Pyrophobia

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Mirage_GSM
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Re: Pyrophobia

Post by Mirage_GSM »

Also it is an unused classroom, so it wouldn't have a carpet.
Not sure what relevance the state of a classroom's usage has to do with carpet. I know that all the classrooms in my highschool bar the science and art/home economics rooms were carpeted; utilised regularly or not.
The emphasis was meant to be on 'classroom' since those are not usually carpeted. Neither are those at Yamaku judging from the available background fotos.
Congrats on being able to attend a luxury school, though ;-)

And Karne, thanks for clarifying. I'll deactivate the plot-hole-detector for the rest of the story.
Emi > Misha > Hanako > Lilly > Rin > Shizune

My collected KS-Fan Fictions: Mirage's Myths
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Karnewarrior
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Re: Pyrophobia

Post by Karnewarrior »

I'd do a table of contents right now, but I don't know how to link individual posts, only pages. :oops:
Not Mine:
A Perfectly Normal High School - Transit eros, philia est sempiternum
Puella Magi Adfligo Systema - "incubators math discard math pets fuzzys Asunaro caw caw"
Mine:
Ikusaba Quest [DR/???] - "In one moment, Earth; in the next, Hell." ~ Queen Sonia Nevermind, on the First Tragedy
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BlackWaltzTheThird
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Re: Pyrophobia

Post by BlackWaltzTheThird »

Mirage_GSM wrote:Congrats on being able to attend a luxury school, though ;-)
"Luxury" would not have been the word with which I would have described it.
Karnewarrior wrote:I don't know how to link individual posts, only pages.
If you click on the post title at the top of each post (for instance, "Re: Pyrophobia" on my post yields http://ks.renai.us/viewtopic.php?f=52&t ... 20#p167720) while in view mode (that is, not reply mode) you'll get redirected to that particular post's URL. Furthermore, when you complete a post and it does that whole "redirecting" thing, it will redirect to the same URL. All you have to do is copy that URL into a link, and BAM you have yourself a contents page. I could help you put one together if you like. Just PM me.
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Karnewarrior
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Re: Pyrophobia

Post by Karnewarrior »

Chapter Four - The Tower of Chains

A great geyser of steam ruptured from underneath the brimstone, spraying superheated rock and droplets of boiling water through the air. Somewhere, a fire crackled, sending chills of terror down Hanako's spine. She gripped her branch ever tighter as she picked her way through the rubble of civilization. She had obviously landed someplace once inhabited, but if there was even the remains of a person in the ruins, Hanako hadn't found any. Only broken stones and shattered glass greeted her. A great cathedral, once proud and mighty, stretching up to touch the very hands of God, lay in ruins, spires toppled, stained glass shattered, statues ripped apart by claws bigger than Hanako's whole arm with such ease that the solid marble may as well have been made of tissue paper.

The geysers were omnipresent, and a danger to anything living. At the moment, that meant only Hanako. She nimbly sidestepped another geyser, a reminder of how she got her branch from the tree - These things didn't care what was above them. It would be blasted apart. They would blast her apart if she let them.

The buildings seemed to be strapped down by huge chains of superheated steel. Here and there they lay forlornly on the ground, holding down only a chunk of brick and mortar, or the wrist of some unfortunate marble statue, now gone. But most of the destruction was not the geyser's work. In fact, Hanako got the impression that the geysers were a result of the decaying town, not the cause. She got that impression from the scortch marks on the walls, ash shadows of screaming residents. She got the impression from the massive gouges tearing through solid stone, punching through aged, hardened oak to reach something that was no longer inside. And some pieces were simply blown away, as if a crash so loud as to dent steel had brought down the mighty walls.

Hanako was resolved to find Lilly, however. Pieces of her screamed to go back home, that it was dangerous here. One insidious part of her mind reminded her of the condescending way Lilly had praised her for simply being around someone new. But Hanako would never leave a friend behind. Not somewhere she would get burnt.

A geyser erupted, sending shattered stone stinging through Hanako's thin school uniform.

Or worse.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Some amount of time later, Hanako finally got a clear view of the only real landmark for miles. A great black tower, with a spire-like top and a single window near the apex, like out of a childs fantasy book, where the princess would hang out, lower her golden hair, and allow Prince Charming into her room. Around the bottom, a bonfire burned eternally, blocking the entrance. But more of note were the things that burned.

The fire licked and crackled around the bones of failed prince charmings, blackening them with soot and ash, the grinning skulls no longer bearing pure skin and fair hair. These prince charmings were now only fuel for the fires locking in their princess. And that was not the only fate that awaited wannabe princes. Above the gigantic, clanking chains holding the tower down unnecessarily to the earth, a dozen or more cages clinked in the wind, like morbid windchimes, and oh, they had their own song too, the pathetic whimpering cries and sobs of prince charmings waiting to join their brothers in the fires below.

Something inside Hanako knew who the princess was. And that same something knew what Hanako would have to do to retrieve the princess, to rescue her from the beast. So it was with the knowledge that surely she would die a most painful death, and that her bones would be added to the kindling at the bottom of the tower, that Hanako skidded down the side of a crater, and resolutely made her way towards the Tower of Chains.

