Types of emotional reactions to KS

[Zarys]

It's my first post on this forum, so yeah, HI.

First of all, I'm not the kind of person that often cries, I'm always trying to keep my feelings to myself. The last time i cried was on my friend's funeral a year ago. Since then I've never shed a tear. Until i played KS.
So far I've only played the Lilly's route, and I cried a lot. And by "a lot" I mean A LOT. Every little detail about her, like for example when she wanted Hisao to "see" like she does or when she wanted to "see" what does Hisao look like. All this little details literally brought a tear to my eye. And seeing a person so confident and ambitious even if she's kind of disabled was so touching and it just made me cheerful. I've got the good ending after my first playthrough, and after that I felt happy for them, but at the same moment i felt kind of sad, because i wanted to see more of this story.

I've played a lot of games, read a lot of books and i've never cried that much. KS for me was a great experience and I really regret that i didn't play it earlier.

Welcome! 100% completion is mandatory (there's your "more of the story" ), the fanfiction and artwork thread are available to treat withdrawal symptoms afterward because there will never be a sequel.

I always found the scene where she tries to see what Hisao looks like too cliche to be sad.

Huh ? I have no played the Rin Route.

[LordMarluxia]

I only played two routes. Emi's and Hanako's.

On Emi's my eyes watered. On Hanako's I cried a little. (Saying it was like a little girl is indeed an overstatement.)

However, emotionally I'm a train wreck. I'm feeling depressed and kind of broken... I can't focus on anything. I'm afraid of messing stuff up at work (I work as a marketing and merchandising director, so I have some responsibilities) and getting myself into trouble.

I just can't not think about this.

You know that part at the very begging when Hisao looks at the gate and realizes he is leaving his old life behind, even if he can't do anything to go back.
I am at a similar point in my life.

I can't sleep at night and when I do I wake up drenched in sweat and tearful.
I'm not sure how to react to this...

I have met over the course of my short 22 year life many people with disabilities. And I never knew how to act around them.
After reading this VN, my whole life has been turned upside down. My view on things has been so blatantly challenged and changed that I feel like I am constantly falling into the rabbit hole.

I have been writing an important report while listening to the OST. Some tunes make me hum kind of happily and others just make me freeze in my place paralyzed until they are over and the next track plays.

I am too disturbed to even create content for my gaming channel.
Being slightly disturbed is a constant in my life but never like this.

Even though I'm feeling emotionally shattered, I want to open the game the read the next story.
And at the same time...
When I started the game for the second time (Hanako's route), everything was more or less fine. But then Emi showed up on the corridor. And it was very hard to forget her.
I'm scared of what I may feel when I see Hanako on my next read-through.

I'm sorry for this gargantuan wall of text.
But I needed to let some of it out. My SO doesn't take much interest in VN (she loves reading though) and can face fiction exactly as it is. Fiction. She never connects to the stories and characters on an emotional level so she can't understand what I'm feeling.
Then I found this forum.

To whoever reads this. Thank you.

[Broomhead]

Lord Marluxia: thank you for sharing on the forum. It is a very hard thing to do for some, or sometimes may feel like your only option. Don't worry about the walls of text, my posts often take up a page or a half, so It's fine. Welcome to the forums, may the twin goddesses of Hanako and Emi light your way.

[SpunkySix]

Marluxia, most of us have been there, believe me. You're not alone, and it's good to have you here.

[Zarys]

Marluxia, most of us have been there, believe me. You're not alone, and it's good to have you here.

Sounds like a meeting of Alcoholics Anonymous.

[Broomhead]

"Hi my name is Broomhead"
"Hi BroomHead"
"I've been playing Katawa Shuojo for 2 months..."
Spunky: "Pansy!"
Brythian: "Interesting."
MunchenHausen: "Sealand."
Potato: *Wobbles head back and forth sounding like a mumbling Rin.*
Me: "Whelp, I'm going to be stuck here a while it seems."

[SpunkySix]

I believe this marks the first official meeting of Katawanon.

[Potato]

She never connects to the stories and characters...

So she only ever partakes in really shitty fiction?

[LordMarluxia]

She never connects to the stories and characters...

So she only ever partakes in really shitty fiction?

The interesting part of it all is that she really loves reading love stories and romances. Lately, however, 50 Shades of... type novels is all she reads.
We are reaching on Tuesday 4 years together and I bought her a really nice (and different) book. I think she will like it. I hope.

