Search found 49 matches
- Fri Jul 20, 2018 9:18 am
- Forum: Fan Fiction
- Topic: Odd Friendship: A Hanako and Rin Route
- Replies: 50
- Views: 22528
Re: Odd Friendship: A Hanako and Rin Route
Carrie. The shout-out is to Carrie. NOW GIMME A COOKIE! I'll be interested to see how you present things from Rin's PoV in the next chapter. ------ Hmm... We have now two stories about Hanako running at the same time, and in both Hanako seems to be missing her most defining character trait completel...
- Tue Jul 17, 2018 9:25 am
- Forum: Fan Fiction
- Topic: An Unexpected Visitor
- Replies: 8
- Views: 4236
Re: An Unexpected Visitor
This was an enjoyable read.
I agree somewhat about Rin's blunt manner becoming caricature-like. Recall from the VN that Hisao had to offer her help to her vague "problem" several times before she admitted she needed a new tampon. She does have something resembling embarrassment.
I agree somewhat about Rin's blunt manner becoming caricature-like. Recall from the VN that Hisao had to offer her help to her vague "problem" several times before she admitted she needed a new tampon. She does have something resembling embarrassment.
- Mon Jul 16, 2018 9:48 pm
- Forum: Fan Fiction
- Topic: An Unusual Friendship (Misha x Hanako; Complete)
- Replies: 143
- Views: 127197
Re: An Unusual Friendship (Misha x Hanako)
I agree with Mirage's point. The whole part with Miki felt jarring and out of place. I don't know that it's an issue or OOC necessarily, but something's off about it. Maybe the flow? Not sure. Little too 'in your face' maybe? A lot of my scenes are like that on the first draft and I have writer's bl...
- Fri Jul 13, 2018 7:36 am
- Forum: Fan Fiction
- Topic: Odd Friendship: A Hanako and Rin Route
- Replies: 50
- Views: 22528
Re: Odd Friendship: A Hanako and Rin Route
Decided to re-write parts of Chapter 1 and 2 so I'm not blatantly ripping lines from the game. Good idea. Make it your own and really experiment with it. That's the part that makes these AUs fun, anything can happen (within reason). You might also consider having the relationship start off rocky. W...
- Thu Jul 12, 2018 9:15 am
- Forum: Fan Fiction
- Topic: Yuuko Pseudo-route: Can You Read Me?
- Replies: 14
- Views: 13729
Re: Yuuko Pseudo-route: Can You Read Me?
What I like about this, compared to other older women pseudo-routes... which is basically just Akira, is that there's nothing pathetic about Hisao. He hasn't failed anything, and appears to be spending time as a friend with all the girls. I suspect that's due to basically following the Hanako path i...
- Thu Jul 12, 2018 9:02 am
- Forum: Fan Fiction
- Topic: An Unusual Friendship (Misha x Hanako; Complete)
- Replies: 143
- Views: 127197
Re: An Unusual Friendship (Misha x Hanako)
I like this a lot. And it's interesting to hear about Hisao's actions, but not actually see him. It's good to see Hanako growing on her own as a person and embracing a more open attitude, even if she's still hesitant and skittish.
- Wed Jun 27, 2018 5:35 pm
- Forum: Fan Fiction
- Topic: A Day In the Life
- Replies: 14
- Views: 5456
Re: A Day In the Life
I enjoyed it. It was short and sweet and engaging (which is cool given that cast is pure OCs, which I tend not to care about). Well done.
- Wed May 23, 2018 11:15 pm
- Forum: Fan Fiction
- Topic: Ascent: An Emilogue (Erotic Content)
- Replies: 91
- Views: 110610
Re: Ascent: An Emilogue (Erotic Content)
I found this to be an enjoyable read. Was kinda slow in hooking me at the beginning, but once they were out and about on the mountain it became really engaging. And major kudos on the bad ending, it was real tearjerker.
- Sun May 20, 2018 4:12 am
- Forum: Fan Fiction
- Topic: "Can you see past the past?" -- Updated (7/11)
- Replies: 37
- Views: 18606
Re: "Can you move past the past?" -- Updated (7/11)
I liked this a lot, which is saying something since almost everyone is an OC which is usually a major turn-off.
- Wed May 16, 2018 12:55 am
- Forum: Fan Fiction
- Topic: Within a Looking Glass – A Rika pseudo-route
- Replies: 112
- Views: 49409
Re: Within a Looking Glass – A Rika pseudo-route
Looking over the graves I muse when I see a familiar name. I wonder if that’s a relative of Emi’s. Anyways, not who we are looking for. That's a clever little shout-out. ------ I really enjoyed this and I'm glad you got to the end with it, extra kudos for doing it so quickly. It was the first non-n...
- Fri May 04, 2018 10:04 pm
- Forum: Fan Fiction
- Topic: Developments (Post-Lilly NE) [Complete, 2015-08-11]
- Replies: 1562
- Views: 756103
Re: Developments (Post-Lilly NE) [Complete, 2015-08-11]
This was fantastic and I don’t think I give due credit in this review. The character development, the world-building, the sheer scale of this thing and how engaging each chapter was… a masterpiece. The ups and downs took me on an emotional rollercoaster that left me quite depressed (which is pretty ...
- Wed May 02, 2018 10:35 pm
- Forum: Fan Fiction
- Topic: Butterflies and Ice Cream
- Replies: 28
- Views: 18109
Re: Butterflies and Ice Cream
I liked this a lot. I find Rin works best when it's her perspective and isn't a romance with Hisao. Though that might be because I've never really read a Rin/Hisao fic and found the Rin path to be... boring? Not sure if that's the right word, but she was odd. Maeda was interesting. Most fics paint h...
- Wed May 02, 2018 8:47 pm
- Forum: Fan Fiction
- Topic: Universal Gravitation: An Aoi Pseudo-Route [Updated 10/2/15]
- Replies: 150
- Views: 103081
Re: Universal Gravitation: An Aoi Pseudo-Route [Updated 10/2/15]
I really enjoyed this and I'm glad I found it while scouring the forum. I wonder if it's easier or harder to right a story about a character with no real backstory in canon, since it gives you so much freedom to do your own thing. Also, congrats on getting tapped to work on a VN, sounds pretty excit...
- Mon Apr 30, 2018 3:41 pm
- Forum: Fan Fiction
- Topic: Can You Remember Me? An Amnesiac Story [Updated 10/26/15]
- Replies: 157
- Views: 86861
Re: Can You Remember Me? An Amnesiac Story [Updated 10/26/15]
This was really enjoyable and pretty much the only OC fic I've ever gotten into. I hope you pick it up again at some point, I'd really like to read more about Seiki's adventures.
- Sun Apr 29, 2018 10:04 pm
- Forum: Fan Fiction
- Topic: Birthday Girls (One-Shot)
- Replies: 5
- Views: 5453
Re: Birthday Girls (One-Shot)
Very cute. And good on you for noticing the little details.