I wanted to write more, but this is starting to lag my computer out, for some reason. It certainly gets the job done, and now that I think about it it's probably for the best; I wouldn't want to bore you with exposition on the landscape Around The Tower.

Once again, Grammatical errors will be corrected and if any plotholes nag you bad enough I'll find some way to handwave them. Karnewarrior is nothing if not humble about his amazing masterpieces of great English literature so don't be afraid to take him down a notch.
Last edited by Karnewarrior on Mon Jun 24, 2013 7:54 am, edited 1 time in total.
Not Mine:
A Perfectly Normal High School - Transit eros, philia est sempiternum
Puella Magi Adfligo Systema - "incubators math discard math pets fuzzys Asunaro caw caw"
Mine:
Ikusaba Quest [DR/???] - "In one moment, Earth; in the next, Hell." ~ Queen Sonia Nevermind, on the First Tragedy
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BlackWaltzTheThird
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Re: Pyrophobia

Post by BlackWaltzTheThird »

I noticed that several words were capitalised outside of the first in a sentence. Of those,
Karnewarrior wrote:the very hands of God...
...allow Prince Charming into her room...
These prince Charmings were now only fuel...
are perfectly okay and are used correctly, though you should fix that P on the last one there. However,
Karnewarrior wrote:A great Cathedral...
She nimbly sidestepped another Geyser...
...These things didn't care...
A Geyser erupted...
...that awaited wannabe Princes.
...rescue her from the Beast.
are not. Only proper nouns should be capitalised; names of a person, place, title, etc. In general, things that when spoken are generally intended to refer to one thing. Such generic things as cathedrals or geysers don't need to be capitalised in this way. In that vein, then generic "prince(s)" or "princess(es)" do not need a capital letter, while "Prince Charming" does. Regarding this "beast", if the phrase is meant to refer to a beast generically, then it oughta be lower case. If this beastie is known by title as "The Beast", however, then capitalise both "the" and "beast".
Karnewarrior wrote:the destruction was not the geysers work
Need an apostrophe at the end of "geysers" for possession.

So anyway, a rather short chapter. I guess I was right about you hinting at another one soon. The start of the chapter mentions a branch; I can't seem to be able to find previous mention of it, so I will assume whichever line was supposed to mention Hanako acquiring it has mysteriously vanished. I like the descriptiveness of the scene, because it certainly gives me a clear mental image on what I'm supposed to be envisioning. Credit where credit is due; that was well done. However, given that that is all that is accomplished, and the short length of the chapter, I can't help but feel it would be better served with whatever happens next paired with it, as with the arcade scene. As it stands it appears as if you're trying to artificially pad out the time between the last demon battle and the next.
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Karnewarrior
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Re: Pyrophobia

Post by Karnewarrior »

BlackWaltzTheThird wrote:*CAPTIALS*

So anyway, a rather short chapter. I guess I was right about you hinting at another one soon. The start of the chapter mentions a branch; I can't seem to be able to find previous mention of it, so I will assume whichever line was supposed to mention Hanako acquiring it has mysteriously vanished. I like the descriptiveness of the scene, because it certainly gives me a clear mental image on what I'm supposed to be envisioning. Credit where credit is due; that was well done. However, given that that is all that is accomplished, and the short length of the chapter, I can't help but feel it would be better served with whatever happens next paired with it, as with the arcade scene. As it stands it appears as if you're trying to artificially pad out the time between the last demon battle and the next.
AH CAPTIAL LETTERS

I have issues with Capitals. They like to Capitalize on their Capabilities and Capitalize random words inside Sentances even When it make no Sense. My pinky finger just loves that shift Key.

Oops. See.

Branch: It's sort of explained later in the chapter where she got it from ( a geyser sprayed under a tree. Now Hanako has a branch that she couldn't have broken off by herself. The tree is gone.). It's supposed to imply a slight passage of time between the end of the last chapter and the start of this one, as is Hanako's standing up and walking off. Things Hanako did that we didn't see: Stand up, Notice Tower, Obtain Branch +1, Set off, scrape knee, cry a little

But it's only been a few minutes. She was fairly close to the Tower to begin with (a little over a mile away, to be precise), and the next Chapter is the interior of the tower and our first significant piece of dialogue that doesn't include the Satin Room, or Silk Room, or whatever kind of soy milk they're selling nowadays. Inkweavers are weird like that.

Shortness: Like I said, There was supposed to be more, mainly Hanako sighting Echo and fighting a few minor Demons of the type that show up every day in a living persons mind. But about halfway through the Chapter you see here, my internet started flipping it's shit like a weasel pancake chef in a webcomic about hardboiled detectives, so it was difficult to forge on. I had to wait about ten seconds every five words, and if I got too far ahead it would just start deleting portions of text, and I would have to go back over.

I promise the next chapter will be longer, and include the stuff I missed this time around. I'll write it in Notepad if I have to.
Not Mine:
A Perfectly Normal High School - Transit eros, philia est sempiternum
Puella Magi Adfligo Systema - "incubators math discard math pets fuzzys Asunaro caw caw"
Mine:
Ikusaba Quest [DR/???] - "In one moment, Earth; in the next, Hell." ~ Queen Sonia Nevermind, on the First Tragedy
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BlackWaltzTheThird
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Re: Pyrophobia

Post by BlackWaltzTheThird »

Karnewarrior wrote:I'll write it in Notepad if I have to.
I would recommend getting into a habit of writing in an external program (Notepad, MS Word, etc) rather than on the forum window. I used to do that when I first started writing, and lost too much stuff too often for it to continue being a viable word processor.
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Karnewarrior
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Re: Pyrophobia

Post by Karnewarrior »

Chapter Five: Past, Present, Future

Thinking ahead. Thinking ahead was important.