Thank you all for your words of encouragement.

Also, regarding the AA joke. Isn't this topic supposed to be more or less that?

Also, you all can call me Marly or something. It's what people generally call me on forums.

[Potato]

She never connects to the stories and characters...

So she only ever partakes in really shitty fiction?

The interesting part of it all is that she really loves reading love stories and romances. Lately, however, 50 Shades of... type novels is all she reads.
We are reaching on Tuesday 4 years together and I bought her a really nice (and different) book. I think she will like it. I hope.

Thank you all for your words of encouragement.

Also, regarding the AA joke. Isn't this topic supposed to be more or less that?

Also, you all can call me Marly or something. It's what people generally call me on forums.

I refuse to call you Marly because dead puppies.

Fifty Shades, honestly...Opinions and tastes and all that but anyone who likes Fifty Shades is a bad person until they stop liking it.

[LordMarluxia]

I refuse to call you Marly because dead puppies.

Fifty Shades, honestly...Opinions and tastes and all that but anyone who likes Fifty Shades is a bad person until they stop liking it.

It's okay, Marxs works too
I have yet to understand why she likes that so much.

Actually she is like a human... Fluttershy. (Any bronies here?) Her liking that sort of thing seems a bit out of place. I just know that as soon as that film comes out I'm getting dragged to the cinema by her. Could be worse though.

Fortunately it didn't change her in any way... like I said: she doesn't connect with the stories she reads. But then again... it's 50 Shades. So there is probably very little to connect to.

Back on topic...

How do you hide how you feel? I mean... how do I get over it?
Right now the only thing I want is to dwell deeper into the KS world/community/stuff-in-general but my defense mechanisms are screaming a little bit too loud.
Part of me wants to get the hell away from KS and forget that it exists because of the staggering amount of feels it has inflicted upon me.
Hanako's story actually made me remember things I didn't want to remember (unlike Emi's) so the dose is kind of doubled.

[Broomhead]

Marl, I apologize, I was the one who drew the thread off topic.

Hiding how you feel and such is really up to you. I'm neither a wise man nor a psychologist so all my advice should be taken with a grain of salt.

Conversing with similar ideas as you would in this forum would most likely make you less prone to sudden outbursts of emotions on this topic, as half of the conversations here are deep and emotional for most, while the other half is mostly fun and games with an emotional background. Writing/reading fanfics is another way out of your shell, as it gives you a place to not only further experience the KS world, but also get some closure if you a curious about the end. The devs made a statement about feels from the game in the PSA at the top of the forums (Public Service Announcement - New to the Forums?) that may also help. I can't really say much else, but know that the community is here and willing to support you if you go to the right thread. (Hanako's Broken Heart Club, Here, Crippling Phobias, What scene made you "cry" the most, etc. Just stay on topic and PG-13 for the most part, and you'll be okay.)

[Potato]

Well, the first thing you'll want to do is stop saying "feels". You're a human being with emotions, express them properly.

The second thing you'll want to do is remember all that stuff you don't want to remember. Amnesia is useless. Catharsis is effective.

As for getting over it...Well, that depends on a lot of things. I have far too little information on the variables to even touch that.

[ParagonTerminus]

Ah crap, completely missed the perfect opportunity to make a joking ntroduction about the Waifu War

I TOLD YOU GUYS TO CALL ME WHEN NECESSARY

[LordMarluxia]

Well, the first thing you'll want to do is stop saying "feels". You're a human being with emotions, express them properly.

The second thing you'll want to do is remember all that stuff you don't want to remember. Amnesia is useless. Catharsis is effective.

As for getting over it...Well, that depends on a lot of things. I have far too little information on the variables to even touch that.

I guess you are right. But what is this feeling called? I can't quite pinpoint what it is... I never felt like this before.

Some things... happened long ago, are better left at the back of my mind, where I can't reach them purposely. Those were low points of my childhood and early teenage years where I was mostly one step away from suicide. It's all over now, it can't hurt me anymore. But I'd rather not remember that period of my life.

Ah crap, completely missed the perfect opportunity to make a joking ntroduction about the Waifu War

I TOLD YOU GUYS TO CALL ME WHEN NECESSARY

Well I'm all hears, let's hear about the Waifu War.