Search found 153 matches

by Dawnstorm
Sat Apr 23, 2016 2:05 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Meanwhile I wait [Hisao x original character]
Replies: 202
Views: 96071

Re: Meanwhile I wait [Hisao x original character]

I haven't been here in quite some time. I came back here mostly on a whim, because the current anime-season's Shounen Maid 's set-up reminded me a little of Miya's backstory. I didn't expect to find my story on page 1. Rats, I was hoping for an update. Oh well. At this point it's probably best to co...
by Dawnstorm
Mon Jan 13, 2014 3:25 pm
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Meanwhile I wait [Hisao x original character]
Replies: 202
Views: 96071

Re: Meanwhile I wait [Hisao x original character]

family(?) Apart from her mother, the closest thing she has to a family. [Relevant scenes: the first flashback where Miya freaks out at her mum (a mention in passing), and the scene where Hisao meets Miya's Mum (a bit more background).] It's sort of funny, but I've got Hotaru's story outlined in my ...
by Dawnstorm
Sun Jan 12, 2014 7:17 pm
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Meanwhile I wait [Hisao x original character]
Replies: 202
Views: 96071

Re: Meanwhile I wait [Hisao x original character]

Well, that was interesting. Makes me wonder if maybe Miya is asexual. Never thought of her that way, but it's entirely possible. Kotori needs to grow up, come out, and raise mongooses (mongoosi?) with Misha. I'm pretty sure "mongooses" is correct, though I'm quite fond of "mongeese&q...
by Dawnstorm
Sun Jan 12, 2014 8:47 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Meanwhile I wait [Hisao x original character]
Replies: 202
Views: 96071

Re: Meanwhile I wait [Hisao x original character]

For story-post navigation please refer to the index post . Soul Dissipation (#2): Childhood Friend The banded mongooses at the Small Mammal House of Ueno Zoo have had children. Little mongooses, Kotori counts four, are bouncing this way and that, energetic, curious, careless. Baby mongooses are so c...
by Dawnstorm
Thu Sep 12, 2013 3:03 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Meanwhile I wait [Hisao x original character]
Replies: 202
Views: 96071

Re: Meanwhile I wait [Hisao x original character]

Well, since I've written pretty much the entire story like that, I won't change the basic approach now. There's gotta be a reason why you brought it up with this scene, though (even if it's just cumulative frustration). I do remember a similar criticism from you back in - I think - part one.
by Dawnstorm
Wed Sep 11, 2013 1:50 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Meanwhile I wait [Hisao x original character]
Replies: 202
Views: 96071

Re: Meanwhile I wait [Hisao x original character]

It's about time for Hanako to return. She's fiendishly difficult to write as well, but for different reasons: it's voice. Actually this update seems like a really close example to how I picture Hanako in my mind's eye in terms of her brooding loneliness and perhaps a bit of a morbid imagination, bu...
by Dawnstorm
Tue Sep 10, 2013 10:17 pm
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Meanwhile I wait [Hisao x original character]
Replies: 202
Views: 96071

Re: Meanwhile I wait [Hisao x original character]

Anyway, what Third Person Limited does not have is Stream of Consciousness narration Like Bagheera, I disagree with this statement. But: You are leaving the narrator behind to jump into Hisao's head for a single sentence, that's why that part clashes with the rest of the story. I think I do see som...
by Dawnstorm
Tue Sep 10, 2013 5:58 pm
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Meanwhile I wait [Hisao x original character]
Replies: 202
Views: 96071

Re: Meanwhile I wait [Hisao x original character]

Oh god yes an update. Will post a more detailed review later but for now, YES. Thanks. Looking forward to your ideas about my writing. It's always interesting to see how people react. I'm happy to see an update, though this update doesn't make me at all happy. I tend to reflect the mood of the scen...
by Dawnstorm
Tue Sep 10, 2013 2:26 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Meanwhile I wait [Hisao x original character]
Replies: 202
Views: 96071

Re: Meanwhile I wait [Hisao x original character]

For story-post navigation please refer to the index post . III.1. The Depth of her Loneliness On his way to the rooftop Hisao finds an open door. Only one more flight of stairs, and he would have reached the rooftop, the weekly lunch with Emi and Rin. The door isn't really open, not in the sense tha...
by Dawnstorm
Sat Aug 10, 2013 2:58 am
Forum: Public Discussion
Topic: Would you watch Katawa Shoujo anime?
Replies: 114
Views: 41494

Re: Would you watch Katawa Shoujo anime?

And for Rin's arc, I'd go out of my way to mindfuck everyone, splicing in random quick clips of The Wall or slasher film footage or something. Alter the colors a bit each frame. Tilting the angle a bit each frame, drawing each frame increasingly off-model. Maybe make it cut to clay stop-motion anim...
by Dawnstorm
Fri Aug 09, 2013 1:01 am
Forum: Public Discussion
Topic: Would you watch Katawa Shoujo anime?
Replies: 114
Views: 41494

Re: Would you watch Katawa Shoujo anime?

And for Rin's arc, I'd go out of my way to mindfuck everyone, splicing in random quick clips of The Wall or slasher film footage or something. Alter the colors a bit each frame. Tilting the angle a bit each frame, drawing each frame increasingly off-model. Maybe make it cut to clay stop-motion anim...
by Dawnstorm
Fri Aug 09, 2013 12:42 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Meanwhile I wait [Hisao x original character]
Replies: 202
Views: 96071

Re: Meanwhile I wait [Hisao x original character]

This piece suffers extra because of the unconventional delivery. For instance, I assume you didn't mean to write this quote just this way? Because that's the way it visualizes for me. Oh? In the way? You want him to be your father ? I take away your breath and leave your body in this bed, and the f...
by Dawnstorm
Thu Aug 08, 2013 4:53 pm
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Meanwhile I wait [Hisao x original character]
Replies: 202
Views: 96071

Re: Meanwhile I wait [Hisao x original character]

Does that mean you're discontinuing the story and are just posting your remaining notes? Nope; everything's as it's supposed to be (though I admit it could have been better; one of the reason it took me so long to post is that wasn't exactly excited to edit and post this). In print, I'd be playing ...
by Dawnstorm
Thu Aug 08, 2013 1:27 pm
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Meanwhile I wait [Hisao x original character]
Replies: 202
Views: 96071

Re: Meanwhile I wait [Hisao x original character]

For story-post navigation please refer to the index post . Part 3 Confrontations with the Incubus (#3) Always, always you run away. But you cannot run from me, my love. In and out, your breath goes. In and out. You run and run and run. The more you run, the deeper the breath you draw. Very soon now,...
by Dawnstorm
Sun Jul 07, 2013 6:56 pm
Forum: Public Discussion
Topic: Katawa Shoujo Virgin heroine?
Replies: 68
Views: 27299

Re: Katawa Shoujo Virgin heroine?

Virgin Heroine?

EMI!

(I wonder whether the pun is too obscure? Anyway, capitalisation matters. 8) :wink: :oops: )