You see, if Hanako had thought ahead, she would have realized that getting inside the tower would take her directly through fire. You see, if Hanako had thought ahead, she would have maybe thought to try to find an exit before locking herself into this big stupid adventure. Maybe if she had thought ahead, she wouldn't be stuck between a rock and a hot place right now.

Hanako hated hot places. The reasons were highly visible to anyone and everyone.

But the slavering group of half-formed beasts and fetid monstrosities behind her was pressing. They crawled forward like a horde of legless zombies, by arm and tentacle, even by some sort of distorted, flipped jawbone that could never have worked in anything but a dream. They reached out with serrated fingernails of rusted steel and with cool ceramic hands itching for a throat to squeeze. One simply licked everything, trailing some sort of acidic slime that hissed and bubbled and melted everything into liquid.

To be completely honest, Hanako was debating jumping into the throng to be eaten alive. At least she wouldn't have to deal with pain and bad memories. And, thought a dark part of her mind, she probably tasted like bacon anyway.

Something about that offended her. She wasn't some morsel on a plate, to be poked and prodded and gnawed upon like jerky. She took a step back and readied the branch. If she was to go, she'd go down fighting. She would die with more dignity than a piece of bacon. It was the same determination that had kept her from suicide watch in the burn ward, the orphanage, and her first years at Yamaku before finding Lilly.

The monsters got closer, and suddenly being a coward seemed like a very good idea. She took a step back, away from the advancing horde she wasn't even sure she could kill. Even if the fire was only a few feet thick, the thick oak doors of the Tower of Chains were shut tight, and standing in the fire tugging at metal handles was... Previous experiences made it clear that was a unsatisfactory response to a fire.

The horde grew ever closer, and Hanako's heart beat ever faster. Trapped trapped trapped! Nowhere to run...

A great echoing cry rang out, and with a shower of tiles a shadow launched itself from the roof. Like a dragon the size of Yamaku's main building, but with three writhing snakelike heads and feathered wings it flew, circling around to pass low over the minor Demons. With a crash, it smashed into the crowded shadows and began ripping into them like a feral beast, inhaling blood and entrails alike. Within seconds, twenty of the monsters were residing in the beasts' gullet, with three more on the ride to join them; or at least, parts of them.

Hanako no longer wanted anything to do with the bloodbath occurring mere meters away from her. Already her face was flecked with spots of red, and her clothes with droplets of that green acid.

Turning one last time, praying for a miracle, she looked toward the door, for any path, any way away from the beast. But as it turned out, the miracle had been in her hand the whole time.

Swiping the stick from side to side, Hanako scattered the burning skeletons, trying to ignore the screams of terror from both behind her and inside her. One of the monsters, a froglike gremlin of some sort, was in such a rush to get away from the terrible beast that it ran into the fire proper, and smashed against the wall before screeching in agony.

Hanako almost forgot to swipe the stick and forge forward, so entranced was she with the horror, watching the gremlin writhe as its skin peeled from bone, as its lungs filled with smoke and it began to cough through the screams. It melted, alive, and aware through the whole process, the hot fire turning it from living thing into bubbling fat and charred ash. The end product was like the remains of a used-up candle, still crackling.

It was only when a ashen arm fell off, and broke into cinders, that Hanako could tear her gaze away, and by then, the sounds of guzzling had begun to die. There was not much time, and if Hanako wanted to escape, she would need to get inside the tower.

The door was close enough to touch, but after the Gremlin, Hanako didn't feel safe. Two swipes later, something hissed very close behind her and safety didn't matter any more. She leapt forward, grabbed the oddly cold handle, and swung through the door. The beast behind her smashed against the solid oak, roaring in defiance of the steadfast wood. There was a scraping sound, like something was dragging its teeth across the door as if trying to bite it, and then speech.

Three voices spoke, not quite in unison, causing a echo effect that made Hanako's head hurt. “You! You, the deceiver! You're here to take her from ECHO, aren't you?! AREN'T YOU?! YOU CAN'T HAVE HER, YOU BITCH!” There was a sudden change of tone, and voice. The echo effect was gone, and instead there was a lyrical voice Hanako had only heard once or twice through fuzzy phone lines and tinny speakers.

“Lilly, sweetie, don't listen to the bad girl. Mommy loves you! She's going to be in there soon, promise! You'll be safe!” There was a beat of wings outside the door, so strong that they rattled in the doorjamb.

Something poked Hanako in the leg. She turned just in time to see a small girl backtrack quicker than she had thought possible, and hold her cane out defensively, waving it back and forth. She was wearing a pink little summer dress, and her hair was shorn short, but it was obvious who it was, even if Hanako had never seen the old family photo.

“Lilly.” Hanako whispered.

