilly-good end/18+] Ch. 4

First of all, English is not my native language and this is my first attempt at writing fan fiction, so please forgive me in advance for making bad mistakes. Most mistakes should be caused by experimenting with the English language, so I don’t really know if you can say things in that way like I’m g...
by M4rked0ne
Mon Oct 29, 2012 11:27 am
Forum: Fan Works
Topic: If Katawa Shoujo were more of and H-Game (Adult Content)
Replies: 95
Views: 42955

Re: If Katawa Shoujo were more of and H-Game (Adult Content)

So if KS were more H after the existing good ending, Hisao and Hanako would go to a love hotel and have a better second time. I think someone did that one already in a fanfic, but don't remember which one it was.... Well I'd certainaly love to see some of it. Not even the H-stuff necisarilly. Love ...