Search found 13 matches

by Raimen
Wed Jul 31, 2019 3:27 pm
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Aro's Story Thread.
Replies: 10
Views: 575

Re: In Memory of: Lilly

It wasn't the story I was expecting judging form the title, but I enjoyed reading it. At the risk of using a tautology, Lilly and Hanako felt like Lilly and Hanako. I think that putting established characters into new situations and still having those characters feel right is a challenge, and I thin...
by Raimen
Fri May 10, 2019 6:49 pm
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: (Updated 7/28/2019) Pilgrimage - A Subversion of Fate [Divergent Story - No Heart Attack]
Replies: 42
Views: 3058

Re: (Updated 4/15/2019) Pilgrimage - A Subversion of Fate [Divergent Story - No Heart Attack]

I reread chapter 4 and 5, and it took me a while to remember the part that you removed. (The fact that myself and others commented on it helped...) Without knowing your plans, I think it's a good change. Chapters 4 and 5 still flow together quite nicely. And as you've said, you've got some room to g...
by Raimen
Tue Apr 09, 2019 2:33 pm
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: (Updated 7/28/2019) Pilgrimage - A Subversion of Fate [Divergent Story - No Heart Attack]
Replies: 42
Views: 3058

Re: (WIP - Updated 3/25/2019) Pilgrimage - A Subversion of Fate [Divergent Story - Hisao w/o Heart Attack]

I'm also going to picture the nurse as having four arms for the duration of this thread. I am so confused as to why Goro has four arms, but accepted. Pick me! Pick me! I know this one! https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Goro_(Mortal_Kombat) And yes, a small part of my brain thinks about 4 armed Goro whe...
by Raimen
Thu Mar 14, 2019 9:59 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: (Updated 7/28/2019) Pilgrimage - A Subversion of Fate [Divergent Story - No Heart Attack]
Replies: 42
Views: 3058

Re: (WIP - Updated 3/14/2019 TRIPLE POST) Pilgrimage - A Subversion of Fate [Divergent Story - Hisao w/o Heart Attack]

Emi's running chant from Developments is great. I know it's a part of my head canon. I do have a suggestion. The boy that Emi watched die deserves a name to go with his story. She cared for him, and his memory and the events of his passing will be something that Emi would carry to her grave. He shou...
by Raimen
Mon Mar 11, 2019 9:43 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: (Updated 7/28/2019) Pilgrimage - A Subversion of Fate [Divergent Story - No Heart Attack]
Replies: 42
Views: 3058

Re: (WIP - Updated 3/5/2019) Pilgrimage - A Subversion of Fate [Divergent Story - Hisao w/o Heart Attack]

I'm really enjoying this story. I'm curious to see where it goes.
NelNinja wrote:
Tue Mar 05, 2019 3:21 pm
“Good! Don’t get the wrong idea, but spending the night with four beautiful women should help! Wahahahaha~”
Chapter 3 reveals that there were only three beautiful women at karaoke -- Misha, Lilly and Hanako.
by Raimen
Thu Jan 10, 2019 2:58 pm
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Shower Scenes
Replies: 204
Views: 66504

Re: Shower Scenes

Glad people are still enjoying it. Not just that, but some people are writing their own "Shower Scenes" fanfic. OK. Maybe it's just me. I'm 5000 words into a divergent sequel to the "Wait until I see Misha in class..." ending, wondering "what if things didn't go quite as the girls had planned". It'...
by Raimen
Sat Nov 03, 2018 10:57 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Yet Another One-shot Repository (New Entry 12/18/18)
Replies: 90
Views: 19375

Re: Yet Another One-shot Repository (New Entry 10/31/18)

When I first read it, I thought it was a literal hive. Like some kind of crazy horror show or a really bad nightmare. So basically, Kenji. I did notice a typo.. "soldiers dating between chambers" should be "soldiers darting between chambers". Although I guess "dating"also presents possibilities that...
by Raimen
Mon Oct 29, 2018 8:38 pm
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Arrival [updated 10-31-18]
Replies: 22
Views: 2248

Re: Arrival [updated 10-27-18]

You really have to add VAT to the prices on all the goods by yourself? That's true in Canada as well. (Or at least, the places within Canada that I've been.) If you're used to it, it isn't that big a deal. During the 00's, our federal sales tax changed twice in like six years or something. So havin...
by Raimen
Tue Oct 16, 2018 5:31 pm
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Arrival [updated 10-31-18]
Replies: 22
Views: 2248

Re: Arrival

IIRC, Lilly started as a student at Yamaku at the same time as Hanako. However, Lilly lived off-campus until 2nd year, when she moved into the dorm and was assigned the room next to Hanako's. So if you want to write up to the start of Lilly and Hanako's friendship, you'll be writing for a while. I e...
by Raimen
Wed Jul 11, 2018 11:54 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Odd Friendship: A Hanako and Rin Route
Replies: 50
Views: 4591

Re: Odd Friendship: A Hanako and Rin Route

I thought that the ~~~~ Hanako Ikezawa ~~~~ text indicated a scene change, with the potential for a POV change also. (Although IIRC, one of them seened unnecessary for that purpose.) Hopefully there'll be a POV change soon though. I agree that it is kind of annoying. IIRC, this chapter also is the f...
by Raimen
Fri Jun 22, 2018 11:33 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Learning To Fly - A Saki pseudo-route (Updated 11/28)
Replies: 1039
Views: 278699

Re: Learning To Fly - A Saki pseudo-route (Updated 6/22)

I enjoyed this chapter also! Like Hisao, I wasn't expecting his old friends to show up. Or karaoke. I do have a minor nit-pick though... I kind of imagined that the mythical bond of the note-in-locker confession on a snowy day would do a better job of blocking rebounds. Contradicts the KS Prologue. ...
by Raimen
Fri Jun 15, 2018 11:15 am
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: Name Withheld For Spoilers
Replies: 19
Views: 3767

Re: Name Withheld For Spoilers

I'm glad this story got bumped. I know it's barely started, but I enjoyed the premise. To me, it's setting up to be quite different than Numbered Days. So far, it seems only Hisao and the Nurse are aware of the time loop, and how much Hisao remembers from loop to loop seems questionable. Also, I won...
by Raimen
Thu May 17, 2018 1:45 pm
Forum: Fan Fiction
Topic: The Benefit of Hindsight (updated 4/16!)
Replies: 175
Views: 35013

Re: The Benefit of Hindsight (updated 4/16!)

I registered to say that (1) I've really enjoyed this story so far, and (2) to point out the same minor issue many times. It seems that the name of the Student Council President has changed a few times. In 1-4, when he's introduced, he's Shintarou. Mister Front Row Center, as it turns out, is Shinta...