I think I shall split this up into another chapter, as it's growing larger than expected. So bad news and good news:

Bad News: It's going to be a bit of dialogue before we get to any significant action, especially before we get to the fight with ECHO.

Good news: I just saved a bunch of money on car insurance by switching to Geico.






I'm just kidding, I don't have Geico.
Last edited by Karnewarrior on Sun Jul 28, 2013 5:15 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Not Mine:
A Perfectly Normal High School - Transit eros, philia est sempiternum
Puella Magi Adfligo Systema - "incubators math discard math pets fuzzys Asunaro caw caw"
Mine:
Ikusaba Quest [DR/???] - "In one moment, Earth; in the next, Hell." ~ Queen Sonia Nevermind, on the First Tragedy
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griffon8
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Re: Pyrophobia

Post by griffon8 »

Knowing this is all just a bit of a fun romp and that I shouldn't take it too seriously, this is enjoyable.
Karnewarrior wrote:At least she wouldn't have to deal with bad memories and pain.
I would think those two should be reversed. Dying from the monsters would have pain. The fire would have pain and bad memories.
I found out about Katawa Shoujo through the forums of Misfile. There, I am the editor of Misfiled Dreams.

Completed: 100%, including bonus picture. Shizune>Emi>Lilly>Hanako>Rin

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Karnewarrior
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Re: Pyrophobia

Post by Karnewarrior »

Memories

"Lilly..." Hanako whispered.

The little girls nose wrinkled with confusion. "How do you know my name?" She took another step back, away from Hanako's voice.

"L-Lilly, i-it's me," Murmured Hanako. Lilly didn't respond, too deep in thought.

"You sound familiar." She said with finality. "Stay here, Bad Lady." And with that, she turned and dashed back through the tower, vanishing around a corner. Without thinking, Hanako took pursuit, following her through another thick oak doorway into a long, curling stairwell leading higher into the tower. The walls were covered in pitch black photographs of nothing, rustling in the oddly moving air of the strange realm.

Hanako paused to stare in confusion at the black squares. Reaching out on instinct, she brushed one with the back of her bad hand, and immediately reeled back as a wall of scent and texture overcame her. The soft memory of a warm mothers embrace, the sound of a Scottish brogue Hanako had no chance of understanding, the scent of freshly baked cookies, and the elation that followed, all hit her at once.

With a shock, she realized that these photographs were hardly blank at all, they were memories from Lilly's childhood. Thus prepared, she brushed another, and another rush of sensation poured into her; a memory of a bedtime story, told in English, with no visual input at all.

She looked up the stairway with awe at the sheer number of memories it contained. They lined the walls from top to bottom, continuing up the stairway until they curved out of sight. Dashing up the stairs, Hanako saw more and more memories, black tiles of non-visual perception. It would make sense, of course, that the blind Lilly would have no visual memories.

As she progressed, Hanako made it a point to brush the memories that passed. It felt intrusive and invasive to her friends privacy, but her curiosity got the better of her. Here and there was a doorway, but upon opening it up all Hanako saw were blank rooms lined with memories. Gradually, she realized that the memories were lined up chronologically, with the memories higher up the staircase coming later in life.

A birthday, hot scones, A first day of school.

A first crush, the resolution, the childish heartbreak.

A soft conversation, a sense of dread, the sound of airplane engines.

A sharp sense of loneliness, self-blame, Akira's voice piercing through the dark thoughts.

Cooking, a strict Catholic school, the rumble of a moving van.

And so it was not surprising when the next memories included her own voice, heard through someone elses ears. It was not a surprise when she touched the memory of Lilly's motherly feelings toward her, the damn sense of protectiveness Hanako hated. But what surprised her was how much Lilly had leaned on her over the short time they knew each other.

From Hanako's vantage point, she had relied on Lilly for everything. But from Lilly's standing, it was the other way around.

The memories showed a different perspective, one with the whole picture. Suddenly, every surprise tea party, every little gift, everything Hanako had thought Lilly had done to try to help her fragile little china doll; It was just to feel reassured by Hanako's appreciation, appreciation that half the time had been false.

Every time Lilly had been feeling alone, feeling useless, she want to Hanako. Hanako hadn't even known Lilly ever felt that way before, and now she was told through no uncertain terms that Lilly felt almost as abandoned as she did, just as lonely. She wasn't popular. None of her friends ever talked just to talk. It was always questions about the next test time, about how to do something. The princess act was just that. An act put on by a scared little girl with no friends.

No friends except for Hanako. The realization sent tears rushing to Hanako's eyes, making the wall of black and white shake and swirl. It felt... It felt horrible, to know how much Lilly depended on Hanako, when Hanako let her down by letting her come here. Wherever here was.

Her progress up the tower slowed considerably, but it mattered little. She hadn't caught up to Lilly, but she could feel the distance below her feet. She was almost at the top of the tower.

Another door. This one was different however, made out of padded silk cushions. It seemed to waver slightly without actually doing so, as if it weren't fully part of the same world as the space around it.

Feeling a sense of trepidation, Hanako pushed the door open.

Thanks, Griffon. Fixing that now.
Not Mine:
A Perfectly Normal High School - Transit eros, philia est sempiternum
Puella Magi Adfligo Systema - "incubators math discard math pets fuzzys Asunaro caw caw"
Mine:
Ikusaba Quest [DR/???] - "In one moment, Earth; in the next, Hell." ~ Queen Sonia Nevermind, on the First Tragedy
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Karnewarrior
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Re: Pyrophobia

Post by Karnewarrior »

The room had changed. Delicate silk wafted in a gentle breeze through the windows of a train car, making the sheer curtains look like red ghosts against the blue mist.

Inkweaver and Kasuga looked up in unison as Hanako entered, Inkweaver smiling a frightening, out-of-place smile much like the one Mutou rarely showed his students. Kasuga smiled sweetly and bowed her head in greeting.

“Welcome back.” She said. Inkweaver gestured to a small mini-fridge, draped in silken fabrics.

“Would you like some soy milk? I can't stand the stuff personally, but Osaka insisted.” Kasuga nodded.

“Ah thought it would help keep your 'Verse from gettin' messed up, considerin' we aint really supposed to be messin' around in here.”

“Too much information, my dear.” Said Inkweaver gently, before Hanako could react. Kasuga looked ashamed. “Regardless, how can we help you today, Miss Ikazawa?”

Hanako thought for a moment. “W-Where are we?” Was the first question that came to mind. Inkweaver pursed his lips and thought for a moment.

“Three places.” He said at last. “The first is the unused classroom you and Lilly use for tea every day. While the you that is you is here, that you is currently an empty shell, waiting for your soul to return to it. It's completely without presence, and so no-one who isn't looking for it should find it, even if it were right in front of them.

“The second place is the Tower of Chains. It doesn't exist, and yet it does. A fabrication of the mind, created by a small dose of otherworldly power. One you received the first time you set foot in the Satin Room. Or Silk Room, as it is now.” He chuckled slightly, hiding his smile behind one hand. “The land and the demons within are manifestations of the fears and memories of the occupant. When they are destroyed, so too are the floodgates of fear closed, and the Enemy once more thwarted.”

“The Enemy?” Hanako asked, but Inkweaver ignored her.

“And this, my dear, is a hole between the worlds. A rift. And a doorway.” He stepped aside, smiling widely, and gestured to the door beyond him. “When you are done, you will pass through that door. And I have no doubt you will see the other side of that door.” His smile vanished, and he looked slightly tired. “There is work to do yet, however. The Enemy does not rest. He has no need to.”

Kasuga looked concerned, and seemed about to reach out to him, but thought better of it. Instead she turned to Hanako. “Any more questions?”

Hanako shook her head, but Kasuga lifted a hand. “Y’all got one more. Ah can feel it. It's about the sword, ain't it?” Hanako's eyes widened. That's right, the sword that had taken down JUDAS. How did Kasuga know about that.


“Can ah see it?” She asked, her heavy accent not entirely hiding her curiosity. Hanako shook her head again, awkwardly flattening her hair over her bad side.

“I don't h-have a... s-sword.” She stammered.

“Search yourself. I think you'll be surprised what you find.” Murmured Inkweaver, looking just slightly upward, his brow casting his eyes into shadow. The room suddenly felt abuzz with anticipation.

Hanako took a trembling step backward. “I-I don't know w-what you mean...”

“Find the blade, Ikezawa.”

“I-I don't...” Inkweaver looked incredibly frightening suddenly. His eyes pinpricks of reflected light in the dark shadows. Kasuga watched expressionlessly.

“Find the blade.” Inkweaver said again, his voice ice-cold. The train car shuddered.

“I-It's not...” She didn't have it! It disappeared after she fought JUDAS!

“Find it!” Inkweaver's voice cracked like thunder, sending Hanako stumbling against the smooth wall behind her. The door back to the Tower was gone. “Let us see your resolve, little Hare!”

“I-I can't...” Hanako choked out, crawling into a corner and staring up at the now standing Inkweaver. Somehow, the space around him shook with momentous power.

“I know exactly what you can do, Ikezawa. SHOW ME THE SWORD!” He roared. There was a sound of shattering glass, as the windows of the train broke. Yet instead of going outside, they flew inwards, imploding with the unnatural power of Inkweaver's voice.

“I DON'T HAVE IT!” Hanako screamed back, pushed into a corner where the only way out was to fight back. Her hand swept out in a slap, trying to force this terrible power away, but she found herself swinging a ruby hilt instead of an empty palm.

The train car grew very still, as Hanako stared blankly at the ruby hilt in her hands. Inkweaver was suddenly exactly as he had been, smiling his slightly-off smile and his eyes twinkling with delight. With a start, Hanako realized that not only had the room stopped vibrating, the windows were fixed, The door to the Tower reappeared, and Inkweaver was sitting serenely on his couch on the side of the car. Kasuga looked proud, for some reason, and smiled as well.

“Resolve.” Said Inkweaver softly, after almost a full minute had passed in silence. “It's the best weapon you have against the enemies you will face shortly. One can have all the strength of arm in the world, all the magical ability of a master arch-magi, all the guile and cunning of a skilled thief, and all the divine power of a god. But without a certain amount of Resolve, they will accomplish nothing.

“And yet, Miss Ikezawa, if any of them were transported into your position, they would surely die. I have seen great warriors, heroes of old legends, fall before the type of demons you face, and will face, with regularity. If you ever thought that you were weak, useless, or broken, know this; you are one of the strongest people I've ever seen. To have your Resolve develop so early, is most astounding.”

His face faltered for a moment. “But it may not be enough. Your Resolve is not yet whole. You are not fully Resolved to bring down our mutual Enemy.”

Kasuga spoke up then. “Your Resolve will grow over time, as you use it. You must face both your fears and the demons of others to make it into something powerful enough to bring Him down.”

“You have already defeated the Demon of Betrayal. May I see your Resolve?” Asked the Inkweaver. A short-legged table appeared in the center of the room. Strange runes covered its outside, but a few recognizable ones circled the inner portion. One lit up brightly. The words BETRAYAL and JUDAS burned hot on the table.

Cautiously, Hanako laid the Ruby Hilt in the very center of the table. There was a quiet rumble, so soft she almost didn't hear it. Her Resolve rattled on the table, lifting up into the air. Inkweaver raised his hands towards the blade.

“The Demon of Betrayal was vanquished, and with him your fear of being turned upon by those close to you. In response to the absence of this fear, your resolve is strengthened. In the absence of this fear, your trust in your friends grows, a first step on a journey undertaken boldly, and with great courage. O Resolve, Blade of the Hare, temper yourself in the newborn Trust, and be reborn stronger.

“Betrayal into Trust! Harden, O Resolve!” Resolve flashed brightly, and spun itself into a dizzying blur. There was a short chime, and then the blade froze, and softly lowered itself onto the table.

It was longer, now, the blade itself stretching a extra few centimeters away from the hilt. Rather than being a largely useless cudgel, the Ruby blade was an actual blade, shattered and worn though it may have looked.

Hanako picked up her Resolve. It felt as light as a feather, and she knew it was sharper than any forged steel. She looked up wordlessly at Inkweaver, who tilted his head towards the door.

There was no need for goodbyes. But there was one last question that tugged at Hanako's mind as she reached for the door handle. “W-Who is the Enemy?”

It was Kasuga who answered. “You'll find out soon. The journey is long, but there are few steps. If you have the courage to leap, He will find you. And you will destroy Him.”

It was obvious Hanako wasn't going to extract anything more from the two strange people. So instead, she nodded and stepped through the door.

Her Resolve went with her. It was always on hand. Always.
Last edited by Karnewarrior on Mon Jul 29, 2013 10:57 am, edited 1 time in total.
Not Mine:
A Perfectly Normal High School - Transit eros, philia est sempiternum
Puella Magi Adfligo Systema - "incubators math discard math pets fuzzys Asunaro caw caw"
Mine:
Ikusaba Quest [DR/???] - "In one moment, Earth; in the next, Hell." ~ Queen Sonia Nevermind, on the First Tragedy
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Mirage_GSM
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Re: Pyrophobia

Post by Mirage_GSM »

And that's a side of Igor we didn't see in Persona...

Your writing did improve since the first chapters. Looking forward to the next.
Emi > Misha > Hanako > Lilly > Rin > Shizune

My collected KS-Fan Fictions: Mirage's Myths
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BlackWaltzTheThird
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Re: Pyrophobia

Post by BlackWaltzTheThird »

Quite curious. I saw this had updated yesterday and wondered why the update was so short. I declined to post then, and now that I come back to it I see that the update was short because it was the first of two parts. I'm guessing the next chapter will be another "boss battle" as it were, so this is a lovely setup for it. It seems that Hanako's resolve has been personified as the sword, and as such the sword has had the name, Resolve, conferred upon it. In that case, I'll not comment on the frequent capitalisation of the word. However, I will point out that Hanako's surname is "Ikezawa" with an "e", not "Ikazawa".
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Karnewarrior
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Joined: Tue Feb 26, 2013 10:04 pm

Re: Pyrophobia

Post by Karnewarrior »

BlackWaltzTheThird wrote:Quite curious. I saw this had updated yesterday and wondered why the update was so short. I declined to post then, and now that I come back to it I see that the update was short because it was the first of two parts. I'm guessing the next chapter will be another "boss battle" as it were, so this is a lovely setup for it. It seems that Hanako's resolve has been personified as the sword, and as such the sword has had the name, Resolve, conferred upon it. In that case, I'll not comment on the frequent capitalisation of the word. However, I will point out that Hanako's surname is "Ikezawa" with an "e", not "Ikazawa".
Should be fixed now. I feel kind of embarrassed, considering I just read Hanako's route a little while ago. It's probably because I mispronounce her name as Ikazawa, rather than Ikezawa. Weird names are weird.

I'll have to check the ToC at the start of the thread to see if I planned for any discussion between Hanako and Lilly before ECHO shows up, but I kind of want to do the boss battle soon as well. The issue is that I tend to rush things a bit and end up skipping details that are important later on, only to find that several chapters in I say something I thought I told you but never really did, and then people get confused.

Please tell me if it starts to feel like I'm overcompensating. I'm planning for a couple filler trips through the "real" world to both slow down the narrative and to kind of accentuate Hanako's growth. Since she's defeated JUDAS, Demon of Betrayal, she can trust people now, so the Hanako we have now is closer to the good ending Hanako than the chronologically "correct" Hanako. And Since ECHO is demon of Solitude, defeating her should let Hanako make new friends. Trust and Friendship, then I think something along the lines of Acceptance for IZUNAMI and Courage for JANUS.

The next chapter should include some amount of combat, at least. But for today, I have to eat and go to class. We have a blues inspection today, so I have to look sharp in uniform.
Not Mine:
A Perfectly Normal High School - Transit eros, philia est sempiternum
Puella Magi Adfligo Systema - "incubators math discard math pets fuzzys Asunaro caw caw"
Mine:
Ikusaba Quest [DR/???] - "In one moment, Earth; in the next, Hell." ~ Queen Sonia Nevermind, on the First Tragedy
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Karnewarrior
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Re: Pyrophobia

Post by Karnewarrior »

Chapter Eight: ECHO, Demon of Solitude

Hanako pushed open the heavy wooden doors to the top-most room of the Tower of Chains. They slid open with ominous creaks, the heavy, aged oak pressing downward with incredible force.

The room inside was decorated with hanging sheets of sheer pink and yellow cloth. A bed sat gathering dust in a corner, flanked on both sides by ornate mahogany nightstands and fine chinaware lamps. Like Lilly's room in Yamaku, the walls were lined with books in braille, organized in some unknown fashion. The towers leaned and tilted, which looked as though the books had been haphazardly tossed there, but Hanako knew through experience was one of Lilly's techniques for telling which book was which without having to drag a finger along each set of braille.

A great window covered one side of the arching walls, with two clear glass doors inset to look like part of the window. It led to a giant balcony, as wide as a soccer field, edged with engraved parapets and ringed by a set of upward steps that made the center look like a depression rather than the edge a raised area. Two pairs of giant arches marked each side of the balcony, covered in arcane runes. If Hanako had deigned to look down from the farthest portion of the balcony, she would have seen the final portal, arching sideways from the stone parapet.

As Hanako stepped out onto the balcony, a warm breeze softly rustled her hair, and brought with it the scent of burning flesh. It also brought with it a voice... One that made Hanako choke back sobs just hearing it.

“Hanako?! Is that you?!” from the sound of it, Lilly had lost all bearing, and that disturbed Hanako more than anything. Finding the source of that shout was simple, for her cage hung directly beside the edge of the parapet.

“Lilly!” Hanako cried, reaching for the cage, but it was too far. Besides, the great padlock holding the door would be too strong to break. “I'm going to get you out of here!”

“I'm going to get you out of here, honey, I promise,” Panted Hanako's mother, snatching the little girl up and running towards the back door. But a pile of burning debris fell, knocking Hanako out of her mothers hands, and blocking the only escape route left. They were trapped.

Hanako shook the memories from her head. Now wasn't the time to get lost in the past. She shook her head again, confused. The memory had been snatched away, and now she couldn't remember what she had been remembering...

“Hanako, run, I don't know what this thing is but-”

“THIEF!” ECHO smashed down onto the parapet. Great, leathery wings took the place of forelegs, her back legs scaled and rippling with massive muscles. Her three heads all focused in on Hanako, the enigmatic faces of the Demon of Solitude covered by white porcelain theater masks. One smiled in unnerving happiness, one weeping as if forced into servitude by the other.

But the one that caught Hanako's eye was surely the “main” head of ECHO. The mask was flat and expressionless. Sickly yellow eyes glared out from behind it, and it stared at her more intently, with more hatred, and more calm, collected fury.

Hanako timidly put Resolve into what she hoped was an acceptable guard. Maybe she should have tried to join the Kendo Club...

ECHO didn't move though, besides shaking in anger. “Why? Why do you want to take my Lilly? She's /mine/!”

“I-I can't... I can't leave her here! This isn't R-right...”

ECHO seemed to slump over. “Don't leave us alone again. Please.”

But in the next millisecond, ECHO had snapped two of her heads up, loosing a shrill scream that made Hanako almost drop Resolve to clutch at her ears. The sheer forces of it drove her back, and sent Lilly's cage swinging as if in a gale.

Lilly clutched tight to the bars, eyes shut tight in fear, hand groping for her necklace while she whispered a prayer.

Tensing, ECHO launched her massive frame into the air in gusts of buffeting wind. Lilly's cage rocked violently back and forth, the nails holding it to the stone wall creaking.

“S-Stay away f-from my friends...” Murmured Hanako. Resolve hummed lightly, barely audible over the ringing in Hanako's ears after ECHO's blast.

ECHO didn't listen, swirling around in the air like a dragon and flying straight for Lilly's cage.

“I said, STAY AWAY!” Hanako shouted, running towards the edge. Her foot planted on the wall, vaulting over the edge of the parapet, and in a explosion of ruby she launched herself through the air like a bullet towards ECHO. Resolve sliced downward, smashing against ECHO's scaly form like a warhammer, but cutting no flesh.

Regardless, ECHO fell back through the air, Hanako riding her belly. A head dipped in from the left, but Resolve caught it in a upward spin, and Hanako danced to the side, letting it slip past. Again, resolve bounced off of her iron scales.

ECHO smashed into the ground, throwing Hanako wide. Hanako scrambled to her feet, quickly assessing the situation, fear vanished in a haze of adrenaline. She barely noticed the minor Demons crawling in like a macabre circus of freaks.

She sliced the acid tongue off of one that got in her way as she ran at ECHO, rolling nimbly over another tiny goblin, sweeping Resolve under its legs and severing the hamstrings. ECHO loosed another shout, but Hanako threw up Resolve, which hummed louder, dissipating the sonic shockwave.

Another burst of ruby crystal sent Hanako flying right into ECHO's left side, Resolve slashing downward. Instead of hitting the side of ECHO's mammoth neck, however, the blade smashed directly into the ceramic mask in front – and it shattered.

The face underneath was disturbingly human, but twisted into a horrible, almost cartoonish version of despair. It screeched like nails on a chalkboard as the face boiled and melted like wax. All the way back it melted, into the body, until all that remained was a dripping stump of colored wax.

Another giant gust of wind as ECHO launched herself into the air. “BURNED US! SHE BURNED US! WICKED, WICKED THIEF OF A GIRL!”

Hanako arose from a molten pile of wax, breath heavy. Tiny fires lit in her wake, but no heat touched her. “Can't say I d-didn't warn you.” She muttered, mostly to herself.

Echo cried out from in the air, and Hanako snapped back into her martial trance. She turned to meet the spiraling beast, as Echo swept low to claw at her. Hanako leapt up, higher than she had ever thought she could go, and Resolve ripped into ECHO's wing.

ECHO crashed to ground, her wing in useless tatters. She cried out again, a bestial roar. A faint crackle was Hanako's only warning as ECHO unleashed a new burst of sonic shock waves, now firing like a machine gun. Hanako was unprepared, blown back into the solid stone of a building... and through! Heavy bricks fell on her, bruising and battering her thin form.

But she was not beaten. She arose from the bricks again. ECHO snarled as she stepped out of the wreckage of what had once been a house. It seemed that Lilly's mind had stored her memories in there too, if the black photographs swirling about her feet like snow were to be believed.

Charging again, Hanako blew aside the sonic assault, closing the distance with ECHO. Resolve slashed up, but ECHO drew back her smiling head, and the blade went wide of the ceramic. The main head dipped around, wrapping the neck around Hanako.

A huge gust of wind lifted both ECHO and the struggling Hanako into the air, but ECHO's tattered wing couldn't hold, and she dropped back down. Hanako was crushed underneath ECHO's massive form, struggling for breath as ECHO tried to regain her footing. But breath wasn't as important as a brief opportunity provided to her, and Resolve dipped up to pop the mask off of the smiling head of ECHO.

A scream, and the wax dissolved right on top of Hanako. She cried out in pain as the burning hot wax seared her skin, but she had taken ECHO's last vulnerability. The main head was the only one left. And ECHO was obviously feeling the pain.

As she stood from the cooling wax once again, Hanako looked up.

Lilly's cage was glowing a bright gold. As Hanako watched, the clouds above parted, and a brilliant shaft of golden light lanced down directly on top of Hanako. Violet hair shimmering, Hanako felt herself invigorated by the light, and grinned. Her bruises healed, cuts sealed, and all the aches and pains of the last few days vanished.

“Go!” Cried Lilly. And indeed, ECHO was writhing weakly on her back. One wing in tatters, a bleached-white bone sticking from a deep gash in her leg, she shivered as if cold.

Hanako hopped up on top and walked down her body until the final head was in range. “You know, I thought I was broken because I was all alone once. But you showed me something. It wasn't me being alone that broke me. It was thinking that being alone made me some kind of monster. Some people are just loners. Solitude isn't some virus, some sickness I had. It was me. And that was beautiful.”

Driving Resolve downward, Hanako sliced through the soft underscales of ECHO's throat and up through her face, smashing the ceramic.

ECHO screamed a gurgling scream clogged by her own blood as her whole body turned to boiling wax. Hanako jumped off of the beast before she was drawn into the morass, and looked upward.

Lilly was falling from the sky, but right before she hit the ground, a burst of bright gold caught her and she landed as daintily as a princess. Her cane snapped out, now made of brilliantly cut beryl, and she found her ponderous way over to Hanako.

Smiling softly, she said, “My hero.” Hanako blushed violently.

“I-I didn't want... I-I didn't want you to get h-hurt because of me.”

“And so you fought so impressively, that a blind princess could see the action from atop her tower. You rescued a damsel in distress... Speaking of which, I think you earned a kiss...” Lilly smirked.

Hanako tried to back away, trying to explain how she loved Lilly but as a sister, before Lilly planted a soft kiss on her forehead. Then she fell forward, as though exhausted, and they silently hugged for the longest while.

“Seriously...” Whispered Lilly, her voice suddenly hoarse and tired. “Thank you Hanako. You have no idea how much this means to me.”

Hanako just hugged her harder, until the flagstones under her feet turned into soft carpeting, until the dim twilight of the land around the Tower of Chains turned into the natural orange of sunset. Until finally, Hanako and Lilly were home.

But when she stepped back, Lilly was gone.
Not Mine:
A Perfectly Normal High School - Transit eros, philia est sempiternum
Puella Magi Adfligo Systema - "incubators math discard math pets fuzzys Asunaro caw caw"
Mine:
Ikusaba Quest [DR/???] - "In one moment, Earth; in the next, Hell." ~ Queen Sonia Nevermind, on the First Tragedy
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